Emily produced a fan from the folds of her skirt and waved it gently to stir a breeze. “My dear, I am,” she said. “I have to take back all the derogatory things I said about California.” She laughed and her eyes twinkled in delight. “Why, if Clement had held the ball the first week of my visit, I might not be going back at all.”
“I’m really sorry you aren’t staying longer,” Lilah said, “Dinah and I will miss you very much. Papa too.”
“Oh!” Emily said abruptly. “Then you haven’t spoken to Dinah.”
Lilah looked puzzled. “I did a short while ago. Is something wrong?”
“No, no, dear,” Emily assured her. “Dinah has decided to visit me in London after all. Isn’t it just like her to change her mind at the last minute?”
Lilah sat back, momentarily stunned. Dinah going to London. What had brought that about? She had a shadowy thought of something Tabor had put in her mind, but that was ridiculous. Why should she give any credibility to what he suggested? Dinah wanted to spend time with Emily. Nothing more.
When Emily’s dance partner returned to claim her, Lilah left her chair to wind through the crowd and speak to any guests she might have missed chatting with earlier. Her duty done, she eased out of the ballroom and into a breezeway where she could stand and watch the dancers without being hounded for requests to take a spin over the floor herself. Since coming in from the garden, she had completely lost interest in dancing.
The husky voice of Tabor Stanton assailed her. “You look pensive.”
Lilah grimaced and whirled around. “If you come near me I’ll scream,” she said in a low voice. “Haven’t you caused me enough trouble tonight? Forever?”
Tabor propped his shoulder against a marble pillar. “The way I add it up, I’m a good month behind.”
“Meaning?”
“Meaning that’s less time than I lost being jailed and combing the countryside looking for a double-dealing songstress who caused me more trouble than I can care to recall.”
“I told you that was a mistake.” She couldn’t give him much argument on that. “I’ve offered to make it up to you.”
Tabor grinned. “You will. And soon.”
Lilah’s anger was thunderous. She started to walk away before it broke loose.
“Leaving?” He caught her arm lightly.
She shrugged away. “Yes. Please take note that I would appreciate your keeping your hands to yourself while you are here. This harassment wasn’t part of our deal.”
“Harassment, sweetheart? If touching you and kissing you are harassment, you’re in for a lot of punishment later on.”
* * *
Hours later Lilah was pleased to see the last guest leave. She kissed Papa good night before Ching wheeled him away. She was too tired even to think about talking to Dinah about her reasons for going to London. She longed for the peace and darkness of her room. Still, it was a long time later before she fell asleep.
She awoke with a start only a few minutes later.
“You’re beautiful asleep,” Tabor whispered from her bedside.
Lilah’s heart sounded a drumbeat. She scrambled over in the bed, wondering if that darkly handsome face was part of a dream or frightfully real.
“How did you get in here?”
He laughed and seated himself on the edge of the bed. “I like that,” he said. “Not a scream. Not a demand I get out, but a question. Didn’t anyone ever tell you what curiosity cost the cat?”
Lilah glared at him, too angry to be scared. “You can’t get away with this. Not in my father’s house.”
“Keep calm,” he said softly. “My intentions are honorable tonight.” Lilah’s brows lifted suspiciously. “I came to tell you I’m sorry about upsetting your friend Barrett. I really didn’t mean to let my grievance with you affect anyone else.”
“That’s awfully high-minded of you.” She sneered. “If I believed anything you’re saying—which I don’t.”
“Why, Lilah,” he teased, lifting the sheet and tucking it under her chin, “I believe you’re disappointed. Are you as anxious as I am for our week to get started?”
Lilah saw a look in his eyes she didn’t misread as honor. Her heart skipped several beats and her flesh shivered with forbidden excitement. She was dismayed to realize the wayward sense of longing meant she was disappointed.
“Go away, please,” she whispered.
Tabor laughed and smothered her words with a kiss. Her pulse throbbed in the hollow of her throat. Her skin burned as if she’d been thrown into a fire. Lilah felt herself going dangerously weak as his lips moved with fury on hers. His hand captured one soft breast, his thumb toying with the tiny stiffened peak. His tongue tasted her lips, flicked over her teeth, then plunged on into the dark warm chasm of her mouth, taunting her in a hundred sensuous ways until she was kissing him back and with her deepening response demanding more, more. The kiss was too short, too draining. Tabor pulled away, leaving her whimpering and breathless with passion while he held his ardor in check and smiled down at her.
“Don’t worry, sweetheart,” he whispered. “It won’t be long.” He left the curtains at the balcony doors fluttering.
“I asked Barrett to Damon House for dinner last night.” Clement lingered at the breakfast table with Lilah while Emily and Dinah were upstairs attending to the last of their packing. “He said he was too busy getting his notes and belongings together.” Clement’s gaze lifted from the muffin he was buttering to Lilah. “I was surprised he didn’t make time to see you before he left.”
“We said good-bye earlier, Papa.” Lilah shifted uncomfortably in her chair, wishing she had gone upstairs with the other women. She had written Barrett a note of apology and received a brisk reply with a restatement of his refusal to see her before his departure. She was thankful Papa didn’t plan going along to the docks to see Emily and Dinah off. She fully expected Barrett to board the ship without another word to her.
Clement eyed Lilah carefully. She hadn’t been herself since the ball. “I got the impression something unpleasant happened between the two of you. Should I know about it?”
Lilah felt her flesh color as she tried to think of a way to answer her father without telling another outright lie. “Barrett wants to give me time to be sure I want to marry him.”
“I thought he knew that.” Clement took a bite of muffin.
“He does, Papa. He’s just being overly cautious. Check and double-check. You know his ways.”
Clement’s brows rose a degree. “This has nothing to do with Stanton?”
Lilah fidgeted. “Why would you think that?”
Clement chuckled softly. Lilah’s discomfiture was evident. “Because I notice far more than you realize. You may not be aware of it yourself, but something draws you to Tabor. I can see that you’re fighting it, but it’s there.”
“Papa! That’s ridiculous.” Lilah wrung her napkin beneath the table. Was it so evident? “I have no interest in Tabor Stanton. Certainly not the romantic interest you suggest.” She had half a mind to tell her father what his “friend” Stanton wanted of her. Maybe he wouldn’t react as badly as she thought to finding out she was Delilah.
Clement started to laugh but ended up in a grimace instead. His face turned red and he drew in several heavy breaths.
“Papa!” Lilah cried.
“It’s nothing,” he said, pushing back from the table. “Just a pain reminding me these legs aren’t completely dead.” Once again he breathed deeply. “I’m afraid I’ve been pushing myself too hard these last few days. Too many trips to town. It’s catching up with me.”
“Oh, Papa.” Lilah hurried to his chair. “You’re ill.”
“Not ill, just tired,” he insisted, signaling Ching to come to him. “I’m going back to bed.” Reassuringly, he patted Lilah’s hand. “A day of rest and I’ll be better than ever tomorrow.” With difficulty Clement smiled. “Tabor’s trying another rider on the stallion tomorrow. I don’t want to miss that.”
Wordlessly Ching came and wheeled Clement away to his suite at the rear of the house. Lilah stood stoically where her father had left her. How she wished she had sold that horse instead of giving him to Papa. Tabor might never have known the truth if he hadn’t seen the horse.
Lilah’s face fell further as she realized she couldn’t possibly burden her father with anything else. He had enough to contend with just trying to stay well. Her problem was one she had brought on herself. Rather than upset Papa, she would go through with what Tabor expected. She really had no choice.
Shortly after Ching took her father away, Lilah left the dining room. There was nothing she could do for him that Ching couldn’t do better. When he was ill or in pain, Clement preferred Ching’s attendance of his needs to even that of his doctors. Ching knew the secrets of many herbs, roots, and other compounds yet unknown to Western medicine. When the pain was acute, he sometimes used long needles to puncture the skin. As much as the use of acupuncture alarmed his doctors, Clement insisted the treatment brought him relief. Lilah, too, occasionally availed herself of Ching’s remedies, finding them more palatable and effective than those her doctor prescribed.
She had only a short wait before the servants brought the last trunks down and Emily and Dinah joined her in the downstairs parlor. Emily was understandably pleased that she would have Barrett’s and Dinah’s company on the voyage. Lilah still didn’t understand why Dinah had suddenly decided on going along. However, she supposed she would never understand her younger sister’s capricious ways. A bit sad, Lilah took hold of Emily’s hands, recalling it might be years before she saw her aunt again.
Emily, who very much wanted to prevent a show of tears at her departure, hurriedly asked after Clement.
“Papa wasn’t feeling well and has gone to bed,” Lilah explained.
“I won’t disturb him,” Emily said, her eyes showing the sympathy she felt for her brother-in-law. “He’s made the arrangements for the trunks to go on ahead and we said good-bye at breakfast. Is the carriage ready?” she asked, opening the gold watch she wore pinned on her jacket and checking the time.
“Wan will call us,” Dinah said, tying the ribbons of a russet-colored bonnet trimmed with yellow and blue silk flowers. When the bow was carefully tightened beneath her chin, she took Lilah’s hands fondly. “Tell Papa I love him and he’s not to worry about me,” Dinah said softly. “I love you too, Lilah,” she added in an even softer voice. “Regardless of our differences, I still love you. You won’t forget that, will you?”
“What a silly goose you are. Of course I won’t forget. We’re sisters. Nothing could stop us loving each other.” Lilah kissed Dinah’s cheek, and having pulled her hands free, wrapped her sister in her arms. She couldn’t hold back several tears that splashed onto her lashes. “I think I’m even sillier.” Lilah dabbed her tears away with a handkerchief. “I was thinking of having you all grown up when you come back.”
“Oh, Lilah. It won’t be so long.” Now Dinah hugged Lilah, and though her eyes filled with warm tears, she smiled. “You take care of Papa.”
Before Lilah could assure Dinah she would, Wan announced the carriage. Emily and Dinah gathered the things they wanted to carry on board the ship, and with Lilah leading the way, left Damon House.
“Barrett is to meet us before we board,” Dinah volunteered as the carriage approached the waterfront. “He came down earlier.”
Lilah made no reply, since she hadn’t been aware Barrett was waiting for Dinah and Emily. But there he was near the gangplank of the
Serendipity
. Looking solemn, he stood by quietly as she and Dinah and Emily had another round of good-byes. He waited quietly too as Dinah and Emily boarded.
“We won’t write, Lilah. I think that’s best.” A lively wind whipped Barrett’s blond hair. He clutched his hat in his hand rather than lose it. Lilah was glad she had added extra hatpins to keep hers secure. Even at that she felt the need to reach up and hold it as the velocity of the wind increased.
“If that’s what you prefer, Barrett.” The bitterness she detected in Barrett’s voice saddened her. At least he had spared her the humiliation of a rebuff in front of Emily and Dinah.
“It is,” he said curtly. “Oh, it’s not what my heart wants, but it’s what my head tells me I should do. All the time I’m away I’ll be hoping to find you waiting here on the dock when I return. I’ll be hoping to find you’ll tell me you want to share the rest of your life with me.”
“I’ll be here, Barrett,” she said over a lump in her throat.
His expression was strained but proud as he took Lilah’s hand and pressed it firmly. He made no attempt to kiss her good-bye. After a few moments more with neither of them certain what else to say, he released her hand and turned and walked away.
Dinah, watching with Aunt Emily from the deck of the ship, observed the lack of affection in the farewell. She smiled and waved vigorously to Lilah as Barrett climbed the gangplank.
Lilah stayed on the dock until the three of them left the deck to go into the ship’s salon. Feeling very hollow, she walked slowly to the carriage and climbed in. Sighing, she dropped back against the pleated leather carriage cushions, wondering what was wrong with her that she actually felt relief at not having to concern herself with Barrett or Dinah for a time. Where were her tears that she might lose the man she had planned to spend her life with? She did believe she was becoming callous. In the end she decided her lack of feeling came from the strain put on her by Tabor Stanton. So be it. But as soon as Barrett returned, she would have Papa announce their engagement.
By then Tabor would have had his satisfaction. She would have completed her last tour as Delilah. The tour would be a short one, just long enough to mete out a measure of justice to the Penn brothers. Thankfully, too, Dinah would not be along. She would be safe in London. Lilah was confident Barrett would aid Aunt Emily in looking after her sister.
Clement was three days recovering and getting strong enough to resume his routine activities. Lilah ordered meals prepared and served to Tabor during that time, but took her own meals privately, if at all. She locked her balcony doors each night, though she was positive Tabor hadn’t tried to enter her room again. As if he understood her concern, he gave her no additional worries during Clement’s illness, spending most of his time at the stable.