Diary of a Blues Goddess (33 page)

Early the next morning, Red knocked on my bedroom door. Early as in eleven o'clock. Early for a musician.

"What's up?" I asked groggily as I opened my door.

"Shh," he whispered and walked into my room. "Tony let me in downstairs." He handed me a tiny velvet box.

"Oh my
God
," I squealed.

"Shh," he urged me again. I shut the door, and he sat down on the edge of my unmade bed. I opened the box. Inside, nestled in the velvet cushion, was an antique ring, platinum, set with a small diamond, and then surrounded by little diamonds in an old-fashioned setting.

"Where did you get it?"

"A friend of mine. He's got a fancy antique store. I've played at his Christmas party five years in a row, and his family's kind of fond of me. Got me a deal."

"It's beautiful."

"You really think so, Georgia?" He took out a crisp, white handkerchief and mopped his forehead. "I'm nervous."

Suddenly, I had intense panic that Nan might say no. What would
that
do for our night at the Mudslide? A woman going crazy over the men in her life, a recovering alcoholic bass player, a brokenhearted piano player and a drunken drummer. What a motley crew. I'd name us that, but that name was already taken. Actually, we took the name Georgia and the Whorehouse Blues in honor of the seance and that haunted house of ours.

As if he could read my mind, Red said, "I know it sounds crazy, me askin' her today of all days, but you know, I feel like you've given me some courage."

"Me?"

"Sure. You leavin' the Crescent City to make some
real
music. I haven't been this excited in years, sugar. So I figure it's time to get up the nerve. Who knows how much time any of us have left? Might as well spend it makin' the music we love, with the people we love."

Nan and Red were made for each other, and I just hoped she could see that. Funny how I could see how other people were meant for each other, but could never figure it out on my own.

"Good luck." I leaned down to kiss him. "If she says yes, can I call you Grandpa Red?" I winked at him. I had asked him once if he had any children and he said he had a daughter once, out of wedlock, but she had died when she was fourteen in a traffic accident. Another bit of pain he brought out at the piano. Her name had been Celia, and he wrote a song about her that I often heard him playing as I walked up the path to his front door.

"Nothing would make me prouder. You're my family anyway."

He stood up and took out his handkerchief again, mopping at the beads of sweat forming on his forehead. "Is it hot in here?"

"No. I have my fan on high, plus the air-conditioning. You're just nervous."

He stuck the handkerchief back into his pocket. "Suppose I am… "

I handed him back the ring box. "Good luck."

He smiled and opened the door and marched down the hall to Nan's room. He tapped gently on her door, and she opened it and invited him in. As soon as they shut the door, I ran down the hall to Dominique's room, which stood on the same side of the hall. One of her walls shared the wall of Nan's sitting room. I knocked softly.

"Come in," she answered.

"Got a glass?" I asked hurriedly as I walked in. Dominique was sewing a lost button on a Dior blouse.

"Over on the table there." She stopped sewing.

"I'm eavesdropping."

"What?"

"On Nan."

"Now
this
I have to see. What is that old glass thing a James Bond trick? And why are you eavesdropping?" Can't say.

"You come in here with crazy bed-head hair, in a T-shirt with no underwear on… I can see your ass cheeks poking out, honey. And you want to listen in on your poor almost-eighty grandma and you won't tell me why?"

I tugged my T-shirt down farther. "Red is asking Nan to marry him."

"Holy shit!" she said, flinging the blouse aside and leaping up, grabbing a glass and coming next to me. We held our glasses to the wall, but the voices on the other side, despite our nifty "spying" technique, were muffled.

"Can you hear anything?" she whispered.

"No, Mata Hari, I can't… " I walked over to her bed and sat down on it. "I guess we'll have to wait until they tell us."

She sat down next to me. "Borrow my robe, Pussy Galore," she handed me a pink chiffon number. "You look terrible. Still sad about Rick the Prick?"

"Not really. Maggie and Jack." I slid an arm into the robe, then the other arm. "Did you know they were seeing each other?"

"Uh-huh. But I figured after the Casanova thing, you didn't need to hear about it. Certainly an attack of the crazies around here."

I nodded. "Maggie is pissed off at yours truly. She knows about Jack and me. And I don't blame her for being mad. I really don't. But she says she's not coming tonight."

Dominique wrapped an arm around my shoulders. "I'm sorry. She'll come. I'll talk to her."

"Don't. The whole thing is messy enough."

"So what does that mean? That I can't fix it? I'll have you know I'm very good at fixing relationships."

I rolled my eyes. "What about the Lady Brett fiasco?" One time Dominique tried to repair things between Lady Brett and her boyfriend, an Italian who called himself Fabio. Before the whole thing was over, thanks to Dominique, three cop cars were called to break up a dish-breaking scream-fest of epic and histrionic proportions.

"All right. But what about the time I helped Maggie with her boyfriend the fireman?"

"Sure… you got them back together for a whole twenty-four hours, but before the week was out, she needed a restraining order on him."

Dominique held up her hands. "Fine. I'll butt out… So what else is bothering you? You nervous about tonight? Things okay with your dad?"

"Yes and yes… Look… what do you think of Tony?"

"I'd do him in a heartbeat if I thought he was gay."

"Really? Like him more than Clooney?"

"I just may. You
know
a woman can't resist the charms of a brogue. He's been in the band for years now, but he's quiet. He's not the flashy lead singer, or the dream-boat guitarist. He's the bassist who holds you all together."

"Gary holds us together."

"No, Gary tries to control you." Sometimes a queen can make a lot of sense. She continued. "Tony is the quiet one, the one who is there to make sure you all get along smoothly. He's the one who runs out and buys you chocolate when you've had a bad day. He's the one who sleeps on a deck chair on the riverboat when Jack has a girl, even though Tony's bed is nice and warm and has a pillow. He's easy to overlook, but underneath that quietness I would bet is one very intense, very fuckable guy."

"You think?" I arched an eyebrow.

"Oh yeah… haven't you
noticed
those biceps of his? Those hands? That delicious ass?"

"I hadn't… until he came to stay here. Dominique…I'm a mess. I don't know
what
I want."

"Oh yes you do."

I looked at her. She was so confident. "You do," she said firmly.

"You think?"

She nodded. "So you sing your heart out tonight, sister, and then you go for what you want. It's your time. It's just your time."

We heard a loud whoop and holler from the next room. Next we heard pretty spry footsteps from Red, who stuck his head out in the hall and called me, "Georgia!"

"Come on." I grabbed Dominique's hand. We ran into the hall. Red gave us a big thumbs-up.

"Champagne coming up!" Dominique ran down the stairs, and I hugged Red and went in to see Nan admiring her hand with her new engagement ring on it.

"Isn't it beautiful, Georgia?" She held her hand out.

"Wonderful." I leaned down to kiss her. "I am so happy for you. You deserve it, Nan."

Red just paced the room, beaming. "This is the best day of my life."

Dominique returned with the champagne and four flutes expertly balanced from her bartending days, and she popped the cork and filled our glasses.

"To Nan and Red," I said. "Two beautiful people with a beautiful life ahead of them."

"Cheers, darlings," Dominique said, and her eyes were welled up. She cries at happy occasions. She cries at sad occasions. She's an equal-opportunity crier.

"Cheers!" Red toasted me in turn. "And to our blues goddess, Georgia Ray, may she blow away the citizens of New Orleans tonight."

We drank our champagne. Nan held on to Red's hand. After we finished our bottle, Dominique said, "I'm still repairing my outfit for tonight. Off I go, darlings. See you at the 'Slide tonight."

"See you tonight, Dominique." I smiled.

"Well… I hate to say goodbye so soon to my fiancee, the soon-to-be Mrs. Watson, but I've got to warm up for tonight." He leaned down and kissed her goodbye tenderly. "I love you, Myra."

"I love you too, Red."

He kissed my cheek. "See you at the 'Slide."

"See you tonight." I held up my hand, and he high-fived me. "Love conquers all," I said.

"Spoken like one who knows." He winked.

Nan and I were alone, and I lifted my glass again. "You know, I don't know if I've ever thanked you for all you've done for me. You've given me a home and you've taught me the real meaning of family."

"Georgia… you are my
raison d'etre
."

"I'm very happy for you and Red. Thrilled, really."

"So why didn't you tell me that you were going to leave us when the garden is finished?"

"Red told you, huh?"

"Yes. And he and your father are cookin' to go off and make some music together, too. There's some club owner from Chicago who wants him to play there for a few weeks… The last of the great bluesmen." She sighed. "When did we get old?"

"You're not old. Just wise. How do you feel about him doing that?"

"I feel like I'll miss him and your father… and you. Feel like it's about time you spread your wings."

"Yeah, but—"

"Georgia, we all like to think the rest of the world would stop if we left. That we're the only one shouldering all the burdens, all the blues. I know you. What you think. That the Saints would perish without you. That I would fall apart. That Dominique and I wouldn't be able to go on. But you know, the most freeing thing in the world can be to discover that, indeed, life goes on without us. It can be humbling and freeing both at once."

"So how'd you get so smart?"

"Many years. Many heartaches. Many joys. Perhaps I am a Buddhist at heart. But the wheel goes around. It turns, with us or without us."

"Like Honey Walker?"

"Like Honey Walker."

"She didn't leave because she hated you. She didn't leave because of the way this city treated her. That pained her, but she left because she was Sadie's lover and staying in this house made her too sad."

"I carried a pain in my insides for so long that maybe I had made her leave, but I didn't. She just had to go. And in the end, all these years she's been wandering these halls, reunited with Sadie… and your mother."

I nodded.

"Life sure is strange, Georgia. Just when you think you've got it all figured out, it puzzles you."

"Does it make you feel weird, thinking about them being here in the house? Mom here?"

"No. It makes me feel very content. And I suppose when Red and I die, we'll come back here and haunt you, too. We'll just all be here until then it's your children, and your children's children. Our lineage will stretch out like an endless thread. And we'll all be together. Now, isn't that a nice thought?"

I watched her, silent for a while. I could see her mind piecing together bits of scraps like a quilt, putting it all together until she had the entire picture. Finally, she nodded decisively. "Yes. I think that's how it will be. You know, if I had maybe had half a brain, I would have figured it out. About Sadie and Irene. It was there in front of me all along."

Which made me think of Tony.

"Nan… speaking of something right there in front of you… "

"Tony."

I stopped marveling at her powers of intuition. She knew me better than I knew myself.

"Yes," I said. "It seems so obvious now. To me. We've been so close all this time. But at the same time, kind of quiet, you know?"

"Maybe that's it. Not that you can't talk to each other, but that you don't need to. That you understand the spaces in between the words. The silences. The music."

"It is in the silences that I feel like I know him best. We just seem to understand. Yet, when we do talk, it's very nice, too. But it's so strange that now, after all this time, we've connected in this way."

"Sometimes you just have to wait for the music to move you." She smiled, sounding an awful lot like Red.

"Maybe… let's talk about you and Red. When's the wedding?"

"Before you all leave. In the garden."

"But then I'll be off to New York."

"Don't I have a suitcase? Dominique can hold down the fort here. I won't come right away, but I'll head up to the Big Apple this summer. Red and I can take it as an extended honeymoon."

"Were you surprised? By the ring?"

She clasped her hands, "Yes, I was. And if a man can surprise you at
my
age, then it's a good idea to keep him. Does Tony surprise you?"

"Yes. But I am starting to question whether I have the slightest idea what I'm doing. I thought I loved Rick, too, you know."

"Sweetheart, if we had it all figured out, life wouldn't be very interesting."

I stood up. "If I'm going to sing tonight, I better try to do something with this hair of mine. I can't believe I'm actually going on. With my father."

"He's a good man, Georgia. He's had some hard times, but he sees now he needs his family."

"You're not angry with him?"

"If we stayed angry at every person who hurt us, we'd be mad at the world, Georgia. Loving people means getting hurt. That simple."

"Thanks, Nan."

"What are you wearing?"

"The black Valentino dress Dominique found for me in New York. She said the guy running the thrift store had no idea what he had. It was just in a box in a corner. She bought it so fast her hands were shaking when she pulled the money out. Too small for her, but just right for me. And not a sequin in sight."