Endless (34 page)

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Authors: Jessica Shirvington

BOOK: Endless
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Hmm.

‘Oh,’ Steph continued, ‘Griffin said if I spoke to you to tell you your dad’s doing fine. He’s up and talking and confirmed that Evelyn had been waiting for Lilith to make her move.’

Lincoln tapped my shoulder, pointing to his watch.

‘Damn. Steph, I have to go. Did Dapper have any success figuring out what the thirteenth ingredient is?’ I asked quickly, even as I felt a tug on my memory. I couldn’t fight the feeling that I was missing something here.

‘Yeah, but I don’t know anything about it. He’s being very secretive, says he needs to talk to some elder first, but that it’s definitely from the angel realm. Something to do with life-force, I don’t know.’

Lincoln tapped me again.

‘I miss you,’ I told her, glum.

‘I miss you too, babe. I’ll see you soon so please don’t get dead before I get there. I bought you a T-shirt with a bling pyramid on it!’

Still feeling sad from my conversation with Steph, I moved back out to the rocking chair, selecting my one and leaving Lincoln’s free.

Lincoln disappeared for a while and returned with two instant coffees.

Not perfect, but caffeine is caffeine.

We sipped in comfortable silence. If felt normal and I pretended for a while that we were just ordinary people, even boyfriend and girlfriend, away for the weekend, enjoying each other’s company. Lincoln must have been thinking the same thing, or just sensed my feeling, because he jumped into small talk and we bantered back and forth while munching on a packet of Oreos.

Finally
, our make-believe chat ended when Lincoln asked, ‘Have you had any thoughts about next year? Do you think you’ll try for university?’

I lifted a shoulder.

‘I know you had to give up your place on the Fenton course. I’m sorry, Vi. I’ve been meaning to tell you that I know a few people who could probably help get you a place there next year if you’d like.’

There was a time when I definitely would
like
. But I shook my head. ‘Thanks, but don’t bother. Even if we make it through this, there’ll always be something.’

‘That’s not true. You don’t have to give up on your dreams just because you’re Grigori.’

We were silent again for a while. Lincoln checked his watch and I could tell he was thinking he should patrol again soon. I knew I should tell him what I’d done, about my crazy, impulsive act out in the woods earlier, but when I opened my mouth, something completely different came out.

‘I don’t love him,’ I blurted.

I heard Lincoln’s breath catch. But then he relaxed back into his chair. ‘Did you?’

I swallowed, nervous now. Why had I opened this floodgate? ‘I I cared about him. I think I saw a side to him that no one else got to see and I don’t think it was all fake. There is good in him and even for all the bad I know he cared.’

‘Not exactly an answer, Vi.’

‘No. I
know.’ I sighed. ‘I was so mad at you and I
wanted
to stop loving you, I
wanted
to love him. I was confused and angry and about to jump off a really big cliff. You had just told me that we could never be together and …’

‘And?’

‘And he made it better.’ The confession stung. ‘He made the pain go away, replaced it with other things. I think I became kind of addicted to him, to his abilities. But,’ I looked at Lincoln now, letting out the vulnerability I always tried to keep hidden. He needed to see the truth. ‘The answer is no. And I’m sorry for everything that happened. I’m sorry to you and I’m sorry to him, too.’

Lincoln studied my eyes, gazing at me with nothing short of admiration – which I knew I didn’t deserve – and possibly more.

‘Violet Eden, you have nothing to apologise for,’ he said.

I felt his presence only a split second before he spoke.

‘Speak for yourself,’ Phoenix said, stepping out from the nearby tree-line, hands in his pockets. ‘I’d rather like to have that apology.’

CHAPTER TWENTY-SEVEN

‘For the son of man has come to save that which was lost.

Matthew 18:11

E
verything
happened so fast.

Lincoln leaped up from his rocking chair and over the railing of the verandah, landing on the lawn in front of Phoenix, who moved into striking zone with the speed of wind.

Phoenix grinned wickedly at Lincoln, his hatred on show. ‘No dagger.’ He made a tsk’ing sound. ‘Sloppy.’

I was on the lawn by then, too, and stepped up beside Lincoln. ‘But I have mine,’ I said.

Phoenix didn’t take his attention off Lincoln, the two of them circling each other.

‘I’d be lying if I said I haven’t dreamed of this moment – taking you down once and for all,’ Phoenix said, tauntingly, moving in short gusts of wind.

Lincoln tracked him, keeping up. ‘Funny. You don’t seem to make it into my dreams.’

‘That’s because you’re busy dreaming of things I’ve already had,’ Phoenix said, gesturing to me but not taking his eyes off Lincoln.

‘Stop it,’ I warned him.

Phoenix
smiled at Lincoln. ‘Just wake up, did we?’

‘Violet, go inside,’ Lincoln ordered.

He did
not
just say that.

‘You heard him, lover. He obviously has a lot of pent-up frustration.’ Phoenix’s smile broadened. ‘Understandably. Best to let him try. You should run along while he gets a beating for his efforts.’

My eyes narrowed in on the two of them but as I did, I pushed out my senses, scanning the area as far as I could. There were no other exiles nearby.

Phoenix darted me a look before returning to Lincoln. The hate fuming between the two of them was dense in the night air.

Shit.

‘I invited him!’ I blurted, regretting that I hadn’t made it a priority to tell Lincoln what I’d done earlier. The truth was I’d expected Phoenix to show up either instantly or not at all. When he hadn’t, I’d started to wonder if I’d been wrong about his intentions.

At this revelation, Lincoln looked at me with disbelief. ‘You
brought
him here?’

I bit my lip.

Using Lincoln’s distraction, Phoenix launched himself onto his nemesis, bringing him down to the ground, ramming a fist into his jaw. I was fairly certain I heard something crack. Lincoln responded in kind – the impact of his own closed fist across Phoenix’s jaw stunning him enough for Lincoln to throw Phoenix off him and into the air.

Phoenix landed on his feet, feline-like.

But before Phoenix made it back into the striking zone and Lincoln was up and ready again, I leaped between them.

‘Move
,’ Lincoln snapped at me.

I ignored him and faced Phoenix. I knew who the real threat was.

‘Lover,’ Phoenix said, dabbing a finger at the cut on his lip, showing how hard Lincoln’s hit had been; drawing blood from an exile was never easy. ‘Be patient. This will only take a moment and then you and I will have all the time in the world for …’ he glanced at Lincoln, ‘other things.’

‘Shut up, Phoenix. God, I’m so sick of hearing you call me “lover”. You asked me for help. I know you did. I let down my shields, I showed you the way to us because, as crazy as it is, I think you might actually want to stop Lilith from hurting those kids.’

Phoenix’s face twisted and I couldn’t help but feel a little satisfaction to see my scolding was having an effect.

‘Now,’ I continued, hands on hips, ‘you can come inside and talk with us. You will tell us what we need to know and how we can stop her, or you can go. But you,’ I glanced over my shoulder at Lincoln, fury still raging in his eyes, ‘and your male egos will
not
be fighting tonight because, let me break it down.’ I looked between them again. ‘If either one of you lands another punch then this conversation is over and those kids are going to die.’

Silence.

‘I’m going to put the kettle on,’ I said, taking their silence for agreement. For now.

We sat around the kitchen table, coffees in hand, tensions running high. Suddenly the cabin seemed very small.

Lincoln and
Phoenix sat opposite one another, their eyes burning with malice.

It was strange seeing them together. It caused an awkward sensation in my gut.

Phoenix looked incredible as per usual. He was dressed in black slim-line pants and a fitted black shirt. His opaline hair rippled with dazzling silver highlights.

He’s just a creature of lust
, I reminded myself.

I couldn’t deny that being in close proximity to him affected me. It wasn’t in the same way as with Lincoln; it was raw and laden with guilt. Because I knew it wasn’t real. What Phoenix did to me was a controlled manipulation of my own emotions, but I longed for it anyway. I’d just explained to Lincoln earlier that I’d been addicted to Phoenix’s abilities and now, looking at him, I realised it was more than that. I was drawn to him on a deeper level, because of our connection and what we’d once shared.

‘You helped us in the subway. You led us to the other child,’ I said. Statement not question. When Phoenix didn’t respond, I went on. ‘You’ve been trying to get to me in my dreams – not to hurt me, but to help us.’

Phoenix was statue-still.

Finally, he shifted. ‘You kept pushing me out and once you were behind the Academy shields it was impossible.’

I remembered the force field that divided us last time.

‘Have you always known I could sense your emotions more than others?’ I asked, noting that Lincoln was stewing silently. But I needed to know. What I felt from Phoenix was more than just his emotional run-off and unlike anything I felt from anyone else.

Phoenix flinched
. He knew what I was asking. ‘Ever since I healed you the connection has been there.’

I explained to Lincoln, ‘I think I can sense some of Phoenix’s emotions even when he doesn’t intend me to.’

‘Sensational,’ Lincoln said, flat.

‘It’s not like that,’ I said, blushing. ‘But I think that it helps me understand him at times.’

‘And she does seem to know every single inch of me,’ Phoenix taunted.

‘What are you doing here, Phoenix?’ Lincoln ground out each word.

Phoenix’s facade broke, just for a few seconds, but I saw it. The darkness around his eyes, the desperation that I’d sensed in the tunnels. I felt his weariness.

He put his hands palm down on the table, considering his words carefully. ‘I don’t have a solution. I can only confirm that it is likely we will all die very soon. Nothing I can do will change that but unlike some …’ His eyes bored into mine, ‘I’m not ready to confess all my sins and be absolved.’

‘As if absolution would ever be yours!’ Lincoln snarled.

‘True,’ Phoenix agreed.

I gnawed on the inside of my cheek. This wasn’t going well.

‘Then what are you here for?’ Lincoln pushed. I could see one of his hands fisted on his thigh. I could only imagine how angry he was going to be with me after we got Phoenix out of here.

Phoenix shrugged and leaned back in his seat. But his apparent openness wasn’t fooling me. He was highly strung. ‘I don’t kill kids. I’m here to help you save them. And make the agreement that we either destroy the Scripture or return it to you afterwards, whichever opportunity presents itself first.’

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