Ellie's Wolf (20 page)

“Quill,” she said, with something close to a sob, “that feels so good. It feels so good!”

“Are you ready to come?” he growled in her ear. “Come on, darlin’, let go.”

She came screaming his name. Her body jerked forward in a spasm that clenched her thighs around his hand and then slammed back against him. Her toes were no longer touching the ground, and she didn’t even realize it until the orgasm faded and Quill set her gently on her feet. She turned and collapsed against his chest, breathing hard.

“I was going to be quiet,” she said, thumping her head lightly against his breastbone. “Do you think they heard me in camp?”

A quiet chuckle rumbled beneath her cheek. “Yes, but it doesn’t matter. I told them not to bother us until morning unless it was an emergency.”

Ellie hid her face against him with a groan. “Oh, no. This is humiliating! Everyone will know what we’re doing.”

His hand lifted her face, and she could almost feel his eyes examining her, although it was too dark for her to see more than an outline of his head. “Ellie, are you humiliated to be my mate, my wife?”

“No! Of course not.”

“And didn’t you say that God blesses a husband and wife when they make love?”

“Yes, but I don’t want everyone to know what we’re doing!”

His hand combed through her hair. “Ellie, what do you suppose they think we’re doing? Picking flowers?”

“Well…” She dug a bare toe into the blanket and twisted it. “Okay, I suppose that’s silly. I just don’t want to feel like they’re watching.”

“No one is watching. It’s just us.” His tone turned plaintive. “And I’m feeling a little neglected. If you do something about that, I promise to try to keep quiet.”

A blush warmed her cheek, but a smile came with it. “I don’t want you to feel neglected, dearest, most generous husband. What should I do for you?”

Another silent chuckle shook him. “I’m here, entirely at your disposal, sweetest, most darling wife. You can do whatever you want.”

She kept one hand on his shoulder while she slipped the other down his body to his penis. It was hot and quivering, like she was. Her stroking fingers playing with the firm, smooth heat of him drew a groan from his throat. She did it again just to hear him make that noise.

“Last night I didn’t touch you very much,” she murmured. “I was too shy.”

“You can touch me as much as you want, anywhere you want.”

“Maybe you should lie down. If you buckle at the knees like I did, I won’t be able to hold you up.”

His hands were sure at her waist when he helped her to sit on the blanket and then laid himself down beside her. “Pet me, Ellie.”

She was becoming familiar with the width of his shoulders, the lean muscles in his chest and belly, and the strength of his arms. Even in the dark she could tell how beautifully he was made. Had she ever stroked over Neal’s body like this? She couldn’t remember doing it. Lovemaking with Neal had been wonderful, but they hadn’t played like this. He’d never licked her between her legs or given her orgasms with just his mouth and fingers. Her hand slowed in her petting. In fact, she hadn’t always had an orgasm. Many times she had gone to sleep frustrated while Neal had snored beside her, sated and content. Quill had always given her pleasure before taking his own. Of course they’d been married for only a day.

“Ellie?”

“Sorry. Just thinking.”

He sighed theatrically. “My body must bore you.”

“What? No! I think you’re beautiful! Your shoulders are so wide and strong.” She swept her hands up his shoulders. “I could stare at you all day. In the library at Kearney there are art books with pictures of men without clothes on. You are more handsome than any of them.”

She trailed her hands down his body to his penis, shaping it between her palms, before stroking a fingertip over the sac below. He shuddered under the gentle caress. She did it again, fascinated by his reaction to her touch.

“If we were still standing,” he growled, “I’d fall to my knees right now.”

How amazing. This strong man had won a bloody fight against brutal men, but the lightest touch of her finger could bring him low. Emboldened by the knowledge of her power over him, she leaned close him, bringing the head of his penis to her mouth.

“Quill, in Omaha, did women lick men here, like you licked me between my legs?”

His voice was a strangled croak. “Yeah, sometimes.”

Against her tongue, he was firm and a little salty. It wasn’t unpleasant, but what she particularly enjoyed was the way he panted and moaned every time she dragged her tongue up the hot length of him. She used her teeth to nibble very gently along the flaring crown. His body trembled almost violently when she put the head of his penis inside her mouth and sucked. A tearing noise made her lift her head. He came free from her mouth with a small popping sound.

“What was that? Quill, did you rip the blanket?”

“Can’t help it,” he panted. “Can’t wait anymore.” In less time than it took for her to open her mouth to scold him, he pulled her beneath him. “Open your legs.”

He pushed inside her with a single hard thrust, relentless in his drive until he was fully inside her. A sound close to a victorious war cry ripped out of him. Then he began to move. Ellie just hung on, lost in the sensations his movements roused. It didn’t take long for either of them to orgasm. Ellie just barely managed not to scream his name this time, but only because her teeth were clenched. He screamed, though, a howl that tore from his throat as he fell on top of her.

They lay together in a sweaty tangle of naked limbs for several minutes, breathing hard. Quill’s weight was almost uncomfortably heavy, but he was warm, and the night air was chilly. After a bit, he shifted to her side. Grateful, Ellie took a deep breath and cuddled closer to him to absorb his warmth. His arm gathered her close.

“You’re cold?” he asked.

“A little.”

He sat up and twisted to spread the other blanket over them. “There. That better?”

She pressed close to him again. “Yes. You take such good care of me.”

His arm pulled her to lie half over his chest with her head on his shoulder, her breast pressed to his. “I will always take care of you. You’re my wife and my mate, and nothing is more important than keeping you safe and happy.”

She put her arm over his chest and squeezed. “I’m very lucky. I’m so glad you won the Bride Fight in Ellsworth.”

“If I had lost, I would have taken you away from the winner.” His matter-of-fact tone was belied by an underlying growl.

“Would you have killed him?”

“If I had to. You’re mine, forever.”

Such a flat, brutal declaration shouldn’t have soothed her, but it did. “I’m here,” she murmured against his throat. “I’m yours.”

He lifted her chin to give her a gentle kiss. “I love you, Ellie.”

“I lo—”

Her voice stumbled over Neal’s memory. She tried again, but the words were stuck in a quicksand of grief and guilt. It had been only a little over five months since Neal’s death. Marrying another man was one thing, unavoidable in a world where lonely men outnumbered single women two hundred to one. Cutting Neal out of her heart to love another man was something very different. She couldn’t do it. She just couldn’t. Not yet.

“I like you. Very much. I’m glad to be your wife.” Was that good enough? She tried to see his expression, but even though they were inches away from each other it was too dark. Her hands clenched and opened. She lay her head back down on his shoulder. She didn’t feel him breathing, only the steady thump of his heart and the stiffness in his muscles. “I’m sorry.”

His chest rose with a trembling breath. “It’s all right. I don’t want to hear lies.”

The pain threading his voice wound around her heart. “I know I’ll grow to love you. I’ve only known you a short time. Love takes time to develop and grow.”

His hand smoothed over her tangled hair. “It didn’t for me. I loved you from the moment my wolf chose you. Do you believe I only like you?”

She scraped a fingernail over his breastbone. “No. I believe you love me. You have shown me you love me. You know what Paul said about love?”

“Paul who?” His voice was tinged with possessive jealousy.

A reluctant laugh bubbled up. Quill hadn’t knelt through hour-long family worship sessions every morning for seventeen years. She still had most of her father’s sermons memorized. “The apostle Paul, from the Bible. He wrote that love is patient and kind. It’s not rude and not self-seeking, and it does not keep track of wrongs. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.”

“A man would have to be perfect to do all that. I’ll do my best, but I’m not perfect.”

“No, probably not. No one is. But you’ve been patient and kind to me, and you’re willing to protect me. That’s how I know you love me. I want to make you happy. I want to make you laugh, and I want to be a good wife to you.” She moved her belly against him, hoping new life might already be growing there. “I want to give you children.”

His arms crushed her to him. “A man can’t ask for more than that, darlin’. Even if you never love me, I’ll be happy with what you can give me.”

“I’ll love you someday. I know it.”

He was quiet for a moment. “Does it bother you that I’m not a Christian?”

“Does it bother you that I am?” she countered.

“No. For the Lakota, religion is personal. It’s spiritual and individual. Most of the Wolf Clan follow the traditional religion, or a mix with Catholicism. I’m not very spiritual, but there’s no reason for me to try to change your beliefs. I’m happy if your religion makes you happy. You have yours, and I have mine. Good enough?”

She pressed a light kiss to his throat. “Good enough,” she agreed.

She fell asleep on top of him and dreamt of Neal and Quill locked together in a bloody fight to win her heart. When she woke she wasn’t sure which of them had won, only that she felt bruised and pummeled as if she had been standing between them as they fought.

The dream stayed with Ellie the next day. She knew Quill could tell there was something wrong, but she just shrugged. They got dressed and folded the blankets before walking back to camp hand in hand. To deflect his concern she scolded him for the small rips in the blanket they’d lain on last night.

“But I couldn’t help it!” He defended himself with a small smile that hinted at wickedness. “You made me do it.”

“Now I’ll have to mend it.” She gave an exaggerated sigh. “You be good tonight, or I’ll stay in camp with Tommy and Connor.”

He made his face contrite. “I promise I’ll be good. Cross my heart.”

Having him tease and joke with her was fun. She was giggling when they reached camp. Everyone else was up, and breakfast was waiting. Her initial embarrassment was forgotten when Connor launched himself over the grass at her knees.

“Mama!” he shrieked.

The weight and warmth of her son in her arms was a gift she’d always be thankful for. To Neal, for giving her Connor, and to Quill, for giving Connor back to her. How would Neal have felt about another man raising his son?

“Mama.” Connor’s hands patted her face. “You hungry, Mama?”

“Yes, I am. What’s for breakfast?”

After he ate a quick breakfast, Quill tilted her face for a quick kiss. Then he gave Connor a smacking kiss on the cheek and lifted Tommy up for a kiss too. “I’ll be scouting this morning. I’ll see you after lunch. Boys, mind your mother.”

Tommy gave him a brilliant grin. “We will, Dad.”

They were a family. Ellie felt a glow at the idea. Only a short time ago she’d been a widowed mother of a two-year-old with no friends or family near. She glanced around at Paint dousing the fire and Snow packing up their gear and knew she was safe and protected by men who valued her. Some of the men stripped off their clothes to turn into wolves, drawing a watery giggle from her. Her new family was a bit strange, perhaps, but brave and loyal. She was lucky.

Tommy was a good boy. A wave of gladness that they had been able to adopt him rushed over Ellie. She watched while he scampered off to the collect the wolves’ clothes and hand them over to Sand to put in the saddlebag. He gave her a little finger wave as he waited for Paint to lift him to the back of his horse. What would Tommy be like in ten years? She hoped she hadn’t done wrong by taking him away from his aunt. She decided, after a long moment of thinking about it, she wasn’t wrong. Mrs. Justiss should have seen how unhappy Tommy was and done something about it.

Snow led Ellie’s horse over to her and boosted her into the saddle before lifting Connor to sit before her. He raised a quizzical brow at her. “You are distracted. What are you thinking about?”

She waved at Tommy. “He’s our son now, mine and Quill’s. Will he be a member of the Pack? Even though he’s not one of you? Will Connor?”

“Sure they will. And they are part of us now. Not every member of the Wolf Clan was born to us. Tommy’s a good kid. So is Connor.”

She had seen all the men treat Tommy and Connor with patient affection. Even when the boys pestered them with questions and whined from tiredness, the men had been kind. Reassured that Tommy would have the love and acceptance he deserved, Ellie gathered up the reins. They set out at a trot, a woman, two boys, five mounted men, a trio of packhorses, a half dozen spare horses, and two wolves. Quill, Standing Bear, White Horse, and Lance were running on four paws ahead to find the way and behind them to be sure no one was following them.

“I’ll be glad when we get to the den,” Ellie told Paint. “I wonder if Carla has had her baby yet.”

“I hope so.” Paint shuddered. “It was horrible when Colby was born. Who can stand hearing a woman scream like that? You’ve never seen so many wolves running around in helpless circles. Normally when a woman screams, we want to find what is bothering her and kill it.”

“Oh, dear.” Ellie remembered one of Taye’s men coming to Overdahl’s Mill, where she and Neal where living, with the news that Carla and Taye had a son. It was the first time she’d seen one of the Pack look exhausted. “I hope so too.”

“It’s hard for a man to see the woman he loves suffer to give birth.” Paint’s voice was very low. “And it’s ten times harder if something goes wrong, and she…doesn’t make it.”