DASHED DREAMS (23 page)

“Know how much I love you?” he whispered into her ear.

“I think so.”

“Why so hesitant about it?”

“I don’t want to get into it right here,” she replied nodding to his father and brother standing listening to their conversation.

“Jillie, I LOVE YOU!” he shouted at the top of his lungs.

Everyone laughed.

Mike watched. He’d never before seen his son so head over heels in love with someone. He hoped that feeling was coming from his heart and not just show.

After the horse chores were done, the workers moved into the dairy. The concrete-block building consisted of two rooms. Next to the building was a large corral, milk cows stood around, some bawling aloud, others mooing. The three men went right to work and it was all business. Robert and his father moved into the other room.

In the room Josh worked in, held a massive steel tank with clear tubes coming out of the side, originating from the next room. This room is almost operating-room sterile. The outer door was tight, and a screened door also insulated the room against insects. Josh had the tank’s hinged lid open and was scrubbing the inside with a solution that smelled like bleach. After rinsing the tank, he looked up and smiled, as Jillian watched intently. She smiled back.

Jillian moved into the next room. There were six raised concrete stalls parallel to each other, a sliding gate separating each. In the raised milking stalls, Mike was loading up the feed baskets with grain and Robert was filling six buckets with the same bleach solution that Josh was using and sat them on a ledge. Each bucket held a chamois-like cloth. Jillian watched Robert work, not having to be told what to do. She figured that since he’d milked cows twice a day, from an early age until he left home, it was imbedded in his soul. He looked up at Jillian watching him, the
rabbit
.

“Jillian.” Josh said.

“Yes.”

“I’d like to introduce my sister, Lucille.”

“How nice to meet you.” Lucille wore crisp ironed jeans and a while blouse with a Peter Pan collar with stitched flowers on the corners. Her hair was perfect, not a hair out of place, naturally curly, short on the top and sides and shaggy in the back. Her hair color was chestnut like RJ’s and she had the Montgomery steel-blue eyes.

“Jillian, I’m so happy to meet you. Why are you out here? Did those men tell you that you had to help? Mother said maybe you’d like to come into the house and leave these guys out her.”

“I’d like to stay and watch.”

“It’s interesting for, oh, maybe one time.” Lucille laughed and Josh chuckled.

“I’m going back in and get Mikey settled.”

“How’s Mikey? What’d the doctor say?” Josh inquired.

“Guess he’s teething. Can’t do much.” Lucille headed back to the house.

Jillian held her breath, waiting for her advice on the child. She was relieved when she wasn’t asked. She returned to the milking area.

“All ready?”

“Just a sec, Dad, I’m almost finished here. I’m doing my final rinse,” Josh said.

Jillian moved over to Robert. He looked at her and laughed. He reached into the bleach bucket, squeezed out a chamois cloth, and wiped the side of her face.

She backed up and said, “What’re you doing?”

“You had mud on your cheek. See?” He showed her the cloth with a large glob of mud on it.

“Oh, thanks.”

“Okay, let’s go.” Josh said from the other room. He hit a switch and a compressor noise started. Josh and his father wore rubber gloves and aprons, but RJ didn’t. He made sure the six gates were open. He nodded at his father. Mike opened the wooden gate that separated the cows from the building. The first black-and-white cows hurried in. He quickly slid gates one, two, three, four, five, and six, closing each with a cow inside. Robert cleaned each cow with the chamois and bleach-solution. He then attached a milking apparatus. In seconds, milk flowed in the clear tubing, traveling into the tank.

Mike came over to Jillian, “Sure beats old-time milking with a stool, bucket, and bare hands.”

When the first cow was finished, RJ opened her stall gate and she walked through the gate and down the ramp that led back into the pasture. He moved all six through and brought in another six. Jillian stood watching the three men work in unity.

“Damn! Damn! Double Damn!” RJ stomped around, yelling.

“Son, you should’ve put on your apron.”

Jillian looked down the line to see RJ standing with cow manure all over his jeans. Josh got the hose and washed everything down. RJ was stomping and cursing. She laughed. He shot her a look that told her he wasn’t amused.

When they finished milking, both rooms were cleaned and ready for the same routine next morning. They made sure the refrigeration was on in the large holding tank and also checked the temperature. Mike opened up a screw-top pitcher, twisted a bypass valve, and filled the pitcher with milk.

“Mother and Lucille will have dinner ready. Son, get cleaned up and please don’t dally,” Mike said as he carried the pitcher of milk into the house.

RJ was still mumbling about what’d happened to him. Inside the screen room everyone removed their boots. RJ removed his jeans, dropped them into a basket, and made a flying dash upstairs. Jillian took off her shoes and followed him upstairs. When she reached the top of the stairs, she heard the shower running. She peeked in the bathroom door, “RJ, may I wash up while you shower?”

“Sure, jump in here with me and we’d both wash.”

“Be serious, I just want to quickly wash up, and get downstairs to help.”

“You don’t have to help, Mom and Lucy. You’re their guest.”

By the time he finished showering, Jillian had washed up and was in her room getting dressed. She was in her sock feet when he came into her room, his hair wet and uncombed, carrying his jeans, shirt, and socks, wearing only
tight
undershorts. The sight of him took Jillian’s breath. She excitedly thought: That’s Robert John Montgomery standing almost naked in front of me and he’s in love with me! He quickly got dressed and together, they went downstairs.

RJ opened the cabinet, removed the liquor bottle, took a glass from on top of the cabinet, and poured a drink. He paused one moment and thought about the earlier conversation he’d had with his dad. In one swallow he consumed the glass, then poured another.

Natalie and Lucille fixed a chicken feast for dinner. Everyone was talking and milling around the table waiting to sit down. As soon as they saw Jillian and RJ, they started finding their chairs, Jillian hesitated until RJ motioned for her to sit by him. She was introduced to Lucille’s husband, Larry. Seven sat at the table with Mikey in a highchair between Lucille and Natalie. After grace was said, plates of food were passed around with a pitcher of milk, ice tea, and water. Robert motioned to his glass to his dad and brother; they declined.

“Mom, wherever I travel, I think about your fried chicken. I miss your cooking.” Natalie waved him off, embarrassed at his compliment.

“Lucille, why are you staring at me?”

“I guess I’m still star-struck. You’re my brother and such, but you’re Robert John Montgomery. I see your face in magazines, on CD’s, and on television. My friends are always asking me to tell them about my gorgeous brother. But I still think of you as my brother with ugly toes! Jillian don’t you think his toes are strange?”

“I haven’t really studied his toes,” she said, embarrassed at the thought that everyone presumed they’d been intimate.

“I don’t have ugly toes,” RJ protested. Everyone laughed.

When dinner was finished and pecan pie and coffee were being served, Mike asked, “Jillian, what do you think of our little milking business?”

“It was interesting. Doesn’t seem so little to me. You milked quite a lot of cows tonight, even if the machine did do a lot of the work.”

RJ shot her a glance! At once she knew she’d said the wrong thing.

RJ exploded. “Hey, try doin’ this on a below-zero, six-o’clock winter morning. You’re nine years old and then you have to go to school. Gee, then you look forward towards the evening milking and it begins all over the next day. Oh, but then when the corn’s ready, you miss school to run the combine or drive the truck to the elevator. And summertime was for baling…always something. Jillie, you had your childhood on a silver platter…not like the rest of us.”

“Robert John Montgomery, you’re talking like you were a poor little slave-boy!”

“Duh, Mother, why do you think us kids left?”

Mike scolded, “Robert, you need to apologize to your mother and your fiancée at once. I think the alcohol’s talking. You need to stop at once. You’re ruining your life.”

Robert sat quietly with everyone looking at him. He glanced at his mother. She was hurt by his words. The quiet was almost overwhelming.

“I apologize for my behavior. Mother, I’m sorry. Actually, I had a great childhood.”

All nodded in acceptance of his apology. Slowly, the conversation resumed.

“Robert, did you show Jillian our track?”

“No, Josh, I thought we’d have a some races in a few days. Ready?”

“Wouldn’t miss another chance to wipe you out.”

“What track? On what?” Jillian inquired.

“Jillie, we have four-wheelers, we race around a track. We graded up a field with Dad’s bulldozer,” RJ explained.

“Boys, please remember what happened one time. Let’s not have a repeat of that.”

The boys replied in unison, “Yes, Mother.”

“You know, now I have my own doctor, so when I crash, she can mend me,” Robert said. Robert mouth-whispered to Jillian, Ask me later. the
rabbit
.

The men adjourned to the living room and the women started the kitchen cleanup. Natalie washed, Jillian dried, and Lucille put away. Again, Natalie told Jillian she was a guest and didn’t have to help. After a while RJ came into the kitchen and stood for a second, watching the three women talking as if they’d known each other for years. He was pleased. He stepped behind Jillian, wrapped his arms around her waist and kissed her cheek. In his hand he held an almost-empty glass, his mother took the glass from his hand, placed it to her nose, then shook her head. She emptied the glass and put it in the dishwater.

“Mother, why don’t you put in a dishwasher? It’d be so much easier.”

“Dear, I enjoy washing dishes. Gives me time to think. I stand here at my window looking out at my lane and I think about my family, wonder where you’re traveling, and just reflect. I watch the seasons change.” Tears welled up in her eyes as she looked to her son.

“Whoa! This is getting way too serious. When are you going to be finished? I’d like to have my girl back.”

“Jillian, we’ll finished up. You go on now. Thank you for your help.” Jillian handed Lucille the dishtowel.

Robert steered Jillian onto the front porch. The evening breeze was refreshing. They sat on a porch swing that hung by chains from the rafters. Jillian thought: We need one of these at Two Hawks.

“When and where shall we be married? We’ll live between Tahoe and LA.”

“You’re full of so many questions. Please give me time for all this to soak in,” she said, twisting the engagement ring on her finger.

“I thought we could be making some plans. Honey, I love you. We have to keep this quiet until after we get married. You know, part of my draw appeal is being a ‘sexy, single’ persona.”

Jillian simply shrugged and sighed. She suddenly, she wanted to end this conversation. “I really like your family. They love you very much.”

“They’re something alright. They like you.”

RJ placed his arm around Jillian’s shoulders. As they rocked in the porch swing, she leaned into his shoulder and closed her eyes. How safe and compete she felt at that moment. He leaned over and kissed her. His kiss warm and tender.

Jillian said, “So, just what happened once when you were racing?”

“Well, we got carried away and decided to play bumper ATV, and it kind’a got out of hand. Josh ended up in the emergency room with a broken arm.”

Later, as Jillian was about to fall asleep thoughts filled her mind: RJ’s drinking, his family, and their upcoming wedding.

Chapter 26

The next morning Jillian spent time with Robert’s mother. They had gone into Homewood for groceries. They’d made lunch for the guys who were baling hay. When they arrived to deliver the lunch, the ladies found the men ready to eat. Natalie and Mike sat under a tree a few yards away and began to eat. Josh joined his parents under the tree. Jillian looked around for a place to sit, then sat on a bale of hay.

“You might want to look where you’re sitting, Jillian,” Mike said, pointing towards the bale. RJ grabbed Jillian’s hand and pulled her up and away. A snake extracted itself from inside the bale.

Jillian screamed and moved towards the open truck door. RJ grabbed her hand, “Darlin’, it’s only a grass snake. They get baled like that all the time and worm their way out. It won’t hurt you.” He was laughing.

“I’m not afraid of anything or anyone…but snakes! Don’t laugh at me!” She was sobbing half from fear and half from the fact that he’d laughed at her. He put his arms around her and held her.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to hurt your feelings.” He kissed her on the cheek.

The entire time the rest of the group was watching what was going on between the twosome. Natalie got up, came over to Jillian, put her arms around her, and squeezed her future daughter-in-law. She winked at Jillian. “Well, fellows we have to be going now. Mike, Robert, remember, supper’s in town tonight. See you later.” She kissed her husband and nodded to Josh, got into the driver’s seat, and waited for Jillian.

“See you later, honey. Remember, I love you.”

“RJ, I’m so sorry I was such a coward, but...”

“Ah, go on with my Mom. Love you.”

“And I you.”

They kissed and he patted her on her bottom and the
rabbit
. Jillian got into the truck and they were off. Back at the house with a few hours left before the evening milking, Natalie sat on the couch crocheting.

“I always like to take a break in the afternoon, put my feet up, watch
Days of Our Lives,
and crochet. Do you crochet, dear?”