Eleanor (89 page)

“No dying, got it,” he murmured.

“Eleanor, the plan? Now, please, you’ve been out for a while and time is slipping by,” Conlan said, sounding rather exasperated. She turned and held his gaze, which garnered another one of his unfathomable looks. She nodded, reached for the diamond and wrapped her hand around it, feeling the comforting vibrations of the energy stored within. Eyes closed, she pushed a string into its lattice and pulled the energy free.
 

It was like releasing the cork off a champagne bottle after spending ten minutes shaking it up. The energy exploded through her – too much, too fast to control. Panicking, she made futile attempts to remove the string. Her levels passed normal and began climbing, her body shook and the surging power began to get painful. She had to release it, had to get rid of it, but they could not afford to waste the energy. She opened her eyes to find Conlan’s concerned face in front of hers.
Mustn’t release the energy.
Not really thinking about what she was doing, she acted on instinct and grabbed Conlan’s wrist. The moment their skin touched, the excess energy flowed from her into him, like a burst dam, their energies linking effortlessly. He gasped, pain creasing his features and body slumping forwards. Eleanor kept a tight grip on his wrist and struggled to regain control. Eventually the flow slowed enough to make control possible. Eleanor withdrew her energy string from the diamond and took short, panting breaths.
 

Raising his head, Conlan swore softly in Dwarfish, his body shaking as he looked at her bewildered. She smiled and reached a hand to stroke his head as she let go of his wrist. Slowly sitting up he rubbed it and looked down in surprise. There was a raised imprint, like the rest of them carried, but the symbol burnt into the inside of his wrist was a five-pointed star within a circle. Closing her eyes for a moment to catch her breath, Eleanor found she could almost see her energy glowing within him. Luminous green and brown flowing streams wrapped around his own glowing white energy. Conlan was holding a lot of energy, but he seemed to be showing no ill effects.

“What was that?” he asked, still rubbing his wrist.

“I think that was the connection. You don’t take energy, Conlan,
we
are not yours to control;
you
belong to
us
. We give you energy. You currently hold so much that I can see it glowing, I can feel it. Please try not to release it at us. Can you feel it?” Eleanor asked slowly and gently, not wanting to scare him into accidentally exploding them.
 

Conlan closed his eyes, and a grin, like a child opening a much longed for birthday present, spread across his bruised face. “It feels warm and sort of earthy.”
 

Eleanor smiled. “OK, hold that thought, keep your eyes closed and just concentrate on what it feels like. I’m going to help the others and then we’ll see if you can use it, OK?”
 

Working as quickly as possible, Eleanor carefully rationed out what was left of the energy in the diamond. The change in her friends was instantaneous; colour returned to their faces and their movements became more fluid and stronger. Freddie claimed his pain had reduced and Amelia was not the only one with hope in her eyes. Conlan had not moved from where Eleanor had left him kneeling on the floor, his eyes closed and a small, dreamy smile on his face. Not wanting to startle him, she kept her voice low as she spoke.
 

“Conlan, keep your eyes closed for the moment, OK? Tell me about the energy.”

Conlan nodded. “I can feel it inside me. It’s part of my own energy, but separate. It feels like you, like your personality is stamped on it.”

“OK, Will is going to send you some of his energy,” Eleanor said, looking at Will. The only visible evidence of this transfer was Conlan’s widening smile.

“Wow,” he breathed.

“You can feel that, too?” Eleanor asked.

“It’s so different from yours – wet, cold... calming,” Conlan whispered.

“That would definitely be Will. Can you differentiate between the different types of energy?” Eleanor asked as she watched his face for signs of pain that would indicate he was holding too much.

“Yes, as easily as I can tell the difference when I look at the two of you, the colours are obvious,” he said.

“Colours?” Freddie asked.

Conlan smiled, eyes still firmly closed. “Like the colours when you release your energy at Amelia’s shield. Eleanor’s energy is green and brown, Will’s is purple and blue. It’s beautiful.”

“OK, next step. Freddie is going to send you some of his energy,” Eleanor said, nodding at Freddie, who grinned at her in turn.

“Hot,” Conlan muttered, then he chuckled. “Impatient; definitely Freddie, red and orange.”

“My turn,” Amelia said quietly.

“Oh, Amelia… so beautiful,” Conlan murmured. “Your colour is silver-grey. Your energy feels so light, but it’s so strong.”

Amelia looked surprised at Conlan’s comment. “Sure you’re reading that right?”

Conlan nodded. “Strong, so very strong, as strong as Eleanor’s.”

Will smiled and hugged Amelia to him. Amelia smiled faintly, looking a little stunned.

“Conlan, can you feel your hold on our energy?” Eleanor asked.

Conlan shook his head. “No, I’m not holding it, it’s just there.”

He’s not holding the energy back; maybe that’s just us. Perhaps we have to hold our energy in and he has to push the energy out.
Still speaking in a slow, calm and quiet voice, Eleanor made another request of him. “When you feel ready, Conlan, I want you to open your eyes.
Please
try not to release the energy you’re holding, as the damage you could cause would be quite spectacular. You have enough of our energy to level this building.”

“You’re not exactly filling me with confidence, Eleanor.”

“Sorry, but you need to be aware of the potential you’re carrying.”

Slowly, looking like he expected something horrific to happen at any second, Conlan opened his eyes. Eleanor and Amelia gasped.
 

“What?” he asked, his gaze travelling over them anxiously.

“Your eyes are glowing,” Will said, when he realised Eleanor was too awestruck to respond.

“They are? Is that normal?”
 

Will shrugged and they all turned to look at Eleanor. She stared at the bright-green orbs. They had always glowed with his life, his intelligence, but this was something completely different. It was like they were backlit. They were so brilliant emerald green that she felt she could sit and stare into them forever.
I wonder if he can see in the dark now,
she pondered, the thought coming out of nowhere. With effort she snapped herself out of her mind’s desire to lose itself in Conlan’s stunning eyes.

“I have no idea if it’s normal and frankly no time to think about it now. So long as you’re not in pain, I’m going to class all of this as a success and move on,” Eleanor said briskly.

“I’m not in pain, it just feels a little strange. It’s like whispered voices you can’t quite hear,” Conlan said, smiling.

“That would be destiny talking, sweetie,” Amelia said quietly, running a gentle hand over Conlan’s head. Eleanor smiled. Destiny was not just talking, destiny was yelling.

“You have energy and you’re connected to us; the brand on your wrist proves that. Now you need to release some of our energy in a meaningful fashion,” Eleanor said, consolidating her thoughts on the matter as she spoke. “This is where I come a little unstuck, as I have no idea how to test this. As I said, if you let go of all the energy we gave you, you’re going to bring this building down on our heads. I was sort of hoping that your control would be different from ours, because if it isn’t there seems little point in having a ‘centre’. I was hoping that you would be able to release our energy in well-aimed, controlled bursts, basically the opposite of what happens when we release ours.”
 

“Your energy releases always seemed very controlled to me,” Conlan said. “You blasted that chair right out from under Merl. What happened to Merl, by the way?”

“He’s dead,” Eleanor said flatly.

“I did him a great wrong…” Conlan stopped, frowning, as if what he was saying did not make sense to him.

“It wasn’t your fault,” Eleanor whispered again. Conlan looked at her, his eyes glazing over again as memories ran through his head.

“Oh,” he murmured as tears once again filled his eyes.

Conlan crumpled. His body trembled violently. Eleanor pulled him into her arms. She expected him to push her away, but he wrapped his arms around her, buried his face in her neck and sobbed. Not being able to feel his relief as Eleanor could, not understanding, just wanting to help, Amelia reached for his hand. On his other side Freddie put a hand on Eleanor’s shoulder as a sign of quiet support. Will reached an arm around Amelia.
 

For one brief moment they were all physically connected, and with the speed of a star exploding, their consciousness was thrown to all corners of the globe, as if they had been pushed into space on the top of a rocket and they were now looking back down at the planet they had left. Mydren spread out in all its natural glory before them. Eleanor could feel the control all the elements exerted on their environment, could see how easy it would be to manipulate. The experience was similar to when the four of them had balanced their energies together, but on a much larger scale. She could feel the wonder of the others and could feel Conlan’s palpable awe.
 

What is this?
Conlan’s question echoed through their heads. Eleanor felt them all try to answer it at once, but it sounded as nothing more than white noise. When there appeared to be no response, Conlan panicked. Was he here alone? How did he get back to his body? As his concentration wavered they began to fall, plummeting back towards Mydren at a stomach churning speed. Conlan was clearly in control, even if this was not evident to him. Their returning consciousness hit hard enough to affect their physical bodies and wrenched them apart.
 

Still reeling from their ‘crash landing’, Eleanor was unprepared when she was dumped out of the connection and back into the raging chaos of Conlan’s tormented mind. It was like being stuck on a merry-go-round that just got faster and faster, images flashing past, confusing, scary. If she did not concentrate she would lose herself. She could feel the others trapped as she was, but with even less idea of what was going on. A calm refuge was needed so they could marshal their resources and detach themselves. An image jumped out at her from the maelstrom and stopped all thought. As she focused on it she moved into a memory. It was her, or at least it was someone the same size as her, because all similarity between herself and the creature in Conlan’s memory ended there. The figure stood, soaking wet, looking into the distance with an apprehensive look on her face.
Before we found the chalice
, Eleanor remembered.
We were swimming. I was thinking about the dragon.
Conlan was thinking about something else entirely, and Eleanor knew that if she could have blushed she would have done. He was absorbed by her casual grace, the way her wet clothes showed her curves, her beautiful face, hair falling artfully across it in wet streams. In his eyes she glowed with an inner light that he felt drawn to, like an addiction, a voracious desire he simply added ever more fuel to, but never satisfied. His need for her was almost painful. Eleanor asked the question without thinking,
How do you really feel about me, Conlan?
realising too late that the others had joined her in this corner of Conlan’s mind.

Image after image snapped before them, his thoughts, feelings, desires and fantasies coming with them. Eleanor stood in the white dress, looking so small and vulnerable but so unbelievably beautiful. His memory of her righteous rage as she had moved with determined power and control, fighting Duncan and his friends, shone in glorious splendour. Her eyes glistened as they held his, soft, chocolate-brown, flecks of amber moving through them depending on her mood. When she was angry with him they looked almost gold, and when she allowed her love for him to show through they were a deep, rich-brown he wanted to disappear into forever. Hundreds of images. Recurring feelings of pride, gratitude, adoration, wonder, amusement and devotion. She felt his overwhelming desire to protect her, but over and above all of it Eleanor felt his love. A huge feeling. She filled his every waking moment and he felt her absence as a physical ache. His love was different. She had felt Freddie’s love for her and Will’s love for Amelia, but this was something beyond that. While all the Avatars loved dearly and with all their hearts, they held some of themselves back. Eleanor knew what Will held back from Amelia, frightened she would run from the dark side of his soul. She did not know what Freddie held back, but she could guess. Conlan did not love like that, though. He would hold nothing back if he ever admitted he loved her. For Conlan it was all or nothing. He did not know how to limit what he showed. With a shock, Eleanor realised that she had known he loved her, her heart had known. Her physical being had recognised his love in the way he touched her and cared for her, and she had unknowingly responded to it. This was why her love for him had never faltered, because her heart had overridden her logical mind.

Thinking of her calmed Conlan’s mind. She reached out to Will. Too embarrassed to discuss what she knew they had all just seen, she skipped straight to business.

How do we get free?

I don’t know
, Will answered, sounding incredibly tired.
Maybe Conlan has to expel us?
 

Eleanor felt Amelia’s presence come closer.

Maybe if we all speak together?
she suggested.

Eleanor felt joint agreement as Freddie found them.

OK
, she agreed.
What do we say?

If we just have to get his attention, we could just yell his name
,
Freddie offered.

Right,
said Will.
After three: one, two, three.