Don't Lie to Me (12 page)

When I got back to my dark apartment, I peeled off my dress, laid down in bed and cried. I cried until I drifted off into a fitful sleep, filled with dreams of Jack.

The combination of my cell phone exploding and a loud pounding jolted me out of sleep the next morning. I turned over in my bed, trying to place the noise and saw that it was only seven o’clock. With swollen, dry eyes, I rubbed my face wondering where the pounding noise was coming from. It didn’t feel like it was the sound I heard in my head from a headache from drinking too much. I fumbled around on my nightstand, grabbed my phone to shut off the shrill sound, and grimaced when I looked at the screen. Jack.

Realization dawned on me and I sat up quickly, instantly regretting the quick motion. It only made my head hurt worse, but the pounding didn’t stop because it wasn’t in my head. I silenced the ringer on my phone and climbed out of bed as he shouted my name in the hallway. I had to answer the door before he woke up my entire building.

I threw on my ugly, large terry cloth robe that covered every single inch of my body and went to answer the door. I didn’t want Jack seeing any part of me.

“I’m coming Jack!” I yelled back through the apartment so he would stop beating down my door before he broke it. The sound finally stopped but my head still hurt.

He looked panicked when I opened the door. Both arms braced on the sides of the doorway, his head bowed slightly, chest heaving, still wearing the same suit he threw on the night before. He looked like shit.

I didn’t look at him when he raised his head. Instead I turned away from him, walked to the kitchen, and grabbed a cup of coffee, thankful I had remembered to set the pot to brew before I collapsed into my bed. There was a shitstorm coming, I could feel it, and I needed every drop of caffeine I could find. If I could mainline it into my arm, that’d be even better, but my mom always taught that me beggars couldn’t be choosers.

“Do you want a cup?” I asked Jack, trying to ignore the pacing animal in my living room. He was seething in anger and I hated the tension that filled my tiny apartment.

My words stopped him instantly and even though I wasn’t looking at him - in fact I was trying to look at anything else besides him as I sipped my cup of coffee – I could feel his darkened eyes on me.

“No, I don’t want a fucking cup of coffee, Emma.”

My own anger filled my body at his words. “Fine.”

I spit it out at him just as angrily as he talked to me, knowing it would only piss him off. I didn’t care in that moment. I was pissed, and my head hurt, and I could barely open my eyes. Plus, I knew that no matter what happened, he wasn’t going to open up to me about anything. There was really nothing to discuss.

I ignored the anger rolling off him in waves and sat down at my kitchen table, gently setting the coffee mug down and plastered on the most indifferent expression I could fake. He came barging into my apartment early in the morning. He could speak first.

“I seriously fucking hate that word.” He exhaled loudly and walked to my fireplace, looking at the pictures of Logan and me all over the mantle.

“Stop saying that,” I scolded and drank my coffee. I meant the f-word, but he probably thought I was mocking him based on how quickly his head spun around and he stalked toward me. I refused to show him how angry and hurt and disappointed I was, though. “I meant ‘fuck’ Jack.”

He stopped, and roughly ran his hands through his hair before he walked to the kitchen and poured himself a cup of coffee. I hid my smile at his concession for a cup of fucking coffee.

“You weren’t there when I got home.”

No shit.

I pursed my lips and raised my eyebrows slightly, looking at him from over the edge of my coffee cup that I held with both hands so he couldn’t see them shaking.

“Did you really expect me to wait?”

He had the grace to look ashamed for even thinking I would still be there.

“I’m not going to wait around for you to screw me when you’re pissed at someone else, Jack. I deserve more than that.”

And there it was. I needed more than he could give me, and we both knew it. I watched his anger subside slightly and his tense expression soften. The muscles in his neck and chest loosened as he sat down at the chair across from me. He leaned back in his chair and silently drank his coffee. I was almost surprised he didn’t just walk away right there.

Finally he set his coffee down and leaned forward, resting his elbows on the table. “I told you I’d fuck this up, Emma.”

“You did. And I’m not as upset at what you said, it was how you said it and what you didn’t say.”

“I told you. I don’t talk about Brian.”

I lost my ability to bite back my snark. “He has a name today?”

Jack looked at me intensely. I couldn’t tell if he was angry or frustrated. Whatever it was, it left me speechless. I shut my mouth and went back to drinking my coffee while I tried to ignore the gorgeous brown eyes and scruffy haired sexy man across from me. I chided myself silently. I was pissed at him, and yet I wanted nothing more than to gaze into those eyes for the rest of the day. I hated the contradicting feelings inside me.

I refilled my coffee cup, still ignoring the growing tension when Jack finally spoke. I froze instantly, not at all expecting his explanation.

“We’re not really brothers.”

I calmly set my hands in my lap, and waited, patiently for him to continue.

Jack reached back to his neck and rubbed it, not removing his eyes from me. He sighed heavily and I watched his shoulders sag. Whatever he was debating to say, was important. I stopped the hope in my chest from rising too far. I didn’t want to get my hopes up that he would actually tell me something important only to have them dashed again. I simply waited.

“Steven McMillan wasn’t actually my dad. I’m adopted.” My mouth dropped to form a perfect ‘O’ shape in surprise. As much as I wanted to maintain my composure, nothing prepared me for that. I had absolutely no idea. “Yeah. Brian is Steven’s biological son. We grew up together, but when I was thirteen, my parents died, and Steven adopted me because I was alone and he didn’t want me going into foster care.”

“I had no idea.” My words were soft, along with my softening expression. This was more than I expected to hear.

“I keep it private. Mostly because it’s no one’s business but mine. After my parents died, I started getting into a lot of trouble at school and Brian got sucked into all of it with me. I was an angry kid, fighting and not caring about anything in the world. When we were sixteen, we got busted by the cops at a party. We were both drunk and high. Steven finally knocked some sense into me. He took me to my parent’s graves and made me face them. Told me how pissed they’d be at me and how I was disgracing their memory and their love for me. It shook me up, but Brian was in so much more deeply than I was with drugs that nothing we said or did after that helped. He started hating me, blaming me for his problems, and that I was better than he was at sports and school. I grew closer to Steven, while he began to despise both of us. Slowly, our friendship completely deteriorated and he went off the rails with drugs.”

I sat there, listening, while my mind spun with thoughts the entire time. I couldn’t even imagine what it would feel like to lose your parents, and then your friend. There was clearly much more to the story than he had already shared, but it was enough. It was more than enough for me. The story explained so much about the man Jack was, and why he refused to get close to anyone.

“And then you took over his company.”

I watched a look of sadness fill Jack’s eyes. The look was so foreign on him I almost didn’t recognize it. He took a drink from his coffee and shook his head slowly.

“I never wanted to take it from him, but he was so far gone by the time we went to college that Steven didn’t have another choice. When Steven got sick, he told me he wanted me to take the company over one day. I always knew he wanted it to stay as a family business, so I changed my last name to his. Brian calls every once in a while when he’s in trouble and I help him out.”

“And that’s what happened last night?”

Jack raised his eyes to mine, slowly. His silence was answer enough. I didn’t need to know the specifics. Without him saying a single word, I understood. His guilt and pain written all over his face and in his defeated posture.

“No one knows except Martin.” I smiled slightly at the mention of Martin. He worked for Jack’s company and I knew he’d been around for years. He was Jack’s mentor in the company when Steven died and was very much a father figure to him. I had met him several times and he was always warm and friendly with me. He reminded me of my own dad. “We promised Steven we would never let Brian - or his issues - be made public, so periodically we have to clean up his messes,” he sighed slowly. “I’ve never told anyone any of this before, Emma.”

It was equal parts a declaration at how much he trusted me and warning to never mention this to anyone again. I nodded in understanding.

“I won’t say anything. To anyone.”

Without warning, Jack’s sad eyes disappeared. Instantly, the hazy look I was starting to know all too well replaced the sadness and regret. As much as I wanted to stay angry with him, I couldn’t - not when he just opened himself up to me so much. I pretended to ignore the look of desire filling his eyes and pressed my thighs together.

He looked at the watch on his wrist, and then back to me. “We still have something else to talk about.”

I cleared my throat and feigned innocence. “Talk?”

I watched as he licked his lower lip and nodded slowly. I felt the wetness between my thighs, just watching his tongue slowly wipe across his lips. The things he can do with that tongue.

NINE

Without a word, he came over to my chair. He crouched down and turned me toward him. My thighs opened for him automatically and a small victorious smile appeared on his lips.

But he didn’t touch me; at least not how I wanted him to. Instead, his hands slowly rubbed up my legs, outside of my thick robe.

“This robe is the most hideous thing I have ever seen,” he said softly, smiling right into my eyes. He slowly began untying the robe at my waist.

I chuckled softly in agreement, my voice breathless when I spoke. “Is this what we needed to talk about? My choice in sleepwear?”

“No, but now that you mention it….” his voice trailed off as he finished untying the knot at my waist. With his hands on my robe, he wasn’t touching me at all, but my skin felt like it was on fire as his eyes roamed all over my chest, stomach, and completely naked body. “This is what you’ll sleep in from now on.”

Fine by me, especially if he always looked at me like that. Jack took my hand and slowly pulled me up so my chest pressed against his body. His erection evident as it pressed into my lower stomach. “We need to talk about you lying to me, and how it’ll never happen again.” His voice sounded ominous.

“Lying?” I choked the words out.

“You told me you’d be there when you got back. You lied.” He continued without waiting for a response. Both of his hands framed my cheeks as he pulled back slightly, and earnestly looked directly into my eyes. “I’m going to fuck this up enough for the both of us, Emma. I need your honesty.”

Without waiting for my answer, his lips fell to mine. Softly, teasing me, nipping my bottom lip, and then my top, and then moved to the corners of my mouth. I wanted a real kiss. Passionate and hard, like how he always kissed me but as I tried to move to take it, he pulled back.

“God I just fucking want you.” Before I knew what happened, his arms went back to my waist as he picked me up. I immediately squealed and wrapped my legs around him. He carried me down the hall to my bedroom without saying another word. I buried my head into his neck, excited, and scared – still trying to figure out what he meant by punishment.

He stood me up on the floor right next to my bed and slowly let my robe fall to the floor.

“I’m sorry for lying,” I whispered, my nerves increasing as he slowly scanned every inch of my body without touching me. I reached out to remove his suit coat, but Jack’s hand gripped mine.

“You need to take that off.” It was the same suit he wore yesterday to work, and then for our date. Essentially he’d now been in that suit for almost thirty hours, and it looked ragged.