Destined - The Austin Series Prequel (2 page)

‘I
hate you
,’ I yelled
at her. She looked back at me with hurt in her eyes. I don’t even
know why I said that, of course I didn’t hate her, but I was so
annoyed. I’d just wanted one night,
one night
as a family, a
night where Mum, Dad and I sat and played together. It hardly ever
happened anymore and sometimes I felt really sad and lonely. I’d
been so happy when mum had given up work a few months ago, to stay
at home while she was pregnant. I’d thought we’d have loads of time
to play together, but lately she spent hours asleep and when dad
got home from the office, he holed himself up in his study. I
couldn’t wait for a brother or sister so I had someone to talk to
and play with, though I didn’t really like girls all that much, so
secretly I was hoping that I’d get a brother.

I ran out of the lounge,
slamming the door and headed for the stairs. I knew Mum wouldn’t be
able to catch me, with that baby in her tummy she was too fat to
keep up with me and I was
so
good at running. I had loads of
medals from school for running fast. I made it to the first landing
before I heard her shout at me to come back down. I ignored her and
carried on, stomping around to the next set of stairs leading up
towards my bedroom in the attic and I heard her trying to run up
after me. I froze when I heard a scream and a load of sickening
thuds. I gulped as I felt my heart beating wildly in my chest and I
crept to the bannister. I gingerly peaked over it and gasped as I
saw her lying on the tiled floor at the bottom of the stairs.

‘Mum,’ I whispered, but she
didn’t move. ‘Mummy,’ I called a bit louder, still nothing. My eyes
went wide with horror as I saw a bright red spot appear on her
white skirt. I watched it growing larger and larger, quickly
painting the material until it was completely red. I knew something
was horribly wrong. ‘Daddy,’ I screamed and he came charging out of
his study.

‘Gabriel, what is it? What’s
the matter?’ he frowned, as he put a reassuring hand on my
shoulder. I pointed a shaky hand downstairs and watched his face as
he looked over. He went as white as the snow all over our garden,
covering every inch of the green grass. ‘Get in your room
right
now,
Gabriel,’ he snapped, making me flinch. ‘Mummy’s not very
well and I need to look after her. I’ll call Mr. and Mrs. Tudor to
come and look after you.’

I could hear his voice shaking.
Dad was so big and strong, I really didn’t like seeing his hands
trembling and hearing his voice shake like that. He started running
down the stairs as he yelled at me to get into my room, close the
door and not come out until Doug’s parents came to get me. I did as
I was told, too scared to do anything else. I grabbed my teddy
bear, crawled under the bed and started crying. Mum was sick and it
was
my
fault. I made her cross and chase after me. With her
big tummy she must have wobbled over while she was chasing me up
the stairs. What had I done? Dad was going to be so furious with me
when he found out it was my fault that she was hurt.

‘Please be ok Mummy,
please
,’ I whispered into teddy’s neck as I squeezed my eyes
tightly shut. ‘I
love
you.’

Mrs. Tudor cooked me porridge
for breakfast, with loads of honey, then gave me a sugary jammy
donut and stroked my hair. I wasn’t usually allowed sugary treats
for breakfast and I figured it must be because it was Christmas
day, as Doug had one too. She looked very upset and kept crying.
Every now and then she would come over and hug me tightly and give
me a kiss on the top of my head. She was nice, I really liked
Doug’s mum and dad, but it was Christmas day and I wanted to be at
home with my own parents. Mr. Tudor ushered us all into the lounge
and put the TV on. There were loads of presents under the tree, all
of mine had been packed up and brought over to their house. I
screamed and ran around the room happily when I found my Beyblade,
waving it triumphantly in the air. Mrs. Tudor burst into tears and
left the room. I frowned, why was she upset that I liked my
Christmas present? I decided I’d probably never understand
women.

‘When are Mum and Dad coming to
get me?’ I asked as I ate my turkey dinner.

‘Dad will be here to see you as
soon as he can, Gabe.’ Mr. Tudor ruffled my hair, but Mrs. Tudor
started crying again and left the table. That was definitely a
woman thing, she cried
a lot
. Doug looked at me and rolled
his eyes and I chuckled.

We were playing with our
presents when there was a knock at the front door and Mr. Tudor
went to answer it. I looked up at the clock, it was already nearly
bedtime. I shouted with happiness to hear my dad’s voice and ran
out into the hall and threw my arms around his waist. He had a
suitcase next to him, my suitcase with my Spiderman stickers all
over it. I figured he’d brought it to pack up all my presents to
take me home. He slowly lifted me up into his arms and clutched me
to him tightly and I heard him sob, a horrible gasping noise.

‘What’s the matter, Dad?’ I
asked and tried to look at him, but he held my head against his
shoulder as he carried me into the lounge and shut the door. He sat
me down on his knee and I looked around, wondering where Doug and
his Mum had gone. I felt dad’s hand stroke my hair, just like mum
did when I was upset. I really liked that, it always made me feel
calm and safe.

‘Dad where’s Mum? Is she
better?’ I asked as I looked up at him. He looked different. His
normal bright blue eyes were all bloodshot and he had stubble all
over his face. Dad always shaved, it was a ritual of ours. Every
morning he’d sit me on the big vanity unit next to his sink in the
bathroom and we’d talk while I watched him shave. Sometimes he’d
make me scream with laughter as he’d flick his shaving foam all
over me and then tickle me. He used to throw me in the air and
catch me, but I was too big for that now. I loved our mornings
together while he shaved, I felt like a proper man.

‘Gabriel, your Mum … Mum had a
very nasty fall yesterday and had to go to hospital.’ He spoke
really quietly and was looking at me so strangely.

‘But she’s better now, right?
Hospital’s where people go to get better isn’t it Dad? When can I
see her? I really miss her.’

‘Hospital’s where they try and
make you better son, but … but sometimes it doesn’t always happen,
sometimes …’ he stopped and took a deep breath that caught in his
throat. ‘Sometimes people are
so
poorly, that no matter what
the nurses and doctors do, they can’t … they just can’t do anything
to help them.’ I felt his hand move through my hair again as I
looked up at him puzzled. What was he trying to tell me? That Mum
was staying there for a while? ‘You remember your goldfish
Bubbles?’ he asked.

‘Yes.’ I nodded as I let out a
sad sigh and hung my head. Bubbles had died a few months ago, I’d
found him floating in his bowl one morning, so we’d had a little
funeral service and had put him in a matchbox and buried him in the
garden. I’d cried all day, but Mum had given me lots of cuddles and
ice cream to cheer me up. ‘I miss Bubbles Dad.’

‘I know you do,’ he whispered
and I looked back up at him confused as he started to cry. I’d
never seen dad cry, and here he was getting upset over my goldfish.
“Boys have to be strong, Gabriel,” he’d always tell me. “It’s a
man’s job to be strong to look after his family,” was another rule
he hammered home all the time.

‘Dad, why are you crying?’

‘Well Mum’s … Mum’s like
Bubbles now, Gabriel. She was so poorly that they … they couldn’t
help her and she’s … no longer with us. Do you understand what I’m
trying to tell you?’ dad asked as he lifted a shaking hand to wipe
his eyes with a white cotton handkerchief.

‘Mum’s not coming home?’ I felt
my eyes expand as I looked at him in horror.

‘No, no she’s not,’ he sniffed
as he shook his head.

‘
Ever
?’ I whispered. Did
he mean he’d put her in a box in the garden too? Like my
goldfish?

‘No, she’s like Bubbles now,
she’s left us … she’s left us and gone to heaven and she’ll be
watching over us, just like he does, because she loves us very
much.’

‘Why Dad?’ I asked. I could
feel my chin and bottom lip wobbling, and tears stinging my
eyes.

‘She hurt herself too badly
falling down the stairs yesterday and the doctors couldn’t help
her.’

‘No,’ I shouted. I didn’t
understand what was happening. Mum was never coming home because
she’d fallen down the stairs? Dad grabbed my hands and I started to
cry, this felt worse than when he’d told me Bubbles had left us, so
much worse.

‘Gabriel I’m so sorry, but you
need to know that your mother loved you with all of her heart. She
wanted me to tell you that and to say … to say goodbye to you.’

‘No Dad no, I want my mum,’ I
howled and he dragged me against his firm chest as I heard him
start to sob as well. ‘
Mummy
,’ I screamed. This was my
fault. Mum was never coming home because I made her angry and fall?
All because I wanted a stupid Beyblade a day early?

‘I love you, Gabriel,’ dad
whispered as he gripped me tightly and kissed my hair. ‘It’s very
important you know that I love you son. That will never change, no
matter what.’

‘I … want … to … see … Mummy.
Please daddy
,’ I sobbed, between gasps for air. I could feel
his shirt getting wet from my tears and I could hardly breathe
between the choking gasps and the jolts my body was making. If mum
was never coming home what about my brother or sister? What would
happen to me and dad without her? Mum always cooked and looked
after me. Who would look after me now? I usually only ever saw dad
in the bathroom in the morning and when he came to kiss me
goodnight. Was I going to be all alone all day? I suddenly feel
very scared.

‘Daddy needs to have some time
to deal with this Gabriel and to find us a new house to live in as
I … I
can’t
live there. Not anymore. So Doug’s parents are
going to look after you until I’ve found us a new home. I’ll come
as visit as often as I can, ok?’

‘No,’ I screamed as I hammered
my fists on his chest. He’d just told me that my mum had left me,
now I was never going to see my house or bedroom again and he was
leaving me too? He stood up and sat me back down on the sofa. I
wiped my arm across my face, it was soaking wet. I felt so ashamed,
boys weren’t supposed to cry.

‘Be a brave boy for me son. Try
and behave for Mr. and Mrs. Tudor and play nicely with Doug and
I’ll see you soon.’ He bent down and kissed my forehead and quickly
walked out of the lounge. I ran after him into the hall. Mr. Tudor
was holding the front door open, shaking dad’s hand. I caught up
with him as he was trying to leave and flung my arms around his
hips. I didn’t want him to leave me, I just wanted to go and see
mum and go home.

‘Don’t go Daddy,
please
don’t go,’ I sobbed. I sounded like a baby, I knew I did, but right
now I didn’t care.

‘Gabriel
please
, be
strong for me, be a big strong boy. I
have
to go,’ he
replied as he bent and prised my clutching fingers from his body. I
felt another pair of hands grab me by the shoulders as I wriggled,
trying to get out of their grasp as I screamed violently. Dad
crouched in front of me and looked at me sadly. I heard him saying
something as he ran his hand through my hair, but I felt like I was
underwater, everything was muffled by the noise of my screams and
the blood pounding in my ears. I watched him stand, turn and start
walking away into the darkness, through the snow towards his
car.

‘
Daddy
,’ I screamed as I
stretched out my hands trying to reach him, but I was being
restrained too tightly. He didn’t even look back as the front door
was closed and locked. He knew, he
knew
it was my fault Mum
had got hurt and he was punishing me. It made me cry even harder. I
felt another pair of hands lift me up and suddenly I was in Mrs.
Tudor’s arms and she cuddled me tightly, kissing my hair as I
cried. I buried my face in her neck, she smelled of soap. It was
nice and comforting, but she didn’t smell as nice as my mum, no one
did, no one ever would. I missed her so much, I just wanted her to
come home so I could tell her that I was sorry, that I didn’t hate
her. Mrs. Tudor carried me upstairs, got me undressed and put on my
pyjamas as I stood there, swaying in a daze as I continued to cry.
She gave me my teddy, then climbed into bed with me and stroked my
hair as she cuddled me. I cried for a long time, until I was so
exhausted that I felt my eyes start to close.

It’s ok, I told myself over and
over. Everything was going to be ok. This was just a horrible
nightmare. I was going to wake up in my own bed to Christmas
morning with Mum and Dad, and I wouldn’t care about my Beyblade, or
any of my presents. I’d just give Mum the biggest cuddle I’d ever
given her and tell her that I loved her. She always smiled when I
told her that I loved her and it was true, I really did. I planned
on telling her every day for the rest of my life.

I looked out of
the window as I ate my steak, sitting next to my dad. It was term
time, but I’d just been suspended from Dunsmaster school for boys,
for fighting,
again
. Dad really wasn’t happy that he’d had
to leave the office to come and get me, so I’d had a serious
lecture on the way back here. He reminded me that he wasn’t paying
all this money to send me to one of the country’s most exclusive
boarding schools, for me to get kicked out before I’d finished my
education. I’d just stared out of the car window and taken it,
there was no point arguing with him, it would just get him even
more angry than he already was.