Destiny of the Heart (Viking Destiny) (21 page)

Kristen woke, but kept her eyes closed as she lay
perfectly still, taking stock. Every muscle in her body was
screaming, her eyes felt as if something had been shoved
through them, and any movement she made sent pain
flooding through her entire body. Even breathing was difficult.
She tried to sit up, but that caused her head to swim and
made her want to throw up. She leaned over and felt her
stomach attempt to empty its contents, but all she managed
was a dry heave that left her throat aching. She wondered
how long she had been asleep. As exhausted as she still was,
she figured it couldn't have been long. As she lay on the bed
trying to find her balance, she looked at her surroundings.

She was in a comfortable room. The bed and all the
other furnishings had been bolted to the floor so as not to
move around when the ship rocked. They were lavish
furnishings, too. The bed was a large four poster with silk
sheets and matching comforter. A chair with plush pillows in
an oriental design sat by the small window the cabin offered.
Next to it was a table with a lamp. Behind that was a small
book shelf. And, in the middle of the room was a dining table
and four chairs. Simple wood design, yet elegant in its
carvings. All in all, she wouldn't be surprised if the room
belonged to a lord. She just couldn't remember what
happened and why she was there.

As she tried to remember, the cabin door opened, and
Derrick walked in with a tray of food. Her eyes flared in
surprise as Derrick looked at her and smiled. It was a genuine
smile that melted her fears. Whatever had happened, he had
been a gentleman.

"How long have I been out?" She asked, her voice
scratchy.
Derrick set the tray down and brought over the glass of
water, handing it to her and taking a step back. Kristen drank
greedily from the glass, glad to parch her raw throat.
"For the better part of three weeks." He said, relieved.
"I beg your pardon?" Kristen asked in disbelief.
"You took quite a beating, m'dear. And being seasick
didn't help.”
“I see.” She didn't. “How did I come to be on your ship?”
“I don't know for sure, but I think Mel may have had
something to do with it."
She looked at him blankly. There were so many things
going on at once that she didn't understand. She was
confused. Her heart was racing and her stomach turning, and
she just couldn't handle all of it in her weakened state. She
bent over and hurled, the water she had desperately drank
moments ago coming back to haunt her. Derrick was by her
side instantly, a cool cloth in his hand. He gently patted her
forehead and the back of her neck. She didn't have the
strength to refuse.
“I'm sorry, you should be resting.” He said.
“We haven't, that is, we didn't...” She couldn't finish the
sentence, but it was one of her biggest concerns at the
moment.
Derrick followed her train of thought and smiled.
“M'dear, when we make love, you will most certainly be
conscious and aware enough to remember it. Besides, you've
done nothing but vomit since the fight. You truly don't
remember?”
“No.” She whispered, embarrassed.
“You were amazing, you know. You impressed a good
many of the men that were on this ship, little one.” He said
with pride.
His feelings were taking a strange turn of late, and he
suspected that he would need to analyze them more closely
before deciding what to do next.
“Well, I don't recall, but I'm sure that if I had to fight, it
wasn't to impress anyone.”
“Perhaps. Are you well enough to eat? You haven't had
much, only what I could force you to eat when we made port.”
“No, but some more water would be welcome I think.”
Derrick took her glass and refilled it with water, then
grabbed a towel sitting on the table. He was concerned that
she wouldn't eat; she had lost weight and her cheeks were
gaunt. He felt miserable and somewhat responsible for her
current condition. The fact that she was so ill didn't sit well with
him. Derrick walked back to Kristen with the glass of water
and handed it to her. Then he bent over and cleaned the
puddle of vomit off the floor. Kristen sipped the water from her
glass and watched in wonder as he cleaned up after her.
She was overcome with the strongest desire to have
Derrick hold her, but she knew it was best if he didn't. She
believed Mel was capable of something like this, and since
she had already surmised that Mel was up to something, the
pieces were falling together. But, Kristen had come to terms
with that fact that Derrick didn't want to marry her, and if he
continued to care for her the way he was, she was afraid her
heart would become more involved.
“Better?” He asked as she finished the glass of water.
“Yes.” She handed the glass to him.
“Good. Hopefully we can get some food in you soon.
You are quite pale, m'dear.”
“I'll be fine. There's no need to coddle me.” She said
sharply.
“I'm not coddling. I'm merely looking after your wellbeing.” He said indignantly.
“I wish you wouldn't.” She said softly.
“Why?” He didn't know why, but her words had stung.
“Because it is better if you didn't.” She said, and slipped
into unconsciousness again.

Derrick stayed away from the cabin for a few days. The
urge to shake some sense into Kristen had almost been too
overwhelming. He didn't understand how a woman that set his
blood on fire could be so immune to him. At least, she seemed
so most of them time, though there were moments where he
knew she felt exactly as he did. He decided that she was
surely fighting the passion he knew was there, and she only
needed to allow herself to feel it. This trip would be just the
thing to help her awaken those passions. But, she needed to
get well first, and he was starting to worry over her continued
sleeping. At least she had stopped throwing up, though he
wasn't at all certain that if they got food in her that she would
be able to keep it down. Still, she needed to eat.

“Oh, beggin' yer pardon, miss. I didn't know ye was up
and about. I'll just be comin' 'round later to finish me chores,
then.” He bowed and started for the door.

“Oh, wait!” Kristen called.
He stopped and turned towards her. “Yes, miss?”
“I'd like a bath please, or am I not to be treated as a

guest?” She asked harshly. She hadn't meant to be so harsh
with the boy, but she was hungry and wanted a bath, and still
confused. It was wreaking havoc with her temper.

“I'll send for the cap'n, miss.” He darted out of the room
before she could say anything else.
Kristen sighed. All in all, she was beginning to feel
much better. Her previous tendency to throw up every time the
ship swayed seemed to have passed. She was hoping her
good fortune in that regard would continue even after her
meal. But, as she looked around, she knew she was a mess.
Kristen smiled to herself as she vaguely remembered waking
a time or two to find Derrick cleaning her as gently as he
could. The sensations that evoked even through her illness
had been pleasant. If her situation were different she would
have examined the possibilities further. But, if Derrick couldn't
settle for being her husband then he wasn't the one for her.
As Kristen paced the floor of the cabin lost in thought,
Derrick entered the room. He closed the door and leaned back
against it, taking the sight of her in hungrily. Her spirit was
certainly back, and her color had returned, as well. He crossed
his arms over his chest, his facial expression inscrutable.
Kristen sensed something was bothering him, though she had
no idea what that could be. However, since they would be
stuck together for the duration of the trip – which she hoped
wasn't much longer – she decided to offer an olive branch.
“Thank you for your help while I was ill.” She began.
Derrick lifted his brow. Just hearing her voice, stronger
than it had been in awhile, was putting ideas into his head.
“As I recall, you asked me to stop taking care of you.”
“Did you?”
“No.”
She nodded and smiled. Derrick felt his breath catch in
his throat. Even after being in bed for almost a month, the
woman was a vision. Her hair was still damp from sweat, but it
was streaming down her back in a most wanton fashion. With
her improved color and spirit, Derrick found his lust returning
in full force.
“Your food should be along shortly. I trust you feel well
enough to eat?”
“Yes, I believe so. Thank you.”
"How is your rib? The rest of your injuries seemed to
have healed nicely."
Kristen looked down at herself and gingerly felt around
the bandage. It was still tender, but it seemed to be on the
mend. She probably shouldn't get into any more fights for
awhile, though.
"It seems to be healing properly. There is no pain or
discomfort there."
It was his turn to nod. There was an awkward silence
between them, something Derrick certainly wasn't used to.
Neither was entirely sure what the other was thinking, nor
what they should say. Kristen cleared her throat in an effort to
end the silence. Derrick couldn't restrain himself anymore. He
pushed off the door and strode over to her in two steps,
gathered her in his arms, and kissed her deeply. Kristen
couldn't have protested, even if she wanted to, which at the
moment, she didn't. She felt his strength wrap around her like
a cocoon, soothing her aches away. She needed to feel that
strength. It rejuvenated her own. She felt safe, which was
absurd since this man was anything but safe to her way of
thinking.
Derrick's kiss deepened as she opened her mouth to
him. His expert tongue sought hers out, enticing her to reach
for his. Once he had her tongue, he didn't immediately let it
go, wishing to savor the silky smoothness of it. Kristen leaned
into him and wrapped her arms around his neck, her fingers
intertwining in his hair. Something in her consciousness
pricked, and she vaguely remembered there was a reason she
shouldn't be doing this, but for the life of her she couldn't
remember. Everything around her became a blur, giving way
to the heady pleasure he was creating.
His hand moved to cover one breast, and a soft moan
escaped her lips and fell into his mouth. His kiss never
stopped while his hand kneaded her breast. Kristen was
overwhelmed with new sensations and she quite forgot to
breathe, though it seemed she could still draw breath from
Derrick. His other hand came up to cup her free breast, taking
the time to allow each mound to fill his hands, then he tugged
down the bodice of her night gown and took one nipple into his
mouth. Derrick gently sucked and nibbled until it became hard
with need, his hands caressing her body as he worked her
with his mouth. Kristen flung her head back, too caught up in
the pleasure to think. She had never felt anything so amazing.
Her nails flexed and dug into his hair as his mouth
moved to the valley between her breasts. His tongue slid
seductively over her curves until he reached the base of her
throat, where he licked her until she shivered. She tasted
salty, but sweet and Derrick relished the taste as he pulled her
closer, taking in as much as he could. He returned his mouth
to hers and kissed her again. His manhood stretched painfully
against his breeches, so he rubbed it against her, letting her
feel the full hardness of him. Kristen instinctively rocked her
hips against him, exciting him to no end. He briefly wondered
at her acceptance of the situation but didn't question it. It didn't
matter. In that moment, he knew he wanted Kristen
permanently. More than a mistress. But, it was a feeling new
to him and he didn't know how to handle it.
Derrick lifted her in his arms and walked over to the
bed, laying her down gently. He removed her night gown and
looked deeply in her eyes, giving her the chance to stop him.
Kristen looked at him with nothing but trust, and made no
move to stop him. It was both thrilling and frightening to
Kristen's peace of mind. She lay there, knowing she should
stop this, but not having the strength to do so. She had denied
her body what it wanted long enough and, come better or
worse, she would enjoy herself now. She reasoned
somewhere in the back of her mind that she was allowed a
little pleasure for what she had endured. She would enjoy
Derrick for as long as he gave her.
When he finished undressing her, Derrick leaned back
and stared at her ravenously. He was so in awe of Kristen,
and she had no idea just how beautiful she was. She blushed
under his lustful stare.
“You are beautiful, m'dear. So beautiful.”
Kristen smiled, and he leaned in to kiss her again. She
desperately wanted to feel his skin against hers and began
pulling at his shirt. Her impatience caused Derrick to chuckle,
and he pulled away long enough to yank the shirt over his
head, then he was kissing her again. She sighed in
satisfaction and let her hands roam over his chest and back.
She could feel the power in his arms and relished it. Where he
touched her, her skin burned. On fire with passion that she
had never felt before, a sense of urgency came over her.
There was an intense need for something, but she didn't know
what so she whimpered and bucked underneath him. Knowing
what she craved, Derrick moved his hand from her breast and
cupped her at the base of her womanhood. Kristen's breathing
became shallow and rapid as his thumb gently padded the soft
nub he found between her legs.
Kristen was quite undone. She tore her mouth away
from his and gasped, pleasure racking her entire body in
erratic waves. A warm feeling was unfurling low in her belly
and that sense of urgency from before was returning. Derrick
slipped a finger inside of her, and she bucked, causing an
entirely new sensation to ravage her body. Chills ran up and
down her spine as a pressure began building inside of her.
Derrick slid his finger in and out, watching her, enjoying her
reaction to him. He was determined to take things slow. He
wanted her to enjoy all there was to lovemaking.
He drove his finger deeper inside of her while he gently
rubbed her nub with his thumb. When she bucked again, he
pulled his finger out. It was wet, and he knew she was ready.
Kristen cried in protest as he removed his hand from her, but
he lifted himself up to remove his trousers and boots. When
he was naked, he settled himself between her thighs and
looked at her, brushing her hair away from her face with both
hands. She felt unbelievable. The inferno in her was
demanding attention and she rocked her hips and ran her foot
from his hip to his feet. He smiled at her impatience and
kissed her.
Kristen could feel the tip of his hardness against her
and a pulse began beating where he touched her. The
pressure was building until she thought she might explode. So
many things were happening at once that Kristen didn't
understand what she was supposed to do. She scratched at
Derrick in frustration, but he didn't mind. He continued kissing
her, rocking slightly back and forth so that the tip of him
rubbed where his thumb had been previously. She shivered in
delight and bit his lip in excitement. He laughed and delved his
tongue into her mouth at the same time as he entered her.
She was tight and warm, and he was almost undone. He
passed the barrier of her virginity and stopped to allow her
time to adjust to him, but he kept his mouth on hers.
She registered a slight pain, but was quickly back to
feeling that urgency she couldn't seem to quench. She
squirmed underneath him, driving her body into his.
“Don't do that, little one. I'm having a hard enough time
trying not to make an ass of myself.”
Kristen frowned at him, not understanding his meaning.
He kissed her forehead and began rocking gently inside of
her.
“I'll explain it later.” He said as he moved slowly inside
of her.
Derrick's rhythm allowed Kristen to adjust and feel
everything all at once. It was as though every nerve in her
body had come to life and she felt them sing in exquisite
pleasure. When he began to move faster, Kristen thought she
would surely explode. He was thrusting faster and deeper until
she finally felt the warmth in her stomach spin entirely out of
control. The pressure and fire within her belly combined,
exploding and sending her over the edge of madness.
Kristen's body shuddered in waves of absolute pleasure,
something she had no idea ever existed. She gasped and held
on for dear life as Derrick shuddered into her body and
collapsed over her, breathing heavily into her hair, tickling her
ear. God help her, but she didn't want that moment to end.
Derrick rolled off of her and pulled her close to him,
settling her body comfortably next to his and lavishing her
shoulder and neck with soft kisses. Kristen was comfortable
and relaxed easily into him. He couldn't help thinking that he
had never made love like that before. Certainly he had always
enjoyed himself, but never had it been as soul-stirring as it
had just been with Kristen. He simply had nothing to compare
it with.
Kristen lay there with her own thoughts churning. Her
body still felt incredibly satiated, but her mind was coming
back to reality. She realized that she was going to be in a
world of trouble when this was all over with. Consumed by her
passions, she hadn't been thinking clearly. She didn't want to
think clearly now, but she had always been the practical sort.
She had just ruined any chance she had at a good marriage
and would have to buy herself a husband when the time
came. Truthfully, she anticipated needing to do that anyway
since she didn't have the time necessary to devote to a
courtship, but now she had time aplenty. Still, the part really
bothering her was that somewhere in the back of her mind,
she still wanted love to enter into it. She was certain that
would never be the case now.
“What are you thinking, little one?” Derrick asked softly
as he stroked her arm.
“That I'm completely ruined for a good marriage now.”
She felt his body stiffen behind her.
“I like to think that I can provide you a good marriage,
Kristen.” He said quietly.
Kristen didn't understand his sudden change. He had
adamantly refused marriage before, even when they had a
contract ready-made for them. She hadn't expected marriage
from him when she agreed to this, and besides, she didn't like
that he had changed his mind after making love to her.
“I'm not blaming you, Derrick. The decision was just as
much mine, and it wasn't meant to bully you into anything. You
have your reasons for choosing to remain unwed and I'll not
pressure you into changing them.” She thought that would
smooth things over, but for reasons she couldn't fathom, that
only served to make them worse.
“You're implying that I'm not an honorable man. I've
taken your virtue; you will marry me.”
She rolled over and looked at him incredulously. Did he
just high-handedly demand that she marry him? Like bloody
hell!
“I will not.” She said.
“Why not? Aren't you the one that told me to buck up
and ask for your hand in marriage?" He asked sourly.
"Yes, because I knew you wouldn't agree. Derrick,
we're not suited to one another at all.” She said reasonably.
“How do you reckon?” He challenged.
“Oh, give over Derrick. I've no wish to make your life
miserable, nor do I wish mine to be. Take it as a gift and leave
it be.” She just couldn't tell him the real reason she wouldn't
allow herself to be happy in his arms for he would surely laugh
at her.
Derrick scowled, but said nothing more. He got out of
bed and began dressing rather quickly.
“Where are you going?”
“To breathe.” He snapped.
“Why are you angry?” She asked, confused.
“I'm not.”
Kristen snorted. She knew perfectly well that he was
angry, even if she didn't understand why. He couldn't possibly
be affected by her words, could he? She seriously had to
wonder as he slammed out of the cabin without so much as a
goodbye. She started to smile. Perhaps there was something
to be said of catching a rake's heart. If she were honest with
herself, she wouldn't mind catching Derrick's. But, she
stopped. She didn't truly believe that nonsense about catching
a rake. Derrick would only break her heart. Not to mention the
fact that she would be putting his life in danger just by
association.
Chapter 24