Defended & Desired (16 page)

Except…if she were honest, at some point over the past few days, they’d graduated from a strictly sexual relationship to something greater, deeper. He amazed her by putting action behind his every word. He only made commitments he believed he could follow through on, and once committed he always followed through. Reasons to admire him continued to pile up in his favor.

He made her feel like the only woman he wanted, would ever want, though her ingrained instincts still warned her not to get too close. But falling for him didn’t terrify her like it once had. In fact, she’d come to a point where she couldn’t imagine going through a whole day without seeing him, without feeling electrified by his presence.

Although, on Thursday, she wondered if that day had arrived. They were both in and out of meetings from nine a.m. to five p.m. She didn’t see him or hear from him once.

Drawing her phone out of her purse at six o’clock, she started texting him then erased the message. She sighed, waited another ten minutes, and scrolled to his number again. “Hey,” she began in another, but hit delete.

Dang it, she could go one full day without him. Right?

Finally caving in, she wrote a quick text asking how his day went and hit send before she drove herself crazy. He didn’t respond.

Annoyed with herself for acting like a schoolgirl with her first crush—which was totally ridiculous—she packed up, found her Prius sitting alone in the parking lot, and drove to the hotel. She was stepping out of her car when her phone rang.

Pleasure spiked her veins when she saw his number. “Hey,” she answered, trying not to grin like an idiot.

“How was your day, sunshine?”

Giving up the pretense, she grinned like an idiot anyway. “Except for not seeing you, it was good.”

“Can I make it better?”

Yes, please!
“What did you have in mind?”

“I’ll pick you up in thirty minutes.”

“Casual or formal.”

“Casual. See you in a few.”

She practically skipped into the building and past the front desk as she went up to her room to change. She liked the way he stared at her legs when she wore skirts, so she shimmied out of her work clothes and pulled on a white thong that wouldn’t show under the tight white skirt she’d chosen. Then she pulled on a flowing turquoise top over her white camisole.

A half-hour later she met him in the lobby. He looked striking in dark jeans and a fitted short-sleeved polo. The bands of the sleeves stretched over his imposing biceps, a very different impression than his typical work suits. The sight of him made her girl parts sing.

He swept her into his arms. “Hey, gorgeous.”

“Hey, handsome.”

In front of everyone, he planted a firm kiss on her lips. Their first full on public display of affection He left her breathless and wanting more, enjoying the claim he laid to her with his warm mouth.

Then he took her hand and led her out to his car. After he shut her door and climbed into the driver’s side, she stared down at the turquoise medallions bejeweling her sandals. She really needed to tell him the truth about her intentions to take a new.

Only, he looked so happy. He radiated confidence and vitality, and his unstoppable grin made her giddy. She hated ruining the night so soon with the reality that threatened their blissful fantasy.

So she brought up a topic that might eventually lead to the truth—when the time was right. “I’ve decided to go back home.”

He arched an eyebrow. “You sure?”

Nodding, she explained, “I think I’ll be okay. Logan’s company confirmed my system was accessed remotely. They set up an alert in the system to warn the company, which will warn me if anything like that happens again. Besides, you’ve been beyond generous with the hotel room this week. And I need to take my life back.”

Sliding his fingers under her palm, he took her hand and lifted it to his lips. “I get where you’re coming from, but it’s not an issue. Stay at the hotel as long as you want.”

“I appreciate the gesture—”

“It’s not a gesture, Dev,” he insisted. The affectionate nickname caused a ribbon of pleasure to curl in her chest. Only her closest family had called her Dev. “I want you to feel safe.” He squeezed her hand. “Whatever I can do to accomplish that, I will.”

“I know. Thank you.”

Sometimes, he seemed too good to be true. Trusting men had always proven an exercise of failed expectations. Usually hers. Going through life with her heart on her sleeve wasn’t in her nature. She couldn’t change overnight, or even over a week, no matter how much she wanted to believe in this man. She’d been burned too many times in the past.

Although she couldn’t forget the past, the hurt, the betrayal, she also couldn’t help wanting to dive into whatever the future held, as long as Trey was a part of it. He was nothing like her ex. Yet, as much as she’d come to trust and care for Trey, she still wasn’t sure if she trusted herself.

Tension gathered at the top of her spine. “I appreciate all you’ve done over the past week for me, but I need to live life on my terms, no one else’s. Definitely not some hacker’s.”

His smile dimmed. “I get it. I respect that.”

He released her hand and played with the radio dials until the station landed on a Journey song. “Don’t Stop Believing” wailed through the speakers, the same song she’d danced to the night they went to Jake’s Bar. She would never listen to Rush or Journey again without thinking of him. Her ribs squeezed with restrained emotion.

She glanced over at Trey and saw a smirk playing on his lips. “What are you thinking about?” she asked.

“You.
On the dance floor at that dive bar. How all those sleazebag guys were staring at your ass.” He squeezed her hand. “And how territorial I got, even though I knew you were leaving with me.”

“You mean you were jealous?” Her abdomen fluttered at his Neanderthal response.

He lifted a shoulder. “Maybe.”

“Interesting.”

“Interesting good or interesting bad?”

“Good, I think.”

“Thanks.” He ran a hand through his hair. “Way to boost my ego.”

She rolled her eyes. “Oh, like your ego needs padding. Please. Spend another hour in your yoga class, and you’ll be cured of all doubts about your attractiveness.”

He arched a provocative eyebrow. “Jealous?”

“Maybe.”

“Uh-huh.” His face split with a grin.

“So where are we heading?”

He turned his right blinker on when they stopped at a red light. “There’s a concert in the park tonight. The weather’s perfect, the sun is shining, and you look amazing. I want to show you off.”

An inner smile perched on her heart. “What kind of music?”

“Eight-piece band, early jazz from around the nineteen-thirties.”

“Nice.” She smiled. “I haven’t listened to a jazz group in ages.”

“When I came to your place and saw pictures of flapper girls hanging on your walls, I figured you’d like it.”

“Good observation.” How did he keep doing that? Continuously intuiting what she liked and why? Few guys bothered taking the time to understand a woman the way Trey invested himself in discovering her.

Suddenly, her pulse stuttered. Her heart tripped and fell into a swirling pool of emotion. She grabbed her seat as if she’d hopped a rollercoaster at the top of a hill, and the ride began to plunge at breathtaking speeds. She grew dizzy, disoriented. Her heart beat so fast her lungs could barely take in enough air.

She blinked. The scenery around her came back into focus.

What just happened? She’d never experienced anything like it, freefalling into an abyss of stomach-flipping, toe-curling, raw and terrifying exhilaration. She couldn’t stop smiling, like she was…

Falling in love.
With Trey.

Oh, no.
Paralyzing doubt crept in, but it couldn’t dim this sense of freedom in flight. This desire to let go, let the momentum carry her to a destination where she belonged, but hadn’t believed truly existed.
Until now.

“I can turn the air conditioning on,” Trey offered, “if you’re too warm.”

Lifting a hand to her heated cheeks, she shook her head. “No, it’s fine. I’m good.”

I think.

Even as reason and ration returned to her brain cells, the giddiness remained. “I’m happy,” she said with a trace of wonder.

Trey smiled. “Glad to hear that.”

They pulled into a parking lot. He cut the engine, stepped out of the car and grabbed a basket from the narrow backseat. Then he moved to the passenger side and opened the door for her.

Standing on the pavement, she lifted her sunglasses to rest on top of her head. Her senses were amplified. The scent of freshly mowed lawn filled her nose. Cheerful birds sang in the air. The green leaves of the trees looked almost fluorescent against the bright blue sky. Pink and purple petals of clustered posies filled half-barrel pots and the blooms flitted in the breeze.

Instead of waiting for Trey to reach for her, she took his hand first, twining their fingers. His big hand engulfed hers and squeezed affectionately.

A smile filled her soul. Life was good. Very good.
Too good? The alarm bells of internal caution faded to an annoying ding, like a computer alert for an email she’d received but didn’t care to open. Church bells rang out across the grassy field, a pleasing echo that drowned the faint little dings of doubt in her head.

Lost in her heightened awareness of the moment, she didn’t want to be found. She wanted to enjoy this moment with Trey and the euphoric emotions unfurling within.

They set up their picnic in a square of grass between a young pair with tattoos and a gray-haired couple. Trey whipped the red-and-black checkered blanket until it caught the breeze and floated to the ground. She tugged the corners until the cloth made a perfect square then joined him in the center. He lifted one flap of the picnic basket and withdrew a carafe of white wine and two glasses.

“Are we allowed to drink in public?” she asked.

He nodded to the young couple on their left holding cozies of Coors Light. That answered her question. After they finished the turkey and cheese sandwiches he’d made, along with a carton of potato salad, Trey tossed their paper plates and plastic utensils in the trash.

When he returned, he sat behind her instead of beside her. He pulled her between his legs, and she leaned into his solid chest, letting her head fall back against his shoulder.

A sense of fulfillment rippled through her like gentle waves. She closed her eyes.

The bass drum thumped like the steady beat of Trey’s heart. The rasp of cymbals kept pace with the standup bass player’s notes. The brass section punctuated the rhythms with bursts of enthusiasm. Guitar chords lent a soothing strum.

A sigh left her lips. “This is perfect.”

He dropped a kiss to her neck and she felt him smile. “I agree.”

Then her eyes popped open. “Why didn’t you bring Peanut?”

Trey poured them both another half a glass of wine. “At the pet care place, the other dogs must run circles around him. He was so beat he barely ate dinner before he crashed hard in the corner of my couch.”

The image amused her. “I take him there only three days a week to keep him active and tire him out. Four days in a row and Peanut’s probably a slug.”

“Pretty much.”

“Thanks again for watching my dog. Sorry to make you a part time babysitter.”

He took a sip of wine. “I don’t mind. The little guy’s growing on me.”

“Well, you’re a champ. Most guys wouldn’t put a girl up in a hotel
and
take care of her dog.”

“You’re not just any girl. You’re my girl.” He kissed her temple.

That claim touched the deepest parts of her. Snuggling into him, she cupped his bent knees. “Do you know how amazing you are?”

“Tell me again,” he whispered with a grin.

Twisting to face him, she looked up into his sparkling brown gaze. “You are the most thoughtful, kind, beautiful man I’ve ever met.”

His eyelids lowered a fraction. “You’re just trying to sweet talk me into bed.”

She laughed and shoved at his shoulder. “How did you know?”

“Because that’s what I tell myself when you say things I want to be real.” Deep, dark hues of emotion swirled in his eyes. She couldn’t decipher each layer of bare honesty he revealed, they came in such rapid succession. Momentarily speechless, she nodded in recognition.

The silent encouragement seemed to lessen the turmoil in his eyes. He captured her mouth in a sizzling kiss. Parting her lips, he dipped his tongue inside and curved around hers possessively. Desire caught in her abdomen.

Then he released her. Though disappointed, she supposed this wasn’t the ideal place for a sexy make out session, but it would’ve been the right time.

Was she ready to do that? Lay her soul bare in front of him? She didn’t know the answer, and he didn’t seem to require one right that second. A little relieved, she sipped her wine and relaxed into his large, strong body encasing her. Simple pleasures were so rare, anymore. She relished these moments of peace and acceptance in his arms. Something she hadn’t found elsewhere in her life in a long time. Not even in the prospect of a new career path.