Destined to Play, Feel, Fly Trilogy (45 page)

Just as I’m about respond with a ‘What…?’ he grabs my finger and firmly pricks the skin of my middle finger to distract me. Ouch! Well, that has certainly disrupted my recent euphoria. Angrily, I look into his eyes and notice a sense of urgency in them.

‘We can’t be here for too long, they will think something is amiss.’ He wipes my blood on to a slide, covers it up and assists me to my feet.

‘Are these your clothes?’

‘Yes.’

‘Good. Quickly, get dressed, you need to come with me.’

‘I can get dressed back in my room. I need a shower —’

‘Dr Blake, you are in imminent danger. You have one chance to get out of here as per the terms of your contract and one chance only — that is with me.’

He grabs my elbow and moves me to the corner of the room where my clothes are bundled and, much to my mortification, attempts to dress me.

‘Okay, okay, here, give them to me.’ I snatch my bra and undies from his hand and quickly put them on. ‘What is going on?’

‘Please, keep your voice down and keep your actions normal. Everything is monitored in here.’ I thought as much.

‘Alright, but tell me what’s going on.’ I pull my dress over my head.

‘Your blood results have presented certain interesting outliers and they are preparing to take up to a litre of your blood as you sleep tonight, before they release you.’

‘What? But they can’t, we agreed, the contract stipulated —’

‘I know, and that is why I’m here to help you escape. If nothing else, Dr Blake, I am a man of my word. The research doctors plan to ignore what was agreed between you and Madame Jurilique. I have no idea whether she organised it or not, but I cannot take the risk. I need you to follow my every instruction to ensure our safe departure from this facility.’

‘But how do I know I can trust you?’ I grab the lapels of his white lab coat and pull him near. He looks good up close and I inhale his scent deeply. Jeez, this pill must still be playing havoc with my hormones. I instantly release him and flush with embarrassment.

‘I’m sorry, I…’ Thankfully, he ignores my previous action.

‘Only you can decide that, Dr Blake, but whatever decision you make must be made in the next five seconds.’

I’m shocked by his words, but also distracted as the door begins to open and he punches me in the stomach, just as Dr Muir and Françoise enter the room, causing me to double over in pain. What the hell was that for? I think, but can’t say as I’m still gasping from his surprise attack. Jeez!

‘Dr Votrubec, I’m surprised to see you still in here,’ says Dr Muir. ‘Do you have your sample?’ I quickly glance between Josef and the women from my bent position, my arms still wrapped around my stomach, and I notice an almost undetectable nod of his head toward me.

‘Dr Blake is experiencing hot flushes, causing abnormally high peaks in her temperature and heart rate since the end of this session. That is why I was called here as she is ultimately my responsibility. She also just mentioned feeling waves of nausea, as if she could vomit. I will be taking her to the clinic where she will remain under my observation until these after-effects subside.’

‘I’m sorry to hear this, Dr Blake. Are you feeling these symptoms now?’ I sense a hint of scepticism in her voice as she turns from Josef to myself.

I quickly glance at each of them before deciding on Josef. I attempt to respond to her question, but instead start heaving and dry retching, further folding my body over as if in pain.

‘Oh my goodness, I see. Of course, she will definitely need to be given something for that. How unfortunate.’

Dr Josef gathers me in and puts his arm around me, bundling me effectively out of the room.

‘I’ll return Dr Blake to her room when the symptoms ease, Edwina.’

‘Oh yes, good…’ She shakes her head, looking perplexed, as we pass by. She turns to Françoise near the doorway. ‘This nausea still seems to be occurring sporadically in our clinical tests. We really need to get to the bottom of it before —’

I don’t hear any more as Josef steers me down the corridor, turns the corner, then down another long corridor. I have no idea what the time is, but there is no sign of the usual bustle of white lab coats and silver-clothed ‘experimentees’ wandering around. Josef moves at a silent, deliberate pace with his arm still firmly gripping my shoulder, steering me through the labyrinth of the laboratory. Suddenly, quick as a flash, he whisks me through a door and we disappear into the fire escape. ‘Follow me,’ he whispers, ‘we need to be quiet and quick.’

Not really understanding why, but responding to his tension, I do as he says and we descend two flights of stairs before exiting the fire escape. I scuttle behind him as we walk at a rapid pace along yet another corridor. To my left is a solid concrete wall and to my right is a long glass window. It is heavily tinted and as I take a closer look I can see what appears to be hundreds of faces, being herded along in lines. Some look fatigued, some bored — there are both men and woman — and then I notice there are children with haunted eyes. I instantly come to a stop, staring in disbelief at what I’m seeing. Dr Josef is ahead of me, but senses my absence behind him. He retraces his steps and grabs my elbow.

‘Please, Dr Blake, we have no time to waste.’ He tries to pull me along while I continue to stare.

‘What is this?’ I push my face closer to the thick, tinted glass to see more clearly. ‘Who
are
these people?’

‘I have no time to explain, please hurry, we cannot be seen here.

‘Can they see us?’

‘No, I will explain everything when we are safe. Please come quickly. We are both in grave danger.’ He implores me to action, and I move, but not before I take one last lingering look at the people on the other side of the glass, who look like they have been shuffled from one existence to another, some with suitcases, some with only the clothes on their backs. I shudder as I suddenly think of the Jewish people being rounded up in World War II and vehemently shake my head to dislodge the disturbing image. It wouldn’t be anything like that, surely? His grip drags me forcefully away and we reach a crossroads. He fumbles with some keys, eventually finding the right one, swipes it across a security pad which opens and he enters a code. The door opens and we are confronted with a stairwell spiralling upwards. He guides me through, re-enters a code on the other side, waits for the door to close securely behind us, and we begin our ascent. We climb and climb, round and round. My legs haven’t had this sort of workout since a horrifying step class at the gym maybe three years ago.

‘Josef, how much further?’ I pant as quietly as possible. For the first time my stomach painfully realises that it hasn’t been fed much for a while. I feel rather dizzy and fatigued.

‘We have a little way to go,’ he says kindly. ‘Here.’ He extends his hand toward mine and I grasp it to help me move forward. Up and up and round and round we go. How long can this continue? I feel like we could be at the top of a skyscraper. Finally, we reach the end and I collapse on the edge of the last step, puffing and out of breath. Again, he finds the right key and the door opens. A rush of fresh air reminds me how long it’s been since I’ve breathed in the outdoors. My lungs rejoice but the temperature sends a chill over my sparsely-covered body. I step outside. Oh not again, I can’t help but think — where am I this time?

Life is a series of natural and spontaneous changes.
Don’t resist them; that only creates sorrow.
Let reality be reality.
Let things flow naturally forward in whatever way they like.

— Lao Tzu

It’s almost dark but I can see that we are surrounded by water and I can thankfully just make out some land not too far away.

‘Do we have to swim?’ I really don’t think I have the energy for that — what a bizarre couple of hours, well, days really…actually, could be close to a week, for all I know. Oh, just shut up and stop thinking, I admonish myself.

Josef is busy at some sort of pylon, untying a small boat. Thank goodness.

‘Here, jump in and put this on.’ He hands me his white coat and I can’t help but think he might hand over his stethoscope to complete my look. I’m obviously delirious. Quietly grateful there isn’t a second pair of oars as he conscientiously rows the boat, I take a moment to look around and see a picturesque lighthouse behind us, where we apparently just appeared from the depths of the laboratory. Recognition suddenly dawns on me.

‘Oh, my god! We are at Lake Bled?’ I ask, completely astounded.

‘Yes, have you been here before?’

‘I cycled around here years ago,’ I say. Along with every other tourist who comes to Slovenia. ‘Xsade’s laboratory is beneath all this?’

‘Yes, but it is not a laboratory that is publicly acknowledged. It provides a useful gateway between Eastern and Western Europe. Not many people know about its existence, very few are aware of this emergency access through the boathouse.’

Unbelievable! One of the most beautiful fairytale locations in Slovenia, if not all of Europe. I absently wonder how my own fairytale might end and whether I’ll ever truly escape from Madame Jurilique’s wide net of influence. At least it feels like I’m making progress thanks to Josef. I can just make out the shadowy outline of the Julian Alps in the background. If my memory serves me correctly, before the church was built on it, legend has it that Bled Island was home to the temple for Ziva, the Slavic goddess of love and fertility. I’m in shock, could my life get any weirder? I shake my head and vow to never ask that question again, and decide to wait until we get wherever we’re going until I ask any more. This is really just too much. I think Josef appreciates my silence as he continues rowing.

After tying up the boat, we eventually end up at his uncle’s house, a short walk through the village. We are greeted with such enthusiasm it is clear that Josef’s uncle is very proud of him. He raises his eyebrows at Josef as his head inclines towards me and Josef shakes his head.

His uncle, who is a small solid man with a thick, salt and pepper moustache and well-worn clothes, seems to know not to ask any questions and welcomes us into his small, neat home. The fire is lit to take the chill off the crisp night air and the room is infused with the aroma of a hearty stew. It warms me from the inside out. Josef guides me through the living room and into a small bedroom.

‘I haven’t been able to organise too much at such short notice, but please help yourself to what is available.’ He indicates clothes laid out on the bed and some towels, soap and toothpaste. I remove his white lab coat and gratefully replace it with a soft cashmere cardigan.

‘Thank you, Josef, I don’t know what to say. I think I’m still in shock about this sudden change in events.’ Although I would have thought I’d be used to it by now! ‘Could I ask you a favour?’

‘Yes, of course.’

‘Would you mind if I used your phone briefly to call my children. It has been days…and…well…’ My voice catches in my throat and I’m suddenly overcome with emotion. ‘I’m sorry…’ I stutter.

He regards me with a compassionate look, then strides across the room and wraps gentle arms around me. I immediately tense, not used to an unfamiliar man showing me such affection. He feels my anxiety and releases me, instead reaching out for a tissue and handing it to me. Josef seems like a kind and sensitive man who will do me no harm.

‘Thank you. I just really need to know they are safe and let them know I’m okay as well. It’s been a while since they’ve heard from their mum.’

With a knowing sadness in his eyes, he replies, ‘I understand, but please be brief in case they are already tracing my calls. Actually, it will be safer to use Uncle Serg’s phone, just to make sure.’

As he turns to leave the room, there is a loud knock on the front door. He frantically motions for to me move behind the door next to him and quickly raises his fingers to his lips to ensure I do so as quietly as possible. What now?

I hear voices in a language I don’t understand, which I assume now to be Slovenian, as Josef stares out through a tiny crack in the door. His uncle raises his voice in response to the questions he is being asked and Josef closes the door silently behind us, resting his back against the wooden slats. He closes his eyes briefly as if he is trying to protect me from registering his fear and anxiety, but I can sense it in his body. He is on high alert. I swear my pounding heart is the loudest noise in the room. I suddenly think of Anne Frank and consider the emotions she would have dealt with on a daily basis, obviously facing far more dire consequences of being found. I feel nauseated at the thought of being discovered. Are they here to take me back to the facility? To take my blood — do they really want it that desperately? Oh, dear lord, now that I’m out, I don’t want to go back. I need to speak to my children. I honestly don’t believe my heart can take much more of this.

The voices die down and we hear the front door of the small cottage close. I let out a sigh of relief, as does Josef. He places his hands on my shoulders and looks directly into my eyes.

‘They are asking the residents in each household in the village whether they have seen a woman who is seeking help.’ He frowns. ‘They are describing you: slender frame, brown, wavy hair just below shoulder length, green eyes and English speaking. They obviously know you are missing. We will be okay, but we can’t stay here long. You must eat first because you are already in a weakened state, then we need to move. I will get the phone for you.’

I move to the edge of the bed to sit down, unsure of the stability of my legs. Josef hands me the phone, anxiety etched in his eyes. ‘Don’t talk too long. We don’t have a lot of time and I don’t want them to trace your call from here.’ Then adds with sympathy: ‘I’ll give you some privacy.’ He turns and closes the door.

My fingers tremble with the realisation that I finally have access to technology again. I quickly dial my home number before anything else happens to disrupt me and take a deep breath in an attempt to compose myself for the conversation.

‘Hello?’ A groggy voice answers.

‘Hi, Robert, it’s me. Did I wake you?’

‘Alex, hi…well, it’s pretty early in the morning.’

‘Oh, so the kids are asleep.’ Disappointment washes over me.

‘Yeah, of course. School doesn’t start till the sun comes up.’ I can hear his sleepy smile. ‘How are you?’

‘Oh, ah, I’m good. I just really wanted to talk to them, say hi, you know…’

‘You don’t want me to wake them, do you? They’ve been getting your text messages. Sounds like you’ve been really busy.’

‘Oh, well, yes, I have I suppose.’ I’ve been sending messages? How convenient. ‘Sorry I haven’t called.’

‘Are you okay, you sound funny.’

I can’t help the tears sliding down my face. ‘I’m okay, just busy and tired. Are you all okay?’

‘Yeah, we’re fine. Jordan’s started a new group project at school so we had a few of his mates over, and Elizabeth has been practising for her school concert. She’s taking it very seriously, of course.’

My heart swells with the normality of his words; I feel I could stay listening to him talk about their activities forever. A knock on the door indicates that my time must be over.

‘Oh, Robert, sorry to interrupt, I need to go. I have, er, another meeting now. Sorry I can’t talk longer. Please tell them I love them so much and give them a huge hug and kiss for me as soon as they wake up.’

‘Of course. Are you sure you’re fine, you don’t sound it?’

I straighten my shoulders to affirm to myself that I am, particularly as I know they are safe and sound, sleeping in their beds. Josef stands by my side.

‘Yes, just a little tired. Love to you all. I’ll call again soon. ’Bye.’ I press end and reluctantly put the phone in Josef’s waiting palm, attempting to quickly wipe the tears streaming down my face. I want to speak to Jeremy but suddenly realise that I don’t know his mobile number by heart. I’m only used to dialling it from my phone’s address book. In any case, I suspect that now is not the time to make another call. Josef still appears worried about his uncle’s visitors.

‘Thank you, Josef,’ I say softly, acknowledging the risk he has taken in ensuring my safety and peace of mind. He takes my hand and leads me out of the room to the kitchen table to eat. The goulash is hearty and delicious as I realise it’s the heaviest meal I’ve had in my stomach for days. I feel full and suddenly weary with the weight of everything that has occurred since I stepped off the plane in London.

After the food, Josef gives me a moment to freshen up before ushering me outside and towards a car.

His uncle has given him some water, bread and fruit for our journey, which I’m assuming may be long, and I thank him for his hospitality. I can only hope he doesn’t suffer any repercussions from harbouring us in his home. He hugs me as if he is my uncle and hands me a blanket to keep me warm. He can barely speak any English, but his body language is kind and engaging. I rub my stomach to indicate how much I enjoyed his home-style cooking which triggers a giant grin on his face. I think it is the first time I’ve had such a heartfelt smile for at least a week. Josef bundles me into the passenger seat while he takes the driver’s seat. I fasten my seat belt and lay the blanket over my body. I could ask questions, but exhaustion is settling into my bones and along with a full belly, I feel like I could easily drift off to sleep. He is focussed and silent as we drive off into the unknown darkness of the night.