Dirty Shame (Bluefield Bad Boys #1) (8 page)

Chapter 13

Kellan

Tommy’s truck was gone. He’d mentioned something about driving into the city to get some car parts for a tune-up. Dawson’s jeep was still sitting on the gravel patch in front of the cabin. Max greeted us on the front porch. The dog followed us through the open door and headed straight to the kitchen where he’d left the remnants of his rawhide for an early afternoon gnaw session.

Dawson walked out of his bedroom just as I stepped inside. Rylan was behind me. Fortunately, he’d taken the time to pull on his jeans. “Guess who showed up at The Hole after you left.” Dawson started right in on a conversation, not realizing anyone was behind me. I was about to stop him, worried that he’d blurt out some woman’s name. But he talked right over me as he buttoned up his fly. “Jigsaw came in and he was looking for and I quote ‘the filthy coal-coated fucker who he wanted to fight again but with a less crooked ref in the ring’.” He finally sealed shut his mouth when Rylan stepped out from behind me. He recovered quickly. “Hey, Merritt, long time no see. You’re looking fine as always. Good to see the twenties haven’t caused too much havoc on your looks.”

“Thanks, Dawz, the twenties have been good to you too.” Her curious expression shifted my direction. “So, are you the coal-coated fucker? And who the heck is Jigsaw?” She paused. “Wait. Are you two guys involved with that shady back room fight scene that Becky told me about?”

Dawson and I didn’t answer.

“Of course you are. Silly question. Let me see, Jigsaw is someone who breaks his opponents into pieces?”

“Good guess.”

“Yeah, well that darn English degree comes in handy every once in awhile.”

“Anyhow.” I looked at Dawson and decided a quick topic change was needed. “Dawz, don’t you have to go out and do that—that thing today?”

Dawson shot me a questioning look. “What thing?” One look from me cued him into my meaning. “Oh yeah, right, that thing over at that place.” He pointed toward the kitchen. “I’ll just go to this place first and get some coffee. Then I can go do that thing.” He scrubbed his hair back and headed toward the kitchen. “Or you could just tell me to get the hell out of the cabin,” he muttered.

“K. Dawz, get the hell out,” I said as he disappeared into the kitchen.

Rylan walked over to the front window. It was hazy from dust. But that wasn’t unusual in this town. Her tawny brown hair was pulled into a long ponytail for the ride on my bike.

“I vaguely remember the old guy who lived here. He used to raise his fist and cuss a lot,” she said.

“Yep, Oscar the Grouch.”

“I always figured he was just super lonely, and that was why he was so grumpy.”

“Or maybe he was lonely because he was grumpy. Guess it’s the whole chicken and egg thing.”

Rylan laughed. “Good point.” She picked up a piece of petrified wood I’d found out on a hike. “This is neat.”

I walked up behind her, close enough to see the small diamond stud in her ear and breathe in the scent of her shampoo. But I didn’t touch her. Yet. I’d been working hard on control. There was nothing I wanted more than to have Rylan naked in my arms. I wanted her so badly that I was sure once I started, I wouldn’t be able to stop. I needed to be sure she wanted it as much as me. She’d just gone through a shitty break-up, and the last thing I wanted was to scare her off by coming on too strong.

Dawson finished the clamor in the kitchen and walked back through to his room. Rylan turned around. We were face to face and just inches apart. Heat and energy filled the narrow space between us. The thin spray of freckles on her nose nearly melted my resolve. That was how it was with Rylan. Something as innocent as her freckles or the way she pursed her lips in thought could make me nuts with wanting her.

She reached her hand up to push my hair back off my face. As her fingers grazed my skin, I closed my eyes.

“I can feel that through my entire body,” I said quietly. “I think it’s because I spent so much damn time daydreaming about you touching me. About me touching you.”

“Oh?” Without warning she pressed herself against me. “And what else were we doing in those daydreams?”

“All kinds of dirty stuff. I should be totally ashamed but I’m not.” There was no way to have her pressed against me without touching her. My hands dipped under her sweater and smoothed over the silky skin on her back. It was all I needed. She smiled as my cock pushed against my fly. “Dawz, get the fuck out!” I yelled.

I kissed her lips, and she mewled sweetly against my mouth.

Dawson stomped down the hallway. “I’m taking Max with me.”

“Good idea,” I said without taking my eyes off Rylan.

“You should put a necktie on the door or something, otherwise Tommy’s gonna come back and—”

“Don’t have a tie,” I said impatiently. “Get out.”

Dawson walked over to the couch. We watched with frustrated amusement as he dug through the couch cushions. He yanked out a necktie. “Nina likes to be tied up,” he explained. He tossed the tie onto the coffee table and walked out.

Rylan burst out laughing. “He’s still the same hugely entertaining character as always.”

“Yeah, he’s a clown. Now, I’d say let’s move this to the couch, but after he pulled that damn tie out from the cushions, I’m thinking I might never sit on it again.”

“We could skip the middle section of this story and go straight into the bedroom.” The sultry expression that came with her suggestion made every muscle in my body tense with wanting her.

“Darlin’, I’ve got to warn you, I’m getting so fucking wound up right now—”

She curled her hand around my neck. “Well, what can we do to relieve the pressure? You know, Kellan, I’m not that same inexperienced, semi-shy teenage girl anymore.”

“I know, and trust me, I’m already fighting with my own demons about wanting to rip apart any other guy who dared to touch you in the last seven years.”

“Did you expect me to wait for you?”

“Damn fucking right I expected it. You are mine, Lanie. You’ve always been mine. Even when you were four states away, you were mine.”

Her eyes glossed with tears as I took hold of her hand and pressed it against my chest. “You’ve been right here all along. Mine always and forever. Sorry if I sound like some fucking obsessed luna—”

She threw her arms around my neck and her lips flew to mine.

Chapter 14

Rylan

I could feel the energy, the ferocity, and with his size and strength, I should’ve been terrified. But I was feeling the opposite of fear. My own longing matched his. I wanted Kellan. It was entirely possible that any time I’d had sex with another man I’d been thinking of Kellan. How the hell had he managed that? How the hell had he managed to possess me like that?

He kicked the bedroom door shut behind us. For a second, the look in his blue eyes made me shrink back. Was I ready for this? Was I ready to give myself completely to the man who had owned me, heart and soul, since I was a teenage girl, a girl too young and naïve to understand what real passion was? Seven years ago, we’d kissed and fooled around like clumsy, inexperienced, hormone flooded teens. Even then, Kellan had been far more experienced and confident than me, but he’d still been nothing compared to the man with the hungry gaze staring at me, looking at me as if he’d just as soon devour me as take me to bed.

Kellan closed the gap between us in two urgent steps. Before I could utter another word or take a clean breath, he had my sweater up and off. He tossed it over to the lopsided dresser that had a drawer missing on the bottom. A shiver pulsed through me.

“Are you cold?” The hitch in his deep voice sent another tremble through my body. It was the sound of a man working hard to stay in control.

“It’s not the cold.” My own voice sounded weak as a whisper. “It’s the way you’re looking at me.”

An expression that seemed somewhere between hurt and concerned fell across his handsome face. I could see the muscles in his jaw twitching and his Adam’s apple moving each time he swallowed. “Lanie, say you want this or we can walk out of this room right now. Cuz I’ve got to warn you, I want this so fucking bad right now, I’m going out of my mind with thinking about it. Thinking about you. Seven fucking years of thinking about you is a long damn time.” He was not the type of man who would shake or show the slightest fear in even the scariest situation. I’d seen that courage in him as a teen and I could sense that the steel hard man in front of me was even more fearless now. Yet, I was sure I saw his muscles, his entire body twitching with emotion.

My throat tightened. “We can’t go back to the past, Kellan. I don’t know where any of this is going. I’m afraid to feel like I did when I left here. It hurt like hell. You hurt me, and it was a pain I never want to know again.”

His eyes flickered with disappointment. He swallowed hard again.

I took a deep breath. “But I want this, Kellan. I need this. I need to feel wanted again.”

He moved so fast, I missed it with one blink. His arms went around me. I could still sense that he was holding back, working hard to keep from crushing me in his arms. My bra fell to the ground, but I hadn’t even felt him touch the clasp. I kicked off my shoes, and he pushed my jeans to the floor. My panties slid down behind them. I was naked. I’d never stood like that, completely naked, in front of him.

He stepped back, only for a second, and the way he looked at me made heat surge through my body. All he’d done was gaze at me, and suddenly, all I could think about was him buried deep inside of me.

He reached up and pressed his hand against the side of my face. He hadn’t touched me anywhere else. The anticipation coupled with the heated, pulsing energy coming from his body was making me nearly lightheaded. “No condom, Lanie. Don’t ask it of me. With others,” he said the words quickly as if they might mean less that way, “I always use them. But I can’t.” His words caught in his throat. “I can’t put anything between us. I have to feel you, all of you.”

Tears rolled down my cheeks. It was seven years of emotion, seven years of confusion and love and hate and desire all rolled up into one moment in time, and I was overwhelmed by it all. By him. By how strong our feelings had remained through time and separation.

He reached back and pulled off his shirt. The black ink on his arm flashed by as he tossed away his shirt. The tattoo. I hadn’t seen it since that night. I walked to his side. He stood with his fists balled, another mechanism of control that only served to make my pussy even wetter. I ran my fingers over the tattoo. He’d attempted to cover it with a geometric pattern but the letters were still clear. He didn’t say a word about it as I touched each letter. The muscles in his arms and shoulders contracted as he curled his fists even tighter.

I placed my mouth against the ink and kissed his arm. “Take me, Kellan.” The words came out on a faint whisper.

My feet left the wood floor as rock hard arms swept me up. He lowered me, none too gently, onto the bed. I stretched out naked beneath his predatory gaze. His eyes did not leave me as he unbuttoned his fly and pushed his pants down. His cock stood straight out, hard, thick and slick with moisture. I moved my hand and wrapped my fingers around him.

He grunted and took hold of my wrist. “No,” he said between breaths. “I’m already close to coming just looking at you. He knelt on the mattress and stared at my pussy as his hand smoothed up my thigh. His fingers curled through the moisture pooling between the folds of my pussy and a moan of pleasure fell from my lips.

“That’s it, baby. I need to hear you.” He leaned over and pressed his mouth against my pussy. “I need to taste you,” he muttered against the tender folds.

He settled between my legs. He spread me wide with his callused fingers and flicked his tongue over my clit. I cried out and found myself instinctually writhing against the pressure of his mouth. My fingers curled in his hair, gripping him, wanting to feel even more than his mouth had to offer. He stroked me with his tongue and thumb, bringing me as close to the edge as possible without me coming apart into a million glittering pieces.

“I could die right here between your thighs and die a happy man, baby.”

He lifted up to his knees, taking his mouth from my pussy and leaving me at the sharp cliff of an orgasm. “God, Kellan, please.” I reached for him. He answered my plea.

He felt massive and powerful as he lowered himself over me. His hand pressed against my cheek as he gazed down at me. “I have to see your face when you come, baby. I have to be looking at you.” With that he slid his hand beneath my ass. His cock pushed against my aching pussy, teasing me mercilessly.

I grabbed hold of his arms. “Please, Kellan.” My eyes drifted shut as he filled me.

“God, Lanie, you’re so hot, so beautiful, so fucking tight. Just how I imagined you’d feel. My perfect fit. My match. You were meant to be mine and only mine.” His words were strained as he moved faster and harder against me. My eyes fluttered open. His blue eyes gazed at me with a mix of erotic need and love. We were together. He was locked inside of me in every way, and all of it felt so real. Tears fell from my eyes as my pussy tightened in ecstasy around him.

He continued to move inside of me, stroking every inch of me with his cock. He leaned down and kissed away a tear with his mouth. “Are you all right, baby?”

“Yes,” I said on a breath.

“Holy shit, Lanie, how did I last these seven years without you?” His final words were edged with anger, but it wasn’t toward me. It was directed at someone else, at something else. Those demons he’d mentioned, possibly. I might never know, and maybe that was for the best.

The bed chirped against the wall as his movements increased in speed and strength. Every blow was pure, sweet agony. My pussy still ached with the orgasm, and it seemed every movement stirred up the same sensations. I wrapped my legs around his waist to take in more of him. He responded by pushing against me harder, filling me to my very core. It had never felt this right with anyone else. With Chase it had been sex. With Kellan it was sex, passion, desire and a connection that I felt so deeply it made my entire body ache.

The hard muscles in his arms tensed beneath my hands as he thrust inside of me one last time. “Fuck,” he growled. He stayed there over me, gazing down at me as our breathing slowed and the spinning in my head vanished. He kissed me again. “I don’t want to leave. I could just stay here, like this, inside of you, forever.”

He lowered himself onto the bed and pulled me into his arms. I kissed his chest and ran my fingers over the hard muscles and ink on his arm. The ink that spelled out my nickname, the name he’d given me.

I reached down and pulled the blanket up over us and curled into his warmth. It was always bittersweet with Kellan. I was in pure paradise lying naked in his arms. But there was always the ache that uncertainty of the future brought with it. Nothing about our relationship had ever been easy, and, it seemed, things weren’t much different now.

I pushed the sad thoughts from my head and snuggled against him. “I seem to recall that I was promised a grilled cheese sandwich for lunch.”

“I guess I did make that promise. You hungry?”

“Famished. But first, I want to stay curled in your arms just a little longer.”