Daughters Of The Bride (19 page)

She’d been in his truck hundreds of times. She knew the route and how long the trip would take, and with each passing second, she found herself getting more and more nervous. Her mouth was dry, her hands trembled.

It was all his fault, she thought, trying to summon annoyance with the hope that it would counteract the growing tension. He thought he was so smart when it came to her. Sure, he was being really nice and helping more with Josh, but so what? It had only been a few weeks. It wasn’t as if she could trust him.

Which wasn’t really the problem, she admitted to herself. The problem was she missed him. Missed them. Greg had always been the only man in her life, and she didn’t want that to change. She wanted them back together. She wanted what they’d had before the affair, only without the drama. She wanted a husband she could depend on and she wanted that man to be Greg.

Heat burned low in her belly. She recognized desire. It was brought on by too many months alone and the close proximity to the only man she’d ever been with. Whatever else had gone wrong between them, the sex had been right.

Indecision tore at her. She wanted to ask him in...ask him to stay. She wanted to make love with him. Fast and hot, then more slowly. She wanted to feel his body next to hers, his hands everywhere. She wanted to kiss him until she was wet and swollen and oh so ready to be taken.

But they were divorced and she just wasn’t sure. What if she asked and he said no? For all she knew, he was sleeping with someone else.

The thought stabbed her, leaving her nearly breathless. She was still dealing with the possibility when he pulled into the driveway.

“Thanks for the drive home,” she said and opened the passenger door.

“You okay?”

“Fine.” She slid to the ground. He started to get out of his truck, but she waved him back in place. “I’m fine. I’ll see you later.”

“Rachel, what’s up?”

“Nothing. Good night.” She slammed the car door shut and practically ran to the house. Once inside, she leaned against the door.

What was wrong with her? So what if Greg was sleeping with someone else? They weren’t together anymore. He could do what he wanted. With whomever he wanted. They were both used to having great sex. Unless she was fooling herself. After all, he’d been with at least one other woman and she’d only ever been with him. Maybe what she thought was great sex was just ordinary. Maybe it was better with other women and he would have told her no, anyway.

Thoughts swirled and danced, leaving her confused and with a headache. Not knowing what else to do, she started the long, lonely walk back to her solitary bedroom. The one she’d once shared with the only man she’d ever loved.

19

WHEN COURTNEY STILL
hadn’t heard from her mother five days after the dinner, she knew there was a problem. The question was how to deal with it. The wedding was less than two months away and details had to be finalized. Perhaps more to the point, they were still a family, and getting along seemed kind of important.

They’d gone longer without speaking, she reminded herself as she drove through town. The day she’d turned eighteen, she’d dropped out of high school, packed a bag and moved out. She hadn’t spoken to her mother for nearly a year.

But this time was different. This time was her mother not answering
her
. She supposed there was some karmic payback in that and she probably shouldn’t complain, but she couldn’t help wondering...and maybe worrying.

Figuring the wedding would go on regardless of the family drama, she headed for the appointment with Gracie Whitefield, local celebrity and nationally famous cake decorator.

Courtney pulled onto the quiet street and was pleased to see her mother’s car parked outside Gracie’s house. The huge old mansion had once belonged to Gracie’s husband’s uncle. From what Courtney had heard, an entire wing had been turned into an industrial kitchen for Gracie’s business.

Courtney parked behind her mom’s car. She ran through possible greetings. The first one that came to mind was “you started it,” but that was hardly mature. She knew that technically she had every right to not share any part of her life. But technicalities weren’t always helpful—especially where mothers were concerned.

She and Maggie got out of their cars at the same time. They looked at each other.

Courtney drew in a breath and went with the obvious babble. “Hi, Mom. I’m glad you’re here. I think you’re really going to like Gracie’s cakes. She’s pretty gifted.” She hesitated, knowing she had to address what had happened. “About last Thursday,” she began. “I’m sorry if you’re upset.”

Just saying the words made her wince. Talk about a weaselly apology.

“I don’t want to talk about it,” her mother told her. “Let’s just get this over with.”

Courtney felt the emotional slap hit her cheek. So all was not forgiven, or even understood. “Is Neil joining us?”

“No. He was called away to a board meeting. He’s selling his company.”

“I thought he had already sold it.”

“The deal is taking a while.”

And it required a board meeting? Courtney thought he owned a couple of video game/pizza places. Would that really require a board of directors? Not anything they were going to talk about now.

They walked around to the side entrance to the house. Gracie opened the door as they approached. She was a pretty blonde, who greeted them with a friendly smile.

“I’m so excited about your cake!” She ushered them into her kitchen.

Gracie’s kitchen was large, with high ceilings and what seemed like miles of counter space. The decor was simple—white, painted cabinets, pale gray-and-white marble countertops and stainless-steel appliances. What could have seemed cold and impersonal was instead the perfect, plain backdrop for the extraordinary cakes being assembled.

There was a four-tier extravaganza partially covered in lavender-and-blue flowers. Another cake had tiny butterflies, poised to take flight. There were photographs on the walls and drawings leaning up against the subway-tile backsplash. In the corner was a pint-size table, littered with crayons and coloring books.

Gracie led them to a long table with eight chairs in a corner of the room. A sketch pad sat at one end. At the other were plates with slices of cake and a pot of coffee.

“I’ve been thinking about your colors,” Gracie said when they were seated. “And the fact that you and Neil can’t decide between vanilla and chocolate for your cake. So what about something like this?”

She opened the sketch pad and showed them a picture of a slice of cake. The inside was a checkerboard of vanilla and chocolate. The squares lined up perfectly.

Maggie’s tense expression relaxed. “It’s beautiful. Can you really do that?”

“Sure. It’s actually not that difficult. There are special pans and once everything gets rotated...” Gracie waved her hand. “You don’t want to hear the details, but yes, it can be done and it’s really lovely.”

She collected two plates and forks. Courtney saw that while the icing was yellow, the cake was the checkerboard pattern.

“Have a taste and tell me what you think.”

Courtney took a bite. The flavors combined perfectly. “It’s delicious,” she said. “I’ve never seen anything like this, and there have been a lot of wedding cakes at the hotel.”

“The hotel you’re practically running?” Maggie asked, her voice sharp.

Courtney looked at her. “Mom, what do you think of Gracie’s cake?”

Maggie shrugged and took a tiny bite. “It’s fine.”

Gracie glanced between them. “I have other flavors for you to try. Chocolate and vanilla, of course, and a really nice spice cake that’s popular.”

Maggie put down her plate. “This is fine.”

Courtney felt herself getting tense. Obviously, this was the wrong time for the appointment. “We should reschedule,” she began.

“Why?” Her mother turned to Gracie. “We’re here. If we don’t decide, we will have wasted your time. As I said, this cake is fine.”

“All right,” Gracie said cautiously. “Based on what you and I talked about on the phone, I’ve been looking at something relatively simple for the frosting. There’s a technique called scratching. It creates a texture on the cake that’s very beautiful.”

She showed them several pictures of cakes with icing that looked as if it had been put on in rows and then partially smoothed.

“I would do a cascade of flowers from the top down one side.” She put a sketch of a four-layer cake on the table. “This is fairly true to size and will serve three hundred easily. I believe that was the number you mentioned?”

Maggie glanced down at the sketch. “Is that the color?”

“The pale pink? It is if you like it. I would do the flowers in the colors you see. They would range from very pale to deep pink. Not magenta, though. Just true pinks.”

“I’ll take it. Thank you for your time.” Maggie rose and walked to the door. Before Courtney could stop her, she was gone.

“I’m so sorry,” Courtney told Gracie. “We’re fighting. But I guess you figured that out.”

Gracie smiled patiently. “It’s okay. You’d be amazed by what I’ve seen happen at these appointments. It’s never boring, that’s for sure.”

“The cake really is beautiful. I’ll make sure it’s what she wants and get back to you by the end of the week. Does that work?”

“Sure. I have your mother’s wedding date in my schedule. I need the design nailed down by mid-July. Otherwise, we’re good.”

“Thank you.”

Courtney expected her mother to have already left, but Maggie stood by her car. Courtney recognized the determined expression on her mother’s face and braced herself for battle.

“I can’t believe you kept this from me,” her mother said as she approached. “For years. How could you lie to me? How could you not tell me what you were doing, day after day, year after year?”

There were a thousand different responses. Courtney considered several of them before her own anger took over. “How could you not care about me for all those years? I was held back in school twice, Mom.
Twice.
Do you know what that was like for me? Do you know how horrible school was?”

“You had a learning disability. That wasn’t anyone’s fault. You can’t blame me for that.”

“I don’t. I blame you for not caring enough to get me tested earlier. I blame you for not noticing when I moved up from remedial classes into the mainstream ones. When I quit high school, I was getting As and Bs and you didn’t know.”

Her mother glared at her. “Of course. Make it my fault. I’d like to remind you I was doing my best to keep my family afloat. Your father left us destitute. You have no idea what I had to go through to save us.”

“You have no idea what I went through, either. The difference is I was the kid and you were my mom. You were supposed to be there for me and you weren’t. You didn’t see me at all except to tell me to try harder. I grew up knowing I was a disappointment and a failure in your eyes.”

Her mother began to cry. “That’s not true! How can you say that to me? I love you.”

“I know you do, but that’s different than believing in me. The reason I didn’t tell you what I was doing was because I had something to prove. I thought if I could hand you my diploma, you’d finally think I was good enough.”

“I do think that.”

“No, you don’t. You’re always trying to get me to try something else. You’re ashamed of me and what I do.”

“I thought you were just a maid. It’s not wrong to want more for my child.”

“No, and it’s not wrong for me to want to do it myself. You’ve never talked about me the way you talk about Rachel and Sienna. Even at the engagement party, you said ‘I’m so proud of my daughters...and Courtney.’ I’ve always been an afterthought.”

“That’s not true. I never said that.”

“Mom, there’s a video.”

The tears flowed faster. Maggie’s mouth trembled. She seemed to shrink a little. “Why are you doing this? Why are you so cruel?”

“I’m not. I’m trying to explain. I just wanted to do it on my own.”

“Without me.”

She wasn’t asking a question, so Courtney didn’t answer. Instead, she said, “I never meant to hurt you. I’m sorry that happened.”

“But you’re not sorry for what you did?”

“Getting my GED, my AA, and being a year away from my bachelor’s? No. I’m not sorry for that.”

“I would have helped you.”

“I wanted to do it on my own.”

Her mother brushed the moisture from her face. “No. You didn’t want me to be a part of it. There’s a difference.”

With that she turned and got in her car. Courtney watched her drive away. She felt sick and shaky. This wasn’t the end of it, she thought grimly. Not even close.

* * *

Sienna slid into the booth across from her sister. Courtney looked at her warily.

“So this is just lunch?” she asked.

Sienna frowned. “Sure. What else would it be?”

“Everyone is mad at me. Just checking you’re not.”

“No way. Like I said before, I think you’re to be commended for what you did.” She smiled. “We all know that if I’d been getting my GED and everything else, I would have been taking out ads in the local paper.”

Courtney relaxed. “Thanks. I need someone to not be mad at me.”

“I’m your girl.”

They were having lunch at Treats ’n Eats near the pier. Sienna had texted her sister impulsively and now she was really glad she’d suggested getting together. Funny how Courtney’s revelation had shifted everything. She was sorry her sister was having trouble with Rachel and their mom, but Sienna was happy to discover they were more alike than she’d thought.

“It’s the secret thing,” she said now. “Mom feels stupid for not knowing and Rachel feels betrayed.”

Courtney groaned. “Thanks for that slightly painful recap.”

“I didn’t mean it in a bad way. We all have secrets. It’s just yours are more interesting than most.”

Their server arrived. They both ordered diet soda and promised to look at the menu. Not that they needed to, Sienna thought. They’d been coming to Treats ’n Eats since they were kids and pretty much had the offerings memorized.

“So what are yours?” Courtney asked.

“My what?”

“Secrets.”

There were so many to choose from, Sienna thought. Her ambivalence about David—although that might be more widely known than she suspected.

“My engagement to Hugh,” she said impulsively, then wondered why she’d gone
there
.

“What about it?”

“Why it ended.”

Her sister leaned toward her. “You said you realized when you got to Chicago that it wasn’t going to work.”

“Yeah, that’s what I said. What really happened was, when I got to Chicago, Hugh decided I wasn’t good enough. I think his family had something to do with it, but in the end, he dumped me.”

Courtney stared at her. “You? He let you go? But you’re beautiful and smart, and WTF! Did he think he could do better?”

Hearing her sister’s outrage was both surprising and gratifying. “Thank you. That’s really nice. I like to think it was his loss, but at the time, I was devastated.”

“I’m sure. What an idiot. David knows you’re a prize, right?”

“Yes. He’s clear on that.” Her problems with David were different. Or maybe they existed entirely in her head. He was sweet and attentive. So why couldn’t she see them together for the next fifty years?

“My point,” Sienna continued, “isn’t about the engagement. It’s about secrets. We all have them. They make us feel safe. They get us through.”

“I was afraid everyone would tell me I couldn’t do it,” Courtney admitted.

“I would have.” Sienna raised a shoulder. “I thought you were...challenged.”

“Retarded,” Courtney corrected.

“We don’t use that word anymore, but kind of. When you were younger. But what you’re doing now is amazing. Not just because it’s hard to work and go to school, but because of what you had to overcome. There’s no way you could have gone through what you did and not have some emotional scars.”

Sienna had been thinking a lot about Courtney over the past several days, ever since the tasting dinner. She’d never thought about her sister’s life from her point of view. Not really. But to have been held back and then be so tall. It had to have been hard. Or even impossible. But here she was. A success.

“I’ve never said this before and I hope you take it in the right way, but I’m really proud of you.”

Courtney smiled. “Thank you. That means a lot.”

Sienna smiled back. “Good. Now, what happened with Mom? I asked her about the wedding cake and she couldn’t tell me anything beyond the fact that it’s pink. Did you really have a fight in Gracie’s kitchen?”

“Oh, no. That would be classy. We had a fight on the street. In front of the neighbors.”

Sienna grinned. “That’s my girl. Tell me everything.”

* * *

Courtney carefully wiped down the bathroom counter before double-checking that she’d left the correct number of towels. She scanned the room for any supplies she might have forgotten on a tabletop or nightstand, then walked out of the room and closed the door behind her. She turned toward her cart and jumped when she saw Joyce hovering in the hall.