Diary Of A Pissed Off Wife (2 page)

This bitch was crazy as shit. At this point I don’t care if Travis fucked her on the JumboTron, this bitch was going after my babies?

“Really, you don’t have anything better to do with your time? I could care less about you or your little fantasy world.” That’s right Jane don’t let this bitch know she’s getting to you. These things can scent blood.

I was of a mind to believe Travis, but even if he was lying, I’d spent the night thinking about this shit from all angles, and no way was I gonna roll over and play dead, fuck that.

“You know, I feel sorry for older women like you. You know, the ones who want to hang on even after the shine has faded. Why don’t you do us all a favor and accept your fate? My Travis doesn’t want to be saddled with your old pussy any more. He’s found a newer and much prettier model.”

Take a deep breath Jane. This is you and your family’s happiness at stake here. Don’t crumble; don’t weaken. I wanted to crawl into a hole and die, but I couldn’t. I couldn’t
let my babies go through this shit.

Please don’t let Travis be lying. I said that little prayer before I fortified myself and went in. I had decided on the course I would take if I chose to engage.

Travis wanted nothing to do with it. He thinks telling me to ignore it, will just make this shit go away. Now if this twit was lying, then she had serious issues. Who knows why she’d singled me out? Either way, it was my problem to deal with.

“
I've been married for almost twenty years, we got married young. I've built a life with my husband, the life we vowed to each other before God and man. You want to come and build on my foundation little girl? Are you insane? I would straight up twat punch your ass into next week.” Click. Your move bitch.

I had a lot of shit to think about. I had to go into protection mode. I have to protect my kids, protect myself, and protect my marriage; if I had one left. It’s been a long time since I had to play the badass. Not since we started dating back in high school and all the little hoochies were on my man’s dick.

I knew it wouldn’t end there
, and I knew I was in a fight for my life. Someway, somehow, this person had found me. If Travis wasn’t a lying ass snake and she was making it up, then what the hell did she want with me?

And was it even worth it to do this back and forth shit? I couldn’t call her back, couldn’t find out who she was by using reverse phone look-up because her number was blocked.

I tried going through my usual morning routine and not letting my kids know that there was anything wrong. The youngest was only four, poor baby, and he was still having separation issues every time he went out the door to Pre K.

I kept looking at them
, trying to imagine them not being in my life. Imagining some other woman getting them ready for school in the morning and kissing my husband goodbye. That shit pissed me the fuck off. Now I really wanted this bitch to call back.

She called not ten minutes after I got the kids off to the school bus. “Oh, you’re still there, I thought for sure you’d be packing by now.” I laughed at her ass because she was stupid.

“Are you fuck stupid or just ignorant? Let me get this straight. You think I'm going to uproot mine and my children's lives; move into a three- bedroom apartment, so you can live in my seven million dollar mansion with my husband? Bitch is you crazy?”

She started breathing hard on the other line; I guess I was getting to her. “It doesn’t matter what you say, it is what it is.”

“What the fuck does that stupid shit even mean? Listen you little twat, I have better things to do with my day, like fucking my husband as soon as he comes through the door…”

“Hahahaha, we had a good laugh about that, he says you’re not even good at it. Says I’m the best he ever had.” Okay that hurt, but I had to remind myself that maybe she was lying
, and just trying to get a rise out of me for whatever fucked up reason. Two can play this game.

“
My husband fucked you?”

“Of course, many times.”

Did he eat the coochie first? How long did he last?”

“Five or ten minutes, who cares?” Now she was getting huffy.

“You got jipped.”

I guess I pissed her off because she slammed down the phone in my ear. Ten seconds later my messages started chiming away like crazy. I looked down at my cell phone and saw picture after picture of Travis with some little blonde.

Now the pictures themselves weren’t incriminating. They weren’t naked or anything like that. But he was there, and he was smiling. I saw red. The last caption said, ‘oh by the way I was in your house, fucked him in your bed. First thing I’m gonna do is get rid of that old fashion Chippendale shit. I’m more into iron bars, you know, so he can tie me up.’ And a smiley face. Gutted.

I tore around my house like a crazy person. Cleaning shit that didn’t need to be cleaned, emptying out the fridge for no damn reason. My mind wasn’t sure if to shut down, or spiral out of control. I wanted to call my girls, but I was afraid to. If this got out, if I talked about it, it would make it more real.

How the fuck did she know what type of furniture I had? And who the fuck is she? She didn’t look familiar, not from around here. How was I going to deal with Travis now? If I kill him my babies will be without their mama. How was he going to explain this away so that I believed him?

Fear threatened to take hold of me but I fought it back. Then I went after the wine bottle. I knew this shit was a bad idea but I needed it. Travis could take care of the kids when they got home later, because I was about to get plastered.

He came through the door whistling
, two hours later. I was waiting for him. His little trick hadn’t called back and I had a full head of steam. There wasn’t going to be any fucking going on in here this time. If anybody was gonna get fucked, it was America’s golden boy.

“Jane what…what’re you doing?” He came up short and his eyes went wide. I guess that’ll happen when a drunken woman pointed a gun at your goods.

"Balls to the wall Travis you fucked up."

"But I didn't..."

"Uh, uh, uh, before you lie...she sent pictures.”

“Pictures
, what pictures?” He looked totally befuddled.

I slid my p
hone over for him to get a looksee.

“This is nothing, we were…” I got up to face him and he backed off.

“Let me ask you something. Did you forget who you married? You think because we've been together all these years and I had your children that I stopped being that girl? I can see you remember.

Now let me tell you how it's gonna be. First off
, you're not going anywhere. When I said 'til death do us part I meant it, so get that shit outta your head if you were even thinking about it. You try walking out on my kids it would be the easiest twenty anybody ever spent in prison." I scratched my thigh with my glock as his eyes followed the movement and he swallowed.

“Baby calm down I can explain
; this is perfectly innocent. I don’t know why Tiffany…”

“Is that that bitch’s name? who is she?”

“She’s one of the girls on the squad, we’re just friends, not even that we just…”

“Save it you lying piece a shit. She told me all about it.”

“Jane, I don’t know why she’s doing this, but nothing happened. Come on, you should know me better than that. You know that’s not the kind of man I am.”

“I don’t know shit you cocksucker.” Whew I should get sloshed more often, it really loosens up the tongue. “You have some serious thinking to do, because this shit right here ends today.
Whether it ends with you in a pine box, or in our bed tonight, is up to you.”

“Where are you going?”

“I’m going to call my girls, I’ve got shit to do. This bitch live here in town?”

“I don’t know where she lives.” I watched him closely to see if he was lying or not.

"Oh by the way, call the exterminator."

"What for, wasn't he just here?" He was looking all sorts of perplexed.

"That bitch said she was in my house
, I need him to check for fleas."

"Nobody was in this house what..."

"I'm supposed to believe you? Call him."

I probably shouldn't have bitched so much when they took all the soaps off the TV. Fuck
, now I'm living my own. Be careful what you wish for.

I went to our room and blasted David Guetta’s Titanium. I was getting myself pumped for this bitch. He must’ve been feeling brave because he followed me not long after.

“Baby please, stop this. I’ll talk to the girl and find out what’s going on. Maybe there’s some kind of misunderstanding…”

“Misunderstanding, what kind of misunderstanding would that be? She forgot which dick she fell on?” He hung his head and shook it.

"Princess I didn't sleep with her, it was just conversations."

"Conversation? Was your phone broke?"

He looked at me with a puzzled frown on his face.

"No why?"

"If you were lonely, and needed someone to talk to, you have a perfectly cognizant wife who was here lonely and needing conversation too. I ought to just punch you in your face."

He tried talking
, but I sung over his ass, I was done. He might’ve started this shit by being stupid, but I was about to end it; and that bitch wasn’t going to be smiling when I was done.

“In these conversation
s, what were they about?”

“Nothing serious, just shit about her life and stuff like that. She wants to go back to school a
nd I was trying to talk her into going back. I never gave her any reason to believe that there was anything more going on but just straight up conversation. You can ask the guys they’d vouch for that.”

“What
, your team mates? Like I’ll believe them.”

“So what are you planning to do now
? And will you turn that shit off and talk to me?”

“Ladies, when your man wanna get buck-wild just throw back and hit him up style.” I broke out the Blue Cantrell on his ass.

“Me?
I’m gonna get my girls together, then I’m going shopping, because even if you didn’t fuck that bitch, you spent time with her that belonged to me. I’m spending thousands big boy, you better make sure my card is straight.” I’m not the shopping type, most of my jewelry and shit, he bought. I usually just spend money on the kids, but this shit calls for retail therapy.

“Oh and another thing, you said you’d talk to the girl. That’s a no-no
, you have nothing more to say to her or your ass will answer to me. I got this. You hear ME Travis Shackelford?”

“I understand that you’re pissed
, but watch your fucking mouth when you’re talking to me. Don’t forget who the fuck You married.” I guess he forgot I was the one with the gun. Just to remind him I twirled it around my finger.

“That shit don’t scare me. I’m not about to be taken out to the shed for some shit I didn’t do
, so get that shit outta your crazy ass head.” He tried advancing on me but I was ready for his ass. One shot to the ceiling.

Oh shit. “Travis
, get off.” This crazy ass man knocked the gun out of my hand. “I told you right? Now you need to calm the fuck down and let me try to figure out what the fuck this is all about, instead of going off all half cocked.”

“No, that bitch started this
, I’m about to end it. You didn’t want to talk about it last night and now she’s calling me on a daily basis. SHE THREATENED TO TAKE MY BABIES.”

“She what?”

“That’s right, your rot crotch bitch said she was gonna play mom to my kids. I’ll put both your asses in the morgue before I see that happen. Now get the fuck off of me. I gotta call Jilessa.”

“Oh shit baby, not Jilessa.” I
smirked at him; I know he knows what calling Jilessa and getting her involved meant. Whoever this Tiffany was, whatever game she was playing, she’d bitten off more than she could chew.

Now
was a good time to break out the tears, my hubby cannot stand to see me cry. “I need to do this baby, she threatened my womanhood. How would you feel if the shoe was on the other foot?” He flinched like I’d hit him.

He rested his head on my shoulder. “Why the fuck is this happening? I only had like three conversations with this chick. There were other people around the whole time. Nothing ever happened, I never even touched her fucking hand.”

“It’s okay baby, not to worry.” I believed him, he can’t look me in the eye when he lies, so I know he was telling me the truth. Good. With that settled it was on.

Funn
ily enough, I had more fight in me now that I knew that he hadn’t fucked her. Somehow I felt more empowered.

“Babe, go shopping, buy whatever you want
, but please don’t get your crew involved in this.”

“Sorry babe, I have to.
They’re my backup; you passed the baton when you told me to ignore this shit. Besides, this is women’s work.”

“What do you plan to do?”

“Nothing too illegal, not to worry. Make sure the kids do their homework and eat their dinner. Maybe you should order pizza for dinner. This might take a while.” I got up and checked my phone again, looking at the pictures she’d sent.

It wouldn’t take much to find out her last name and shit now that I knew she was on the cheerleading squad.