Fall From Grace (4 page)

“Sure thing,” I said and bounced my way out of the kitchen and back into my bedroom.  I change into an oversized sweatshirt and sweat pants, ran back into the kitchen and tossed the shirt at him.  “Thanks again,” I called to him as I left the kitchen.

Lea was laying on the couch in the living room in the same exact place I left her the night before.  She had her Kindle eReader on and was probably devouring some cheesy romance novel.  I sat down next to her and sighed.  “What are you reading now?”

“Vampire romance.  It’s pretty hot, you should read it after me, and get away from reality for a while.”

I barked out a laugh.  “Nothing can make me forget my reality,” I answered flatly.

Looking up Lea asked, “Why do you have an aversion to reading all of a sudden?”

“Why bother?  There’s no book; fictional, horror, fairytale, anything that could come even close to the warped disturbing reality of my horrible existence,” I shuttered.

“Gray,” she leaned forward and hugged me.  “Why don’t you just try to live a little?  Do what makes you smile.  Stop looking for things that aren’t here.  Just enjoy the things that are here.”

If only it were that easy.  I leaned back and smiled at my friend.  In a blink of an eye, this life would be over.

Conner and Shane strolled in and stopped abruptly, feeling the seriousness of our conversation.  I stood up and without a word walked back down the hallway and into the kitchen to reclaim the coffee I had left there.  I needed to escape before anyone saw me cry.

“Everything okay?” I heard Conner ask.

Shane chuckled.  “Did I piss her off?  Shit, I didn’t make her cry or anything, did I?  She just asked if I wanted my shirt back.  I thought I’d get to look at her half naked again!”

I heard Lea stomp off the couch.  “Shane, you are the biggest egotistical self-centered man I have ever met.  If you think for one minute, someone like Grace would spend more than a minute with you on her mind, you’re more than stupid.”  Her voice got louder.  “Her brother died yesterday.  Ass hat!”

She stormed through the hallway.  The sound of the bathroom door slamming shook the walls.

Within two seconds, Conner’s voice was murmuring to her though the locked door.  I leaned my hands on the kitchen countertop letting the cool granite calm me.

The floor creaked softly behind me.  Shane leaned against the counter next to me.  He was so close that I felt his breath on my temple.  It took all the control I possessed in my body not to scream at him to get away from me.  “I’m sorry...Grace, I didn’t mean to be a smart ass.  I didn’t know about your brother. I didn’t mean to...”

I shook my head and sighed.  I didn’t even turn to look at him.

“I’m being serious, Grace. I know how much it sucks to lose someone you care about.”  I felt him lean in closer and it made me dizzy.  “Look at me.”

I met his eyes with mine, and then his gaze traveled down to my lips.  Of all the male egotistical, crappiest things to do, he was trying to use my grief to get me to kiss him!  I swear, if he leans in and tries to kiss me, I’ll bite his lip right off!

His eyes lifted back up to meet mine.  He had to have seen the disgusted expression on my face. “It is what it is.  You said nothing that affected me Shane.  Thanks for the condolences for my brother.  And, do yourself a favor, don’t bother trying to mess with my head, it’ll be a waste of your time.  I won’t sleep with you.  Just treat me like one of the guys and we’ll get along fine and then you won’t have to stand over me in a kitchen pretending you give a shit about anyone other than yourself.”

He blinked and hesitated for what seemed like an eternity.  Then a devilish smile crept across his face, “Who said I wanted to sleep with you?  You’re just one of the guys.  I don’t do guys.”

I burst into laughter and matched his smile.  Leave it to an egotistical man to make a joke about it.

He slid his hands off the countertop and dropped them to his sides.  His smile lingered for just a moment and he backed away.  “Although, I have to admit.  You are the sexist guy I’ve ever met.”

The totally goofy grin that was plastered on his face right before he walked out of the kitchen made being mad at him almost impossible.  Almost.

After a few minutes, the four of us converged back into the living room and hung   ourselves over the furniture.  For some odd reason, Shane and I found ourselves sitting next to each other on the couch.  Lea was cuddled on Conner’s lap in one of the chairs, and she was spastically flipping through the channels on the television.  Shane was continuously texting someone, or a bunch of someones, and smiling like an ass.

Every so often, he’d read a message from off is phone and brush his arm against me and laugh.  I forced myself to ignore him, but he still hadn’t put his shirt on and the closeness of him made me want to reach out and feel his skin.  He really was ridiculously beautiful.  Too bad, he wasn’t much more then eye candy.

Another twenty minutes was all I could stand.  I jumped up, grabbed my sneakers, and put them on.

Lea sat up.  “Where are you going?  We were going to go to the bar again tonight around ten.”  She gave a nod towards Shane.  “His band is playing another gig there.  Want to hang out again? I’ll let you get drunk this time and hold your hair back,” she pleaded.

I tightened my laces and stood up.  “I’m getting antsy.  I thought I’d go for a run.”

Shane put his phone on the table and watched me.

“Well, what about hanging with me tonight?  We haven’t seen each other in six months, I missed you!” Lea whined.

“I don’t know.  I’ll see how I feel after my run.  If you’re not here when I get back, I’ll text you.”  I hurried out of the room and out of the front door.  I just needed to be outside.

The minute I turned around to stretch my legs against my front steps, Shane was standing right next to me.  I rolled my eyes and ignored him.  That is until he started stretching alongside me.  “What are you doing?” I asked.

“I thought I’d run with you,” he said laughing a little.  “I figured you wouldn’t care; you know, since you’re just one of the guys, and this is what I do with the guys.  Unless you don’t think you could handle it.”

Mentally flipping him the bird I smiled sweetly, “I’ll try my best.”  I took off running along the street and headed towards Fifth Avenue; hooked a right and sped passed the Metropolitan Museum of Art.  It had been a little over six months, but I could do this run in my sleep.  Even at the hospice, I ran at least ten miles a day at the gym, just to separate myself from what was happening.  I took up running after my accident when they taught me how to walk again in rehab and I never stopped.  Running is as natural to me as breathing now.

Once in Central Park, I started on the Reservoir Loop around the Jacqueline Kennedy Onassis Reservoir.  Shane kept pace with me silently.  The only sound I focused on was my feet hitting the soft cinder pathway.  My eyes stayed focused ahead of me, never once acknowledging Shane next to me.

The Jackie O Loop is about 1.5 miles long, and as soon I completed it, I started on one of the full loops through Central Park along the East side.  I vaguely remembered each loop being about five miles long.  I ran them twice.  I think I hit my runner’s high twice; it was pure bliss.  Starting the second loop, my mind took over; my soul pushing me forward as it always does, my body just a machine.

Shane kept pace still.  I decided that he wasn’t human.

I ran through the 86th Street Transverse, out onto Fifth Ave, and slowed my pace.  I continued to slow until I was cooled down and walking; breathing evenly.  I walked towards my apartment steps, only then noticing night had fallen and the temperature had dropped to around 35 degrees.  I stretched my legs against my steps; still remaining silent.

I guessed Shane was somewhere behind me doing the same thing.  I didn’t care to look at him until he cleared his throat, seemingly to get my attention.

I spun around to face him.  He stood in the middle of the sidewalk glaring at me in what looked like disbelief.

“You’re a runner, huh?”

I made a stupid face at him.  “I said I was going for a run.  You assumed that I wasn’t man enough?” I snapped.

Shane shook his head at me and gave me an amused expression.  “Not many people surprise me, Grace, but you just surprised the shit outta me.”

Ignoring his statement, I got out my key and unlocked the front door.

I heard him sigh behind me.  “Did my heart love till now? Forswear it sight, for I ne'er saw true beauty ‘til this night,” he murmured.

My hand released its grip from the doorknob and I looked back at him.  One arm rested on the railing of the stairs, the other lay over his heart.

“Shakespeare,” I whispered.

He nodded a sad smile at me and turned to walk away.

I opened the front door and stepped halfway inside.

“Hey, you coming to the bar tonight?” he called out after me.

I stopped and turned around, “Maybe, I don’t know. I have to see how I feel after a shower.”

A smile burst onto his face, making him more stunning than it was humanly possible.  “Do you need help with that?  I’d like to see how you feel after a shower too...”

I slammed the door on him, but I couldn’t help smiling.  Crap.

Less than an hour later, I was dressed in a pair of jeans, an off the shoulder sweater that Lea forced me to put on, and a pair of knee high leather boots that I had forgotten I bought last winter.

I was then locked in the bathroom and again forced to endure a complete hair and face make-over from Lea, who decided it would be her mission to get me to look, as she so eloquently put, doable.

My jet-black hair looked bouncy and wild, and she did the makeup around my eyes to make them look smoky and sexy.  Oh dear God, even I wanted to take me home!  She wasn’t going to stop until I went out on a date with someone.

This wasn’t the first time she did this either, it was probably more like the fifth.  Each time, I ended up going out with some guy who was nice, but who just wasn’t for me.  I hated this game.

“Lea, I don’t want to try to impress anyone, this isn’t me,” I said.

She rolled her eyes so expressively I thought they were going to pop out of her head.  “Gray, I could cover your face in shit and make you wear tampons as earrings and you still would be the hottest girl in the bar.  Besides me, of course.”

“So why am I getting all dressed up.  Where’s the shit and tampons?”

She slapped me across the shoulder playfully.  “Look, I just think you need to feel a little sexy and try to live a little, that’s all.”  She sat down on the edge of the bathtub and a serious expression crossed her face.  “Gray, all you got is me now.  I just want you to have fun.  Make this life the best you ever had.  And, you know who was asking a ton of questions about you?”

I pretended to care, “Hmm...who?”

“Tucker.  He’s gorgeous, isn’t he?”

“Sure.  Come on.  Let’s go have some fun.”  I said pulling her out of the bathroom.

When we walked into the bar, the guys were already there.  Tucker and Conner sat with their backs to the empty stage and waved at us.  Shane was sitting on the right of them in between the longhaired drummer and bass player of his band.  Leaning against his chair with a beer in one hand and his guitar in the other, he looked relaxed.  I hoped that he was utterly exhausted from the run; it would serve him right.

Tucker stood up when we got to the table and gave me a broad smile.  It made me want to throw up, and I didn’t even understand why.  Conner grabbed our coats and put them on the back of various chairs.

“Grace, you didn’t get to meet the rest of the guys last night.  Of course, you know Tucker and Conner,” Lea said, sounding oh-so-dorky.  “This is Ethan, the drummer,” she pointed to an extremely blond guy who looked to be the size of two NFL football players.  He saluted me with a drumstick.  “And, this is Brayden, the bass player, and you know Shane already.”  Brayden nodded at Shane and me. Well, Shane just stared at me saying nothing.  I chuckled inside; the run must have gotten to him!

The last band member, who was introduced as Alex, showed up with a huge bucket of ice-cold beers for everyone.

Lea grabbed me by the hand and shoved me into the seat next to Tucker, who promptly handed me a beer.  I tried to twist my face into a smile. This was going to be a long night.

Tucker leaned closer to me and whispered into my ear, “You look incredible.”

I leaned back and smiled.  “Thank you.”  He was sweet.  Very attractive too, just, well, I guess I’d give him a chance.  A small one.  I looked up to see Shane watching me.  He didn’t take his eyes off of me until the drummer, Ethan, hit him on the head with one of his drumsticks to let him know they needed to be on stage.  Shane was definitely not used to a girl saying no to him.  He looked pissed at me.  Oh well.

“What the hell was that look?” Lea asked when Shane got up to leave.  He had to have heard her, but he didn’t acknowledge the question.

Tucker leaned in smiling, “Well, take a look at her, she’s beautiful.  Of course, Shane is going to look at her!”

I shook my head.  “No.  I think he’s pissed at me.  I sort of told him off this afternoon and then he challenged me to a run.”