Elizabeth's Daughter (16 page)

*     *

The dreaded day of Amy’s surgery came. Elizabeth and Gail took her to the hospital, where Elizabeth was extremely relieved to see Mrs. Vargas waiting. She had unflinching faith in Mrs. Vargas’ ability to make everything right.

  “Hi Elizabeth, Gail, little Amy,” Mrs. Vargas said cheerily as she came up to them. “I’ve filled out all the paperwork. So all that’s left is just... doing what has to be done.”

  The three of them sat in the waiting room for the first hour saying very little. Elizabeth was in no mood to tell Mrs. Vargas about the wedding. She could only focus on her little Amy. After one of the nurses came out and reported that all was going well, Mrs. Vargas left with the instruction to call her for any reason.

  When a couple hours later Amy was being wheeled into her room, Elizabeth couldn’t believe it was over. She had almost no memory of what had happened since she walked into the hospital. She felt as though she’d been swimming in murky water, with sounds and forms coming towards then moving away from her.

  But now all her senses popped on as if a switch had been thrown.

  “How is she?” Elizabeth asked.

  “Perfect,” the doctor said. “Very routine, very textbook perfect.”

  “Oh! Thank you!” Elizabeth exclaimed. She turned to Gail and Mrs. Vargas who had returned. “She’s all right.”

  They both nodded, grinning.

  “Did I tell you I’m getting married Saturday?” Elizabeth asked Mrs. Vargas.

  “Gail mentioned it.”

  “I’m sorry I didn’t say anything about it. My mind was on Amy.” Elizabeth imagined she looked as guilty as she felt.

  “Mrs. Vargas smiled. “That’s okay. I understand.”

  “So, what did Gail tell you?”

  “That the very attractive man you work with, Tony
–
remember I met him briefly?
–
asked you to marry him.”

  “That’s right, you did meet him. I’m afraid he didn’t make a very good impression.”

  “As I recall, he hand’t been told about Amy.”

  “That’s true,” Elizabeth nodded. “I suppose this is a bit premature, but I’d like to put a little bug in your ear. Tony and are hoping to be able to adopt Amy.”

  “Gail already hinted at that little bug.”

  “Oh! She did, did she? What do you think?”

  “We’ll have to see how it sorts out. But, Elizabeth dear, isn’t it biting off quite a lot to chew to be dealing with Amy, who’ll need an incredible amount of attention when she gets home, and a new husband, who will probably believe he needs a lot of attention as well?”

  “Tony understands completely. He’s going to
help
with Amy. After a while, when Amy is good as new, maybe we’ll go off for a few days. But we’re adults, we can be patient.”

  “But shouldn’t you postpone the wedding in that case?”

  “Well, there’s the whole issue of adoption. It was Tony’s idea to get married now if that will give us an advantage regarding adopting Amy. For me and for Gail and for Tony, Amy comes first.”

  “Of course I’m glad you all feel that way,” Mrs. Vargas continued. “But, Elizabeth, please, let me caution you to not make a major life decision based on whether you’ll get to adopt Amy or not. It still might not happen.”

  Elizabeth bit her lip. Why did she have to say that to her now? “Then Tony and I will have one another.”

  Mrs. Vargas nodded. “Yes, I guess that’s true. Well, I have a tight schedule for the rest of the day. I’ll talk to you both later.” And she was gone down the hall.

  “Why did she say that?” Elizabeth asked Gail.

  “She’s not trying to hurt you, Pet. She’s just keeping you apprised of reality.”

  Elizabeth collected herself, then nodded. “Yes, she does keep doing that with me. Ooh! Sometimes I’m a brat!”

  Gail laughed and put a comforting arm around Elizabeth’s shoulders. “At least you’re aware of it, and you’re a sweet brat. Come on, let’s see if we can take a peek at our little girl.”

Chapter XIX

Before she knew it, it was Saturday afternoon, and Elizabeth was getting into her wedding dress. She could hear commotion downstairs as Gail organized the living room. It seemed as though the doorbell had rung far too many times for the three people who were coming, but she couldn’t give it any thought, she was so nervous. She was certain that she wanted to
be
married, but right now she was equally certain that she didn’t want to go through
getting
married.

  She’d done so little planning. She got a dress and called the pastor. Tony went to the courthouse and got the marriage license. Now she realized that she should have given some thought to the notion of a reception, if only for the four of them. Five if the pastor stayed.

  Nor had she given any thought to music, although music suddenly welled up the stairs. She looked at her watch. 1:58. Well, two o’clock was when she said she’d do it, so she might as well do it, she told herself. She started down the stairs. Half-way down, Gail handed Elizabeth a bouquet of off-white tea roses and baby’s breath.

  “Ralph is going to give you away,” she leaned over and whispered.

  At the landing below Ralph stood in a tuxedo, freshly shaved and hair combed back. She hardly recognized him, he looked so debonair. As she descended towards him, Ralph smiled up at her, and she was so touched she thought she’d start to cry then and there. Of course Ralph was the perfect person to give her away, she realized, since he had been the closest idea to a friend of Grandfather’s during the last twenty years of his life. Although the part about being given away had not crossed her mind.

  When she reached the landing, Ralph extended his arm and Elizabeth took his elbow. She turned towards the living room and was amazed to see it filled with people.

  “What...” she whispered, turning to Gail, who had scampered away to her place as matron of honor.

  The chords of the wedding march burst forth and everyone, already standing, turned to watch Elizabeth walk the fifteen feet across the living room to the pastor.

  Peter stood beside Tony, both of them handsome in tuxedos. Tony looked every bit as though this was his greatest role in one of the world’s greatest films.

  Then she was repeating words and she heard Tony repeating words. They exchanged rings and she heard the pastor say, “I now pronounce you husband and wife.” Tony leaned down and kissed her gently.

  And she was married.

  Elizabeth tried to pull herself back into reality, but she felt completely disembodied. She turned to sort out who all the people were. Martha with a man Elizabeth didn’t know, Ralph, a chubby lady at a synthesizer keyboard producing the music, which continued on now with the likes of
Moon River
and other romantic songs. Gail, Peter, the pastor, Tony, of course, and two men and a woman Elizabeth didn’t know.

  Well, that was not really so many people, she reasoned, but it had sure looked like a lot when she came down the stairs only expecting to see four people.

  In the dining room, a beautiful cake caught Elizabeth’s eye. Peter opened a bottle of champagne.

  “A toast to the new couple!”

  Everyone grabbed a glass. “A toast!” they all said.

  “May you marriage be happy and your lives be long,” Peter proclaimed.

  Everyone agreed noisily, and general mayhem ensued, while Martha insisted Elizabeth cut the cake.

  “Oh, thank you, everyone, for being here! I didn’t expect... I didn’t expect it!” Elizabeth said, her voice quavering.

  “We love you too,” Martha said. “Now, cut the cake so I can put my photographer to work!”

  Marty, the man with Martha, continued firing away with a battery of cameras on his person as if they were automatic weapons.

  Tony introduced the mystery guests as Jim and Joe Johnston, brothers, and Joanna, Joe’s wife. He introduce them as his oldest and best friends, although Elizabeth had never heard Tony mention them before.

  “Friends, we might add,” Joe said to Elizabeth, smiling, “who’ve just lost a bet that the number-one-confirmed-batchelor would never get married!”

  Elizabeth laughed. “I hope you didn’t lose too much! I wouldn’t want you to not like me from the outset!”

  “We like you,” Jim insisted.

  “Yes,” Joanna agreed. “When you walked into the room, Jim leaned over and asked me how Tony snagged with a woman with so much class.”

  “I did,” Jim nodded. “I wonder how our Tony has suddenly become so clever.”

  “Okay!” Tony laughed. “Enough abuse. Let’s mingle, shall we, dear?” He swept Elizabeth away from his friends and they joined Peter, talking with Martha.

  “Say, thanks pal for being my best man,” Tony said. “I would have had Jim, but I couldn’t even find him until yesterday.”

  “The pleasure was mine,” Peter said. “And now I believe I get to kiss the bride.” Peter leaned over and kissed Elizabeth on the cheek. She smiled up at him, certain that she now fulfilled the blushing part of being a bride.

  As Peter moved back from her, saying something about how beautiful she looked, she caught a glimpse of Tony, a stormy look on his face as he studied Peter.

  Tony turned abruptly to Martha. “And who might this stunning woman be?”

  “I don’t know about ‘stunning,’ but I’m Martha, an old,
old
friend of Elizabeth and her mother’s.”

  “Her mother!” Tony exclaimed. “I thought her mother was someone who virtually didn’t exist.”

  “Very well expressed,” Martha agreed. “She virtually doesn’t exist. And more is her loss today!” Martha took Elizabeth’s hands, “you look radiant, fantastic, beautiful, Lizzie-girl.”

  ‘Thank you, Martha. Oh, Martha, I feel so guilty not inviting you. I
thought
we weren’t going to have anyone. How did you find out?”

  “Gail invited me.”

  “I couldn’t be happier! Between you and Ralph...” Ralph was standing alone behind Martha and Elizabeth reached a hand to him and brought him into the group. “I’m just so touched that you were here for me. Thank you.”

  “It makes me happier to get to see you on this day and to help you in any way, Miss Elizabeth, than you can imagine,” Ralph said shyly.

  They all partied and ate cake and hors d’oeuvres and drank champagne until dark, and then, suddenly, the house was empty as she and Tony stood at the door, saying goodnight to Gail and Peter.

  Gail, wrapped in a shawl, with a bulging shoulder bag slung over her shoulder, gave Elizabeth a hug. “I’m staying at my mother’s this week-end. I’ll see you Monday when we go to pick up Amy.”

  “All right,” Elizabeth nodded, walking them to the door. “You will go visit her tomorrow?”

  “You know I will,” Gail assured her. “Try and keep me away!”

   “And I’ll go see her, of course. Maybe I’ll see you there. Oh, wait a minute.” Elizabeth ran into the dining room, grabbed up her corsage and scurried back to the front door. She pressed it into Gail’s already full hands. “I believe you’re next in line!”

  Gail giggled. “Ah, to feel like a girl again!”

  They waved goodnight to one another, then Elizabeth closed the door and turned. She was a married woman, at home alone for the first time with... her husband.

Chapter XX

Monday morning, after Tony left for work and while Elizabeth waited for Gail to come home so they could go get Amy, Elizabeth reflected on her week-end.

  The wedding, which now she got to savor for the first moment, had been wonderful. All the people she loved had shown her how much they loved her in return. She’d never felt such warmth in her life.

  But from the moment she saw the nasty look Tony directed at Peter when he so platonically kissed her on her cheek until now, she wondered what she had done to her life.

  Perhaps Tony’s behavior that week-end, the posing and strutting, the sexual aggression, the lack of sweetness
–
the lack, it seemed to her, of thinking of her as even a person
–
was that to be her married life? Gail and Peter, and yes, even Grandfather, if that had been him on the periphery of the three dimensions, had all been right. But she would not let them know.

  More than once that week-end Peter’s soft kiss on the cheek and his hug the previous week came to her. And she wished with all her heart that she had never experienced that soft touch, that emotional openness Peter had shared with her. Because what was she to do about it anyway? Go on comparing Peter’s sensitivity to Tony’s brutish behavior for the rest of her life? She desperately hoped not.

  She had to keep her feelings about the marriage secret. Perhaps this weird, possessive, machismo attitude of Tony’s would disappear. She told herself that surely it would after they established a routine, after he saw that she would not leave him.

  All she had to do, she reminded herself, was to keep their private life secret. She had to show an exterior that said, “oh yes, we’re happy, we’re close, we’re the perfect couple.”

  Because now, more than ever, she didn’t want to lose Amy.

  She could only imagine how many women, throughout time, had given themselves in marriage, or even worse, had been given in marriage by family, believing in love and sharing and togetherness, only to discover that the man had no more intention of sharing or becoming friends than flying to Alpha Centari, which, if he did, would be better.

  She philosophized that it was peculiar indeed that all sorts of societies believed it the height of morality to give women in marriage with the expectation that they would surrender their bodies without argument, but that prostitutes, who at least chose to give their bodies, were considered to be entirely immoral. And what
that
seemed to be saying, Elizabeth thought, was that women were immoral if they had a will of their own.

  This was a new line of thinking for Elizabeth, and she thought about how she had changed tremendously over the week-end. She wondered if Gail would notice, and, if so, if she’d say anything.

  But right now, all she wanted was to hold Amy, to give her love, to tell her everything would be all right, and to mean it.

  Finally she heard Gail’s car in the driveway, then she came into the kitchen through the garage.

  “Hello, hello! Anybody home?”

  Elizabeth hurried into the kitchen. “Finally! I just about can’t stand the suspense. Let’s go get Amy!”

  Gail looked her up and down. “Can’t we girl-talk for a while?”