Dreams of the Forgotten (6 page)

"I don't remember," Stan confessed.
"Neither do I," Jory whispered.
"How often did you see Xzavier?" There was compassion in Ushna's voice, but his arm around me tightened.
"We see him several times a year," Jory's voice broke as he replied. He stared hard at his clasped hands.
It was disturbing how easily they were able to separate the five of us. Stan and Jory had been befriended and betrayed. I wasn't sure the three had sex. It sounded too much like a date rape scenario and the persistent memory loss implied the use of drugs. Why did Xzavier continue to visit? Who would expend all of the time and energy to keep in touch?
Ushna tensed as he asked the next questions. "Did you tell him where you were going?"
"No we didn't get a chance," Stan replied. "Jory was in New York on a project until four days ago and I worked on making arrangements to move our business base." Stan's hands rested on top of the table, clenching and unclenching with obvious tension.
"Is this person a part of your current tribe?" I asked with suppressed fury. We needed to find and contain the person who'd kept my brothers from me.
"No, he belongs to the Kislah Tribe."
I placed the necklace with the eight-pointed star pendant on the table between us. "Have you seen this before?"
Stan slammed his fist onto the table. "Son of a bitch!"
"I think I am going to be sick." Jory covered his face with his hands.
There was no way to lessen the impact of what I had to say. "This is the emblem Ashur pulled off the body of an assassin."
Jory scraped his chair back and bolted from the room. With as delicate as my stomach was, I ignored the sounds of Jory heaving into the toilet down the hall.

The meeting to plan our trip to Georgia was long and tedious. There was an upset at both the Magi College and the Warrior Order. Corey had sent men to investigate. He placed the visit on hold until he received the reports and was able to guarantee my safety.

I had warned Jory and Stan to attend the meeting only if they decided to stay and that was after they had negotiated some kind of cease-fire with Gregori. When they entered the conference room together, they weren't chummy but Gregori's hostility had toned down.

Security for the trip would be a nightmare but Corey had made use of Stan's and Jory's expertise. They owned a well-known and respected security firm,
Wolf at the Door Protection
. Jory was the expert with equipment and electronics, and Stan was a wizard with planning and strategy. Between the two of them, they were a formidable team.

It was decided I'd make two trips to Bahbelle. The first was to appoint an alpha to replace Theodore Sullivan and to settle the estate for his three children. I had to attend the trial for the followers of Craig Stoiler for the illegal invasion of my territory and the attempted murder of my tribe. Then I would secretly meet with the Elder Council. We needed to address the issue of the spy and declare my lineage.

We also addressed the security issues of my own tribe and territory. The guard had grown from the original fourteen warriors to over one hundred warriors, with more who arrived every day to petition entry. The warriors alone made my tribe the largest outside the three safety zones.

With the rapid growth, I'd promoted Corey Bahar to Arms Master, and he in turn, elevated four warriors who had given a Blood Oath to captains. Juan Ybarra, Samuel Mercer, Michael Wayne, and Helios Tahirah were each responsible for a contingent of men.

"So how do you know these new warriors are loyal?" Corey gave me a look of triumph when Stan asked the question.

"Thank you! Maybe he'll listen to you." Corey explained the Blood Oaths of the original fourteen.
I glared. This was an ongoing argument between Corey and me. "Together we review the applications of the warriors. Blood Oaths are very draining and I would only be able to do a few at a time. Since I'm pregnant, we decided to forgo that vow. As a compromise, Corey and I meet the new applicants outside so I can look at them through the Earth. I haven't come across any whose intensions are questionable. If the warrior passes both of our assessments, with Gregori's assistance, I take their Oath of Fealty and then an Oath of Secrecy. They're bound to me, but not as tightly as Corey wants them to be."
Corey huffed out a breath of frustration. "There are too many new faces. I'd rather they swear a Blood Oath."
"Not every Lycan is in league with the
Servants of the Glorious One
," Ushna reasoned. "I trust what Tristan glimpses of them. You want absolutes, Corey."
"How can I not?" Corey moved his blond braids off of his shoulder when he reached for the back of his neck. "With so many new faces, the number growing every day, we're going to slip up, and someone will see you without the ring of illusion… how do we keep them from saying something to the wrong person?"
I understood Corey's worry. "So far, I haven't made a mistake. After the pups are born, we'll announce my lineage. That's only two months away at the annual Alpha Sanctuary meeting. I'll continue to be cautious. If I am seen, they've already sworn an Oath of Secrecy. You'll pull them aside and remind them of their vow but I don't think that you'll have to."
"I'm not so much concerned over the warriors seeing Tristan pregnant as I am over the rumors these men bring with them," Jory said. He reclined in the chair and balanced on the two back legs. "You said these men come with stories of priests. You'd think their appearance at the Order of Anat compound would cause talk of some kind. It's big news, especially among the warriors."
Jory pointed at the laptop sitting in front of him. "Not a word. If what you've been told is true, and the priests are heralding the return of the true Lycan King, then there would be chatter."
Stan riffled through some reports Corey had given him. "All of the accounts given indicate the warrior didn't speak of the priest or their message to anyone but Tristan. In every report, it's the same. The priest approached a warrior and told him, "
If you seek justice and wish to serve The Law then seek out the clear waters of Oklahoma
." After the conversation, the warriors claimed they were aware of where they needed to go."
I remembered the way the new warriors had stared at me. I wondered if they suspected who I was. If so, they kept it to themselves.
Jory let the chair fall forward and started typing with quick, precise key strokes. "As far as I can tell, the priests haven't mentioned you or Ushna by name. It's hard for me to believe the assassins don't know or suspect. Between the Warrior Order and the Magi College, someone has to put things together. Hell, Tristan, you sent Caspian's head back to the Master Magi of the Triad, Kevah Khortdad, with a note. Signed, sealed, and delivered. Who in their right mind would challenge him like that?" Jory gave me a huge grin.
Stan glanced up at me. "That by itself wouldn't have been an issue. Alphas are arrogant, they take the security and safety of their tribes seriously. But include the public arrest of the captain responsible for approving the fake orders, and Caspian's body had been hung in the college courtyard, and then the arrival of the priests. All it would take is one person asking the right questions, and we could have assassins coming out of the woodwork."
Corey passed Stan and Jory another report. "General Shay Thomlain hasn't called Tristan to apologize for his warriors invading claimed territory illegally."
I couldn't help but smile at Corey's disgruntled tone. He was a warrior, not a politician. He wasn't tactful on his best days and Goddess help you if you pissed him off. Corey was deeply offended at the general's lack of regard for me, and the situation had put the officer at the very top of Corey's ugly list.
We talked long into the evening. By the time the meeting had convened, I was dead tired. Ushna had left the meeting a half hour earlier. All I wanted to do was locate him and cuddle in bed before I passed out.
I swung by the kitchen and grabbed a huge glass of milk on the way to the bedroom. When I opened the door, I thought I'd died and gone to heaven. There in the middle of the bed lay Ushna with a jar of maraschino cherries and a super-sized bag of cheese puffs. I quickly closed and locked the door behind me.
Ushna was naked with only a sheet discreetly covering him as he lounged on a pile of pillows, legs spread suggestively, with five or six cherries resting on his stomach. I feasted on him, my stare taking in his long lean form. Muscles corded and rippled as he moved. His blueblack hair covered his brow. Emerald eyes ringed with my color of golden brown sparkled as he watched me.
He had such great lips. I'd had many fantastic fantasies simply about kissing those lips. His sculpted chest had a dusting of hair that tapered to a thin line that led down the center of his stomach to his groin. The white Caduceus with its iridescent scales and red eyes stood out against his tan skin. I'd been working with Ushna, teaching him songs of the Earth. He and Gregori were learning to heal from Ashur as well. The Albino snakes weren't pure white anymore but had hints of blues and greens when he moved.
Every day with this man, my hunger for him grew.
A low seductive growl rumbled in Ushna's chest. "The way you look at me… if you don't hurry up and get over here…"
"Promises, promises," I murmured as I unhurriedly took off my clothing.
Ushna followed my every move. His gaze caught fire, following my hands as they traveled over my body. Shirt off, my palm grazed down my chest, stroked my stomach, down to my pants releasing the tie. A low rumble rose in volume the closer my hand came to my boxers. He gripped the covers to keep from moving as I ran my thumb under the waistband of the underwear before I, little by little, pushed them down.
Crawling onto the bed, I kissed the inside of his ankle, up to his knees, caressing the back of his legs, and stroked up his thighs. His breath came faster as I licked and sucked up a small mark in the groove between Ushna's hip and groin. I inhaled his scent, strong with musk as I licked my way up to his stomach. The five little cherries sat waiting for me, small pools of juices surrounding them.
My craving for the little candied fruits was beyond explanation. I'd planned to eat them slowly with sly seduction, but in a blink of an eye, they were gone. I was licking the last of the flavors off of Ushna's stomach when I spied a small brown disk, all pert and pebbled. I kissed my way up and wrapped my lips around it, tonguing and sucking. Ushna's hands abandoned the sheets, one barely cupping my ass and the other went to the back of my head, holding me to him as he exhaled roughly.
My name fell from his lips and sent a shiver down my spine. I loved how he said my name, like it was precious, important. I licked my way up his chest, loving the feel of fine hair passing under my tongue. I couldn't lie on Ushna because of my stomach so I straddled his body with mine as I made my way up to his neck then ran my tongue over his stubbled chin before I kissed his lips.
I had planned for a slow and seductive caress but he was impatient. He devoured me as he slanted his lips across mine. He took my breath into him, inhaling me, and I submitted to his mouth and tongue, stroking him with mine in return, opening wider, inviting him in farther and tasting him.
Carefully, I moved to lie on my side facing him and threw my leg over his hip. We lay there looking into each other's eyes. I loved that I put that expression on his face, the one of pure unadulterated happiness. There was nothing—and I mean nothing—I wouldn't do for this man. He gave me another slow languid kiss.
Since I had become pregnant, the urge to claim Ushna for my own had intensified. Sometimes it was hard to believe he was mine, handsome strong Ushna, my best friend, my right hand, the love of my life. I never wanted to be without him. Even though I knew he wasn't my Twin Flame, I had to walk carefully because the predator deep within me wanted to claim him and bind us together for an eternity of incarnations.
But I couldn't—I wouldn't allow that to happen.
I'd never steal him away from Brian, his soul's Bashert, and because of that, I'd probably spend the rest of my incarnations alone and unclaimed.
Ushna and I had a strong connection before he became my lover. In a fantastic way, the love we had for each other had us entwined together, nearly balanced but not quite. Then he had become my consort and the magic tied us together more tightly. It tethered him to me so I could find him if he wasn't too far away. There were times when I touched him and I swore I perceived his emotions as if they were my own.
All of this only spurred on this part of me that wanted, needed, to be bonded completely with his soul. I felt unsure and incomplete. My predator pushed forward when we had sex, making its desires known to me. It was a constant battle to hold onto and control that part of myself.
Once, not so long ago, I had come close to claiming Ushna. I submitted control over to him and I ended up having the best sex of my life but it was also a reminder of the thin edge I walked with him. I wouldn't let him down. I'd retain control of myself. I prayed the Gods would have mercy on me when my time came. I didn't want to walk the world alone.
Along with the strong urge to bind Ushna to me, I'd had these strange moments of déjà vu. I'd never said anything to him but I wondered, with each reincarnation, where do our life experiences go? Does our memory reset with each birth? Did they stay with the soul but we were denied access to them?
Since then there were moments when I stared at him and I saw other faces overlay his. I believed—crazy as it might be—I'd known all of them. If I had, were the faces I saw images of who Ushna once was? Did it mean he'd been my friend, my lover, or in some way a part of my life in times past? What about Brian? He couldn't have been gone for all of the incarnations. Had we always been friends? Had I been Brian's lover, possibly a lover to both of them?
The worst part was I couldn't tell Ushna what I thought I saw. Where would I begin? Could it be explained rationally and be believable?
I wished this small craziness was merely a side effect of male pregnancy. These visions were coupled with haunting dreams, added to the push from my predator to claim Ushna, and it seemed like I might be going crazy. I endeavored to hold myself together, focus on the things we needed to do, but sometimes it didn't seem to be enough.
Would a side effect of the broken binding spell and the urge to claim Ushna eventually go away? If it didn't, I might be forced to reveal all of this to Ushna. It seemed the further along I was in the pregnancy, the more I fought myself. My instinct and my logical mind clashed as I held onto control.
He pulled me into his arms and I absorbed his strength. I would be utterly lost without this man.