Authors: Colleen Coble
Kaia couldn’t speak.
Faye sent Kaia a beseeching look. “What really made the change was finding Jesus. I felt clean and new again. Happy for the first time in years.” She took a deep breath. “Except for one thing. I knew I had to try to make right the wrong I’d done here.”
Kaia couldn’t move, couldn’t breathe. She didn’t want to hear this. She shut her eyes, but the other woman’s voice continued inexorably.
“It’s you I wronged, Kaia. You and Bane and Mano.”
Kaia opened her eyes again and stared at the woman she knew and yet didn’t know.
Faye glanced at Kaia’s grandfather. “And
Makuakane
. I wronged him terribly, as well as
Makuahine
.”
Father and Mother.
Kaia felt frozen in time with each minute moving by like a sea turtle on land. Her gaze went to her grandfather. She didn’t want to believe it.
He nodded. “Faye is your mother. Paie.”
Faye
in the Hawaiian language was
Paie
. Why had she never thought about that? Kaia knew Faye had grown up here yet had never questioned her name. She couldn’t breathe, couldn’t think. Her brain felt like poi.
Jesse reached over and took her hand. His strong fingers gripping hers gave her the comfort she needed. She clung to his hand with all the desperation she felt. Her gaze went back to Faye. In the pictures she’d seen of her mother, Paie was wearing Hawaiian attire, and she looked very different in her perfectly tailored linen shorts and beige top, so unlike the colorful clothing in the pictures. But focusing on Paie’s face, she saw some of her own features staring back at her.
“Why have none of your friends recognized you?” she asked. She almost didn’t know her own voice. It was hoarse and strained.
“I’ve pretty much kept to the house except on outings with Heidi. I tried not to go places where I might run into old friends.”
Faye held out her arms. Kaia knew she should be feeling something—anger, joy, something. But she felt only cold and empty. Mechanically, she rose and went into Faye’s arms. But the touch of her arms made her feel even colder.
She pulled away quickly. “Why are you here?”
“I want you to forgive me, Kaia. I’m so sorry for leaving you and your brothers. I can’t make any excuses because there are none. I was blind and willful.”
“Forgive you?” Kaia turned the words over in her mind.
“Yes, I want to make it up to you. Can we be friends first and maybe feel our way to a deeper relationship?”
Friends. Her
mother
wanted to be friends with her. The pain was more than she could bear. She wanted a mother to love her, not a friend. “You walk out and leave us orphaned and then expect to just pick up twenty-five years later like you’d just taken a little walk?” She stood and clenched her hands together. “My real mother was my
tûtû
. She was there to teach me to braid my hair. She was there the day I learned to swim, when my first tooth fell out, when I had my first date. How dare you come back now and want to be my
friend
!”
The betrayal gathered and built until she felt she would burst from the pressure. She whirled and faced her grandfather. “How long have you known about this?” she demanded.
“She came to me just minutes before you arrived,” her grandfather said, his tone slow and measured. “Sit down,
keiki
. Think; reason this out. Your mother is asking for nothing more than for you to put the past away and make a new future.”
“It’s more than I can do.” Kaia stared at her mother. Faye—Paie—or whatever she wanted to be called—looked pale. Kaia hardened her heart.
“Please, Kaia. I’m so sorry,” her mother whispered. She rose and came toward Kaia.
Kaia took a step back as her mother reached out to touch her again. She put her hands up to her face. “Leave me alone. I can’t think.” She looked down at Jesse. “Can we get out of here?”
“Sure.” He stood, and his eyes were filled with sympathy.
Kaia looked back to her mother. “You’ve talked to Bane, haven’t you? That’s why he was trying to tell me it was time to look for you.”
“Yes,” Faye admitted.
“I suppose he welcomed you with open arms.” Kaia’s lips twisted. She could imagine Bane’s response.
If her mother thought she was going to be welcomed with a fatted calf like the prodigal son, she was mistaken. The most Kaia could summon right now was a mess of pottage.
K
aia ran toward the ocean. She heard Jesse shout her name, but the waves beckoned her, and she could see Nani zipping through the water to greet her. As she ran, she shucked her shorts, tank top, and slippers off until she wore only her swimsuit. The warm sand grated against the soles of her feet.
She reached the edge of the water and waded in. When the water was to her knees, she dove into the next white-crested wave. The warm water welcomed her in a loving, unconditional embrace. Nani bumped against her, and Kaia reached out and grabbed the dolphin’s nostrum. She closed her eyes and listened to the song of the sea whisper to her aching heart.
She’d always imagined what it would be like if her mother came back. In her dreams, she was able to coldly tell her mother she had no desire to see her. There was no pain in her dream, no wrenching agony of being torn between love and hate, betrayal and loyalty.
She put her feet down on the bedrock of lava and sand and stood. “God, be my foundation right now. I can’t stand this by myself,” she whispered. Nani nudged her knee, and she leaned down and ran her hand over the warm inner tube of dolphin skin. Nani rolled to one side and one eye stared up at Kaia as if to ask if she could help.
Kaia sank into the water and let the waves lap around her neck. Her knees scraped bottom, and she steadied herself then put both arms around Nani. The tears she’d managed to hold back began to mingle with the salt water on her cheeks. The little girl in her wanted to run back into the house and feel her mother’s arms around her. She’d lacked that all her life. Why would she want it when she’d always had the love of her grandparents though? That should have been enough.
She had dim memories of her mother. A faint fragrance of blossoms, a tinkling laugh, soft hands. Maybe that’s where these longings came from. Faye was very different from the image Kaia had of her mother. She remembered a ready smile and loving arms before her mother left. Faye was nervous and uncertain, not at all the confident, laughing mother.
But people change. Was her mother really as sorry as she claimed, or was it all a ploy?
Tutu kane
was getting older. Could Faye have come back to make sure she inherited the family property? Kaia wouldn’t put it past her. She had proven herself capable of anything.
She stayed in the water until her fingers turned to prunes. She could see Jesse sitting patiently on a piece of driftwood on the beach. Her cat, Hiwa, was at his feet. Giving Nani a final pat, she rose from the water and walked toward him. He stood as she came out of the water and handed her the shorts and top she’d discarded.
“Mahalo.”
She pulled on her clothing and picked up her slippers. “Sorry I ran out like that.”
“I understand.”
His tone surprised her. “How would you know? You grew up with both parents. They’re
still alive.”
“I understand that forgiving myself was harder than forgiving someone else. I had to face what I’d done to Christy and my son and let go of it.”
“I can’t.”
“I know. You’re afraid.”
Her eyes widened. He’d put his finger on it exactly. “I didn’t realize it until you said it, but I
am
scared. Scared I’ll let my guard down and learn to love her and she’ll betray me all over again.”
He nodded. “She’s going to have to earn your trust.”
“I don’t think she can.” Kaia started toward the house. “It will take more than a pretty smile and a casual ‘I’m sorry’ to make me believe her.”
“Try,” he suggested.
“I’ll think about it,” was all she could say.
J
esse didn’t bring up Faye to Kaia again. He figured if she wanted to talk about it, he’d listen, but there was nothing he hated worse than someone badgering him. Kaia surely felt the same. Faye was gone when they went back to the house, and Oke said nothing as Kaia stalked through the living room and down the hall toward the bedroom wing.
Oke shook his head sadly and went to the kitchen. Jesse crashed on the couch. After four hours of sleep, his cell phone awakened him. It was Jillian, who told him her flight was getting in tomorrow. Yawning, he promised to pick her up then stood and went to find Kaia. They needed to get moving. The danger facing them hadn’t diminished just because Kaia had personal problems.
Bane was in the living room talking in soft tones to his grandfather. Jesse glanced around but didn’t see Kaia or Heidi.
Oke saw him. “If you’re looking for your niece and my granddaughter, they are out working with Nani.”
“Alone?”
“Mano is with them,” Bane said.
That wasn’t much comfort. Mano was still under suspicion, and while Jesse didn’t think he’d harm his own sister, he wouldn’t put it past the man to allow Heidi to be taken.
He strode past the other men and looked out the window. He could see three heads in the waves, and the sound of Heidi’s laughter floated to him on the wind.
“They are fine,” Oke said. “No need to worry. Mano will guard them with his life.”
Jesse turned back to the other men. Maybe it was time for a heart-to-heart talk.
“How much do you know of what your grandson has been up to lately?” he asked Oke.
“I believe in my grandson,” Oke said. “I doubt there is anything you could say to shake that faith.”
Jesse winced. He wished he’d had someone who trusted him like that. It was a shame he was going to have to shatter that confidence.
“Mano has been attending meetings at Pele Hawai´i. He seems to have become a zealot for their cause.”
Oke’s white head bowed. “He’s young and impetuous. He’ll soon see past their rhetoric.”
“I’m afraid it’s gone beyond rhetoric. I believe the agency is behind the deaths and security breaches at the base, and I’m positive the men who tried to kidnap Heidi last night were Pele Hawai’i flunkies.”
“You’re saying you believe Mano is part of this conspiracy?” A slight smile touched Oke’s lips. “You don’t know my grandson. He has a strong streak of justice and compassion for those in need. He would never harm a child.”
“He might not have known about this particular ploy,” Jesse admitted. “But he’s deeper into this conspiracy than I think you know.”
“Let’s ask him,” Oke said. “My grandson has never lied to me.” He rose and went toward the door.
Jesse sighed and stood. His gaze met Bane’s. The other man shrugged. “I have to agree with my grandfather. I’ve been upset with Mano for getting involved with them, but he’s no murderer.”
Jesse hoped they were right. Confronted with his family’s concern, maybe Mano would help them.
He trailed behind Oke and Bane down the path to the sea. The salty air brushed his face and lifted the fatigue that still dogged him.
Kaia was laughing as they played keep-away with a beach ball. Heidi and Nani were in the middle while Mano tossed the ball back and forth with Kaia. The dolphin jumped in the air and nosed the ball over to Heidi.
Jesse’s gaze lingered on Kaia. Her face glistened with water, and her sleek black hair lay plastered to her back with the line of her face fully exposed to the golden sunshine. The curve of her cheeks and lips enhanced her dark eyes. He’d never seen anything more beautiful in his life. An ache he’d never felt tugged at him.
What he was beginning to feel for Kaia was different from the love he’d felt for Christy. Christy’s love had been gentle and comfortable. This was as wild and unpredictable as a Kona wind.
There was no time to analyze it though, because Oke called to his grandson. “Mano, can you come here for a minute?”
The young man tossed the ball Heidi had just thrown him to Kaia. “Be right there.” Striding from the water, he looked like a young King Kamehameha. Stocky with thick muscles, Mano looked confident and in control.
Dripping with water, he stood in front of them and looked at Jesse then back to his grandfather. His eyes were filled with trepidation. “Is something wrong?”
His back erect, Oke advanced toward his grandson. “Mano, you have never lied to me. I want to know about Pele Hawai´i. Are they involved in the break-ins at the base?” Oke’s voice was stern.
Mano looked down at the sand. His lips tightened and he glanced at Jesse. “Is this your doing, Matthews? Have you come here with your lies to turn my family against me?”
“That was not my intention,” Jesse said. “But I need to protect my niece. And your sister.”
Mano frowned. “I’ll protect my sister. No harm will come to her.”
Jesse noticed Mano said nothing about Heidi. “What about my niece?”
Oke interrupted. “Did you have anything to do with the kidnapping attempt on Heidi?”
Mano tossed his head in a proud gesture. “You would believe this
haole
?”
“Watch how you say that. I was born on Kaua’i.” Jesse said. He tried to keep his voice mild. Mano was cornered, and it would be easy to provoke him to a fight.
“Do not evade my question, Mano.” Oke reached out and gripped his grandson’s arm. “Tell me the truth.”
Mano gave Jesse an angry look then gently pried his grandfather’s fingers from his arm. “I can’t talk about it now,
Tutu kane
. I have an appointment.” He strode off toward the house.
Jesse saw disillusionment in Oke’s face. He wished he could reassure the old man, but Mano’s behavior spoke for itself.
“I’m going to the meeting tonight,
Tutu kane
,” Bane said. “If Mano is involved, I’ll find out.”
Oke straightened. “Until then, I choose to believe in my grandson.”
Jesse tried not to look at the way love and fear vied for control of Oke’s face. He hoped the old man wouldn’t be too crushed when the truth came out.
Jesse glanced at his watch. Two o’clock. They had several hours before they needed to be back at the boat. He waved to Kaia, and she spoke to Heidi and they both came in on the next wave.