Endless (40 page)

‘Will she?’

‘She’s so confident, she probably will.’

I felt a sharp stabbing pain in my lower back. I grabbed the collar of Phoenix’s shirt and pulled him against the bars. ‘Please, go to Lincoln. They are hurting him.’

Phoenix looked at me sorrowfully, but nodded.

It was a sorry thing, but right then I was comforted by the knowledge that after my death, Lincoln would not have to suffer the pain of seeing me and feeling it – his soul would shatter the moment I died and then even his own death wouldn’t hurt him.

I moved to the back of my cage, the children surrounding it as if I were some kind of magnet. Their eyes were alight with a dangerous emotion. Hope.

My chest tightened and I suddenly felt the weight of so many lives hanging in the balance.

‘Breathe,’ a young voice said.

I spun to see one of the oldest children.

‘Breathe,’ he said again.

I realised I was panting, on the verge of hyperventilating. I tried to calm myself down. I thought it wasn’t going to work, but then I felt him.

Lincoln.

Our bond, our souls. It wasn’t like when Phoenix had infiltrated my emotions, this was more intimate and natural. He was just there, wrapping himself around me and comforting me like afternoon sun seeping into my skin. I crouched and closed my eyes, concentrating on the warmth that was spreading through my body and into my soul.

‘Good,’ said the young voice.

I opened my eyes and watched the boy, amazed. He was maybe eleven and from the way the younger kids watched him, he was a leader.

‘What’s your name?’ I asked.

‘Simon,’ he said, standing tall.

I nodded to him. ‘Thanks, Simon.’

‘That’s okay. Took us all a bit of time to adjust, down here. Cages and stink don’t make happy thoughts.’

I sat down, still buzzing from feeling my connection to Lincoln, regaining strength by the second. I could feel that he had been beaten, but just as he was there for me, I knew he was feeling me too. Together, we had a safe place.

And we needed it.

‘Are you here to save us?’ came a small voice from behind.

I turned to face a tiny blonde girl, no more than six years old. She was stick thin, wearing what looked like a nightie, ripped and dirty, her face bruised and her exposed feet blackened. Her huge brown eyes blinked at me as she waited for my reply.
All
their eyes were wide and focused on me.

So many. An arrow for each of them. There’s no way …

I swallowed
and glanced at Simon, who was watching me carefully. So young, but he seemed to look at me with understanding.

He turned to the others and spoke confidently. ‘Of course she is. Why else do you think God sent her to us?’

The other children began to nod slowly, still watching me. Some were whispering in other languages while others attempted to translate with charade-style sign language. I had to give them something but… I couldn’t lie.

‘I’m here to try.’ My voice shook, because suddenly I was questioning our choice. We had looked at the situation from every possible perspective, but we hadn’t been able to see a way of bringing in forces en masse without risking the lives of the children. Yet like
this
, with Lincoln and I locked up, separated, unarmed and at their mercy … What had we done?

Instinct still told me we could trust Phoenix. I prayed that I was right. If he turned on us now, it would all have been for nothing.

I moved to stand up, but my legs shook and my vision blurred. I fell back down to my knees before everything went black.

I breathed in deeply. The air was stifling, instantly cooking my throat from the inside. I gagged and sat up, my eyes blinking into the bright light and trying to focus.

I was in the desert.

Goddamn desert, again!

I coughed uncontrollably, squinting into the light. One of them was there, I just couldn’t tell which one.

‘Is this it?’ I asked, still struggling with each breath as I tried to get to my knees. I didn’t care who it was, I just couldn’t let my guard down. ‘Is this the freaking “bright light” everyone talks about? Because if it is, let me tell you, your customer service desk is going to be overflowing with unhappy clients.’

‘We don’t provide service beyond expiry.’

Nox.

My eyes began to adjust and confirm just that, then they widened. ‘You look ridiculous!’ I said. I couldn’t stop staring. He was dressed in full leathers, very different from his usual suave and sophisticated wardrobe. I wasn’t about to admit it to him, but he looked hot. Like some kind of fantastical creature painted in a shade of honey to match his shoulder-length hair – that was currently blowing freely despite the still air.

‘You could make a fortune as a portable wind machine,’ I quipped.

Nox smiled knowingly.

‘I thought you might like this. I believe I spy a tinge of pink in those cheeks.’

‘If you’re going to ask me out on a date, the answer is no,’ I snapped, getting to my feet.

He threw his head back and laughed. ‘I’d sooner throw myself into the pits of Hell.’

I blinked. ‘That was harsh.’

‘That was honest. Though… I will admit that of all humans you do… intrigue me at times.’ He looked me up and down as if he could see Lincoln’s and my bond. ‘I see you’ve made your choice then,’ but his smile was secretive and unnerving.

I put my hands on my hips. ‘What is this, anyway? Where are we?’

‘A dream.’

‘You put me under? You can do that?’ I questioned, alarmed.

He shrugged, looking his outfit over. ‘If necessary.’

‘Why? Why didn’t you just cross the realms?’

‘The Hag might’ve sensed my presence. We thought that unwise.’

‘Do you think the colour is right?’

‘What?’ I asked, increasingly confused with his left-field comments.

‘The outfit. Do you think I should’ve gone with the more predictable black?’

I huffed. ‘Nox, there are children here. At least a hundred of them. Lilith is going to sacrifice them and I can’t save them all! And you’re worried about the colour of your stupid outfit? What’s wrong with you?’

His eyes narrowed, his usual off-hand attitude gone. ‘I’m eternal. I have time to ponder when it suits me. Do not group us as like beings.’ The desert fell into darkness. Shadows, impossibly thick and opaque closed in around me, rising from the ground and falling from the sky. My throat started to constrict with fear.

‘You think you know me?’ Nox bellowed. ‘Can you feel me?’

The shadows increased, moving through me, tearing at the very fabric of my existence, and somehow I knew that if left to their own devices they would happily hold me for all eternity.

‘I am everywhere. I am not one, not many! I
am
Malign!’ He roared, his voice surrounding me, his menacing power reverberating through every particle of air.

Suddenly, he was in front of me. I gasped. It would take barely a thought for him to kill me.

But just as quickly as it had fallen, the darkness receded into daylight. The searing sun returned and he moved in closer than usual, his hair blowing once more in the non-existent breeze.

He regarded me patiently.

I swallowed, careful not to make a sudden movement. ‘I like the colour,’ I said.

He nodded and stepped back to his place. ‘I think you’re right. It stands out. Says I’m a leader, not a follower.’

Silence rang loud until Nox chose to speak again. A chair appeared from out of nowhere. He sat. ‘You should sit, too.’

I looked around, not wanting to upset him again. ‘There are no more chairs,’ I said.

He looked at me like I was an idiot. ‘This is a dream. Create one.’

I shook my head. ‘I’ll stand.’

He shrugged. ‘Are you confident in your choice?’

‘Well, I don’t know how to make a chair,’ I argued.

He snapped a wrist at me. ‘Keep up! Not the chair. You are locked in a cage. You are at the Hag’s mercy. Your mother captured. Your love imprisoned.’

‘We’re trying to save the children.’

‘Where is your army?’

I shook my head. ‘I don’t have an army. I… We had to come alone.’

A slow smile spread across his face. ‘Come now, young one, tell me what we both know.’

I didn’t respond.

His smile broadened. ‘You have not come alone at all. You came with the dark.’

I stood tall, despite the fear in the pit of my stomach. ‘Yes. We came with Phoenix. He’s helping us.’

‘Indeed. Darkness can achieve much. But are you ready to travel the road that it must take you on?’

‘What do you mean?’

He stood. ‘The playing field is soon to be evened. I do hope you survive Lilith. Perhaps you can be the power that they believe you already are.’

‘Who? What power? What are you talking about?’

He gave me a smug look and I knew he would say no more, so I pushed on.

‘Can someone else bring Lilith across the realms? If I’m… If I don’t make it?’

He sighed, bored now. ‘They can return her to the pits. It may be enough. But no, only you can bring her across the realms.’

‘Why?’

He raised one eyebrow high. ‘Because you are the Keshet.’

Something hard pinged against my head. Then again. My eyes opened and I curled into a ball, just as another hit came to my arm. ‘Ow!’

‘Wake up!’ a small voice said.

Something else hit my back. I looked down and saw small rocks – no, chunks of concrete.

‘Okay, okay! I’m okay,’ I said, before another one hit me.

‘What happened to you?’ Simon asked, panting.

I put a hand to my head. I could sense Lincoln. He was worried for me, as if he hadn’t been able to sense me during my dream.

I’m okay.

I kept thinking it, over and over, until I felt him calm. Then I turned to Simon. ‘I guess I fainted. I’m fine now.’

His concern remained but he nodded.

Seeing the nervous expressions on the faces of so many children left a lump in my throat. Then one little boy caught my eye. Still in his blue-and-white pyjamas and huddled next to an older girl, it was the little boy Olivier had taken. He was alive.

I smiled
at him and dug my fingernails into my palms to stop from crying. I didn’t know how much longer I would have until they came for me, but I decided to try and focus all my attention on the children.

For the next two hours I listened to them tell me, one by one, how they had been taken from their homes, how their families had been tortured, burned, murdered. Each of them, having already known the loss of one parent, understood all too well what losing the other would mean. They had nothing left and nowhere to go, even if they were to survive.

I wanted to scream for them. I wanted to rip Lilith apart for doing this. Phoenix too. Even myself. We had all played a part. But I held back the emotion and devoted my attention to the children.

‘There is a place where you can all go,’ I told them. ‘There are people who will look after you and keep you safe. You will become a part of their family. It won’t be the same as your real families, but it will be amazing. And when you grow up you will have choices. If you want to you can become very strong and very powerful.’

‘Like you?’ One of the smallest boys named Tom asked. His face was covered in freckles and he had pale blue eyes and fire-engine red hair. I’d never seen hair that colour before. He couldn’t have been more than six.

I nodded. ‘Like me.’

‘Would we be a part of your family?’ Another little girl named Katie asked. You could tell she’d had a tough life already. She held herself in a way that suggested she expected nothing more than suffering.

I smiled
at her. ‘You’ll have family all over the world.’

She smiled back and my heart broke.

I
have
to save these kids.

‘Have you seen the man with the purple hair. The one who brought me in?’

The children nodded.

‘We call him Midnight Stars. He sneaks us in some food every now and then and tells us to hide it,’ Simon explained.

I smiled. Midnight Stars was a perfect name for Phoenix.

‘Well, if anything happens to me, or if I can’t get back to you, do what he says, okay? You can trust him. He’ll keep you safe.’

The children nodded.

Simon leaned into the bars and they gave a little under the pressure, making me wonder if I could pull them down with my strength. He reached his hand through, stretching it towards me.

‘We pray every night for God to protect us. Will you pray with us?’

‘Oh,’ I said, taken aback. ‘I… The truth is, I’m not sure I believe in God.’

Simon’s reaction was shock at first, followed by confusion, and then… He smiled.

‘You’re testing us. I can see that.’ He nodded, more to himself than me. ‘Our faith will not waver. You will not see us lose our way.’

I wasn’t sure why he was speaking to me like that, but he seemed to find some kind of strength from it and as a result the other children did too. I smiled as he watched me. I was glad he had faith. I didn’t know how I felt about it, but then I knew a lot more things about the world of God and angels than these kids and I wasn’t about to strip away their beliefs when they had so little else to comfort them.

I shuffled
closer to Simon and took his hand. ‘I can pray with you.’

All around me, children dropped to their knees and bowed their heads, a few turning away. I waited for Simon to start a prayer, to beg for their survival, for their families to be in Heaven. I braced myself. But nothing,
nothing
, could’ve prepared me for what happened next.