Duality (14 page)

“Someone needs to make her see sense. If she carries on like this she’ll end up losing that baby.”

“Oh good, here are Mummy and Daddy to take over. Aunty Jules is tired,” said Jules, relinquishing the swing to Rachel.

“Aww,” said Leah.

“Let her rest,” said Rachel. “Don’t forget she’s pregnant.”

Leah nodded seriously. “Mum’s right Aunty Jules. Sit down and watch us instead.”

“I will honey,” said Jules, gratefully sinking onto a bench.

Ryan sat beside her and Jules’s lips twitched. “Alright, what have I done?”

“What makes you say that?” he said, watching the children play.

“I can feel your anger. I’ve pissed you off.”

“It’s just a little matter of you beating up three men outside a nightclub last night.”

“Uh-oh. Busted.”

“It was very reckless.”

“What was I supposed to do, sit back and let those primates kick the shit out of me and Sabine?”

“You shouldn’t have been out in the first place.”

“Jesus Ryan, I’m not going to turn into a pumpkin if I’m out after midnight.”

“No but you could lose that baby if you don’t start taking it easier. The first three months are the most delicate.”

“I’m already three months gone and during those three months I was beating up anyone Mikey and Jez told me to and being a bodyguard.”

“Well now you know so there’s no excuse. I know what it would do to you if you did lose that child.”

Jules sighed. “You’re right, I think it would destroy me. You know, part of the reason I came to Devon was to decide whether or not I was going to keep her but I think I already knew the answer the second I found out I was pregnant.”

“Her?”

“It’s a girl and she’s going to be called Cara.”

“I think that’s very nice. You’re great with kids.”

“I am with other people’s when I know I can give them back but what if I turn out like our mum?” she said, looking troubled.

“That will not happen. You are not like her Jules.”

“How can you be so sure?”

“You forget, I grew up with her. You have your dark side but it’s nothing like hers. She couldn’t care less about her grandchildren but look at you, here spending time with them, playing with them. You want to be part of a family. She only saw family as a hindrance. Plus you’ve given up drinking and smoking already. She never did that for any of us.”

“I think Jackson will keep me grounded. He brings out my best side.”

“I hope that’s not the only reason you’re considering marrying him? There has to be love too or it won’t work.”

“Oh I do love him, always have. I was just afraid of hurting him but I’m not the woman I used to be. Now I think we could be great together.”

“I agree.” He hesitated, not sure he should bring it up then decided it was best to get it out in the open. “And what about Mikey?”

She regarded him with surprise. “What about him?”

“I know there’s something between the two of you.”

“There is not, we’re just cousins.”

“Don’t insult my intelligence Jules. I saw him when he thought you were dead, the man was a mess, he could hardly keep it together. When he discovered you were alive he raced off down to Essex alone, leaving the rest of us behind. He’s in love with you.”

“You think so?”

“You don’t sound surprised.”

She shrugged. “I have that effect on men.”

“It’s more than that and you know it. Do you love him? Jules?” he added when she remained silent.

“Yeah, I think so.”

“Oh great. He’s married.”

“I do know that. Don’t wet your pants, I’m not going there. The only man I’m thinking about now is Jax.”

“Glad to hear it. He’s a good one.”

“The best.”

“Right, well, I’m glad we got that sorted out.”

“Aww, you’re being the caring big brother,” she grinned, nudging him with her elbow.

“I know I act aloof and…”

“Stiff?”

“I was going to say icy cool but I suppose that works.”

“Are you actually laughing at yourself?” she said when he smiled.

“You do have a way of making the world seem less serious.”

She leaned back on the bench and waved a hand. “Yeah I’m great, I know.”

“Modest too,” he said wryly.

“But seriously Ryan, thanks for the chat. I appreciate it.”

“Good. So you’re going to take it easier from now on?”

She nodded, grin broadening. “You’re going to regret saying that. I’ll have you waiting on me hand and foot, feeding me grapes and fanning me with a palm frond.”

Someone behind them cleared their throat and they turned to see an elderly man with small round glasses and wispy white hair. “Mr Law, could I have a quiet word with you please, if you’ve got time?”

“Certainly Harold,” said Ryan, getting to his feet.

Jules watched the two men walk to a quiet corner of the park, out of earshot of everyone. After watching them talking seriously for a minute she got up and wandered over to Rachel, who was pushing the boys on the roundabout.

“What’s all that about?” Jules asked her, nodding at Ryan and Harold.

“I have no idea,” replied Rachel, spinning the roundabout harder in response to Ethan’s demands to go faster. Aaron’s eyes filled with tears and he started to cry. When Ethan called him a wuss he only cried harder. He soon stopped when Rachel slowed the roundabout, his grin returning.

“Looks pretty intense,” said Jules, grey eyes narrowing as she studied the two men. “Who is that little gnome anyway?”

“Be nice. Harold is a sweet old bloke. He runs this place, he’s responsible for building most of the models here.”

“There’s a man with too much time on his hands.”

“Don’t let the kids hear you say that, they love it here, even Leah, no matter what she says.”

“I wonder what he wants with Ryan?”

“Why so curious?”

She shrugged. “I don’t really know. I’m just a nosy bitch I suppose.”

“Nosy bitch,” piped up Ethan.

“Oh crap, sorry Rach.”

“Crap,” yelled Aaron with a toothy grin.

“Boys, those are naughty words. Don’t say them again please,” chided Rachel.

“Sorry,” said Jules, cringing. “See, what sort of mum am I going to make?”

“Don’t beat yourself up about it. Every parent accidentally swears in front of their kids. Just as long as you make it clear it’s naughty they should be okay. Being a parent is one long stretch of guilt, believe me. It’s when you don’t feel any guilt that you need to worry.”

Jules thought of Estelle and nodded. “You’re right.”

“Aunty Jules said a naughty word,” chimed Ethan.

“Yes I did and don’t you say it again honey, your dad won’t be happy.”

“Sorry,” he said, making Jules smile.

“They’re so cute,” she said. “They must get it from you. Jez said Ryan was born looking thirty years old.”

“A mighty fine thirty,” said Rachel with a satisfied smile. “Looks like Harold’s finished with him.”

Jules turned to see Ryan striding back over to them, a troubled look on his face. “And it doesn’t look like they were discussing the weather either,” she said. “What was that about?” she asked him when he returned.

“Nothing.”

“Didn’t look like nothing.”

“It was personal.”

“Got yourself a bit on the side? When did you turn into a hobbit fetishist?”

“Don’t you ever stop?” he sighed.

“It’s part of my charm,” she smiled. “So, what did he want?”

“Just to chat.”

“About what?”

“Nothing in particular.”

“Give over, that was a heavy talk you two had.”

“It was nothing, now will you please let it go?” He looked to Rachel. “Are you ready to eat? The children will be getting hungry.”

Jules watched them suspiciously as they rounded up the children and made for the café.

“Does Harold have a problem?” said Rachel under her breath as they walked away, conscious of Jules watching them.

“Yep and he wants our help.” Ryan and Rachel had overcome any unpopularity the revelation about their criminal pasts had caused by sorting out any problems the locals had that couldn’t be dealt with legally. They were reluctant to use the word vigilantes but that was exactly what they were.

“Are we going to give it?” said Rachel.

“I think we should but we’ll discuss it later.”

“Quite right. Jules is already suspicious of your conversation with Harold.”

They looked over their shoulders to see her still watching them, her grey eyes filled with knowing.

“Then we must be careful,” said Ryan. “I don’t want her finding out about any of this, she’ll only want to get involved.”

“Agreed but I get the feeling we won’t be able to keep it from her.”

CHAPTER 14

Estelle staggered along the dock in her high heels, tempted to fall to her knees and kiss the ground. Finally she was back in Blighty. It had taken her a while to make her way back from Brindisi in Italy. Most of it had involved giving blow jobs to truckers and sailors, hitching her way across Europe with sexual favours. A lot of them had been lonely and easy prey for someone as wily as her. Some of them had been so alone and homesick they hadn’t even wanted sex, they’d just wanted companionship and to talk to a fellow Brit, so she’d listened to their pathetic stories of home and nicked from them when they were busy babbling on. The last one had been the worst who’d brought her from Calais to Hull. He was a fisherman who never showered and stank of fish and sweat. Just thinking about the many blowjobs she’d had to give him to get her across the channel made her stomach roll over and she dropped to her knees and heaved, considering actually drinking saltwater to wash away the revolting taste of him but fortunately she knew better. The rage that had kept her going through the arduous journey home returned, aimed entirely at her eldest son. Ryan had been the one to stick her on that slow boat to nowhere and he was going to fucking pay for it.

“Changed your mind about leaving?” called the stinky fisherman when he saw her on her knees on the dock.

“Go fuck yourself,” she called back.

“I’ll have to now you’re going,” he said, laughter in his voice.

She threw the ugly bastard a glare before getting to her feet and wiping her mouth on the back of her sleeve. Oh yes, Ryan was going to pay big style for this.

Isaac Jones was holed up in the converted detached house in Kent that acted as his headquarters. It was the safest place in the world - every window blocked out with reinforced steel. The only door in was similarly secured with two of his men on permanent guard duty armed with shotguns. There was also a secret escape route through the basement that only he and Marcus - his younger brother and second-in-command - knew about. Security hadn’t always been so stringent but he was taking no chances. Jared Slattery, who he had been fighting for control of the county for a few years now, had gone into hiding after the kicking his family had taken from the Maguires and Laws. Now Slattery was like a wounded bear and at his most dangerous. Isaac was furious with himself for not striking when he was still weak and easy to find but Isaac had some in-house trouble - turned out one of his men was a Slattery spy and he hadn’t been able to trust any of the others not to let on to the Slatterys when he was about to attack. By the time he’d cleaned up his house Jared and his mad mother had gone into hiding and he had no idea where they were. It was a bloody shame too because Jules Maguire had given him the plan of the Slattery compound after she’d been held captive there. That information had been dynamite and he’d been forced to waste it because of one treacherous bastard who was now buried deep in a field in the middle of nowhere and thanks to that double-crossing fucker his quest to be top dog in Kent was rapidly failing. They’d searched everywhere they could think of for the Slatterys and nothing. It was like they’d dropped off the face of the earth. On top of that Mikey Maguire was rapidly losing patience with him and he couldn’t fight a war on two fronts. He’d promised Mikey he’d have wiped Jared out by now and he was no closer than he had been three months ago. If only he’d been instrumental in freeing Jules from Jared then Mikey would owe him but Jules had done that herself and all he’d done was drive Mikey to a pub to pick her up. So that didn’t exactly give him leverage. If he took over Kent with the support of the Maguires he’d be fucking set and anyone else would be reluctant to take him on. His future would be made, if only he could find Jared fucking Slattery. He had eyes all over the county but unfortunately he suspected Jared was hiding out in the sticks, an area he was familiar with but which Isaac wasn’t. He’d sent some of his men out looking but so far they’d found sod all. Not surprising, stumbling about in cow shit and grass in designer shoes and ties. They’d been doomed to failure from the start. But he wasn’t out yet. The Slatterys still needed to get supplies and that was how he was going to hunt them down.

“Boss,” called one of his men. “Marcus is back.”

Isaac leapt up and ran into what had been the front room of the house but was now just a room stripped back to the bare wood, steel plates covering the window. His brother was just entering by the back door, shaking rain off his coat. Marcus was just as big as Isaac but his face was still smooth and handsome, however he hadn’t been cut up by a loon with a knife when he was sixteen like Isaac had.

“Pissing it down out there,” grumbled Marcus.

“I don’t want a fucking weather report,” said Isaac. “Have you found Slattery?”

“One of the local farmers - after a hefty bribe - told me some city types were buying veg and eggs and stuff off him. Said they stuck out because they don’t fit in. From the description he gave they sound like Slattery heavies. He never knows much in advance when they’re coming, they’ll just ring up and say they’ll be down soon and give him a shopping list.”

“Slattery’s playing it smart, for once.”

“I think the smartness comes from Tanya, she was always more cautious. So I’ve given him my number, he’ll call when they call. But we need to move closer, it’ll take us over an hour to get there from here. I’ve sorted us our own farmhouse not far away.”

“Nice work,” grinned Isaac, shaking his hand. “Soon Slattery will be dead.”

“And w
e’ll
be the kings around here.”

Isaac didn’t say it but he thought it would be a relief to keep his word. Mikey Maguire was not someone he wanted to piss off.

Amber stomped around the house, feeling miserable. Mikey had sodded off up to Glasgow to do God only knew what. No doubt someone was going to end up dead. Despite the great sex they’d had he’d still seemed distracted when he’d left and Amber knew why - he was thinking about Jules, the slag. She’d been paranoid that Mikey had actually gone to join her in Devon but Cathy had assured her he was in Glasgow with Jez, which had made her feel a little better. She wasn’t sure whether she missed him or not because it was a relief not to have to watch his every move, wondering if he was thinking about another woman but she didn’t like being in the house on her own, it felt so big and empty. Josh was with her but he was no substitute for another adult.

A knock at the door had her racing to answer it, eager for some company. She wasn’t expecting to see Declan on her doorstep.

“What do you want?” she said.

“Mikey asked me to keep an eye out while he’s gone.”

“You mean he wants you to spy on me?” she scowled.

Declan was puzzled by the hostility radiating off her. “No, not at all. He just knows you don’t like being in the house on your own. He wanted me to make sure you were okay,” he replied, puzzled as to why she looked so angry.

She threw the door open wider. “Come in then, have a poke around.”

“That’s really not necessary.”

“No, I insist. Then you can report back to him that I’m not hiding any au pairs or men.”

Declan’s eyes widened. “That’s not it at all. Mikey doesn’t think you’d do that.”

“You don’t know him like I do, he’s so controlling I can’t breathe,” she said, seeing her chance for a little payback. This was what he got for tarting around with leather-wearing psychos. She sighed and shook her head. “You have no idea what it’s like.”

“Tell me then.”

She smiled into his kind face, which was actually very handsome, he was a Maguire after all. “You want to come in for a coffee?”

“Alright,” he said, stepping inside.

They walked through to the kitchen, Declan admiring her pert little backside as she walked. He’d always thought she was a stunner and that Mikey was bloody lucky.

“Have you heard how Mikey is?” she said.

“Hasn’t he called you?”

“He did to tell me he’d arrived safely and what I could and couldn’t do,” she added miserably. That wasn’t such an exaggeration, he had told her not to bring any more au pairs into the house.

“I didn’t know Mikey could be like that,” he said as she switched on the kettle.

“You never can tell what goes on behind closed doors,” she sighed, preparing the mugs.

“He always seems so laid back.”

“He probably is with you lot but in here he rules with a rod of iron.”

“You sure?” he frowned.

Amber, her back turned to him, rolled her eyes. “Oh yes,” she said, voice full of self pity. “I can’t do anything and it’s really getting to me.” She turned back to face him with her best puppy dog look, eyes full of with tears. “And I don’t know what to do.”

He leapt up and rushed to her. “Come here,” he said, hugging her.

Amber clung onto him, burying her face in his shoulder as she cried her crocodile tears, unable to believe it was so easy to fool people. But then again she’d always known Declan wasn’t like the others, he was weaker, more sensitive, that was why Mikey and Jez had left Grant with him while they went to Glasgow, not trusting Declan to be able to run things alone in their absence.

“I’ll finish the brews,” he said in his gentle Irish accent. “You sit down and tell me everything.”

Amber was surprised how easily the tears came. It just went to show how Mikey’s fling with his own cousin had affected her and it was a relief to get it all out. Of course everything she told him was complete exaggeration, she made Mikey out to be some sort of monster but it was a pleasing revenge. Plus it was nice having someone sit there and listen to her.

By the time she was through Declan was staring at her in horror and she was feeling so much better.

“Jaysus,” was all he said. “But he’s never hit you?”

Amber knew she couldn’t push it that far. “No, never. It’s more verbal and mental abuse, not letting me go out with my friends, wanting me to be at home all the time with Josh. He hates me being around anyone else, that’s why he won’t let me have an au pair, he’s just so jealous.”

“But he got you a job.”

“A job with a friend of his who will keep an eye on me and it’s not exactly full time work.”

“I can’t believe this of Mikey,” he said, shaking his head. “He’s a good guy.”

“Are you serious? He didn’t get where he is today by doing good deeds.”

“Yeah I know but he’s got a code of honour, like Frank had.”

“That’s what he wants everyone to think but in private…” She shuddered. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have told you. You should go,” she said, sweeping his coffee mug away and hurrying over to the sink with it.

He got up to follow. “Yes you should. This is wrong.”

She whipped round to face him. “He’d kill us both if he found out we’ve been talking like this.”

“He won’t find out. I’m not going to tell him. Are you?”

She shook her head. “No way.”

“So this is why he asked me to keep an eye on you?”

Amber spotted another chance to get at Mikey. “Yeah and he picked you to do it because he thinks you’re weak and gullible and wouldn’t pick up on anything.”

Declan’s eyes flashed with anger, to her satisfaction. He knew he was the weak link in the chain, the one who needed watching, who hadn’t taken to the violence as easily as the others. Even that kid Shane had more of a say in things than he did. Being a Maguire naturally Declan had thought he would be groomed to take over as Mikey and Jez’s successor when they eventually retired, although that wouldn’t be for ages yet but he knew they’d switched to Shane for that. He’d tried to tell himself that it didn’t matter, that Mikey wouldn’t retire for years so he had plenty of time to show him what he could do but it still hurt. Truth be told, it was making him bitter but he’d always felt so guilty because Mikey had given him so much, he’d brought him in on the family business, trained him up, trusted him, so he’d pushed the negative feelings aside. Now Mikey’s own wife was telling him what a creep he was, giving him licence to finally acknowledge those feelings.

“I’m not weak,” he hissed.

“I know that, I’ve always known it,” she said softly. “It’s such a shame Mikey can’t see your potential.”

He held her gaze, his breath taken away by her beauty. She was like an ethereal pixie, so dainty and delicate. He wanted to touch her but she was married to Mikey so he didn’t dare. Instead he took a step back, clearing his throat.

“I’ve got to go, I’ve got an…appointment,” he said, thinking quickly. “But I want you to call me if you ever need me.”

She nodded, accepting the card he held out to her, face wet with tears. “Thank you, you’ve been so kind. It’s good to know I have a real friend.”

He gave her hand a gentle squeeze. “You’re not alone.”

“That is so reassuring,” she said, wiping away her tears.

“Right, I’ll be off then,” he said before walking out.

When he’d gone Amber cracked into a smile.
What a sucker
, she thought. Still, it was good to know she had someone in her corner.

Ryan had taken the children home while Rachel took Jules shopping for maternity clothes as she found her jeans were already getting tight. Jules had trailed around after her miserably, she hated shopping at the best of times but having to buy clothes twice her normal size was just painful for her.