Echoes of the Heart (32 page)

Dr. Hathaway
motioned to Cash.
 
“Cash, let’s step
outside a minute.”

           
Cash’s
gut burned but he showed no emotion.
 
Once on the front porch the two men faced each other.
 
“She has lost the baby, Cash.”

           
Without
warning, he spun around.
 
His fist collided
with the wall splintering the wood and shaving the skin from his knuckles.
 
The doctor sounded hopeful.
 
“She can have more children but perhaps you
should consider marriage first.”
 
His
face tensed when he continued.
 
“Frankly,
Cash I never thought you the type to take advantage of an innocent young girl.”

           
Cash
held his emotions in check.
 
“Doc, I
didn’t know about the baby until today.
 
I’ve asked about getting married.
 
She didn’t want it.
 
Believe me,
that’s going to change.”

           
They
walked back inside and Doctor Hathaway spoke to Diane.
 
“She needs a gown and a sponge bath.
 
Will you do it while I make a few house
calls?
 
I have given her laudanum for
pain.
 
It shouldn’t cause much
discomfort.”

           
Mike
and Diane left to retrieve the clothing while Cash knelt on one knee beside
Raeden’s bed.
 
Her arm was splinted and
wrapped.
 
He was glad to see the intense
look of pain had gone, but she looked so small and vulnerable lying at
rest.
 
He lifted her free hand to his
lips, brushing the tips of her fingers, watching her sleep.

           
When
Diane returned, he assisted her while she carefully bathed Raeden.
 
Most of her body looked beaten and
bruised.
 
Diane ran a damp cloth through
her hair and Cash helped with the nightgown.
 
They both pulled up a chair and sat next to the bed watching her sleep.

           
Cash
turned to Diane.
 
“Did you know about the
child?”
 
His voice held a note of
disdain.

           
“Yes.
 
I told her she should tell you.
 
She made me promise to keep her secret.
 
I would have told you myself.
 
I’m sorry, Cash.”
 
She received no response.
 

He considered her
statement.
 
Why would Raeden not tell him
something so important?
 
After all, any
blame rested with him.
 
Plagued with remorse
at having taken her innocence and the realization she might fear his reprisal, made
him feel the misplaced leviathan of the past few years rather than the man
Raeden deserved.
 
If it took the rest of
his days, he would make this up to her.
 
The sound of Diane’s voice brought him back to the present.

“Do you have any
idea who did this?”

           
“Not
exactly. I have my suspicions and they are going to pay.”
 
His brows drew together while his lips spread
thin and his jaw twitched.

           
“I
hope you kill them.
 
If I ever see them,
I will destroy them myself.”

 
          
His
teeth clenched.
 
“The thought has definitely
crossed my mind.”

           
A
blanket of darkness covered the sky.
 
A
scant silver circle haloed the November moon and the zenith was sprinkled with
flickering stars.
 
Diane looked at Cash,
her face drawn.
 
“I’m exhausted.
 
I’ll go to the store for a few hours rest
then come to relieve you.”

           
His
tone held sharpness.
 
“I’m not going
anywhere.
 
You go ahead.”

           
“Promise
you will fetch me if there’s any change for the worse.”

           
“If
that happens, I’ll send someone.”
 
He did
not intend to leave her.

***

Except for
necessity, Cash remained by her side watching the rise and fall of her
chest.
 
Just before daybreak she woke
screaming and he knelt by her side stroking her hair.
 
“It’s just a dream, sweetheart.
 
You’re safe now.”

           
Awakened
by screams, the doctor entered, sat down and uncovered Raeden, pressed along
the line below her rib cage.
 
“Rae, there
doesn’t appear to be any internal bleeding.
 
You will be fine in a few weeks time.
 
I’ll give you something for the pain.”
 
After administering a dose in a small amount of water, he refilled the
glass then passed it to Cash.
 
“She needs
to drink this.”
           
After he left, Raeden raised
her hand to brush the stubble on his face.
 
“You look so tired, Cash.
 
Are you
okay?”

           
His
heart ached, tearing at his resolve.
 
She
lay in agony after a brutal attack, worried about him!
 
He coaxed the water past her cracked swollen
lips.
 
“I’m fine, don’t worry about
me.
 
You just rest; I’m right here if you
need me.”

           
Gigantic
liquid beads fell from her eyes as she spoke.
 
“Cash, I’m so sorry I lost our baby.”

           
He
almost broke down but sucked in his emotions.
 
“Rae, please stop, I can’t stand it.
 
This is not your fault.”
 
He
pulled her hand to his lips, unable to touch anywhere else on her battered body
without inflicting more discomfort.

           
When
her eyes closed, and she breathed slow and steady he lowered his face to feel
her breath against his lips.
 
With no one
watching, he wept.

Thirty-eight

           
For
two days, Cash kept up the vigil, nodding off occasionally in the chair by her
bed.
 
She ate very little and woke up in
hysterics from nightmares.
 
Each time the
hate grew stronger, eroding sanity, corrupting his thoughts while he gently
dabbed the sweat from her brow and soothed her back to sleep.

           
Raeden
bolted up screaming, chilled from cold sweats.
 
Cash knelt at her side.
 
“Rae,
it’s a bad dream.
 
You will hurt yourself
if you don’t quiet down.”
 
Every time
this happened, his blood boiled with fury contaminating his judgment making him
eager to lash out.

           
She
choked back tears, looking into his eyes, pleading, “Cash, please take me
home.”

           
“Doc
says you can go back in a couple more days.”

           
Her
voice quivered when she spoke.
 
“No, I
mean home to St. Louis.
 
I can’t stay in this godforsaken barbaric
country one day longer.”

           
His
eyes opened wide, brows raised in surprise.
 
Not desiring to upset her, he spoke softly and agreed.
 
“I understand how you must feel but it’s too
early for such a trip.
 
As soon as you
are well enough, I’ll take you home.”

           
Raeden’s
rapid breathing slowed.
 
“At least take
me to Diane’s, I don’t like waking in a strange place.”

           
His
eyes glanced upward as he tried to think.
 
“I’ll talk to Doc Hathaway.
 
If it
is okay with him—”

           
“No,
it’s my decision.
 
I stood the ride all
the way here, and I can go a few miles to Diane’s.”

           
He
knew when he had lost.
 
“Fine.
 
Do you mind if I take a bath and shave
first?”

She attempted a
feeble smile.
 
“I had been going to
mention that.”

           
In
spite of recent events, he chuckled on his way out.
 
The fluctuation in her mood lifted his
spirits.
 
For the first time since her
abduction, he began to relax.

Overcome by
fatigue, the hot bath nearly put him to sleep.
 
He splashed cold water over his face after shaving.
 
Temporarily revived, he dressed in clean
clothing and promptly returned to Raeden’s side.

He was relieved to
find Diane with Raeden, she had not been alone.
 
He noticed the swelling had receded on her face since the first day but
the bruising had turned darker.
 
Aside
from the discoloration, she seemed almost normal propped up on pillows talking
with Diane.

           
“Diane
offered to drive.
 
Will you still come
along?
 
I’m frightened. They are still
out there somewhere.”

           
They won’t be for long.
 
“I wouldn’t allow you to leave without
me.
 
Doc says you need to take something
for pain.”

           
“No,
I don’t want anything.
 
It makes the
dreams worse.
 
I will suffer the pain
rather than the torment.”

           
Wrapped
in blankets she made the trip cradled in Cash’s arms, nestling close while he
cushioned her ride.
 
He carried her into
the bedroom and she drank in the familiar surroundings feeling better already
then asked for a hot bath and privacy.

           
Biting
back pain, she struggled into the tub, splinted arm dangling over the side and
scrubbed so abrasively her body burned.
 
She would have peeled the skin off if she thought it would rid her of
the memory of how they used her.
 
With
great effort, she managed to shampoo her hair.

           
Stepping
out, her aching body felt soothed from the hot water.
 
She dried off as best she could and draped a
towel around her hair.
 
She left one arm
of the robe draped over her shoulder an held it close around her then heard a
soft knock and Diane’s voice at the door.

           
“Rae,
are you all right?”

           
“Come
in, I’m fine.”
 
She still felt
dirty.
 
Nothing could ever rid her of the
illusory crawling crud.

Diane dried her
hair, assisted with a gown and satin bed jacket then tucked her in bed.
 
“Would you please hand me my sketch
book?”
 
When she completed the drawings,
a second knock sounded, Cash entered to kneel beside the bed and gave her a
kiss on the forehead.

“You’re fine here,
I need to go into town and take care of some business.
 
I will return later.”

           
Raeden
handed him the sketches of the men she had just completed.
 
It had not been an easy task.
 
She felt nauseous but knew it would be
necessary to describe them eventually.

***

Cash didn’t want
to leave her but desired to revive as much of her reputation as possible under
the circumstances.
 
A light snow fell on
his return drive.
 
Thoughts remained on
vengeance, steeling his resolve, knowing every waking moment, he would spend
visualizing ways to make them suffer.

Upon arrival, John
leapt to his feet, face contorted with worry.
 
“How is Rae?”

“She’s much
better.
 
I need you to send out some
telegrams with the descriptions of those men.
 
Raeden drew some sketches and mentioned she heard one called
Horace.
 
Hopefully we can get a lead
before the weather worsens.”

John walked to the
telegraphy while Cash went to visit the preacher to arrange for a ceremony as
soon as possible.
 
When he appeared
elated with the news, Cash assumed he had heard the gossip then related he
could make it the following afternoon.
 

           
He
sauntered to the store where Mike showed him the selection of gold bands and he
picked the best available then ordered a set he knew would please Raeden from a
catalogue.
 
Mike offered to send a wire
so the rings would arrive on the next train.

           
After
eating an early dinner, he spoke to Caroline asking if she would contact
Raeden’s friends about the wedding, hoping they could make the day a special
event.

           
She
clapped her hands together.
 
“Cash, this
is so exciting, I have been expecting this for weeks.
 
We will all show up tomorrow.”
 
Christ, had every one in town expected them
to be married?