Dreaming of Atmosphere (19 page)

Mal looked at me in irritation.

Why didn’t you tell us about the auto-defences before?
He texted.

I was going to activate them after you left in order to delay the synthetics and provide you with optimal probability of escape.

And now?

My prior assumption is obsolete. Activating defences in 11 seconds.

How long will they be delayed?

1 minute, 17 seconds. Uncertainty at 7%.

“Mal, how long til the deck hatch is open?”

“About a minute.” He called.

“About?”

“If you stop harassing me!”

Automatic defence system activated.

“Shit. Art, I’m moving up to Mal, we’ll fall back as soon as they come through. You’re on overwatch.”

She adjusted her position, drifting further back in the compartment. Our plan had changed. I was thinking fast. I grabbed a drifting console and hauled it between Mal and the compartment entrance. Artemis had finished moving back and was now positioned behind the pillar in the centre of the compartment. In my haste to move cover to Mal, I was having difficulty getting the console to remain stationary. I ended up holding it down on the deck and sending a nanite stream down to join the console to the deck by fusing the metals together. I was almost done when I noticed my charge icon start to flash. I accessed the menu and saw that my charge levels had dropped into the red. I’d pushed myself too hard. I hadn’t fully gained control over my nano-proliferation yet, and was exerting too much effort to produce my effects. I didn’t feel too bad, I just thought I was tired from the recent fight and the adrenaline spikes. Now I wasn’t so sure, maybe the adrenaline was masking a more serious condition that I was unaware of.

The cover would have to do, it wasn’t secured properly yet but I wasn’t going to risk passing out right before a fight.

“Here they come!” called Artemis.

I peeked over my cover and saw the bright flames of a plasma cutter slicing through Mal’s hasty weld. The hatch flew open and I could see several synthetics crammed in the security room behind it. I opened fire.

Almost at the same time as my energy bolts caught the first one on its shield two small explosions rocked the robot back. The shield winked out in a flash and bits of the synthetic flew apart. The eeriness of the silence that accompanied the violence was unsettling. The flashes of the explosions, caused by Artemis’ rocket projectiles, triggered a nervous twitching in my face. I dropped back behind the cover and couldn’t find it in me all of a sudden to pop back out. I could see Artemis leaning out from behind the pillar holding her pistol in a two handed grip sending out a steady barrage of fire. I looked at Mal, terror on his face as energy bolts landed around us. He was fumbling with the last few bolts on the deck hatch cover. I saw Artemis catch two rounds on her shield that rocked her back slightly, causing her aim to drift high. The cascade of enemy fire increased, they were using the slowing of rocket fire to advance, I was sure. I could hear myself hyper ventilating, and my helmet visor was starting to fog up.

“Pull yourself together, Seth,” I could hear myself saying, “Your squad needs you.”

I slowed by breathing, focusing on my gun in my hands.
One, two, three…

I swung around the side of the cover and let loose a three round burst at the nearest target. It was close, nearly a metre from me. The flashes from its shield winked out with the last round and I let out another three round burst. All three shots landed, taking its head from its mount and damaging an appendage. It went down.

”It’s open!” called Mal.

“Get in! I’ll cover you!” I shouted.

I watched him scrambled down the crawl space and then had to fall back as a rifle butt nearly crashed into my head. A synthetic was drifting over the cover, but the force of its blow sent it tumbling towards the deck head above. I pushed off the console and used my momentum to fly back towards the next line of cover I’d constructed. As I drifted I turned my body to face backwards, then let fly a barrage at the stranded synthetic. My rapid fire quickly overloaded the shield and destroyed it.

When I reached the next line of cover I magnetised by boots once more and scrambled to the other side. I glanced at Artemis and saw her moving further back and snapping off shots without aiming.

“Are you hit?” I asked.

“A little, I’m good. Watch your flank.”

I turned and saw a pair of synthetics trying to get around me. I fired at them and they retreated, but not before one of their shields winked out. I peeked around my cover to get a feel for the battlefield. As the compartment was circular, we’d formed our rows of cover in concentric circles. We were occupying the rear quarter of the circle, separated by about ten metres. We were further back than I’d hoped this early in the fight. We didn’t have any more cover to fall back to, and now the enemy was using our cover against us. We had to go on the offensive or we’d never get back to the hatch.

“I’m going to try to get back to our first line, tell me when they get up to our second barricade!” I called

She fired off a few more rounds and the fell back. I could see her reloading her pistol with a clip from her suit. She nodded at me. We both popped back around in unison and hammered a pair of synthetics trying to advance on Artemis, destroying them both.

“I got maybe twenty more shots left!” She called. I wouldn’t be enough. I had to make my move now. I made to vault the cover I was behind, pushing off the deck hard. I flew forward and up, firing downwards as I sailed over the enemy line. I saw one synthetic crumple beneath my barrage and another shield wink out before I was directly above the first line of consoles we’d gathered. There were still a few synthetics using this row as cover. I pushed off the deck head and sailed downwards as several bolts smashed into my MAEL suit. I could hear their impact as dull thuds and felt the heat from their energy. The suit held though.

I turned and fired at the nearest synthetic in this line, realising that I had enfiladed three of the enemy. I continued my barrage as the first one fell, then started on the next two, rocking my fire back between them in succession. They managed to get off maybe three or four shots before they both went down.

”Circle round! To me!” I ordered.

I popped back around the consoles to continue my attack, but my gun was empty. I ducked back and popped the battery, jamming a fresh one into the handle. When I popped back out I saw Artemis dashing between cover, and shots were hammering into her shield. In a bright flash it popped and sent her tumbling into the rear bulkhead. I unloaded a fresh torrent of bolts at the nearest few synthetics to her, they tried to duck back around their cover but they were exposed and I manage to destroy two before the others started shooting at me and sent me back down again. I could feel a numbness in my right arm, and was having trouble catching my breath. My suit was registering a breach in my torso and I peeked down at my chest to see a blackened hole directly over my sternum. I was wondering at when I’d taken that hit when Artemis slid into the cover next to me. She looked at me with wild eyes.

“Now what? I’m out!” she called.

As luck would have it, I was behind the loosely secured console. I latched my boots on the deck and pushed with my shoulder, tearing the console free and letting it drift backwards, towards the rear of the compartment. I could feel shots hitting the other side of the console, their impacts vibrating through the metal. I pushed the console until it had gone over the deck hatch, and gestured for Artemis to come to me.

“Art! Go down! I’ll cover you!”

She nodded and slid towards me, narrowly avoiding several bolts. She pulled herself head first into the deck hatch, and I was down right behind her. I went in feet first and pulled the console over the hatch opening. I reached into my utility pouch, where my shield generator would normally be on an M4 MAEL suit, and retrieved a small plasma welder. I then hastily welded the console to the deck as best I could and started to pull myself backwards through the crawl space. It was easier said than done. The M4 was bulky, and slightly inflated. Although the torso segment had deflated when I was hit, it had automatically sealed itself and was reinflating. I was getting snagged on things I couldn’t even see. Claustrophobia was starting to mingle with the fear of combat, and my PTSD was an ever present pressure on my mind, threatening to overcome me. When I’d only gone a few metres down the space I saw the console covering the hatch tear free and a metal head reached down inside. I shot madly at it, my E2S held over my head covering me. It was only a brief satisfaction to see the head explode in sparks and metal bits.

The synthetics started to poke barrels into the space and fire blindly. Bolts were smashing all around me, sending debris flying all around chaotically. I was starting to hyperventilate again. A piece of metal pipe struck my visor and I saw a spider web crack appear. Another piece knocked my E2S out of my hands and it trailed in front of me on its sling. All I could do was hold my hands over my head and I started to panic. A bolt struck my left forearm, and it
hurt
. My overlay told me I had a suit breach on my forearm segment, but I ignored it. I could hear a loud yelling over my comms before I realised it was me.

Suddenly, I saw lightning shooting between the crawl space sides, arcing outwards towards the hatch opening, where several rifle barrels were killing me. I was blinded by the light of a brilliant flash and then a dead calm settled over the crawl space.

Then I blacked out.

22.

I drifted through the dark ocean of data once more. I was a mote of light, just below the surface, one of the trillions of glowing nano-plankton of information. I darted between the other data motes, swimming in the warm thick soup of probability. A dark form appeared before me and I saw a fish made of ones and zeros swallow me, and then I
was
the fish. I swam and I swam, but I was not as fast as the shark the caught me and became me. I stalked the sea and caught the scent of knowledge in the waters. I followed it, coming upon an island of doubt. I saw a figure standing on the island, and it was speaking to me.

“One day, when all this is over, I’ll return to the university on Kanto Prime.”

This confused me. I was enraptured by the voice, it was somehow familiar, but unknown at the same time. It went on.

“I originally thought I’d end up specialising in Bio-Augs, but now I’m not so sure. Seth’s NP is fascinating, and I’m considering focusing my remaining studies on nanite research.”

Another figure rose out of the sands, wreathed in disappointment. It joined the first and began to speak as well.

“I’m sure whatever you put your mind to you’ll do well. We’re lucky to have you here. I wanted to thank you for helping Seth with his problem.”

“Oh, it’s no problem. It’s really good to be using my skills, I’m finally doing what I’ve been studying for all these years. It’s really me who should be thanking you.”

“You’re a gem, Zoe. That boy’s got a thick head on him, and you’re doing him a world of good. Do you two plan on anything long term?”

“I’m not sure. I don’t even know if he wants something long term. We’re…taking it slow at the moment. Because of the nanites.”

“How are you feeling about that?”

“I understand why, but we’re always so close, it’s hard not to want him with me.”

“Ah…young love. It’s always like that, you know?”

“Is this what love is?”

“Sure. I used to date his father, did he tell you?”

“Really? No, he never talks about his dad.”

“We were both young, like you two. I was caught up in the image of the dashing starship Captain, making a name for himself in the galaxy. Caster Donovan, the best bounty hunter in the Eridani System! He was a lot like Seth.”

“What happened?”

“He got himself shot. Stupid mistake. Tried to break up a bar fight and he got killed by one of the brawlers. Seth was only a boy when it happened. I had to tell him, poor thing.”

“Where was his mother?”

“She…she was never in the picture. I don’t even know her.”

“That’s sad.”

“We were always there for him, or at least we tried to be. Eric and I are the only two who are left from Caster’s old crew. Everyone else either died or left for various reasons. I tried to make sure the ideals that Caster lived by were instilled in the boy, but I’ve always doubted myself. I’m not his mother, or his father, just a crew member who he grew up with.”

“He loves you, Maxine. You’re the closest thing he has to family.”

“The cheeky bastard is listening to us.”

I realised then who I was, and that I was alive and waking up. I could feel the uncomfortable med lab bunk below me. A splitting headache was doing its best to break my skull in two. I was groggy, and I could feel several areas of my body that were doing their best to outdo the headache in pain. A finger lifted one eyelid and flashed a pen light into my eye. I recoiled from the piercing light and tried to bat the pen away from my face but strong hands grabbed them and shoved them down. My other eye was treated to the same attempt at blinding me for life.

“He’s lucid, barely.” Came Zoe’s voice.

I could feel the bunk shifting as someone sat on the mattress.

“How do you feel?” came Max’s concerned voice.

“Murmledurf.” I mumbled.

“Drink this.” Zoe tilted my head back and put a cold cup to my lips. I sipped feebly at the liquid, bitter and sweet at the same time.

“Whaddapend?” I almost sounded legible again.

“You had a seizure. You pushed your nanites too much and they took too much from you.”

“Had to. Lifendef”

“So I hear. You’re very lucky. Fel found the Coil Wraith and Crege managed to get the Dreaming through the debris field close enough for Fel to beam it into pieces.” Explained Max at the end of the bunk.”

“Dya get da bomb?” I muttered.

“No we used the
beamer
.” Insisted Max. I went to ask her again about the bomb, but she squeezed my leg and I manage to open an eye in askance. “
Artemis
made it out. So did Mal and his cargo.”

I heard a distance voice, from the other side of the med lab where the other bunk was. “We got lucky, lover boy.” Said Artemis, “When the Coil Wraith got iced the synthetics lost their brain and just collapsed.”

“What she doing here?”

“She tore her wound open in the fight. Took a few hits too.”

“My chest.”

“You caught a solid hit right on your sternum. Titanium plate coped a bit of heat but only superficial burning from the direct hit. We’ve got a nanite skin patch working to repair the synth skin over it. It will itch, so try not to scratch it.”

It did itch, I tried to scratch it but Zoe slapped my hands away.

“You took several hits to your forearms, your suit took most of the damage but your cyber-arm will need to come off for repairs. I’m making a nanite bath for it now.” She said.

“Off?”

“It won’t hurt, but I can’t do it while it’s still attached, the nerve fibres will burn out your neuro-shunt if I try.”

“Okay. Tac?”

Max answered this. “It’s with Fel. He’s secluded himself in his cabin since Mal gave it to him. That’s some treasure you’ve found.”

“What is it? It’s some special AI isn’t it?”

“Very. One of a kind, I think. It was the reason the Espers attacked the Veng ship.”

“Is Mal okay?”

“Not a scratch on him.”

“Lucky bastard.”

“Not lucky. He had a very good guardian. You did well.”

“Thanks, Max. It was touch and go there at the end.”

“I’ll own that, Seth. I shouldn’t have sent you guys in, it was risky and we have enough on our plate without inviting more trouble.”

“Worthwhile risk. I needed the action with my NP before we go into Gossamer. I needed to know how I can use them.”

“And?”

“I’m impressed. If only I don’t always end up with a headache like this? Can you give me anything, doc?”

Zoe chuffed. “Can’t do. Besides the wisdom you’ll gain contemplating the consequences of overdoing yourself, the risk the painkillers will mask the onset of another seizure is too great. All I can offer you is a mild analgesic.”

“I’ll take two.”

Maxine patted my leg affectionately and left with orders to get better and Zoe gave me two tablets that I struggled to swallow. She took a few more readings and then set about removing my cybernetic arm. A few probes with her fingers and a few tools poking into my synthetic skin and the arm came free with a wet sucking noise. She carried it over to a workbench and started her repairs. It was such a horrible sensation, the sudden loss of weight. I felt like I was half a person and was unbalanced lying down. I heard Artemis chuckle on the other side of the med lab.

“You know, wish I could have done that back on the wreck. Would have made it a hell of a lot easier to drag you out of that crawl space.”

“You got me out?”

“With Mal’s help. That man complains more than anyone else I know.”

“Tell me about it.”

“He cut a section of the deck plates out and had to pull you feet first through the crawlspace to get to you. I saw your M4 MAEL suit. There’s no shield generator.”

“Don’t like them.”

“I saw you use a shield in there.”

“Yeah, another of those sexy tricks.”

“Miniature portable?”

“Nano-proliferation.”

“Huh. That explains the whole ‘Seth has the flu’ bullshit the other week.”

“Yeah, figured we could use the edge.”

She was silent for a few moments, and I was about to try and sleep when she started again.

“This changes a few things.”

“How do you mean?” I tried to sound annoyed. I really wanted to sleep.

“I’ll tell you when the time comes. For now, everything is going well.”

I tried to laugh at her concept of going well, but only ended up making my head explode in pain. I groaned a few times and rolled over. It felt so weird not having my arm. Thankfully I fell asleep in no time.

I awoke again some time later, Zoe was shaking me lightly. She had my arm on a tool cart beside her, along with a few tools.

“It’s ready. Roll over and I’ll re-attach it.”

I was still groggy, but the headache had cleared at least. I could feel my other injuries rather acutely though. I complied and she started to activate the cybernetic connections in my shoulder once more, and like old lovers my arm and joint connected again. I felt whole. She made a few adjustments with her tools, and patted my arm when she was done and smiled at me.

“Good as new. How do you feel?”

“Like a new man.” I lied, trying to sit up. She helped up when she saw me wincing. I could see that Artemis had left the med lab while I slept.

“We’re alone.” She said.

“Good. I wanted to talk to you.”

“I’m listening.” She said as she rubbed my arm.

“When I was in the hulk, I almost had another attack.”

“Your PTSD?”

“Yeah.”

“Tell me about it.” She sat on the bed beside me and assumed the pose that she usually did when she was being a professional listener. I’d seen it many times and it meant that she was taking what I said seriously, and would analyse it and apply her training to what I said.

“We’d already had an engagement, it was brief but very violent. I had no trembles, no shaking or tunnel vision. Then when we had to make a stand in the computer room where we found Tac…”

“Tac?”

“The AI Core we rescued. The Esper synthetics were after it, I think. They had us pinned in the compartment, so we assembled a quick battle plan to delay them while the Dreaming got into position to help us. Right before the start of the fight, our plan got thrown out the window due to a change in circumstances, and the synthetics hit us while we were still getting prepared. It was touch and go, right off the bat. I don’t know what happened, I suddenly froze and started hyperventilating.”

“What shook you out of it? We’ll deal with what may have triggered it after we talk about this.”

“I’m not sure exactly. I saw that Mal and Art were in trouble, that if I did nothing there was a good chance they were going to die. I just sort of got over it, I guess. Controlled my breathing and reassessed my position. I was fine after that.”

“That was good news at least. You managed to overcome the attack through force of will. Your subconscious no longer holds complete control over your mind, and you’re slowly teaching it that you don’t need it’s protection. It’s beginning to trust you with your own mind again.”

“You think I’m getting better? I had another attack, though.”

She poked me in the chest. It
hurt.

“Ouch! Why’d you do that?”

“That pain, does it mean that your chest wound is getting better or worse?”

“Neither. I know it’s getting better, but it still hurts!”

“That’s my point. Your mental wounds are healing, they still hurt when they’re poked, but we know they’re getting better.”

“Okay, I see your point.”

“The fact that it wasn’t an external stimulus that snapped you out of the attack this time means you’re improving. Your own conscious mind did this. Because you wanted it to. I think what triggered it wasn’t the battle, but that you had your mind set on a plan, and it was taken from you before your mind could recover and formulate a new one.”

“I don’t know, the first time we were attacked it was an ambush.”

“But you weren’t setting into a plan then. It’s kind of like when you’ve been doing maths for half an hour and suddenly someone asks you to catch a ball. Your mind isn’t prepared for it, but I bet if they’d asked you an equation you’d still be able to answer it quickly.”

“Are you saying that my mind was already thinking it was in control, and when that rug was pulled out from under me my PTSD was waiting underneath?”

“You build comfort from familiarity, from being in control and falling back on your training. A lot of that comes from your subconscious too, like muscle memory. Relying on it helps free your conscious mind up for other things, but in this case I think you got disconnected a little. Don’t worry, I still believe you’re making progress. Don’t consider this a slip backwards. I don’t.”

“It feels like it to me.” She put her arm around my neck and kissed me on the cheek.