Double Dippin' (19 page)

“That’s how niggas get robbed. They be thinkin’ I’m twisted, but I be all up in they shit, taking everything,” Brick bragged.

More laughter followed and then Misty took out a sparkly tennis bracelet and solemnly handed it to Shane.

“Aw shit. This jawn is worth some money. That bling is about three or four carats, right, Misty?”

“Look at it real good, Shane. You know that dancin’ bitch can’t afford no real bling. Chips maybe, but not three or four carats.”

Shane held it in his palm as if weighing the bracelet. “It’s heavy; it’s blinging like crazy. It looks real to me.”

“Turn it over.”

Shane turned it over and shrugged.

“That shit is set in silver.” Misty sucked her teeth in disgust. “Real diamonds are not set in no damn silver. Fucking fake-ass bitch!”

“Well maybe we can sell it to some knucklehead who don’t know no better. How much you think we can get?” Brick asked.

“I don’t know. Let’s see what else is in here.” Misty rifled through the seemingly worthless pieces of jewelry. She held up a pair of diamond earrings. “These look real?” she asked, contemptuously.

“Damn, I don’t know. Just hand me the fuckin’ jewelry box,” Shane suggested.

Misty sucked her teeth and shoved the box toward Shane. He looked through
it and then, shaking his head in disgust, he gave the jewelry box back to Misty.

“So what did you get, Miss Know It All?” Brick asked.

“Man, I clipped that bitch in the backseat of the car last night.” Misty proudly held up a wallet and extracted two credit cards. “Now let’s go spend some money before that lap dancin’ ho wakes up and starts canceling these credit cards. Yeah, she’s gonna be madder than a muthafucker when she finds out how much Shane’s dick cost her.”

Headed for the Gallery Mall, Brick sped out of Germantown, Misty threw the jewelry box out the window.

“Whatchu do that for?” Brick asked, astonished.

“There wasn’t nothing but a bunch of worthless costume jewelry in there. The box was wooden; that should have told you something.”

“She ain’t have no gold chains or nothing in there?” Brick asked, obviously disappointed.

“She ain’t have nothin’ but a bunch of bullshit in there. But don’t worry, baby. We gon’ see how much she got on these cards. I hope she got enough for a shopping spree for all of us.”

Twenty minutes later, Shane and Brick hung out in the food court while Misty tested one of the cards at a woman’s boutique. She met up with them swinging two bags.

“Look at this greedy bitch, she done bought up the whole store.” Brick’s gruff voice carried, causing diners to turn their heads toward Misty.

“Okay, genius. Go ahead and bring a lot of attention to us.” Misty sat down and took a bite of Brick’s sandwich.

“So how much is on the cards?” Shane inquired.

Misty shrugged. “No way to tell unless I have her PIN number. But here’s how we can work it. Y’all can’t use a female’s credit card, so go look around and see what you like. Go in separate stores. Then come tell me and I’ll go make the purchases.”

Shane nodded.

“Sounds like a plan,” Brick agreed, bobbing his head up and down as he gobbled down his food.

The two men got up to do some window shopping. Misty stuck out her hand.
“Split the cash, Shane. I know you don’t think you’re keeping that hooker’s money all to yourself.”

“I did the work, didn’t I?”

“Oh, that’s how we’re playin’ now? Okay, I didn’t know the rules. But I’ll remember the next time y’all want me to lure some nut to a hotel or some dark alley somewhere. Uh huh. I’m sure gonna remember this shit.” There was no mistaking the threat behind Misty’s words.

Slowly, Shane pulled out the knot and gave Misty and Brick one hundred dollars apiece. “Y’all know I was just playin’.” He laughed sheepishly.

“I don’t know. You can be real shiesty when you wanna be.” Misty gave him a smile and hopped up from her seat. With her two bags hanging from the crook of her arm, she went to investigate the myriad of choices in the mall’s food court.

During the drive back to West Philly, the trio was exhausted. “Y’all feel like stopping for a minute so we can hollah at Wayne Gee?” Shane asked. Wayne Gee was a friend as well as their weed connection.

“We’ll have to hollah at the Gee man later,” Misty said, shaking her head. “I’m too tired to stop anywhere.”

There wasn’t much conversation until they got close to the house where Shane had been staying off and on.

The red pickup truck parked in the middle of the block indicated that Paula, Shane’s latest benefactor, wouldn’t be able to admit him into the premises. Unfortunately, her husband was home.

Misty sucked her teeth. “What’s that muthafucker doin’ home?” She sighed deeply. “Oh well, I guess you’ll have to come to our place. My mom’s at work. You can get some sleep until she gets off and then call that bitch Paula and see what’s up with her husband. Ain’t he supposed to be on the road driving an eighteen-wheeler?” Misty questioned Shane.

“That’s what I thought. Fuck it. I’ll call her later.”

Shane, Misty, and Brick piled their packages in Misty’s bedroom. Her mother didn’t like Brick staying there, and she’d made it abundantly clear that putting a roof over the heads of two male slackers was absolutely out of the question.

Misty locked her bedroom door. “Can’t have my nosey mother all up in our business.”

The three friends, too exhausted to undress, fell asleep in Misty’s queen-sized bed.

“Misty!” her mother yelled as she banged on her daughter’s bedroom door.

“What?” Misty sat up, cracked open an eye, and looked at the clock. The red digital numbers announced that it was 8:30 and the darkened bedroom was evidence that the day had turned to evening. “Damn,” Misty said, shocked that they’d slept so long.

“I know you and that Brick ain’t still laying up in that bed ’sleep. Get the hell up, Misty. Brick, you, too. Both of y’all get out that bed right the hell now.”

“Okay, Mom. But damn, you ain’t gotta be all loud and bangin’ on my door.”

“Who pays the bills around here?”

Misty sighed and rolled her eyes. “All right, Mom. We’re getting up now.”

“I’m getting ready to go get a drink around the corner at the bar. When I get back, I want y’all up, dressed, and out!”

Brick slept through the bickering and continued to sleep.

Shane woke up instantly, stretched his sinewy body, and cut his eye at the clock. He sat up and massaged his head. “Who got the weed?” Shane sat on the edge of the bed. “Damn, my whole body hurts; cramped up in this bed with you and Brick ain’t no joke.”

“Me? How much room did I take up?”

“I know you tiny and all, but you sleep wild and crazy. You be moving all over the place. And that big ox,” he said, pointing to Brick. “My arm is numb; feels like him and all his ten tons was laying on my shit all night.” Shane grimaced as he rubbed his arm. “I need some weed.”

“We didn’t stop and get none, remember?” Misty reminded him. “We’ll have to hollah at Wayne Gee later on.”

“Damn, I don’t like waking up with no weed,” Shane grumbled as he worked his hands upward and began to massage the top of his head.

Shane took out his cell phone and called Paula. When she picked up, he said, “Is your old man still at the crib? No? Well next time the plans change, hit me up on my cell; give me some kind of warning. That shit was fucked up.
Yeah, aiight. I’ll be over soon.” He paused. “Oh, now you trying to rush me? I’ll get there when I get there. Damn.”

“What did she say?” Misty asked when Shane hung up.

“Said her husband’s trip got delayed. But it’s cool, the muthafucker’s on the road now.”

“For how long?”

“I don’t know. Probably three or four days. I gotta take a shower. Did your mom leave yet?”

“I don’t know; let me check.” Misty unlocked the bedroom door. “Mom! Mom, are you still here?” She closed the door. “She must have left.”

“Aiight; I’m gonna take a quick shower.” They both cast a curious gaze at Brick, who had rolled over on his side.

Misty pulled open one of Brick’s eyes. It was unfocused as if he were dead.

“Come on; he’s out for the count. He took a couple Xanies on the way home. He ain’t waking up no time soon.”

Misty and Shane got in the shower together. “You know you gotta tighten me up before you go fuck that bitch.” She closed the shower curtain and turned on the water.

Brick startled them when he stumbled into the bathroom. With his eyes closed, he lifted the toilet seat and began to urinate. When he finished, he didn’t flush the toilet and he didn’t wash his hands. Like a zombie, he went back to the bedroom.

Misty and Shane, crouched in a corner as they hid from Brick, doubled over in laughter when he left. Misty’s drenched hair was plastered to her face.

“You look so beautiful right now,” Shane said in a tender voice. “I really don’t want to go over Paula’s.”

“I know you don’t, Shane, but we spent all the money. You gotta go get some more.” Misty washed Shane’s well-developed-shoulders and back. She handed him the washcloth, which he soaped up and gently washed her small breasts, and stomach, He stopped when he got to her groin. He placed the soap and washcloth on the plastic shower rack.

Misty put a foot up on the side of the tub as Shane delicately separated the folds of her vagina, got down on his knees, and licked it clean.

S
hane walked to a Chinese take-out restaurant located in a strip mall on the corner of Fifty-Eighth Street and Baltimore Avenue. He bought a ten-dollar bag of weed from one of the young hustlers standing outside the store, then went inside the take-out spot and slid a dollar into the opening of the bullet-proof partition. Pulling open the plastic bag, he inhaled the weed, smiled, and said to the weary-eyed Chinese merchant, “Gimme a green Dutch.”

Paula lived nearby on Ellsworth Street. Shane, on high alert, looked up and down the street for Paula’s husband’s truck before he approached the door.

Paula had on a short black, sheer mesh babydoll set with a sequined hem, cut high on the side to show off the matching thong. Ostrich feather-topped heels completed the sexy look. At thirty-eight, Paula’s body looked pretty good. Thick and womanly and soft in all the right places. Shane knew Paula dug having an eighteen-year-old in her bed. She couldn’t get enough of him.

The way she was all over him as soon as he crossed the threshold caused Shane to wonder if her forty-four-year-old husband probably needed a refill on his Viagra prescription.

“Damn, I missed you, baby,” Paula said, pressing against Shane. She craned her neck and kissed him hungrily. “Mmm, you smell good, too,” she murmured. “What’s that you’re wearing?”

“Mania by Armani,” Shane told her and smiled proudly. The cologne he wore was one of the purchases made using the exotic dancer’s credit card.

“I love a man who smells good.” Standing on her toes, Paula inhaled the fragrance.
Her lips brushed Shane’s neck. She lifted her chin in expectation of another kiss, but instead of kissing her, Shane cupped her face and looked into her eyes intensely. “You fucked up my schedule this morning. Don’t do that shit no more,” he chastised irrationally.

“I’m sorry, my husband had a change of plans.” She caressed Shane’s arm. “You want a drink?” she asked brightly.

“You got any St. Ides?”

“No,” she said with laughter. “I have vodka and rum. Do you want me to mix up something special for you?”

“Aiight. Go ahead. Hook me up. But I gotta keep my eyes on what you putting in it; can’t let you slip no Mickey in my drink.”

“The only Mickey I’d slip in your drink would be Spanish Fly.”

“What’s that?” Shane frowned. “It sounds nasty as shit.”

“Oh, something they used to put in girls’ drinks back in the day. Nowadays, they use Ecstasy.”

“Oh, what you know about E?” Shane asked, smiling. He liked that Paula was hip to the modern-day aphrodisiac.

“I’m only thirty-eight; I still keep up with what’s going on. You act like I’m seventy-eight.” She didn’t realize that Shane considered her ancient. Good looking or not, as far as Shane was concerned, Paula was an old-ass-broad.

While Paula mixed a concoction of vodka, rum, and pineapple juice, Shane got busy rolling a blunt.

“You gonna smoke with me?”

She wrinkled her nose up. “I would if you rolled it with regular rolling paper. I don’t think I’d like smoking a cigar.”

“You ain’t gonna hit this with big daddy?” he inquired, cocking his head to the side.

“Big daddy! Boy, you better stop talking like that if you want me to finish mixing this drink. You’re getting me so hot, my crotch is already wet,” she admitted with a coy smile. “And if you don’t stop giving me those sexy looks, I’m gonna be so weak, I’ll probably smoke ten blunts with you if it’ll make you happy.”

“Just being with you makes me happy,” Shane said, flashing a dazzling smile.

Blushing like an adolescent, Paula handed Shane a tall glass filled with the alcoholic mixture, took him by the hand, and led him upstairs to the bedroom she shared with her husband.

Shane sat on the side of the bed and lit the blunt. Paula sat on his lap and ran her fingers through his dark curly hair. She scratched his scalp lightly while kissing his cheek, but Shane didn’t return the affection. His lips were already occupied. Inhaling deeply, he puffed the blunt.