Everything I Learned in Medical School: Besides All the Book Stuff (12 page)

Chapter 29

The Road

Meet John. John is a motivated high school student with high ambitions. He intends to get into the best college, and hopes to pick up a scholarship or two. All he has to do is dedicate all of his efforts to studying and participating in as many extra-curriculars as time will allow. He volunteers in the hospital and at the local food bank. When it comes to the SAT, he gets an early start and begins preparing when he is a freshman. All he has to do is sacrifice some fun now, and once he gets into college, he can finally relax.

Fast forward four years, and John is in college. All his hard work and weekend studying paid off. He is at one of the finest universities, and even earned himself a scholarship. He made it. But as he looks to the future, he decides that medicine is his calling. He’s heard that getting into medical school is not easy. So he hits the books hard. He frequently passes up opportunities to go out with friends to sneak in a little extra study time. As a college junior, despite his busy schedule, he manages to meet a nice young girl who he is beginning to spend more time with. But the MCAT looms over his head, and his life is put totally on hold for a few months to completely focus on this exam. He and his girlfriend drift apart due to his focus on the test. “It’s OK,” he tells himself, there will be plenty of time for girls once he makes it through the MCAT and gets into medical school.

John does in fact make it into medical school. It took eight long years of hard work and commitment. But John does not have time to sit back and smell the roses, because after medical school looms residency. He intends to pursue a residency in internal medicine at one of the top hospitals, so he knows he has to buckle down. After all, he is competing with lots of very smart people across the country. Day after day of studying seem to fly by. Some of his medical school classmates decide to take salsa lessons to get a break from the daily grind, and John is invited to join them. But there is no time, and he decides to stay focused. Later in his medical school years he has to take Step 1, a board exam that residency programs use to rank applicants. For a few months, he lives and breathes from his study guide. In fact, there are a number of pages in this book marked by patches of drool where he fell asleep studying. He thinks back to how eerily similar this feels to studying for the SAT and MCAT. No worries though, this will all soon be over once he is a resident, because he will have made it, and can finally relax.

John is now an internal medicine resident, and finally, there are no more tests to study for. But he is working 80 hours each week, spending every fourth night in the hospital on call, with little time to breathe, let alone do the fun things he thought he’d finally have time for. Worse yet, John has decided he wants to pursue a cardiology fellowship, so tries to spend the small amount of time he has outside the hospital doing research so he can write the publications that will make him a better fellowship candidate.

You can see where this is going. John the cardiology fellow now has a greater level of responsibility in the hospital, and spends a large portion of his time trying to keep up with the latest literature in his field. But alas, after another three years as a fellow, John is finally done. He is finally a cardiologist. He is 33 years old, but he can finally relax, sit back, and enjoy life, right? Hardly, because he has an endless stream of patients that he needs to see to earn his keep in his private practice. And after every few years come those pesky recertification exams that he needs to pass to remain board certified.

So you see, it never ends…never! If you are sacrificing the things you love for your job, hoping there is only one more hoop to jump through, one more exam before you can relax, you will reach a sad realization when you are middle-aged and find that much of your youth has passed you by. Thankfully, I realized this early in life, and always made sure work did not get in the way of life. So take those weekend trips with friends, find a special someone in college, keeping playing that sport you love, and by all means, dance! The destination will never be worth it if you didn’t enjoy the road.

Chapter 30

The End?

Four years soon came to an end. I found myself standing amongst my classmates, all of us garbed in our black and green graduation gowns. Our right hands were raised as we repeated the “Hippocratic Oath” in unison. This was our vow as doctors to “do no harm” and faithfully fulfill our new role. One by one, we walked across the stage, our parents beaming with pride from the audience. For the first time, we heard the new name which we would carry for the rest of our lives…

“Dr. Sujay Kansagra.”

It felt a bit unreal. I had worked so hard for this, and yet still somehow felt unworthy of this new title. It carried a new sense of responsibility, along with a new sense of pride.

It was the last day many of us would ever see each other again. We would go off to our residencies all over the country and begin to specialize in our individual fields. But for now, we all celebrated together, with a common sense of accomplishment, and a sense of unity. We knew what each of us had gone through, something no one else would quite understand. The life, the death, the laughs, the tough times… we had been through it all together, and it was finally over. Soon, we would begin the next step. Our white coats would be longer, and our name tags would carry the letters “MD”. With those two letters came a new world of expectations from others, where we could no longer hide in the comfort of, “I’m only a student.” My stomach felt an uneasiness, and there was a sense of discomfort looming in the recesses of my mind. It was an all too familiar feeling, as I thought back to the start of medical school. It was the feeling of uncertainty and apprehension, mixed with anticipation. We would soon be pushed harder than ever before, in a world where the well-being of others would hang on our decisions. But the road ahead was also one in which we would develop into the doctors we had always dreamed we would be, and fine tune our knowledge in order to care for our patients. There would be a whole new set of challenges and experiences. But then again, it would undoubtedly bring new laughs, new friends, and new lessons.

So as we all said our final goodbyes and left the campus with our families, I knew this was by no means an ending, but the start of a brand new journey.

The Beginning