Dropped Third Strike (Portland Pioneers #1) (17 page)

Now, with his gaze on her, it was hard to think about shutting him out. Those eyes were just too compelling. For a few moments, she just looked back at him. Whatever expression she wore was effective. He finally looked away, but not before giving her a small smile that sent a warm jolt down her spine. She quickly looked back at her computer screen, trying to shake the sensation and refocus on her work.

When the plane landed, Kate braced herself for yet another tense conversation with Reid. Instead, he walked by her without a word and boarded the bus that would take him and several of the players back to their vehicles at the ballpark. Kate gathered her bags and waited for a cab, relieved she wouldn’t have to stave off Reid anymore that night. She was tired and ready to be home again.

Kate loved the modern, two-story home she’d purchased shortly after starting her job with the Pioneers. Full of craftsman charm, it was the best of old-world style and modern conveniences, and she’d decorated in classic, muted colors to highlight the gorgeous woodwork throughout.

The first floor was wide open and arranged in a way that felt cozy despite the expansive square footage. When Kate entered from the two-car garage, she walked into a kitchen equipped with top-level appliances that didn’t get nearly enough use. Kate was a decent cook, but she didn’t have a lot of time to explore those talents. A year earlier, she’d added a deck, which was accessible from the kitchen, and she hoped to find time to use it more in the near future. The living room was just a few steps away, with large windows overlooking the side yard, which was lined with a fence and trees. It was a gorgeous view, particularly in the winter when Kate enjoyed a glass of wine on the plush sectional couch in front of the fireplace while watching Christmas movies on the Hallmark Channel. At the front of the house was a welcoming porch with a wide front door that opened to the foyer, which divided the living room and formal dining room. The latter held a solid oak table big enough to comfortably seat twelve. Kate had only used it twice since she moved in, but she kept it set with her favorite china and stemware. On the left side of the foyer, next to the living room entryway, was an oak staircase leading to the second floor, which was home to two guest rooms, a bathroom, and Kate’s master suite. Her bedroom, painted in a grayish purple and decorated with floral artwork, was decidedly feminine and a sharp contrast to her business persona. The floors were the same oak that ran through the rest of the house, and a plush dark purple throw rug provided padding each night as she climbed under a dark purple comforter on a queen-sized iron frame bed. The adjoining five-piece bathroom was done in the same color scheme, and her spa tub got plenty of use year-round. There were touches of indulgence throughout, but the overall theme of the home was simplicity and comfort. To her, it was perfect. Best of all, it was all hers. She’d never felt more adult or more successful than the day she signed the papers on her home and unlocked the door for the first time.

She didn’t get to spend as much time in her home during the season, but that was actually a blessing in disguise. She found that when she was home for any extended length of time, loneliness would begin to creep in. Even with a good movie or music turned on, the house felt too quiet and too big. That’s when she would become acutely aware of her singlehood. Her home seemed to be missing something or someone. But those feelings were fleeting, and she always managed to chase them away. She knew there were worse emotions in the world. She had experienced them plenty in her life. She would take isolated and lonely over hurt and betrayed any day. And every day for the rest of her life. She was fine alone. Better than fine, even. She was convinced of that. Or at least she would continue trying to convince herself of that.

She kept busy with work during the baseball season, and indulged in as much travel as her schedule would allow. Each year, between the last game and winter meetings, she would visit some new, exciting destination. Usually, she chose one that required a few bikinis, but every now and then, she’d go somewhere with rich history and culture so she could truly get lost in another world. Wherever she went, she always made a conscious effort to leave work behind – except in the case of emergencies – so she could truly clear her head. This made it easier to jump back into work when she returned.

Kate could certainly use that kind of clarity now. She hadn’t managed to find time for a vacation over the winter, and it was catching up with her. A trip now was out of the question, so she sank into a tub full of lavender-scented bubbles instead. In addition to washing off the travel dirt, she hoped the aromatherapy would help her unwind and find sleep easily. Her mind was so cluttered, even more so than usual, and she suspected it would stay that way for the length of Reid’s employment with the Pioneers. Particularly if he insisted on bringing up their past every time they talked. Dodging his questions and resisting his charms for an entire season would be exhausting if not impossible. She was already worn out, and there was still plenty of season ahead.

Chapter Seven

Opening Day is a holiday for every baseball fan. Even bigger than Christmas Day for some. It signifies the end of a long, cold winter and the beginning of what many hope to be a long and happy season. The first game in April serves as a fresh start for every club and a milestone for every rookie. On this day, the sun seems to shine a little brighter, the air feels clearer, and there’s an undeniable jolt of energy and optimism for everyone associated with the game of baseball.

All of those sentiments were particularly true for Opening Day in Portland. The festivities were spectacular and the fans were loud, but for Reid, it all felt a little subdued. He couldn’t decide if it was because of the change in scenery or the change in his role. As Reid stood along the first base line with the other coaches watching the players run onto the field for introductions, he thought back to his own first Opening Day in the majors. It’d only been two years ago, but he felt so much further removed from that momentous day. He certainly felt as though he’d aged more than two years since then. Disappointments and trials always seemed to make gaps in time seem larger than they were. But even all that had happened in the interim couldn’t completely erase his memories of Opening Day and how he’d felt when he ran onto the field for his first April at Citi Field – optimism, pride, and pure joy. He still had those emotions on this day, but they were significantly more muted. He brought his attention back to the Pioneers’ ceremony, and he couldn’t help but smile at the rookies. Their enthusiasm and zeal was readily apparent, even though a few of them were trying to look like calm, seasoned pros. Maybe some of the fans were fooled, but not Reid. He saw the real emotions on their faces, and it helped him forget his pity party and enjoy the rest of Opening Day.

Once the fanfare was over, it was time for the first pitch and the first relevant game of the new season. For the Pioneers, the season began on a high note. Zach Sutter, Portland’s ace, went seven innings, giving up just three runs and striking out ten. The offense drew seven walks and put together a few solid innings. It all culminated in a respectable 7-5 victory over the Boston Red Sox.

Boston took the rest of the series, but Portland bounced back to take two of three from the Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim to close out the opening home stand. This helped rejuvenate the energy of the team and the fans as the Pioneers hit the road for stops in Kansas City, Arlington, and Houston.

Reid had forgotten how rough the first few weeks of a new season were. Even with all the excitement and adrenaline, the adjustment to life on the go was a challenge. Spring training was designed to prepare them for playing every day, but it always felt different when the games mattered. To the casual spectator, it probably looked like just a few hours of work, but any ballplayer could tell you there was much more to it. The games might only be three hours long – give or take – but that was only part of an athlete’s day. Workouts, batting practice, and post-game press often meant at least 10 hours spent at the ballpark. And with more on the line, there was an increased demand on physical and mental energy.

The first few road trips added to the challenge of transitioning to a new season. Between time zone changes, hotels, late flights, and finding time for food, Reid always felt a little off-balance until he got a few trips under his belt. Major league travel was much better than his minor league days of buses and cheap hotels, but it was still grueling and hard on the body. From Reid’s perspective, adjusting to a new season was harder as a player, but he was learning it definitely wasn’t a picnic as a coach either.

As he coped with the schedule and worked with his hitters, Reid had very little time to worry about Kate. He didn’t see much of her either and he was pretty certain that wasn’t a coincidence. He knew there were demands on her time, but after their conversation on the team’s plane, he suspected she was doing everything in her power to avoid him. He finally caught up with her in the lobby of the team’s hotel in Minneapolis. He was just returning from the ballpark, and she looked like she was headed out as she was wearing a short, curve-hugging black dress with bright red heels. He’d seen her dressed up before, obviously, but it still stopped him in his tracks. She’d always been gorgeous, but the years had been kind to her. She looked incredible.

“Wow,” he said. “Hot date?”

“Hopefully,” Kate said. “Blind date. So I don’t really know if he’s hot.”

“Well, he definitely won’t be disappointed when he sees you,” Reid said. “I know I said it already, but – wow. You look really beautiful.”

Her face developed a reddish tint, but Reid was pretty sure it was a blush this time, not anger. It was a more pleasant shade on her.

“Thank you.”

“You’re welcome.”

They looked at each other for a few moments without saying a word. It was a tense silence, but the tension was different. For once, it wasn’t angry. It was more curious and uncertain.

“Well, I should get going,” she said finally.

“Have a good time.”

“You have a good night too.”

It was the first truly civil conversation they’d had since his interview. Reid was impressed and pleased. He was also strangely jealous of the man waiting to meet Kate. He had been planning to stay in and relax, but now he decided he should go out instead. He didn’t want to sit in his room and dwell on the unknown man who was lucky enough to be in Kate’s company for the evening. He didn’t have a right to think or feel anything about the situation, so he needed a distraction to keep his mind busy.

After depositing his bag in his hotel room and re-checking his hair, he headed out to hit up his favorite bar in the Twin Cities. He was looking up the number of a cab company when he saw Derek Beaman sitting alone in the hotel bar staring at an amber-colored beverage. Reid approached him slowly.

“Derek,” he said. “You okay, kid?”

“I don’t know. I don’t know why I ordered this.”

Reid wasn’t sure what was in the glass, but he was certain Derek should not drink it.

“Do you want it?” Reid asked, trying not to sound judgmental.

“I don’t know. I thought I did. Obviously I ordered it. But then the bartender put it in front of me, and now I’m not sure.”

“And why did you order it?”

“I just want to be numb for a little while.”

“Is this about the game? You had a rough night, but it happens to everyone.”

“It’s not that.”

“Then what happened?”

“Keely. She’s dating someone. I saw it on Facebook. Fucking Facebook.”

He knew from past conversations that Keely was Derek’s ex-wife. The ex part only became legal recently too, if Reid recalled correctly.

Reid sighed and sat down. “That sucks. I’m sorry, Derek.”

Derek shook his head and reached toward the drink. He was just tracing the rim of the glass with his finger, but Reid still knew the young man could go a step further at any moment.

“I know I messed up, but she was my everything, Coach B. She was my world, and I threw it all away. I deserved to lose her. I know that. But I’m trying to make it right. Make my life better again. I thought if I proved I wasn’t a waste, she might come back,” Derek said. “But if she’s not coming back, what’s the point of any of this? What’s the point of staying sober? What’s the point of living? I don’t know if I want to live without her.”

Derek’s words cut through him, and Reid went rigid. They sounded familiar, except this time they were spoken instead of just written on college ruled notebook paper. Tony’s lifeless face flashed through Reid’s mind and he sucked in a breath. He couldn’t let Derek go down that road, so he tried to think about what he would have said to Tony if he’d had the opportunity. He’d gone over his words in his head a million times, and now he had a chance to actually have that conversation – even if it was with Derek and not Tony.

“What else is important to you besides Keely?” he asked.

“Nothing. Nothing else matters.”

“There must be something. Or someone. Think about it for a minute.”

Derek sat in silence for several moments and Reid just waited.

“My daughter, I guess,” Derek said finally. “And baseball. And my parents and brother.”

Reid nodded. “That’s a pretty good list. That’s more than a lot of people have.”

Derek’s face scrunched up in thought.

“You should focus on them,” Reid said. “Build a relationship with your daughter, keep working on your career, and stay in touch with your family. They’ll get you through this a lot better than that drink will.”

Derek looked back at the still full glass.

“I promise you the booze will not help,” Reid said. “In fact, that drink could cost you everything you just listed. Are you ready to risk that?”

Derek didn’t say anything. When he pushed the drink aside and stood up, Reid felt the tension leave his body.

“Good job, now let’s go get some food,” Reid said to Derek.

“Sure. I still owe you dinner anyway,” Derek said.

Reid started to argue, but decided against it. Maybe it would make Derek feel better to pick up the bill.

“You’re on,” Reid said, patting Derek’s shoulder.

While they ate, the men exchanged more minor league stories and laughs. There seemed to be an endless supply of both, and by the end of the night, Derek seemed to be feeling better. Reid was feeling pretty good too. Not only had he helped a young player in a time of need, but the evening was good for him too. It was the distraction both men needed to keep from thinking – or drinking – about the women in their respective pasts.

Kate didn’t usually let friends set her up, but in a recent e-mail, Jill mentioned her husband had a high school friend living in Minneapolis, and Kate gave in. Midwest guys were supposed to be nice, and the e-mail came at just the right time. In recent weeks, Kate had decided it might be time to start dating again.

She hadn’t had any kind of relationship in three years. Not since Jonathan. They had met at Winter Meetings and immediately hit it off. He was a ballplayer turned big league scout. He was handsome, charming, and very smart. It broke her self-imposed rule about dating former baseball players, but she hadn’t felt that kind of instant connection with someone in a long time, so she jumped on the chance to explore it.

Their relationship started off hotter than an August day in Texas. After Winter Meetings, she spent several days and nights in his company and his bed, where she was quickly reminded of the perks of sex with an athlete. He’d been out of the game for a few years, but his body was still in prime shape. Much better than most of the bankers, lawyers, and accountants she’d dated in recent years. She lost a lot of sleep in those first few weeks, but she didn’t regret a moment of it. She knew things would change as the season got closer, but Kate figured since he was in the business, Jonathan would understand the demands on her time and energy. And he did, but that didn’t make their relationship any easier. They saw each other monthly and talked via phone and Skype almost daily. But at some point, they realized it wasn’t enough. They both wanted and needed more physical contact, and it was impossible to make that happen without one of them making a career change. Since neither of them was interested in doing that, they called it quits after eight fragmented months.

The split gave Kate increased doubts about her romantic future. If she couldn’t make it work with someone who could relate to her schedule, how could she make it work with anyone else? She gave up trying to find the answer or a relationship.

She wasn’t even completely sure she wanted anything serious now, and she made sure Jill understood she was only looking for dates.

“Dates are a good start. Especially for you,” Jill said. “But don’t be so closed off to something long-term.”

“I’m not ... I just don’t know how anything long-term would work with my schedule,” Kate said.

“You know, someday your work excuse will get old. And so will you.”

“Hey! You’re older than I am.”

“Yes, and I’m married with a 5-year-old and a 2-year-old. What’s your point?”

“My point is that we all have different goals. You’ve always wanted the husband, house, and kids.”

“You used to want that too.”

“Yeah, well, I own a house and I’m in a job I love.”

“That’s great, and I’m proud of you, Kate, but someday those things will seem cold and insignificant. You’ll wish you had a family.”

“I do have a family. A rather large one, if you’ll recall.”

“How can I forget? I went to one Thanksgiving at your house, and I had a headache after just a few hours.”

The girls laughed together as they recalled Jill’s introduction to the Marks’ menagerie. As an only child, Jill had been completely unprepared for the level of noise and chaos in Kate’s house. She was so overwhelmed that she insisted on complete silence as the girls drove back to campus a few days later.

“Really, Kate,” Jill said, bringing them back to the present. “I hope you give Neal a chance. And any other guy you might meet too. You’re more than just a great GM, you’re also a woman. And a pretty fantastic one at that. I think you could make some guy very happy.”