Divine Grace (55 page)

* * * *

One Friday, in the middle of July, Grace was working at the sales counter sorting new orders she’d just received when the doorbell rang, and she looked up to greet the next customer.

Shock made her heart pound when she looked into Owen’s eyes. She took out her cell phone. She had never filed a restraining order but instantly regretted never doing it. Then she castigated herself.

The Grace who had allowed him to mistreat her was dead and gone.

New and improved Grace was either about to clean his sorry-ass clock or maybe get shot in the head if he was armed. She sincerely hoped he wasn’t armed.

She moved out from behind the counter, ice in her heart and steel in her backbone. She heard, “Oh, shit,” from one of her partners in the hallway leading out front. She knew Rose would call Jack now.

“Don’t call him yet, Rose. Hold on for just a second.”

She scowled at Owen with distaste. He looked smaller and weaker than she remembered him. His face was gaunt. As he looked her over, she watched the emotions playing over his features.

His face showed a flicker of fear when he looked in her eyes, as though he might have believed she was about to kick his ass personally. He had not fared well in jail but must have cooperated with the judge because here he was.

“What the hell are you doing here?” she asked in a cold voice.

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Owen put up his hands in surrender, and his eyes pleaded with Grace to listen to him. Curiosity won out, and she ceased her advance on him. He stood by the door, his hands still in front of him, sort of afraid. Good for him.

“I didn’t come here to ask for anything, okay? Please, just hear me out, and then I promise I’ll go and never bother you ever again.” There was meekness about Owen that was new. The Owen she knew subjugated everyone around him and placed the blame for his life screw-ups at everyone else’s feet. This Owen looked broken-hearted, actually just plain
broken
.

“What do you have to say to me that I could possibly want to hear?” she asked defensively. She was very curious but not willing to let him think he’d just get away with saying his piece and then leaving.

“I came to apologize. I came to tell you I’m sorry I came up here last month and asked for money and threatened you. I accused you of stealing my stuff. I know that my things got stolen from my truck while it was impounded. I was nothing but a drunken son of a bitch and I never held a job and provided for you the way a man should.” His voice shook with emotion.

“I allowed you to work two jobs to support my sorry drunken ass. I kept you from going to college like you wanted to after high school. I embarrassed you by being arrested drunk on your front lawn last month. I insulted you all those years and told you that you were fat and ugly. I made you think I’d only…you know,
have sex with you in the dark
,” he whispered it softly so no one else could hear, “and let you think it was because I thought you were fat. It was because I didn’t want you to see how inadequate I was. I accused you of screwing the repairman to pay for the repair on the AC, and I ruined your laptop computer. I wasn’t there for you

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and I used you.” His voice cracked, and he quickly swiped the tears from his face on his sleeve. “I’m sorry.
Sorry
for all those things and because I never loved you the way you
deserved
. And Lord have mercy on me, I’m
so sorry
I hit you, Grace. I’ll never be able to forgive myself for hitting you.”

“You sorry sack of shit, you can’t even remember half of what you’re apologizing for.”

“Your men paid me a visit after I got out of rehab and got put on probation. I was already going to come and apologize to you, but they paid me a call this morning and told me what I’d done. I’ve only been out of rehab a couple of days, but I’m clean. I’m staying in a half-way house and going to AA meetings every night. Judge says if I screw up again, he’ll go hard on me. I got counseling when I was in rehab and started talking to your old pastor who comes to visit there. We’re gonna start meeting at his office every week. There’s a new distribution center being built in Waco, and a friend of mine I met in rehab told me there might be a job for me there. If I go, I’ll stay in AA and keep getting counseling. I’m not well and healthy, but I know I did it to myself.

“I know you’re getting married to Mr. Warner in two weeks, and I wanted to congratulate you and tell you I’m really happy for you, Grace.”

His eyes overflowed as he looked at her, his voice shaking harder. “Mr.

Warner is a good man, I can tell, and I know he’s going to take good care of you, just like you always deserved. I feel real bad for making you think you were fat and ugly, but even worse because I know you
believed
me.”

“Grace, you’re just the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen, standing there. You look pretty as an angel, and I never saw it and never told you, and I’m a bastard for it, I know. I know all you’ll have of me are sad memories because I hurt you so much, but I want you to know I wish you every joy that life can offer you, and I hope someday you can find it in your heart to forgive me.”

He wiped his tears on his shirt sleeve again and shoved his hands in his pockets. He scrunched his shoulders and looked at his feet for a second, visibly trying to pull himself together. “If–if there is something you feel like you need to say to me, whatever it is, I deserve it, and you can say it if you want to,” he offered and then seemed to brace himself for whatever she might conceivably say.

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She felt impassive looking at him, felt no strong emotion at all, really.

Maybe that was because he’d surprised her, both by showing up but also by making a sincere, heartfelt apology, something she would not have expected in a million years. She thought of the last few times she’d seen him. She clearly remembered him backhanding her, then beating on her door in the middle of the night, then standing in the very same spot threatening her for money. As those images flicked through her mind one at a time, she realized they no longer had strong emotions attached to them. They were just old memories. She’d experienced too much love in the interim for them to hold sway over her, and his apology seemed to also play a part in some of the pain leaking from the recollection.

“If you have an opportunity to find love again, ever, in your life, will you treat her with respect and honor her?”

“I doubt there will ever be another woman for me, Grace, not after you, after what I’ve done. I realized in jail the second time around and even more in rehab how bad what I’d done to you was.”

Grace sighed, knowing she had to release him and severe the bond forever. “Owen, I hope in time you will forgive yourself. I appreciate your apology. I’d never have thought you’d own up to your actions. I’m glad you’re clean. I forgive you, Owen.” He’d quietly started weeping again, trying to hold back sobs that were racking his gaunt frame. She handed him the box of Kleenex tissues, which he thanked her for.

“I forgive you for what you did to me and the things you said. I wish you well, Owen. Please promise me now that you will never, ever, contact me again.”

He smiled tearfully at her, and she watched as he accepted her words and nodded, wiping his eyes, then his nose. “I promise, Grace. Thank you.

Your forgiveness means a lot. Congratulations on your marriage.” He raised a hand in farewell and backed through the door as he pulled it open. She heard the ignition of a vehicle start and drive away quietly.

She walked to her desk and sat down in her chair, trying to sort through her feelings. She felt very…detached, emotionally. Should she be crying?

Should she be throwing up? Should she be feeling woozy? All she felt now was relief and closure. The closure felt good. She leaned back in her chair, looking at the doorway to the hall leading to the work room.

“Did you call him?” Grace asked, dryly.

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Rose’s disembodied voice called from the workroom, “Hell yes, I called him. What did you expect, silly girl?”

“I handled it.”

“I know! You were
scary cool
. Feel like throwin’ up?”

“Nah, I’m good.

“Dizzy?”

“Not now, give it five minutes.”’

“He’ll be here in less than that. We’re sending you home, sweetie.

Ethan’s coming with him.”

“We have deadlines, Rose. I can stay.”

“We’re in great shape. You can go, sweet cheeks.”

“There is no arguing with you, is there?”

“Nope, resistance is futile,” Rose said, laughing, as she finally came in the front room. “Get your purse. I hear him pulling in now.”

Jack and Ethan walked in the front door, concern written on their features. She got up and went to them and hugged them both in turn.

“Darlin’, you all right?”

“Yes, Jack, I’m
very
all right. Perfect.” She kissed and hugged him again, then reached for Ethan, who wrapped his arms around her.

“We were afraid you’d be upset, Gracie. Do you feel shaky?” He looked into her eyes.

“No, not yet at least.” She shook her head. “He came to apologize, and I forgave him.”

“That’s great, honey.” Ethan stroked her cheek and looked into her eyes, then guided her to sit back down.

“He told me you paid him a visit.” Grace said looking from one to the other.

Jack nodded, stroking her shoulder. “Yes. He told us he was planning on coming to apologize to you. I think he was afraid we were going to beat him up.”

Ethan scoffed. “Are you kidding? He looked ready to wet his pants when he saw us at the door. We told him if he was planning on making an apology that he needed to be enlightened about everything he’d done to you, since he was blacked out for part of it. I’m glad he didn’t chicken out. If you’ll give me your keys, Jack is going to drive you home.”

“But I have errands to run this afternoon.”

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“We’ll make you lunch, and you’re gonna rest for a while,” Ethan told her. “The house is noisy right now, but they can knock it off for an hour to let you eat some lunch and rest, then I’ll take you to run your errands after that.”

She might have argued, but she felt herself beginning to run out of steam. She tried to hide it. It was only 10:45 a.m., and she had things she needed to get done.

She had a fitting to get to. Maudie had found her the perfect dress, if she was judging by the dreamy look in both Ethan and Adam’s eyes when they saw her in it the first time. Maudie had ordered fabric that matched the silken mesh on the skirt of the wedding dress and made Grace’s veil herself.

Carrie had called her that morning to let her know the portraits were framed and ready to be picked up. This was her favorite part of all her wedding plans—having those boudoir portraits made for her men. There was no way she’d be able to get them if Ethan was with her.

“I see those sleepy eyes, Gracie. Where are your keys? Lie down at home for an hour and you know you’ll feel better. Then we can go do whatever you need to do, honey. I promise. Wait until you see what they accomplished upstairs. You’re gonna be very happy.” She grinned at him and handed him her keys.

She hugged Rose and Martha and climbed into the SUV with Jack.

When they walked in the front door, they were assaulted by the noise of progress upstairs. The renovation was ahead of schedule and would be done by the middle of the week before the wedding. Grace was amazed by how quickly demolition had occurred upstairs and watched in awe as the upstairs transformed into the master, or in her case,
mistress
suite.

The bathroom alone was a work of art, done in coordinated shades of rosy pink. The tub was situated in the center of the bathroom, positioned in front of a two-sided fireplace. A large, glass brick window dominated one whole wall. Talk about sexy. Rosy, earth-toned tiles covered the floor and lined the huge walk-in steam shower. The sinks were large, cut glass bowls with elegant faucets and taps. The counters were a sparkling creamy marble with just a hint of rose, and the walls were the palest shade of creamy rose.

The bedroom was to have wooden floors with large, thick area rugs.

Wesley had finished the bed a few weeks ago and was done with all but one of the pieces she’d ordered. He and Evan had worked hard getting the

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furniture built. Schedules had gotten busy, and they hadn’t found the time to get together yet. She hadn’t heard anymore from Evan on the subject of her relationship, and she hoped that meant that she’d done an adequate job of answering his questions and not because things had gone sour for him.

The canopy, linens, and mattress, which was
enormous
, had arrived and were in storage at the moment, along with several pieces of furniture and the bed which Wesley had delivered to them, saying he had another big rush order he had to get on right away. Grace was eager to see how it would all look put together, and thought that the closed room in the barn where all the furniture was currently stored was awfully full. She didn’t remember ordering that much furniture, but couldn’t be sure because it was all draped with heavy cotton drop cloths and packed in there so tightly she couldn’t even get in.