Dragonkin (14 page)

“You can’t leave me.”

Pain clutched her, and she bit back a scream from the poison taking hold.
“Don’t have a choice. I should have died a long time ago, but I survived. Now you have to go on without me.”

“You didn’t die because you were meant for me. I can’t let you go. I love you too much. You’re everything to me. Stay.”

All Kestrel wanted was to remain with him. She’d found her place in the world, but it just wasn’t possible. Andrik was growing dim. All she saw were fiery wings that opened to her. She reached out to them and felt him kiss her fingers, but it was far off. The pain had slipped away, and all that surrounded her now were flames. She tried to hold on to her love, but even that passed out of her grip. She was lifted higher. The great wings were attached to a massive dragon. They enfolded her in their grasp, and she began to burn with them.

Chapter Fifteen

Kestrel was aware of time moving forward, but not how much time. Thoughts and feelings were still her own, but she had no body. She lived within the large dragon, a small flame, being part of the whole. Her memories were there, but she didn’t have the emotional attachments she once had. It made her existence easier. But part of her was missing, the vital element that made her heart beat. Sleep didn’t plague her, and yet she was tired. Soon she found herself restless with all the other flames. Part of her journey wasn’t done.

“You have questions that there are no answers for.”

Kestrel heard the voice and knew it was the great dragon that she was part of. The flame that encompassed her floated out of the wings and burned before the beast. Its cobalt eyes gazed into the heart of her flame, deep into her soul, and she sensed the numerous other pieces the dragon was comprised of.

“Then why do I ask them? Why am I here if I’m not supposed to be?”

The dragon flapped its wings, and the landscape changed. Kestrel saw Blaze Mountain. They flew over it, circled lower and lower until she was standing in a chamber. A man stared out at the clouds. His sorrow overwhelmed her. She reached for him, but couldn’t touch him. The yearning to ease his hurt cut her. All she wanted was to soothe his pain. The scene changed suddenly. They zipped along corridors until they stopped in a large cavern. Along the floor were the bodies of dragons. In the center of the room was a raised platform. Kestrel recognized her body upon the slab. A thin layer of gauze covered her body. The dress she was in was nothing she had ever seen before. It wrapped around her neck, covered her breasts, and was tied at the waist. A golden torque with dragon heads at the ends lay around her throat. Over her heart was a thin scar. She touched her chest and remembered the fatal wound and poison that had killed her.

“Why bring me here and show me this when I can’t return there? You are not an unjust deity who would see me suffer.”

“Time has passed in your world. Time for the magic to work upon you. Time for the poison to be burned from your system and your wound to have healed. Time for you to become what you truly are. The transformation had only just begun that night. I have kept you here, a part of me, so you would not pass on into the great realm. I am a guardian. Those who pass through me are judged and find redemption in either the great realm or the hell of their own making.”

Kestrel stared at the dragon and then back at her body. Peering closer at it, she could see the blaze of fire burning underneath her skin. She sensed the magic pumping in her veins. It was more than being a dragonkin’s mate. It was something deeper, something that had begun when Castigan imparted part of himself to her.

“What does that make me now? Was it what Ralag said at the battlefield? Drakin? What does that mean?”

“It means ‘dragon warrior, riser from the ashes.’ Your destiny was much more than to suffer in silence from losing your first dragon. You have become the new generation. Dragons are a dying breed, and with each cycle, even the dragonkin numbers grow smaller. Soon there will be nothing left of the race. They will be human or spellcasters. Within you is born the new race of dragon and human. You are guardian. Mother. You will be all that is needed to protect the new generation when it comes time.”
The dragon craned its head and breathed a puff of air on her. A smile spread on its face, and she saw its sharp teeth.

“So I become something else from the magic and the dragon spirit that’s been given to me, but what do I tell him? What will happen?”

“That is for only the future to decide. Your life is ahead of you. Now go back to your mate. Share your wisdom and your life together. Be the seer for your people, and unite them all in a way you have yet to understand. Now go.”

He swept his wing, and before Kestrel could ask another question, she was thrown gently backward. She found she was lying on something hard. Everything about her was cold. She tried to warm herself, but it was difficult. The dragon flapped its wings once more. Once it did, it retreated, and she was warm again. Kestrel opened her eyes slowly. The gauze impeded her view. The warmth was returning to her limbs. It was hard to move her fingers and her toes. After flexing them a little, she was able to. Soon she was able to sit up. The shroud drifted from her and landed on the floor

She stared at her hands and then down at the dress she wore. Kestrel ran her fingers went over the torque and touched the teeth.
I’m alive. I’m alive, but how long was I gone?
Her scar was a pale ridge of flesh. Underneath it the fire burned inside of her. She slipped from the pedestal she was on and walked down the steps. Kestrel navigated through the other dragons and came to Castigan. She smiled and brushed her fingers over his snout. He was her past, and her future was waiting. Walking was almost ethereal for her. It was hard to believe that she was attached to her body again. All that mattered now was being with Andrik. His heart and hers were mirror images. Hers had been broken, and so was his.

She found the secret passage from the crypt to Andrik’s room. The mountain was quieter than she remembered. Something she couldn’t quite place lingered in the air. The wall swung open, but he wasn’t in his room. She crossed to his bedroom door and touched it. It swung open on quiet hinges. Kestrel bit her lip and stood in the threshold. The man she loved stood with his back to her, staring out the window. His muscles were knotted. His hair was braided along the sides and left loose in the back. He wore a black vest with a glint of gold woven into the fabric, leaving his arms bare. He wore thin trousers that matched. His tanned skin shone in the sun. She wanted nothing more than to go to him and tell him the miracle that had occurred, but she wasn’t sure how he would react. Before her was her mate. His heart was shattered. His soul was torn from his body, but he was strong and had survived. She stepped a little more into the room.

“I was not to be disturbed. My father is hardly cold, and now I am already losing the loyalty of my servants.”

Then it hit her.
That’s why he’s so tense. His father died
. The weight of her death, and then the king’s on top of that, was wearing down his soul. It made her heart ache even more to hold him in her arms, to tell him that she loved him, and be the balm to ease his suffering. She clasped her hands together and bit her lip.

“If that’s what my lord wishes, but I was hoping I could ease some of his ills.”

Andrik’s dark laughter echoed in the room. He didn’t face her. She took a few more steps across the room, hoping he would turn and see her, but he kept staring into the distance. “Nothing can relieve my ills. Not a good tumble. Not a pitcher of wine. Not all the jewels in this godsforsaken place. Nothing will ever cure me.”

She placed a hand on his back. His body shook from her light touch. He drew in a breath. “I’m sorry to hear that, my lord king. But maybe I can offer some sort of cheer. I have been known to soothe even the most ravaged of hearts.”

“What is cheer? Is there such a thing? I should be celebrating the new monarchy and that there is no war. That all dragons are living in peace. That those within the Athenaeum, or what’s left of it, are here wanting to learn the history of where they’ve come from. I should be overjoyed we are united at last.”

“If all my lord feels is the sorrow, like stones in his heart weighing him down, drowning so he can’t breathe, then his soul can’t find the wings he was born with.” She rested her forehead against his back and slid her fingers around his waist, feeling the hardened muscles underneath them.

“Yes. That’s exactly how I feel.” His voice dropped to a whisper.

“I know how my lord feels. I’ve felt the same way. Lost. Mourning the death of my dearest companion. It took me years to get over that shock, and yet I still wonder why the gods let me survive. And then, while I drew in my last breath, he was there for me. Begging me to stay with him. But I couldn’t. No matter how much I yearned to feel his soft touch again. To know that his heart beat even if mine was dying.” She rested her hand over his heart. She breathed in his heady scent again. His flesh was so warm she wanted to cry out from the joy of being near him once more, but he needed to turn around so that he could see her. “Don’t you want to know what I saw after I transitioned? Haven’t you dreamed about me?”

His hand covered hers, and he crushed it to his heart. “Evil temptress, be gone from me. She-devil, fly from this place, and remove yourself from my sight.”

“I’m no demon, my love. Please look at me.”

He shook his head. “No. Because once I do, you’ll be gone from my arms in smoke and flame. Another delusion brought on by my broken heart. By my tortured soul. I wanted to follow you into the abyss when you died, Kes. Ralag wouldn’t let me. I understand now how you felt when Castigan died. The emptiness. The bleakness that you suffered for so long. How did you survive so long? I only pray you’ll come back to me one day. Please go.” The hurt in his voice broke her heart. He released her hand and turned away. Kestrel sighed.

This time she went around to face him. He leaned over the window, gripping it with all his strength. Placing a hand on his cheek, she tried to turn his face to her. She wracked her memories to get him to look at her.

“With the wind under my wings, we’ll fly away. My fire burns hot and bright only to warm you in the night . . .” Her voice cracked at the last word in the phrase.

Andrik looked up and then stepped back. The disbelief he felt was written in his eyes. “Kes?”

She nodded. “Please don’t make me sing another bar. Singing was never one of my strong suits.”

He stepped a little closer, reached out to touch her, but then pulled his hand back. She took his hand and wound her fingers through it. Andrik gasped. “I can touch you.”

“It’s me, Andrik. Flesh and blood. I’m not a phantom come to torment you. I was sent back. The guardian called me drakin. Something about rising from the ashes.”

He caressed her cheek this time, and it felt like heaven. “Drakin is a myth among the dragons. A mother, a warrior, a guardian, one who comes to usher in a new generation. But you were dead. The knife. The poison. I don’t understand.”

“It took time for the magic to work upon my body. He kept me from moving on. Until you needed me and I was ready. How long?”

He engulfed her in his arms. Hearing his heartbeat was the best balm to heal her soul. “Two moons. Once we returned here, Father ceded the throne to me. He told me that his time had run its course and it was up to me now. To us. I told him you had died. He said you were only sleeping. I thought he was out of his mind. I didn’t know. I didn’t know.”

Kestrel pressed herself closer to him. This was home for her. “It’s okay. I’m here now. I’m not going anywhere.”

Her mate laughed, but she heard the disbelief in it. “You’re going to float away or turn to mist soon. I just know it.”

She gazed into his eyes, set her palms on his face, and drew his lips down to hers. Kestrel kissed him slowly. At first he didn’t respond, apparently still believing she was some figment of his imagination. But she called upon her power and felt it flare to life. It ran along her spine and centered above her heart. She pushed the warmth into her kiss so he could feel the fire burning inside of her.

Once the small flame touched her lips, he opened his mouth and wrapped her in his arms. He melted against her and crushed his lips to hers. He scooped her up in his arms. Their link flared to life. The warmth between them ignited into a blazing fire, and she finally felt right at home in her body once more. This was where she had belonged.

Andrik kissed her cheek, then slowly moved down her neck, touching every inch of her skin. She stepped away from him. He gave her a puzzled look, but she reached behind her and undid the clasp that held her dress. She let it drop to the floor in a pool of cloth around her. She took the torque off delicately and placed it on the cloth. She walked over to her mate and slid the vest from his shoulders. He didn’t fight her. Kestrel still felt the stunned feelings coming from him. She traced the lines of his muscles and went down to the healed burn scar that was now on his torso. The flesh had mended in swirls of skin. It only enhanced his look. She glanced up at him and then flicked her tongue over his nipple. It hardened in her mouth when she sucked on it and pulled it between her teeth. She slid her hands lower, encasing his engorged cock. She undid the tie that held up his trousers. Feeling his length was what she wanted.

Kestrel kissed her way down his stomach, flicking her tongue in circles over the ridges of his burn to the line of hair that directed her to her mate’s shaft. Taking him in her mouth, she slipped her tongue around the spongy head and was rewarded with a small moan. With her hands, she clutched his toned ass and began to draw him into her mouth slowly. The taste of him was smoky, too. She wrapped her tongue wrapped around his cock. She drew him in and out, creating a vacuum that soon had him thrusting his hips. His fingers wound through her hair and slipped over her face. She felt the muscles in his stomach clench.