Read Destinata (Valguard) Online
Authors: Nicole Daffurn
“You know where your mother is right?”
“Yes of course, everyone knows my mother is in the psychiatric
hospital Zane, in a town of less than three thousand people it’s common knowledge.”
“Eva isn’t in the psychiatric hospital, that’s just what they want you to think. She is currently being held in an underground cell for disobeying orders.”
“What do you mean? I’ve been there, I’ve seen her there. She was admitted there while I was at school last year, she’s crazy Zane, not a criminal.”
“Why do you think you always need an appointment to see her? Why do you think whenever you visit she doesn’t talk
to you? It’s not because she’s crazy and pumped full of meds. It’s because they bring her in especially to uphold the ruse that she stays there permanently and because they sedate her before you come in.”
Charlie heard the truth in Zane’s words and tears started forming in the corner of her eyes. Why would they do this?
“Why? What could she have possibly done to…. to..?”
She couldn’t finish the
sentence, her tears now flowing faster and harder than ever before. She didn’t understand how anyone could be so cruel. Her mind flooded with images of her mother locked away in a dungeon-like cell, no windows to let the light in, no way for her to get out, shackled to the bed waiting for the next time she would be fed.
Ok so it probably wasn’t as bad as all that, last time she had seen her mother, she had looked healthy enough, she still had a slight glow to her skin and although she didn’t utter even a single word to Charlie, she had at least smiled upon first seeing her. That settled it. Her mother was definitely being looked after well enough to not have to
overly worry but the tears didn’t stop. Her mother had spent almost a year of her life locked up away from her only daughter. She could only imagine the toll that would take on a person.
She tried to continue talking but the hysterical sobs were making that impossible.
She saw Zane move as if to console her but held up her hands in protest and tried to get the flow of salty tears to stop.
“I’m sorry Charlie, I didn’t mean to make you…” Zane shifted uncomfortably, obviously not used to teenage girls crying inconsolably in front of him.
“It’s fine, just tell me why?”
“She started to fight the haze. No one knows how but she did. She went to see Mikal and demand that he tell you the truth, that he tell everyone the truth and then get out. She wouldn’t let it drop so…”
“So the only way to silence her was to lock her up in an underground prison? What, they couldn’t have found a more humane way to deal with the threat?”
“It’s the only way they know to deal with these
types of things, what else should they have done with her?”
Charlie raised her eyebrows with every ounce of incredulity she held. She had thought that Zane seemed just a little more normal than the other
Valguard in Tole but now she saw that he was just like the rest of them. Cold and uncalculating and definitely not human. Zane saw the shock on Charlie’s face and realized how he had just sounded, his face turning a bright scarlet color as he wished he had never opened his mouth.
“I didn’t mean it like that. I’m sorry… Again. I was trying to explain… Gah! I can’t explain Charlie, you just have to believe that I never meant it to sound like that.”
“It’s ok. But I need to see my mom. Now! I need to get her out of that place.”
“We can’t just break her out of a maximum security prison. It’s not that easy. I will help you when the time comes but right now there is someone else that you need to meet first.”
Charlie hesitated at the border of the woods that surrounded their small town, the last time she had been here, following Zane, he had turned the tide around onto her and although he says that he didn’t mean it and was sorry, she didn’t know if she would ever be able to fully forgive him for what he had done, or herself for getting into a position like that in the first place.
I must be insane! Why would anyone in their right minds come back to the place where they had been forced to the ground and felt up WITH the guy doing the feeling? Seriously Charlie, pull it together and get out of here.
She rubbed on the still tender cut on her forearm sub consciously and tried to turn away but before she could get more than two steps Zane had grabbed her by the hand – gently this time – and led her back in.
“I promise I won’t hurt you.”
The look of sincerity and regret on his face in that moment was endearing and Charlie couldn’t help but give him a small smile and move a little faster into the dark muddy woods.
“
Where are we going? You said we were going to see someone but you bring me back into the woods? What are we really doing?”
“We’re going to see someone just like I said. Not everyone who lives in Tole lives
in
town. Some prefer the quiet serenity of the woods; they say it’s good for the soul.”
He smirked at
her; he wasn’t going to give in so easily. Irritation flowed through Charlie’s mind but it was short lived, she needed to concentrate now. The woods were dark and boggy and it would take all her concentration to get through without falling over her own feet let alone finding her way along the almost non-existent path through thick mud and fallen branches.
About ten
minutes and a bruised shin later they came upon the path where they had been the night before. Charlie stopped, looking around at the still disturbed muddy ground, her fight or flight instincts taking over. She chose to fight, she gritted her teeth at the memory of what had passed but pushed on through the thick underbrush to stand right in the spot she had fled from Zane, when she had thought she had been ready to address the man who would now be known as father. The recap of the previous night ran through her mind on fast forward and Charlie wanted nothing more than to once again run away. Standing in a trance-like state, daydreaming about returning to her former life when she knew little enough to stay safe, she jumped slightly when Zane approached without a sound and placed his warm hands on her shoulders from behind.
She spun to face him, tears streaking her face once again.
“Why did you do it?”
“You were following me, I… I… I don’t know.” Zane looked at the ground shamefully, wishing he had never touched Charlie, also wishing he could rewind and do things differently but knowing that all the wishing in the world would do no good, she would have to learn to trust him again in time and he would just have to wait for that time to come on its own.
Wiping the tears from her face and taking a deep breath Charlie pushed on, turning back to see Zane following slowly along behind her, still shameful over the harsh acts he had delivered and for the foreseeable future wouldn’t be forgotten.
“Where to then? You’re supposed to be leading not me.”
“Right. Umm, take a left about a hundred meters down the trail.”
They continued on in silence, fighting their way through
the hanging vines and dense bushes that lined the once well-trodden trail through the forest. Within minutes she saw the left turn and immediately wanted to turn back but instead stopping and waiting for Zane to catch up. This part of the forest was dark, darker than the rest, like someone had laid a blanket over the tree tops to stop even the smallest amount of light filtering in. There was no way she was walking in there alone.
“What’s up? Why didn’t you turn?”
“I may be half Valguard Zane, but are you forgetting that I am still half human and not completely indestructible?”
Charlie nodded her head to the dark path through the trees in explanation of why she wasn’t moving a foot and she saw the recognition on Zane’s face as he realized what she was afraid of.
“Oh. Right. Sorry.”
Moving in front of her now, Zane led the way through the dark dank trees forgetting once again that Charlie was only
half
Valguard and didn’t have the spectacular ability to see like a cat in the dark the way that he apparently did. She tried her best to keep up, gaining a few more bruises in the process but keeping as close as possible. It would be far worse to lose sight of Zane and get lost in the woods on her own than to add a few more bumps and bruises to her already extensive collection.
Two minutes later they arrived at a small clearing, it was still dark but at least there was a small amount of light beaming through the trees here. They stood in front of a small cottage, one worthy of being in a Disney fairytale and Charlie was immediately reminded of her childhood. For some reason she had the uncanny sense that she had been here before. It was like de-ja-vu, she could have sworn that she had been standing right here at some point in her life and if she waited long enough an old woman with greying hair and unseeing eyes would walk out to greet her.
She shook her head, thinking herself absolutely crazy but not entirely being able to get rid of the odd feeling sitting in the pit of her stomach. Zane waved her on, wanting her to catch up to where he was now standing at the door of the cottage. He made no attempt to knock on the door, or call out to whoever lived here, he just stood expectantly, waiting as if he knew the owner of the quaint place would know he was there, whether he made his presence known or not.
Turns out, he was right. Just as Charlie had stepped forward to take over, sick of waiting on Zane to take charge and do something, anything to coax the person who lived he
re out. The door opened a crack, Charlie sucked in a gasp and fell backwards into the warmth of Zane’s chest. He grabbed her gently by the shoulders, straightening her up and giving her an assuring smile letting her know somehow that it was ok.
The woman standing in front of her was the exact same woman she had imagined. She was
blind; it was apparent from the milky white film that covered the deep brown of her eyes, her gray hair split at the ends in disarray, her pale skin, wrinkled and warn. The tell-tale signs of a life well lived. Every line told a story; Charlie knew this without knowing it. But how?! She had never met this woman before, she knew that now but somehow she had seen her in her mind, clear as day, exactly as she was standing in front of her now.
The old woman stepped forward. Charlie stepp
ed back. She was frightened now. She didn’t like the unknown; if she could she would flip to the end of her life just like a book to see how everything worked out. She wished she could. Sadly she couldn’t and that scared her more than anything.
“Don’t be frightened child, I’m not going to bite.”
She sounded sweet and old, much older than she appeared and Charlie suddenly had a flashback of reading Hansel and Gretel as a child. This woman reminded her of the witch in the woods. It didn’t make the sense of unease any better to be thinking about a witch who would have burned a child alive and ate him without any remorse.
Am I really this stupid? I followed Zane into the woods AGAIN?! Seriously Charlie, pull yourself together, this was never going to end pretty. Well there’s nothing for it now, you have to go through with it!
“Charlie, this is Kara. I think you will find that you both have something in common. Why don’t we move inside?”
“Yes, of course. Come inside Charlie. Zane.”
Kara tilted her head in a ge
sture that was purely inviting and maybe just a tad nervous. The apprehension about this place and about Kara suddenly dissolved when Charlie entered the small cottage. There was clutter everywhere, in every single place her eyes rested on, there was just
stuff
. In one corner there was the biggest amount of teapots she had ever seen, perched precariously on top of each other. They were teetering so much that she could have sworn if little more than a draft came through they would spill, shattering into a million pieces over the slate flooring. There were piles and piles of books and cards, bottles and jars, gears and clocks, suitcases and bags and most of all papers! There were papers littering the whole cottage, some in stacks, and some strewn about so carelessly they looked to have blown about in the wind and just stayed where they landed. The first word most people would think of upon entering Kara’s home would be ‘hoarder’… Charlie’s was ‘beautiful’. She wanted to rifle through the old newspapers and smell the ancient books. She wanted to go over every inch of every intricately painted tea pot. This was heaven to her and she wished she could stay in this calm, cluttered house for ever with no need to return to her own too polished, too tidy house.
Kara led them through the small archway that joined the entryway to the room next door, this one just as cluttered as the last only thi
s one allowed one small faded floral arm chair and a mismatching floral two seater lounge. Charlie watched as Kara felt her way knowingly and sat gracefully in the extremely warn arm chair. She waved her arms at the two of them like they were making her uncomfortable by the way they were still standing and they made their way to the small lounge. It was barely big enough for Zane let alone the two of them and they were pressed together in an awkward way that made the hairs on Charlie’s arms stand on end. It was like every nerve in her body had come alive.
“Now, now. None of that, you have plenty of time for that later!” Kara’s voice had an odd, knowing tone to it and Charlie thought for a moment that she in fact could see, she wasn’t blind at all but the
milky brown eyes staring back at her said otherwise.
Zane gave Charlie a look that was obviously meant to ask what the old lady was talking about but she just shrugged her shoulders and turned away, she didn’t want to have this conversation at all, let alone in front of the old woman.
“Charlie, Kara is your grandmother.”
“Bless the goddesses boy, don’t you know how to be subtle.”
Charlie didn’t much care for subtly herself and was too shocked to really care anyway.
“I’m sorry but she is not my grandmother Zane. My grandmother died before I was born. I’m very sorry Kara, I don’t know what Zane has told you
, but my one and only grandmother passed away the day that I was born.”
“No she didn’t, your mother just wanted you to think that dear. I am very much alive and very much your grandmother.
Eva and I didn’t exactly see eye to eye you see. You were never meant to be born Charlie and yet here you are as beautiful as your mother at your age and you are none the wiser, but it will come and now that you know, it will come fast. I’m so sorry my dear.”
A single tear rolled over Kara’s cheek and fell onto the pale white, paper thin skin on the back of her hand. Why was this woman crying? Eva had never lied to Charlie, not ever, but that in itself was a lie. She had lied about Mikal, she had lied about being in the institution, what else had she lied about?
“Why should I believe either of you? The man who tried to rape me and a woman I don’t know from a bar of soap. Why shouldn’t I just get up and walk right out through the door and leave?”
“Go on then, if you think we are lying to you just leave now and see what is waiting for you when you get home. You will soon be back.”
“Kara, you can’t just go around saying things like that to people you have just met, especially not your own granddaughter, she knows nothing of the sight, you can’t just go…”
“What go blurting things out the way you do? It seems to be all anyone ever does to me anymore Zane, why start worrying about my feelings now?”
She wasn’t angry and although her head told her to run away from this small strange space, she wasn’t going anywhere.
“Charlie I…”
“Save it Zane, I’m not leaving and I’m not angry, I just want to know what is going on.”
But it wasn’t Zane who started giving her the explanations that she demanded.
“Well, like the boy said, I am your grandmother. Your mother and I had a falling out when you were born. I saw what would become of you, I tried to warn her but she just wouldn’t listen, and now look where we are! Right where I knew we would be… In the middle of a war.”
If everyone keeps talking about this dam war I’m going to go insane!
“What war? What is happening? Why is it happening to me? Why do
I
have to stop it? I just want to know what is going on… Please.”
The please added on the end was for Zane, she knew he would tell her anything she wanted, she wasn’t so sure about Kara. The old lady came acro
ss as sweet and gentle but there was something about her that told Charlie to be cautious when around her and then there was another part that told her that being weary probably wouldn’t help.
It was Zane who answered her questions while Kara stared unseeing out the window to her right.
“You have to stop it because you are the cause of it. You are the cause of it because simply, you were born. There was never meant to be a half being, our races aren’t supposed to breed, no one knows why, just that they aren’t supposed to and most don’t but your mom did. I’ve already told you this but you need to know Charlie that it is all the truth. There is no turning back now, I set things in motion the moment I told you what you really were. Finding out the truth is what has started this war, even if the Valguard don’t know it yet, they soon will. We can’t hide it forever and when they find out, they will not be as understanding as I am. They will not tolerate the fact that your father has let you live this long and this freely. War is imminent and we need to prepare.”