Derailed (26 page)

Girly pushes past her and grabs my hand. “Stop it!”

“No, Girly, no!” I say. “She’s going back to Bradley. I have to help her p…pack.” I wish my voice didn’t crack. Embarrassed, I shake off Girly and stride into the bathroom, a lump the size of a golf ball in my throat. There I grab her toothbrush and toiletries. “Can’t forget these,” I say with a smile that doesn’t reach my eyes.

“Ritchie,” Rival pleads, “don’t do this.”

Ignoring her pleas, I scurry around within minutes, I have packed most of Rival’s things. “There. Just about all done.” I slap my hands together.

“I know you’re hurting,” Rival says in an unsteady voice.

I look at her glassy eyes, her trembling lip, and a surge of remorse runs through me. What am I doing? What the hell am I doing?

“I don’t wanna do this. I don’t wanna leave you. I love you so much, but Bradley, he will come after you if I’m with you, Ritchie. Do you think I want to walk away from you, from this wonderful home we both created? It kills me, Ritchie, it kills me.”

I don’t answer. Instead I sit on the bed with my shoulders rounded.
I’m sorry.

“I wasn’t planning on leaving today, you know.”

Then don’t. Please don’t go.

With a nod, and with tears running down her face, she picks up a suitcase and walks down the stairs.

She’s leaving. I have to stop her.

But I don’t stop her. Instead I grab the rest of her stuff and run down the stairs with it. “Don’t forget these.”

“You’re such a jerk,” she wails.

I fish out my wallet from my pocket, remove a five-dollar bill and stick it in her bag. “Give this to Bradley. He’s won, after all. Just like he said he would.”

She picks up her suitcase and walks out of the house. My instinct is to run after her and apologize, but I’m no longer open to reason or logic. When she disappears from my line of vision, I walk up to my bedroom, flop on the bed, and with my hands linked behind my head, stare at the ceiling.
Rival’s gone. She’s left me for Bradley.

My eyes fall on the photo of Rival and me on our bedroom wall, taken a while ago by Arena and then given to us as housewarming gift. I hop out of bed, rip the painting off the wall, throw it to the ground and put my foot through it. Fuck her!

Chapter Nineteen

RITCHIE

It’s a little after 9 a.m., and I’ve decided to take the morning off. I use that time to catch up with some work around the house.

“What you up to,
boet
?” my sister asks, walking into my bedroom.

I pause with my drilling. “Just hanging up some pictures.”

Her eyes fall on the damaged photo on the floor.

“Fell off the wall,” I mumble without looking at her.

There is a short silence before she answers. “I’m here to help with unpacking. What can I do?”

I’m grateful for her offer to help, but at the same time, I want to be alone. “The kitchen. Girly needed some direction with the pantry.”

“No worries, I’ll get cracking on it.”

“Thanks.” I quickly continue my drilling, eager not to enter into long conversations with my perceptive sister. I’m sure she’s heard that Rival left last night, hence her visit this early in the morning.

An hour later, she re-enters the room. “How you doing?” she asks, raising her voice above the drill, her eyes scanning my face.

I turn off the drill, wipe my forehead with my arm, and look at her. “Good. Why?”

“Heard about Rival.”

My shoulders lift and fall.

“Heard that you threw her out.”

“I never
threw
her out. She wanted to leave me and I…
helped
her leave. And…” I give a series of small shrugs and dress my hurt in a coat of blasé, “we’re done. It is what it is.” I turn back to my drilling, pretending to really concentrate on it, ignoring her staring at my back.

“Okay, I’ll talk to you in three days,” she says. 

“Three days?”

“That’s when the adrenaline wears off, and that’s when you start to feel.” Her fingers turn into claws. “
Really
feel whatever you’re supposed to feel.”

My wave is dismissive. “What a load of croc. Besides, been there done that, got the scars, okay? No biggie.”

With a slight wait-and-see smile, she turns and walks away. 

I ponder her words for a few moments. I can handle this. Sure I miss Rival. A little. But just because something is hard, doesn’t mean you can’t do it. People the world over break up – what’s the big deal? Besides, I’m far too busy with work and the house to find time to worry about a woman who runs away at the smallest sign of trouble.

The rest of the day is spent in a busy blur, and by the time night arrives, I am exhausted. After a bite of noodles prepared by Girly, I take a shower and go to bed.

The next day, I awake at 5 a.m., dress, and head for the office. Without interruptions of the day, the ringing phones and office buzz, I am able to complete a truckload of work. By the time our receptionists and admin staff arrive at 9 a.m., I’ve handled a backlog of work, and it feels like I’ve worked the entire day.
I should start work more often this early
, I think to myself and make a note to arrive at the office at the same time tomorrow.

That evening I stand on my patio and admire the lights in my entertainment area. One of the rope lights is weak, so I make a mental note to fix that. Liefie walks up to me, Gareth in her hands.

“How are you, Ritchie?”

“Good,” I snap as I take my son from her. “And you?”

“I’m fine,” she says, her eyes scanning my face.

Even though her words are seemingly innocent, I’m irritated at her meddling and her inquisitiveness. That’s all it is – nosiness.

“Heard from Rival?”

I stare at her, wanting to rant
: Why do you care? You never liked Rival, Liefie. I know that for a fact. You took every opportunity to give her a hard time and disrespect her, passively at that. I’m ashamed that I didn’t intervene or address the situation with you. I should have manned up and demanded you show Rival the same respect I show Vlad. I would never walk into your house without knocking and I would never enter without an invite to enter. I would never walk into your house and take stuff out of the refrigerator without permission, even if it was for the children. I would never walk into your house and use your oven without permission, I would never repaint bedrooms and reject linen that Vlad purchased simply because I didn’t like it. I regret the fact that I did the cowardly thing and pretended I didn’t notice the hurt on Rival’s face each time you disrespected and undermined her position as woman of the house. I regret that I said nothing, hoping that eventually it would all blow over and that we could live as one big happy family.

Coward that I am, I say, “What’s this fella weighing now?”

She doesn’t answer. That’s okay. I don’t feel like talking to her either. 

By 8 p.m., I’ve read the girls a bedtime story, put them to sleep, and taken a shower. By 8:30 p.m., I’m asleep.

I awake and look at the time. 9:55 a.m. “Jayzus!” I yell as jump out of bed. “Girly!”

She comes running.

“I’ve slept through my alarm, Girly. The girls…”

“It’s okay, Pig. I ask Liefie drive them to school. All is okay.”

I let out a sigh of relief, then run my fingers slowly through my hair. 

“Go back to bed.”

“No, no, no, I have to go to work.” I glance at the clock again. “Jaysuz, Girly, I can’t believe I slept so late. I have so much to do at work!”

“Okay, I bring you coffee, then.”

“Thanks.”

After she leaves the room, I turn and stare at my bed, my eyelids drooping with sleep. I sit on the bed and wait for my coffee.

The next thing I know, Girly is shaking me. “Come have dinner, Pig.”

“Dinner?”

“Yes. You sleep all day. You must eat.”

“I’ve slept all day?”

“Yes.”

My sleepy eyes turn to the clock on the wall. “6 p.m.? You serious?”

Then I smell food cooking, and I hear the sounds emanating from the kitchen.
Rival! She’s come back!
I jump out of bed and race downstairs.

“Hey there,
boet
!” my sister says. “I’ve made you some boboti.”

It’s not Rival. Disappointment shoots through me.

“Did you brush your teeth?” she asks as she wipes her hands on Rival’s apron.

I don’t answer, but turn and walk back upstairs. On auto pilot, I get back into bed. I have no energy to face the day. To face the night. I have no energy period.

This is the Day Three Arena talked about – the Day Three when the adrenaline has worn off and you feel. I feel. I miss Rival. Fuck, I miss her so much. How could I have thrown her out like that? Yes, I practically threw her out.

I pull a pillow over my face, only to be blasted with Rival’s scent. Quickly I throw the pillow off me. Then I reach for the pillow again and inhale deeply.
Rival
.
How do I do live without you?

RITCHIE

“Riiiitchie?”

God, I absolutely despise that voice. “Hello,” I say through clenched teeth.

“I can’t reach Bradley Murdoch,” Olga says.

“What do you mean?”

“He’s not answering his phone. I called a couple of times and it just goes to voicemail.”

My mind races – Bradley has backed off. Maybe getting Rival back has stopped him from pursuing Olga’s case.

“Can you go see him? Ask him to contact me?”

“Eh…”

Just then Liefie hurries into my house.

“Olga,” I mouth.

“She called me too,” Liefie mouths. “I think Bradley’s ignoring her calls.”

I nod.

“You there, Ritchie?”

“Yes, I’m here, Nadia,” I say and hit loudspeaker.

“It’s Olga. Stop calling me Nadia!”

“Okay, okay, okay!” I say. “Look, I’ll see what I can do.”

There is a small pause before she asks, “How are my children?”
My
children. Her question is loaded, calculated, and it has the desired effect – Liefie stiffens, while I feel like a red-back spider has crawled into my hair. 

By the time I end the call, I must admit, I feel a little better knowing that Bradley is ignoring her calls.

When Liefie leaves, I think about Rival. Her leaving me for Bradley has its advantages, I have to admit. Liefie is a little relaxed too, and seeing her at ease makes me relax. 

If only I wasn’t so hasty. But it’s too late. What’s done is done. I need to move on without her. She’s a mere habit. A bad one. What do they say about breaking a habit? It’ll take you twenty-one days to form a new one. Twenty-one days to forget her. How hard can it be? I managed to forget Liefie, whom I loved so much; I can do this. I
can
do it!

From then on, whenever I miss Rival, which is…just about every hour of the day, I look at the calendar on my phone.

Only eighteen days to go until I break the habit.

Only fifteen days to go.

I can do this. I can live without Rival.

Only ten days to go.

Only five days to go.

Only three days…

And finally,
only one more day to go.

RIVAL

As I make dinner for my kids, Bradley watches my every move, his fingers steepled under his chin. Under his scrutiny, I drop a packet of pasta. I scoop up the pasta, throw it into the bin, and whirl around to glare at Bradley. “What?” I snap. “Why are you looking at me like that?”

“What did you like about him?” he asks.

I turn my back on Bradley. “I don’t want to talk about him.”

“Talk about him.”

I look at him. “No. It’s over. I don’t wanna think about it.”

“Since when do you like the
uneducated
kind?”

He’s not uneducated.

“He’s a security guard.”

He’s not a security guard,
I want to yell
. And FYI, even if he was a security guard, it wouldn’t bother me.

“I want you to move in with us.”

“NO!”

“Why not? We have a spare room. The kids would love it. Besides, Scarlett and me, we don’t share a bedroom, you know.”

I sigh. “First of all, Bradley, I don’t believe that you and Scarlett don’t share a bedroom. Second, I don’t want to be part of your harem.”

“I want you to.”

“No! I’m not moving –”

“I want you to. It’s not an option.”

Arms akimbo, I glare at him. “It’s not an option, it’s a
threat
, right?”

He ignores my question. “Tomorrow.”

Exasperated, I look at him. “Bradley, we have two daughters. Do you want them to grow up thinking that their husbands can have two women in his household at the same time? Huh? Is that the life you want for our girls? Because children live what they learn.”

He blinks rapidly, then looks away. It must have worked, because he never asks me to move in with them again.  

Random Seduction Tip

To really seduce your mark, you need to isolate him. Whisk him away, from work, from home and all safety nets. Alienate him from the world he is familiar with. Alone with you, he will be isolated, vulnerable and pliable in your clutches, yet his dependence on you will be viewed as pleasure. Take him out of the comfort zone by cajoling him into doing things he has never done before, into experiencing the taboo, even the forbidden. Make it a spiritual and evocative experience, and he may even grow emotional. Luckily, you will be right there to hold and comfort him.

A weekend away with you or an unfamiliar venue will lend excitement and intensity to the seduction. You now share guilt and complicity – that creates a powerful connection. That playground you have carefully created – it will have to be somewhat mobile, because you will take it with you. Wherever you go, your playground goes with.