Authors: Ann Mayburn
“Easy, mama bear. I don’t need you clawin’ anyone’s face off.”
That brought me out of my cold space a little bit and I shrugged. “I’m going to do what has to be done.”
Still smiling at me, he nodded, and the light caught the hints of amber in his eyes, turning the irises to the color of melted chocolate. “I know you will. But for right now, just check them out. The traitor could be acting independently of her old man as well, so if a woman seems real unhappy with her man, she might be a suspect. Or if she seems really happy with everything, that might trip your female ESP as well.”
“My female ESP?”
“Yeah, you know, that chick intuition shit. Look, we don’t have time to sit around and bullshit right now. If we did I’d still be fuckin’ you instead of talkin’. Damn woman, I can’t seem to be around you without wanting you beneath me.”
Heat rushed through me, and I squeezed my thighs together to try and stop the initial ache of arousal. “Okay.”
My voice came out in a high-pitched squeak that made him chuckle. Not knowing what the day would bring, I chose a loose, long-sleeved, pink, silky shirt with a tight, white tank top beneath that, which was also a waist holster. As I got dressed, I waited for Smoke to come molest me, but he remained on the bed and focused on whatever he was texting. A renewed sense of purpose filled me, but there was also a growing sense of loss at being away from the safety Smoke provided me. He was the only person here I trusted, and I wasn’t a big fan of being in unfamiliar environments, even if he would be there with me.
“Baby, what’cha thinkin’ so hard about?”
Before I could stop the words, I said what I was really thinking. “I don’t want to be away from you.”
He sighed and looked up, watching me as I hid a variety of weapons. The weary look left his face and a slight smile curved his lips. “Make sure you don’t go through any metal detectors.”
Strapping a sheathed throwing knife to my forearm, I glanced up and raised my eyebrows. “Ha. Ha.”
“I’ll be there, but you’ll be on your own with the women. If I hung out with you, it would be totally out of character.”
I placed my handgun into its holster on my waist before securing it in place and tugging my shirt down.
As I moved this way and that in the mirror to make sure the gun couldn’t be seen through the tank and shirt, Smoke laughed. “Does that thing have a laser sight on it?”
“Of course. Never hurts to have that little bit of extra help, but I don’t use it much. If I relied on it, I’d be a shitty shot at night.”
“Wouldn’t you worry that the laser would show them where you are?”
“Not really. When I shoot, I shoot to kill.”
“Baby, sometimes you scare me.”
“Ditto.”
Instead of being offended he smiled. “You’ll be fine. I’m not sending you into the lion’s den, just brunch with some chicks. What can I do to make this easier for you?”
“It…it would be easier for me if I had a mission goal.” As soon as those words left my mouth I bit my lower lip.
Way to remind Smoke that I’m a freak.
For a long moment he studied me and I tried to keep my face blank, betraying neither my worry nor my embarrassment, but I was pretty sure I wasn’t too successful if my burning cheeks were any indication. When he spoke, his voice was a soothing purr, and I knew he’d read me like a book. “You’ll be fine. These women are connected to their community, they know lots and lots of people, a different group of citizens than their old men have access too. I need you to hang out with them. Tell them about your mother and sister, what they’re like, and about places your mom and sister would be likely to go to. Those women have roots here, and that means they have lots of friends. They know people, and while the old ladies may not be able to go out looking for your family like my brothers can, they will have contacts that they’ll use if they like you.”
“But wouldn’t that be giving the traitor, if there is one there, information they can use against us?”
“Not really. You’re a very smart woman, Swan. You know what to say and when to shut up. I’m sure your dad trained you on hidden interrogation techniques.”
Actually, he was right. If I fell back on my training, treated this like one of my dad’s messed up tests, I could get through it. I wouldn’t approach them like a woman meeting another group of women for the first time, like one of my teenage nightmares of rejection by the cool kids coming to life. I would treat this like I was interrogating suspects. Some steel returned to my spine and I was grateful that Smoke helped me find a way to deal with this.
Now I just hoped I didn’t let him down.
I chewed on my lower lip while brushing my hair. “I don’t know how helpful I’ll be. I mean, I’m not the easiest person to get along with, and I’m not very good at schmoozing.”
By not very good I meant horrible, but Smoke just shook his head. “Don’t sell yourself short, baby girl. You’re an amazing woman, smart, funny, and loyal to the bone. You’ll be fine.”
I watched in silence as he armed himself with a gun and a couple knives along with a pair of brass knuckles and a shiny silver Zippo lighter. “What are you going to be doing?”
“None of your business,” He said it in a gentle voice, but I fucking hated those words.
“Why is it none of my business?” I gritted out through clenched teeth as I tried to keep my temper from flaring to life.
He obviously caught my tone because when he looked up while adjusting his shoulder harness his expression was guarded. “’Cause it isn’t. You let me worry about handling my end and keep yourself alive. That is your number one mission goal. Live.”
I took a deep breath and tried to calm myself down, but my anxiety level was getting higher by the moment. I could feel my inner bitch beginning to wake up as I began to go on the defensive.
“So I’m just supposed to trust that you’re off taking care of business while I sit around and chat?”
I swore a chill raced through the room as displeasure tightened his features and goosebumps broke out over my skin. “You don’t trust me?”
Uh-oh. Obviously, I had inadvertently struck a nerve. “I do trust you.”
“Then trust me when I say it’s none of your business.”
My emotions were flip-flopping between being pissed and wanting to soothe Smoke. “You do understand that’s really screwed up, don’t you? That it’s crap of the highest order? If I said that to you, I have no doubt you’d throw a huge hissy.”
“A hissy?”
The humor in his gaze made me want to smack him. “You know what I mean.”
Smoke’s phone beeped, and as he read the message, his face closed down into a cold, unreadable mask. While he typed he spoke in a tight voice, “Look, I don’t have time for your chick bullshit right now, Swan. Can’t you, just once, do what you’re fuckin’ told without riding my ass about it? Shit, I’m tryin’ my best to keep you alive, but I can’t do it if you’re gonna fight me every step of the way. If you don’t trust me, it could get us both killed. Like I don’t have enough of a clusterfuck to deal with right now.”
I stood there in hurt silence while he gathered up his shit. The part of me that needed to please the people I loved in my life wanted to apologize, but my inner bitch was having none of that. It was taking all my self-control not to pick a real fight with Smoke right now, but I had enough sense to know that this wasn’t the time or the place. However, that didn’t mean Smoke and I weren’t gonna have a conversation in the near future about what kind of shit I would and would not deal with from him. Like dismissing me as though I was a moron who couldn’t handle the truth.
I sucked in a deep breath and willed myself not to cry. Did I really want to be with a man who doubted me so much? Did I want to spend the rest of my life with someone who hid things from me? Memories of Smoke holding me like I was his lifeline, the way he looked at me, how sincere he sounded when he said he loved me battled with the fact that at times he could be a royal dick. I couldn’t help but wonder if, in a screwed up way, I loved Smoke because he could be like my father, harsh yet caring. The ramifications of that thought scared me down to my bones, and I sucked in some deep breaths while staring at my reflection in the mirror and fighting off a panic attack. I didn’t have time to freak out right now. It was an indulgence I had to ignore, because losing my shit right now could prove deadly. There was a knock on the door that startled me enough I dropped my brush on the dresser.
Before I could move, Smoke had his gun out and was standing to the side of the door. “Who is it?”
“It’s Breaker.”
Smoke holstered his gun before he opened the door and allowed the other man to stroll in. Breaker was wearing a faded Aerosmith t-shirt beneath his patched up vest and a pair of broken in jeans that flattered his lean waist. He gave me a quick once over, then turned his attention to Smoke. “You crazy kids ready to go?”
Smoke nodded, his attention back on his phone. “That tip we got earlier, any results?”
“Yeah,” Breaker’s gaze darted my way and then back to Smoke again. “We can talk about it at my house.”
The men exchanged a look that was loaded with meaning only they understood before Breaker turned his charming smile on me. “You ready to go, doll?”
“Sure.” I went to grab my helmet, but Smoke stopped me.
“You’ll be riding with Breaker in his cage.”
“My SUV,” Breaker supplied helpfully at my puzzled look.
“What? Why can’t I ride with you, Smoke?”
“Too dangerous, too exposed on my bike right now. I want you safe.”
Obviously trying to lighten the situation, Breaker smiled at me. “Don’t look so bummed out. I’ll let you control the radio.”
I shrugged, unable to form an answer for fear that I’d start crying over something as stupid as my feelings being hurt because I wouldn’t be riding behind Smoke.
My man came over and gave me a soft kiss on the forehead. “Love you, be safe.”
With that, I was left standing in the middle of the room trying to make sense of the events of the past few days, the here and now, and what was about to happen. With the way my mind worked sometimes, this was proving difficult if not impossible. I was good with straight logic, a whiz with numbers, great at calculating risks, but human beings utterly stumped me, and I hated how easily I was thrown off my stride.
Breaker ran his hand through his curly blond hair and sighed. “Girl, you gotta toughen up.”
Those words cut through my scrambled thoughts, and I stood up straighter. No one accused Mike Anderson’s daughter of not being tough. My breath hitched a bit, but I scrubbed at my face then busied myself with going through my pack. “Give me a second and I’ll be ready.”
When I grabbed my backpack with two of my dad’s homemade grenades hidden in it, Breaker raised his eyebrows. “You don’t got a purse?”
“My purse won’t carry all of what I need.”
The white lines around his eyes narrowed. “And what the fuck do you think you’ll need at my home?”
“Never hurts to be prepared.” Smoke’s words about my lack of trust began to invade my thoughts, but I pushed them back into a corner of my mind to be dealt with later. If there was a later. “The people looking for me won’t give a shit where I am. If they want me bad enough they’ll come for me, and I have to make sure I’m ready for them at all times.”
“Paranoid,” he said with a small smile. “I like it. Makes it easier to keep you alive. Don’t worry, my house is secure. You think I’d let anyone or anything near my old lady and kids?”
I tilted my head in acknowledgement. “Ready?”
We quickly made our way through the clubhouse, stopping a couple times so Breaker could introduce me to a couple different guys he called Enforcers. They treated me like I was a visiting dignitary, and soon, Breaker and I were going out the front door. I honestly had expected Smoke to be waiting for me on his bike, but only nature surrounded me as we got into Breaker’s SUV. I buckled myself in and noticed a small, plush, pink panda on the floor of the vehicle. I retrieved it and held it up to Breaker with a small smile.
“This yours?”
He chuckled while we pulled out of the lot. “Toss it in back with the girls’ other crap. I swear I clean their shit out of my cars constantly or it ends up looking like I have a fuckin’ yard sale goin’ on in my back seat.”
The rough affection in his voice made me smile. “How old are they?”
“Eight, eleven, and fifteen.” He gave a mock shudder. “All beautiful like their Mom.”
I couldn’t help but laugh, seeing shades of my father in Breaker in an odd way. “Oh, man, you’re in trouble.”
He sighed. “Don’t I know it.”
We were both quiet for the remainder of the ride, and I used that time to try to process everything that was going on or zoning out while I listened to the classic rock station Breaker had playing.
Around thirty minutes later, we pulled up to a really nice ranch house in a gated community with an amazing view of the mountains, and I blinked in surprise. This was a very pretty mega-home, perfectly landscaped, with a white Mercedes SUV in the drive along with a black Corvette, and a mini-van. Parked next to the Corvette was a motorcycle I was not familiar with, and I wondered if Smoke was already here and if that was his borrowed bike.
Breaker parked his SUV behind the white one and turned off the engine. He looked at me for a moment, studying my expression, before he said in a low voice, “Ain’t none of my fuckin’ business how my brother handles his woman, but I will say you gotta give Smoke a chance to figure things out. This shit with you is all very, very new to him and I know he’s fuckin’ crazy about you. Guy’s crazy in general, but with you, he’s a certified psycho.”
I didn’t disagree with this so I simply nodded, not sure what Breaker was getting at.
“Kid, one thing marriage has taught me is that communication is essential. You gotta listen to each other or you’re never gonna work. You make him happy in a way I’ve never seen so I want you two to work. Even if you do turn him into a madman, you’re good for Smoke, and it’s obvious to everyone that he worships you. When a man is that wrapped up in a woman, he doesn’t always think rationally, and sometimes he’ll say stupid shit, but that doesn’t mean he doesn’t love you. Just means fear is running his mouth. Plus, you two are still learning each other. I’ve been married to my woman since we were seventeen, and I feel like I hardly know her even now. Show a little kindness to the man while he figures out how not to be an asshole.”