Dex ARe (17 page)

Dex laughed in that deep, sexy timbre that sent goosebumps across my shoulders. “We’ll just have to train you to build up your tolerance. Should be fun.”

I took a mock swing at him which he neatly dodged. After we were dressed, I knew I’d have to walk through the gauntlet of knowing glances from any of the club members who might have heard our shower scene through the Den’s thin walls. Sometime soon, we were going to have to come up with different sleeping arrangements. We’d both been afraid to talk about it, I think. It meant a new level to our relationship that I know Dex was worried I wouldn’t take. And I was just as worried about what I’d say if he asked.

My legs still felt like rubber as I climbed on the back of Dex’s bike and slid my helmet over my ears. I put my arms around his waist and pressed my cheek against his back, taking in the warm, heady scent of the soft leather of his cut. He kick started the bike and the engine roared beneath us as we sped off toward the hospital.

***

“You’ve got a head lac in three, a four-year-old with a sour belly in one and a couple of sorority sisters who’ve learned the dangers of mixing too much weed and Boone’s Farm in two.” Joleen handed me a stack of charts with a smile.

I missed her. With me spending so much time with Dex on my off hours, we barely saw each other anymore. She’d also rotated to day shift. While I preferred working with her, I loved walking in knowing she would have everything in order when I got there.

“Sounds pretty fantastic,” I said and I meant it. I was hoping for a nice, quiet, run-of-the-mill night. Of course, those were the ones that usually ended in a shit storm, but for now I’d take what I could get.

Joleen followed me into the locker room as I changed into a fresh pair of scrubs and she changed out of her stale ones.

“How’re things with tall, dark and alpha male?” Joleen winked at me.

I smiled and shrugged. “Mostly just pure fun.” It was the truth and I didn’t mind admitting it.

“Got a ring on your finger yet?” Joleen grabbed my left hand and inspected. The question took me off guard a little bit and I jerked my hand away a l
ittle rougher than I intended.
She nodded and gave me a conspiratorial wink.

“That isn’t something either one of us is even thinking about, Joleen.”

She raised a brow. “Right. Have you
seen
him when he’s looking at you, Ava? That guy is one hundred percent in love with you. He’s not just having fun. You know that, right? He’s pissed a figurative circle around you.”

“That’s a lovely image.” I shrugged as I looped my stethoscope around my neck and shoved a couple of pens in my pocket. If I could make it through the shift without someone making off with either of them I’d consider myself lucky.

“It’s not something we talk about. Honest.” I held three fingers up in a Girl Scout salute.

“What
do
you talk about?”

I sank down on to the bench. I wasn’t in the mood for a heart-to-heart on the subject but Joleen always had a way of making me talk. She ought to go to work for the C.I.A.

“For the most part, we just like to
be,
you know? It’s kind of nice. It wasn’t like that the first time around. Things were fast and furious and intense. We’ve both been through so much ... it’s just easier for us to
not
talk about everything.”

Joleen shook her head as she sank down next to me. “So what you’re trying to say is that you’re both too busy fucking you don’t have time to talk about anything real. I gotta say, Ava, that’s not half bad as a relationship strategy. I ought to try that next time around.”

I nudged her hard with my elbow in jest, nearly knocking her off the end of the bench. The truth was, she wasn’t wrong. Sex had always been our default way of dealing with things. It was true thirteen years ago and it was even truer now. Dex had started asking me questions about Iraq. I asked him questions about the penitentiary. We gave each other pat answers and not five minutes later I went down on him. It had been easier to finish him off than the conversation.

“Fine.” Joleen put her hands up in surrender. “I won’t pry into your business anymore right now. As it happens, I’ve got a hot date of my own. I’ve been seeing a surgical intern.”

“An intern?” I said the word like it tasted bad in my mouth. “How old is he?”

Joleen shrugged. “Twenty-six, twenty-seven. He’s a friend of Chris’s.”

At the mention of Chris, we both went quiet for a second. I had about three missed calls from him and a half-dozen unanswered texts. He deserved better from me and I felt like shit for not being brave enough to give it to him. He was another hard subject I found it easier to just avoid altogether.

“You’ve got to talk to him,” Joleen said. “I know he wasn’t your boyfriend or anything. But he cares about you, Ava. You kind of left him hanging when Dex blew back into town.”

“I know.” I stood up and put my hands on Joleen’s shoulders, turning her so we both faced the locker room door. “I just don’t know what the hell I’m supposed to say to him.”

“How about the truth? Your ex is back and you aren’t quite finished with him yet. It’ll hurt like hell for him to hear that, but not as much as leaving him in the dark. If you hadn’t noticed, you seem to be a hard woman for men to get over. Must be rough.”

“Ouch.”

“It’s your lucky night,” Joleen said, holding the door open for me. “Chris is working the night shift at the pharmacy tonight. He takes lunch around ten. I told him to look you up.”

Joleen shot me a big, white-toothed smile and I could have punched her. She left me standing in the doorway with my mouth hanging open as she waved and sprinted for the exit.

“Traitor!” I called out as the automatic doors slid behind her.

***

Chris showed up, but it wasn’t until a few minutes before the end of my shift. I knew that wasn’t an accident. He likely hoped I’d have fewer options for excuses not to talk to him.
I had to at least give Joleen credit for giving me the heads up. It gave me a few minutes to figure out what to say. He was a sweet guy and Joleen was right. If Dex hadn’t come back, we’d probably be on our sixth or seventh date by now. Chris was cute in a Joseph Gordon-Levitt kind of way. He was the kind of guy I
should
be with, I supposed. Solid. Steady. Drama free. A pharmacist. If my parents were still around they would have loved him. But he wasn’t Dex. He eclipsed every other man in my life before or since and I was coming to the point where I was going to have to face that.

Chris smiled at me across the hall; his brown eyes shone and I swear he had a bona fide spring in his step when he came to the nurse’s station. We had a counter between us and I was glad for it. I would have stiffened when he reached out to hug me and it wasn’t fair.

“You have time to grab breakfast or some coffee?” Chris asked. God, he reminded me of a puppy and I felt like an asshole. He deserved so much better and Joleen had been right to give me a figurative kick in the ass about him.

Misty was working intake and she gave me a raised brow. We were positively dead tonight. I could have probably left for dinner and a show and not miss anything. “You can cut out now, if you want to,
Ava. We can cover for you
,” she said. I had a sinking feeling Joleen put her up to it and I turned and gave her side eye. She just smiled brighter.

“Give me five minutes to grab my purse and I’ll meet you over in the lounge. I can’t do breakfast today.” I would at least do him the courtesy of not making up some fake reason to say no.

Chris’s face fell but he didn’t let the smile leave his eyes. He gave me a salute and headed over to the lounge while I grabbed my things. I needed to make this as short and sweet as I could. He was such a nice guy and I knew whoever he
did
end up with was going to be one lucky girl. I didn’t know what would have happened if Dex hadn’t come back into town, but he did.

I took a breath as I came back out of the locker room and headed for the lounge. Chris’s face brightened again when he saw me. He came toward me, took my hands in his and gave me a peck on the cheek.

“You sure you don’t have time to grab some pancakes or something across the street?”

I shook my head. “Not today, Chris. And I’m sorry I’ve been so hard to get a hold of lately. I’ve been meaning to call you.”

“How about tonight?” he said. “Misty said you’re rotating off. There’s a new Chinese place over in Quail Hollow I’d like to take you to.”

“Chris,” I took another steadying breath. “Some things have been going on that I’ve been meaning to talk to you about. I feel like a huge jerk for waiting this long to do it. I just can’t see you outside of work right now.”

The smile finally left Chris’s eyes. Eager he was. Stupid he was not. Although he deserved to hear all of this from me, I was pretty sure the hospital gossip machine had filled him in on the broad strokes already.

“Yeah,” he said. “I was wondering when you were going to get around to this. The fact that you hadn’t kind of gave me hope it wasn’t something I needed to worry about. Your ex, that biker ex-con ... he got paroled or something, right?”

“He’s not an ex-con.” It seemed important to me to make him understand the distinction just then. “He was set up, Chris. He was exonerated. But, yes. He’s back in town and I’m trying to figure out where we stand. I’m sorry. I haven’t been fair to you and that’s my fault. You deserved to hear from me sooner than this. I just need to figure out what everything means.”

Chris nodded. “You don’t have to decide anything right now. I’m just asking for some equal time to prove my case.”

I had hoped he’d give up easier than that, even though a small part of me was flattered he didn’t. “Chris, it’s too complicated right now. I’m not going to string you along when you probably have ten other girls chomping at the bit for a phone call from you.”

He shook his head. “I thought I was being a lot less subtle than that. I’m not a one-night-stand kind of guy.”

His eyes raked over me and I knew he was in the middle of envisioning how I’d let him fuck me in the backseat of his Lexus as if we’d been on a prom date. It had seemed like a good idea at the time. Now I knew sleeping with Chris so soon had been a mistake. But how could I have known Dex would walk back into my life the very next day?

“I’m falling in love with you,” he said. “I’m good for you. And you can’t just let me in like that and then cut me off.”

“Chris, please, don’t. I’m really sorry. I wasn’t trying to lead you on and it wasn’t casual sex for me either. I had no idea things in my life were going to get complicated afterwards.”

“They don’t have to be complicated. I know you felt something with me.” Chris gave me a look that downright made me uncomfortable. I knew he was still imagining the things I’d done to him and let him do to me.

“I need to go now. I’m trying to be as nice about this as I know how to be. I
am
sorry. I’m just not ready to take things any further with you right now.”

He surprised me then. Nothing about Chris’s personality prepared me for what he did next. He crossed the distance between us and gripped me by the shoulders.

“He’s trash, Ava. I’ve asked around. You can’t honestly tell me you want to get mixed up with a bunch of thugs like that.” His grip on my shoulders started to hurt and he actually gave me a quick shake. “You really want everyone in town to think you’re some biker’s whore? Because that’s what they’re already saying about you. It makes me sick.”

“Chris.” I tried to pull away from him but he held me tight. His eyes flashed with anger and hurt and I couldn’t believe I’d misjudged his feelings on this so badly. I was also more than a little angry and took a breath to give him an earful, except I didn’t get the chance.

“I want you so bad, Ava. You drive me crazy just thinking about it. You can’t stand there and tell me that wasn’t one of the most wild nights you’ve ever spent. God. I dream about it. I can’t even look at you without getting hard all over again.”

He tried to kiss me then but Chris’s eyes went wide at something over my shoulder and a hand swooped down and gripped him by the arm.

Dex’s voice was low and quiet, but dripping with menace when he spoke. “Take your hands off her, you filthy little prick.” Dex gave him a solid shove and Chris let go of me.

Chris’s face went ash gray at first then color flushed back into his cheeks. Then he actually took a swing at Dex. I saw the punch coming almost in slow motion and I cringed, knowing how it would end.

Dex ducked and body slammed Chris against a pillar just near the exit doors.

“Dex,” I stepped forward and put light hand on his shoulder. Dex’s fingers twitched where he gripped Chris’s sleeve and he didn’t look at me. “Dex. I work here. Let’s just get the hell out of here, okay? Take me home.”

Dex let go of Chris. Chris snapped his lab coat back into place and narrowed his eyes at Dex. It occurred to me then that mild-mannered Chris the pharmacist might actually have a screw loose. He took another step toward Dex and shook a finger in his face.

“You’re nothing but a thug. You’re not good enough for her. She’s going to figure that out sooner or later. It’s gonna be too late then, Ava.” He glared at me; his face had gone so white his lips all but disappeared. “He’s gonna turn you into trash too. No guy’s going to want to touch you again after he’s finished with you.”

I tugged on Dex’s arm. He stood like a wall of granite but mercifully didn’t make another move on Chris. This was progress. Dex 2.0. A decade ago Chris wouldn’t have walked out of this with his facial bones in the same place.

“Go home, Chris,” I said. I pulled at Dex and after another tense moment, he finally came away with me. He walked ahead of me,
making me practically run to keep up with him as he stormed out into the parking lot. Was he so pissed he was planning to leave me here? I hadn’t done a single thing wrong. He climbed on his bike and revved the engine. I half expected him to tear off without me, but he waited. He was a brick wall of pent-up rage as I slid behind him and held on.

I wanted to shout to him not to make a bigger deal about Chris than necessary. He wasn’t even a former boyfriend. He was just someone I dated a couple of times. Dex knew I had a life before he rolled back into town. It’s what he’d told me to do when he pushed me out of his life all those years ago. Still, I hadn’t intended for my life to get thrown in his face quite like that.