Don't Tell (18 page)

She was on the brink of changing her life, but the knowing didn’t make the moment any less awesome. She wanted him, wanted his hands on her, wanted to feel his body against her own. In all her life she’d never wanted like this, never believed she was capable of such an insatiable craving. In the seven years of freedom, she’d never once felt the liquid tug of desire for a man, any man. Not until this man.

She felt smooth fabric and hard chest under her hands as they flattened against him, shoving his overcoat aside and running up his chest until they met the warm skin of his neck and clasped there, bringing him closer. Inching up on her toes, she pressed her body upwards, seeking a more complete fit.

Max had wondered how it would be, dreamed of how it would be. But it was better than his dreams. It was perfect. She was perfect. Her lips molded exquisitely to his mouth, yielding to the pressure of the kiss, at first returning it in her more reserved manner. He moved her head with his palm to increase the tenor of the kiss by a degree, seeking new angles and finding beauty in each one, losing himself in the sheer feeling of her. Then her hands clutched at him and her reserved response simply exploded.

Knowing his kiss had so affected her was more arousing than any of the smoother moves he’d ever had put on him by more sophisticated women. Feeling her arms lock around his neck released the strangled groan that had been building deep within him for days. But still he managed to hang onto control by a thread. Until her body twisted against him. Restraint evaporated and his free hand slid down the curve of her back, cupped her round bottom and lifted her higher. One step brought her shoulders into contact with the wall and she started in surprise, throwing her hips forward and against his rigid erection.

For an electric instant both Caroline and Max went still, frozen by the blatant carnality of the contact and everything it implied. Max lifted his head to find her eyes open, a mix of unbridled desire and astonished wonder. The desire made him press harder, deeper into the softness of her body. But the wonder made him pull back. This was another first for her, he was certain. He would stop this time. That there would be a next time was a given fact.

He released his hold slowly, until her feet again touched the floor, the physical bond between them broken. Wisps of hair framed her face, whipped about by the rapid breaths he exhaled. Her lips were plump and full, her cheeks chafed by his beard. She was beautiful.

„God.“ He dropped his head, resting his cheek on the top of her head. His heart was jerking like a jackhammer, his lungs pumping like a bellows. His body was throbbing painfully. He’d never felt so alive. This was good; he knew it intuitively. This was where he was supposed to be. And she was where she was supposed to be. In his arms.

„What?“ Caroline asked, hearing a voice totally unlike her own. Breathy and… sexy? Hard to contemplate. She – Caroline, reborn into a woman who could tear a groan from a man like Max Hunter. Incredible. Reality. The hands she’d locked behind his neck loosened and slid forward to frame his jaws, caressing lightly with her thumbs before dropping to her sides.

One of his large hands still tangled her hair and he used it now to gently tug her head back. His lips brushed over her reddened cheeks, dropping soft, plucking kisses along the curve of her jaw to the sensitive spot behind her ear, just above the collar of her sweater. Another shiver raced down her spine.

„I’m sorry,“ he murmured in her ear. „I scratched your face. Tomorrow, I’ll shave first.“ Then he stepped back and shrugged out of his overcoat, watching her face the whole time.

Wonder gave way to amazement. He was sorry because he’d scratched her face? Caroline fought the urge to shake her head. So this is how normal men behave, she thought, but even as her brain formed the notion she knew it wasn’t true. There was nothing normal about Max Hunter.

In small phases, amazement gave way to amusement. Tomorrow? She arched her brows, tilting her head as she watched him hang his coat on a hook next to hers. His eyes never left her face as if he were watching for any flicker of refusal and the thought made her heart swell. Considerate and vulnerable in a cocky kind of way. A newfound confidence bloomed.

„Promise?“ she asked.

„Promise what?“

„Promise you’ll shave.“

A grin warmed his eyes before settling on his mouth and the effect on his face took her breath away. He was the most incredible-looking man. She tested her tender lip with the tip of her tongue. With the most inventive mouth. He hadn’t kissed. He’d devoured and cherished in the same effort. Tomorrow. Mercy.

„Cross my heart.“ Loosening his tie, he pointed to the kitchen. „And now it’s time for dinner.“

Caroline cracked an egg into the bowl of Max’s restaurant-grade mixer. His kitchen tools were something out of Better Homes even if the decor was classic sixties. „Leave the math assignment on the dining room table. I want to see it with my own eyes. And remember, no camping trip during spring break if your report card has a C in math where a B should be. And, Tom?“

„Yeah, Mom.“

Caroline shook her head at her son’s barely veiled patience, clearly hearing in his voice the strain from the night before. Rarely had they allowed so much time to pass before clearing the air and now Caroline wasn’t sure how to talk to her own child. So she fell back on the familiar. She was his mother. Like it or not. „I’m sending Dana over to check on you in about an hour. Do not let anyone else in the apartment.“

„I know, Mom.“ A pause and the sound of the refrigerator door opening. „Do not answer the door and do not get into a car with strangers, no matter how delicious their candy,“ he finished sarcastically.

Caroline sighed. „Am I that bad, honey?“

There was a moment of uncomfortable silence, then Tom sighed too. „No, not really.“ He bit into an apple, the sound cracking in her ear. „You’re a good mom,“ he finished with his mouth full, and just like that the air was cleared. „And usually responsible,“ he added lightly. „But give me the number where you are anyway and call me before you leave for home.“

Caroline complied, hearing the effort he was making. „And I’ll be home before curfew, sir.“

„See that you do.“ He hesitated a beat. „Mom? I’m sorry I got so mad last night, but…“ He drew a breath. „But you just met him and… Mom, are you sure this guy is okay?“

Love surged, and with it a deep sorrow that her son would ever think to ask the question. „Yes, sweetheart, he is. But if it will set your mind at ease, call later.“

„I will.“

„Bye, doll.“

„Mom!“

„Sorry.“ She deepened her voice, going for serious. „Goodbye, Thomas.“ Shaking her head, she replaced the receiver just in time to see Max coming down the stairs, taking them one at a time. He hurt, she knew. She tried to wish he hadn’t strained himself kissing her senseless after taking that fall, but couldn’t find the selflessness required. Her body still purred and it had only been a kiss. Yeah, and the Grand Canyon was just a hole in the ground. She shivered despite the heat of his kitchen and turned for the stove, giving him relative privacy to limp to the table.

„You get through okay?“

She could hear the strain he tried to hide, then saw it in the lines around his eyes when she turned around to face him. „Yes, thanks. Tom will enjoy having the apartment to himself for a few hours. That translates to scarfing down potato chips in the living room, having the remote all to himself and putting his feet in all the places his size-thirteen shoes are not supposed to be.“

Max remembered Caroline’s son and once again wondered where the boy got his height. „And you’re sure he’s just fourteen?“

She threw him a wry glance. „Fairly certain as I happened to be there when he was born.“ She reached for two bowls of salad and set them down on the table. „You have exactly ten different kinds of salad dressing.“ Her dimples winked at him. „David told me about the shopping trip from hell. Your mother must have had coupons for every brand in the store.“

„Ranch is fine.“ He watched in appreciation as she reached high into his pantry, her fluid movements throwing her breasts into prominence. He arched his brows and told himself to cool down. Hah. „So what’s for dinner?“

„Breaded chicken with potatoes and cold pasta salad. I found the pasta salad in the fridge.“

„Ma made it.“ He watched as she tossed the chicken in the batter she’d mixed and set it sizzling in a frying pan on the stove.

„She takes care of you.“

„Yes, when I let her.“

„Tom says the same thing. I guess mothers never stop being mothers.“

Even when their sons break their hearts, Max thought, then banished it away. Ma had forgiven him years ago. He would focus on the future, not the past.

„I saw your home gym in the living room,“ Caroline commented, casually. „It’s really nice.“

Max shifted in his chair, controlling the wince. „Thanks, I use it every day. Doctor’s orders.“

„I remember.“ She closed her eyes, muttering a curse when the oil popped and blistered her skin.

Max watched her stick her finger under a stream of cold water. „There’s a first-aid kit under the sink,“ he remarked. He’d picked up on her distress in the parking lot after she’d told him about being in a lot of hospitals. Now he sensed the same apprehension as she quickly applied a dab of bacterial cream to her burned finger.

„Thanks. That was careless of me.“ She threw a jaunty grin over her shoulder that didn’t reach her eyes. „But don’t worry. I won’t sue you.“

„Have a seat, Caroline.“

Her eyes registered surprised apprehension, but she quietly obeyed, taking up her fork, toying with the lettuce in her bowl.

„I want to tell you a story.“ He’d made the decision in the split second he saw the fear cloud her eyes even as she’d smiled at him. He wanted her to trust him with the truth. He could think of no better way to earn her trust than to give her the gift first.

Her gaze fixed on the table. „About a boy on a dirt bike?“

He reached out and covered her hand with his own, gently forcing the fork to clatter back into the bowl. „Yes. Look at me, Caroline.“ And he waited until she lifted her eyes, and again he thought of the sea. A very turbulent sea. „Five years after the dirt bike birthday, I graduated high school and went off to college on a basketball scholarship.“ He’d surprised her, he thought, as her eyes flickered. But she said nothing, so he continued. „Played starting guard for four years at the University of Kentucky.“ He thought back to the boy he’d been, the regrets too many to count. „All I ever wanted to do was play basketball. I ate, drank and breathed it. And I was good.“

He stood with some difficulty and walked to the stove and turned her chicken so it wouldn’t burn. „I was very good and very cocky.“ Wishing for the cane he’d left upstairs, he moved across the kitchen, one hand on the countertop for support. „You want wine with this?“

She shook her head. „Water will be fine.“

„My father was a farmer and drove a cab at night. We were a good Catholic family. Five mouths to feed.“

„Only five?“

He turned and leaned on the counter, smiling at her wry wit. „There were others, but Ma either miscarried or they died soon after birth. My parents contributed nine souls to the parish in all. Ma was always philosophical about the ones she lost. She has an amazing faith.“ And he loved her for that. The realization warmed him even as he set his teeth to continue his story. „Anyway, there were five of us and Pop had to work double to keep us in clothes and shoes.“

„And dirt bikes,“ she said softly and he knew she understood how truly momentous that gift had been.

„And dirt bikes. Pop always wanted to be a history teacher, but he never got to go to college. He was determined all of us would go to college and one of us would be the history teacher.“

„He picked you.“

„Yes, but I wasn’t interested. The tug of fame had me and I wasn’t inclined to fight the pull. I loved the limelight, loved the adulation, the applause. I loved to play ball.“

„You were young, Max.“

„Don’t make excuses for me, Caroline,“ he said, more sharply than he’d intended. „You weren’t there. You can’t know. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to be terse. I knew my dad wanted me to play, but he also wanted me to have a backup… just in case. I thought he was a foolish old man, too unsophisticated to understand the real world, stuck on a farm in Illinois. He didn’t understand the world of fast money, fast cars.“ A ghost of a smile mocked. „Shoe deals. None of that mattered to him. He loved his family, though, and he and Ma wanted me to be happy.“

„So you played ball. Sweet sixteen, final four?“

„All four years. We were good.“ He shook his head, remembering it all. „We were also stupid. My buddies degreed in cop-out majors, because we weren’t there to study. We were there to play.“

He watched her brows furrow. „But your resume said you majored in history at UK.“

„I did. Made it through by the skin of my teeth. I showed up to class for the tests or if my girlfriend at the time was in the same class. I didn’t care about it. I think that hurt Pop more than if I’d majored in basketweaving instead. To have the opportunity and not use it…“ He sighed as he pushed himself away from the counter and placed two glasses of water on the table.

„So I graduated with the highest honor I could think of, MVP of my senior season,“ he said, his tone mocking. „Second round draft pick for the Lakers. I was on top of the world.“

„And your father?“

His laugh was without mirth. „Pop was so proud of me, he should have busted with it. He was worried, I could see, but proud just the same. He and Ma just didn’t understand my life.“ His voice dripped with sarcasm, all for himself. His jaw went taut. „I moved to LA, took up with a fast crowd. I didn’t make it home that first year, but I sent money. Paid off Pop’s mortgage.“

Caroline sat watching his face darken at that last revelation. Tentative, she tilted her head forward and verbally tiptoed. „So that wasn’t a good thing?“

He glared at her and she could feel the turmoil that churned in his gray eyes, gone harder than steel. „I hurt him. Sending him money when all that mattered to him was me. Paid off his mortgage like it was a big fucking deal. We fought over it. I thought he was ungrateful. He thought I didn’t love him anymore.“ His voice wavered and he cleared his throat. „God, that hurt. I never would have hurt my father, but I did.“