Even the Devil Needs Love (4 page)

She came on a long, splintering cry, calling his name over and over. She trembled beneath him, the muscles of her pussy clamping down around him, nearly strangling his cock, and he exploded inside her on a harsh grunt, his seed shooting deep into the hot tunnel of her pulsing cunt.

He collapsed against her, violent tremors rocking his entire frame as he struggled to drag in a full breath of air. Mindful of his heavy weight, he rolled off of her, pulling her atop him. She lay draped over his body, her hair fanning out across his chest. He stroked her back, his fingers playing in the soft curls. He fell asleep with her nestled in his arms, listening to the gentle thumping of her heart beating in time with his.

Chapter Three

Lucifer awoke with a start. He disentangled himself from a sleeping Lilith, his clothes covering his nude body in seconds with just one simple thought. He stalked out of his chambers, his gaze searching. He’d felt the shift instantly. Whenever one not born of the Underworld entered his domain he felt it.

He walked the corridors, following the source of power, and when he turned the corner he drew up short, stopping just a few feet away from the intruder.

“You are bold, Odin, daring to set foot in my kingdom without my permission.” The burly god’s blue eyes narrowed, his hulking frame inching towards Lucifer.

“And you are bold to take what does not belong to you. I only came to get what’s mine.”

“I released that soul already.”

Odin’s nostrils flared. “I have the soul. I’m referring to Lilith.”

A rage Lucifer had never felt before took hold of him. Not even when Lilith left him had he felt this, not even when he’d been forced to suffer the humiliation of knowing she’d turned to Odin had he felt such an all consuming dark anger.

Everything in his line of vision turned red, his incisors exploding in his mouth. He closed the distance so quickly, so quietly, the foolish god had no time to react.

The first blow sent Odin stumbling. He stared up at Lucifer, his eyes wide with surprise. Lucifer never gave him a chance to react. He struck him again and again, until he lay crumbled at Lucifer’s feet, holding his side and struggling for air.

Lucifer stooped down, grasping Odin by the collar. “Let’s be clear about one thing. My wife has never belonged to you, will never belong to you. No matter how many times she showed up on your doorstep, you should have never taken her in, and certainly never lain with her.”

“She was hurting, and
you
hurt her.” Odin gasped for air. “Lilith was, and still is, my dear friend. What was I supposed to do? I could not turn her away.”

“You didn’t have to sleep with her,” he shouted. “You could have taken her in without bedding her. You only did it to strike out at me. You used my wife as a pawn in your competition with me.”

Odin’s eyes widened and he shook his head. “That’s not true. I care about Lilith,” he said vehemently. “And it was only once, just once! Lilith still loves you. As much as I wished she could love me in return, her heart belongs to you.”

Lucifer’s eyes narrowed, Odin’s words slowly starting to pierce the haze of rage that consumed him. “If that’s true, then why did you come here? Why risk your life for a woman who you just said still loves her husband?”

“I came because I love her. I wanted to be sure she was safe, that she was okay.”

Lucifer’s fist clenched tighter around Odin’s shirt. “I would never hurt my wife, and she knows she is free to come and go as she pleases.” He may have orchestrated her return, and confined her temporarily, but he had no power to hold Lilith there for longer than a few days if she chose to leave again.

He relaxed his hold on Odin, although he didn’t let him go. “Lilith is not yours to protect or to love. She belongs to me and she is mine to love, mine to protect, mine to make love to, mine to cherish. Mine and
only
mine
.
” He curled back his lips, baring his incisors, and menace glowed in his sharp eyes.
“If you ever set foot back into my domain without my permission, I shall kill you. If you touch my wife again, I will kill you. For many reasons, I spared you once, and I have done so this time as well. I shall not do so again.”

Lucifer released Odin and stood over him, his gaze unwavering until the god nodded stiffly, acknowledging he’d heard his words and had been forewarned.

Lucifer spun around, nearly colliding with Samael.

“Lucfier. What have you done?” His cousin’s gaze darted between a crumpled Odin and an enraged Lucifer.

He stepped around his cousin. “You need to leave, Samael.” He cast a quick glance over his shoulder. “You
both
need to leave. That has been the problem in my marriage with Lilith—too many outside influences, but not anymore. Tell my mother I appreciate her concern, but Lilith and I are the only ones who can work on our marriage.”

He didn’t spare Odin or Samael another glance, his booted feet echoing in the darkened hallways as he stomped away. Seconds later he felt two subtle shifts of power and knew both Odin and Samael were gone.

By the time Lucifer made it back to his chambers, he was once again in control of himself and his torrid emotions and temper.

He slipped inside, his clothes disappearing instantly, and settled into bed, pulling Lilith within the circle of his arms once again.

He absently stroked her back, his hands caressing her smooth skin, while his mind sifted through the puzzle that Lilith had presented to him. The moment he’d entered her body, Lucifer had known that she hadn’t slept with anyone in a while, but that didn’t mean anything, except that she hadn’t had sex. That said nothing of the loyalties of her heart. But if Odin could be believed, his wife wasn’t in love with the god. And if she wasn’t in love with Odin, then maybe, just maybe, she was still in love with him.

And if that was the case, then maybe there was still hope for them after all.

* * * *

Lilith awoke in Lucifer’s arms, a satiated smile tugging at the edges of her lips, but the moment her gaze collided with his, her smile faded, and she knew what was to come next.

“How long has it been since you’ve warmed another’s bed?”

She ducked her head, buying herself time until she’d be forced to answer his question. The moment he’d pushed inside her unyielding body, he’d known, and she knew he would demand an explanation from her. But the truth was humiliating, and after what she’d seen yesterday, walking in on him when he’d been in the midst of fucking that demon, she had no desire to admit it to him. It was clear he’d moved on with his life, she wanted him to believe that she had too.

He clamped his hands on either side of her face, forcing her gaze to meet his. “I can see the wheels turning in your head, but I want an answer, and I want the truth. When was the last time you fucked Odin?”

Her heart stuttered in her chest, and she would have dipped her gaze had he not held her firmly.

“What does it matter? We both betrayed our vows.”
You more so than me
, she wanted to hurl at him, but held her tongue, because she knew deep down that simply wasn’t true. He may have taken more women to his bed than she men, but he hadn’t broken their marriage.
She’d
done that.

Hot tears burned the backs of her eyes, but she blinked them back. Her revelation would leave her completely exposed to him, and she fought against it, holding on to her anger in order to mask her embarrassment.

“It matters to me,” he whispered.

She stilled. She’d expected his fury, so the tortured look in his eyes joined by his broken whisper tore at her heart. Damn him. Damn him for dragging her back there and forcing her to feel things she’d wanted to keep buried, to keep hidden from him forever.

She drew in a breath, a long, tense silence stretching between them before she finally found the nerve to simply tell him the truth. “I know what you want to hear, but I won’t lie to you. I slept with Odin once, right after I first left you.” She almost faltered at his sharp intake of breath, but she forced herself to go on, forced herself to tell him everything so that maybe he could finally forgive her, and then she could finally forgive herself. “I know there is no excuse for what I did. It was just that I was so lonely and unhappy here. When I left, I thought you wouldn’t notice, that you wouldn’t even care. It was childish and selfish of me to run to Odin, but it was my way of striking out at you.”

For the briefest of moments, she slipped back into the past. She’d felt isolated there as Lucifer withdrew from her daily. Unable to get past his walls, she’d in turn withdrawn from him, then punished him by denying him access to her body and their bed. But when he didn’t fight for them, didn’t demand she fulfil her wifely duties, she convinced herself he didn’t care, that he’d found another to spend his nights with, so she’d left. She’d been heartbroken and full of anger, so she’d turned to Odin, knowing that would be the ultimate betrayal, the ultimate insult. 

“I was with him only once. It felt wrong, and I knew that I could never go to him again, or anyone else for that matter.” It was a struggle to hold his gaze, to admit that she’d been wrong,
so
wrong. That as much as she blamed him,
she
had been the one to destroy their marriage. “I wanted to come back, but after you found out what I’d done, you moved on and then I knew I just couldn’t.”

“I
never
moved on, Lilith,” he said quietly, his whispered words shaking her to the core. “Yes, I took others to my bed, desperately hoping to erase your memory from my heart, from my mind, but it never worked. My heart and soul have belonged to you for as long as I can remember. And it seems no matter what I want, and what you do, it will always be that way.”

Lucifer held Lilith’s gaze, a tiny fist closing around his heart as he waited, carefully gauging her reaction to his declaration. They’d never discussed love before. Until she’d left, he assumed he had her love, and that she knew she had his. Now, it was a gamble to open himself to her, to be honest with her, but he needed to do it, needed her to know how he felt, if only to give her the courage to share her own feelings in return.

Her eyes softened and he released a breath he hadn’t realised he’d been holding, the tension cording his body flowing out of him with her next words. “I fell in love with you the night of the Festival of Anat, and have never loved anyone since. So it hurt me, really hurt me when you shut me out. I was—
am
your wife, and I couldn’t seem to get you to open up to me, and that made me feel like I just didn’t matter to you.”

The pain in her eyes nearly ripped out his heart, and he held her tighter. He’d known she was slipping away from him, but at the time he hadn’t known what to do. He’d always been a loner, the harsh reality of being the King of the Damned forcing him to detach himself from his emotions. So it had been a struggle to openly express his love for her and still remain unaffected by the darkness of Hell.

He cupped her cheek, forcing her gaze to his face. “Of course you mattered to me. You more than mattered” he whispered, his thumb absently stroking her cheek. “It’s difficult to express emotion with all this darkness around me, and until you came here, I never had a reason to. I felt you pulling away, but at the time, I just didn’t know how to love you
and
also do my duty here. You have to know you were the only thing that made my existence here meaningful. And when I lost you, I experienced an emptiness I’d never felt before.” His throat tightened when a sob fell from her lips, and he pulled her closer, hating the sound of her pain. “Forgive me for driving you away. I know why you left, and I don’t blame you for leaving, but I’ve had a lot of time to think with you gone, and I want you to know that I’ve changed, that I—”

He stopped when she placed a single finger against his lips, and his gut twisted in knots when a tear slipped down her cheek.

“Forgive you? It is me that must beg you for forgiveness, not the other way around.  I destroyed our marriage and I thought if I stayed away I could somehow numb myself to all the pain I caused us both. But then you demanded I come back, and as much as I didn’t want to face you after what I had done, I was hopeful. I never stopped loving you, Lucifer. Not once.  So I thought if I returned and we had a child together, that maybe we could somehow learn to love each other again in the process—that maybe we could start over.”

He touched his fingers to her mouth, tracing the fullness of her plump lips, and his body hardened at the thought of making a baby with her, and the image of her full and round with his child.

“I wondered why you came back. I thought it was because I forced you to. Samael said it was because you loved me.”

“Force me, Lucifer?” She snorted. “As if. You know I’m still stronger than you.” She teased, her lips crooking into a tiny grin, a glint of laughter lighting up her golden eyes. “I usually don’t agree with Samael, but this time he was right.”

He laughed at her audacious words, the sound rich and warm and completely foreign to his ears. In the blink of an eye, his laughter seemingly filled up all the empty spaces inside him, places that had been vacant from the moment she’d left.

He sobered when her smile disappeared.  “I would have returned sooner. I just didn’t think you wanted me to.”

His heart constricted at her softly spoken words. He reversed their positions, pinning her beneath him so that she would have no choice but to meet his gaze, and see what was there in his heart, his soul.  “Just so we are clear, I never wanted you to leave. Your place is here, with me—it always has been, and it always will be.”

The intensity of his words, his expression, were not lost on her, and she nodded, a still peace settling over her as her broken heart seemed to mend itself. Her place had always been right by his side, and she would never doubt that ever again.

They were older, more mature and wiser. As wrong as they’d been and the gravity of the mistakes they’d made, they’d learned to appreciate each other because of it all, to value the bond they shared. She knew that no matter how dark his despair, Lucifer would never again shut her out, and that she would never run away, never leave him  She was sure they’d stumble again, face many more obstacles along the way, but they would learn from them together, endure each trial
together.