Fall (Romanian Mob Chronicles Book 2) (9 page)

E
sther

T
his had to be a dream
. The most awful nightmare I ever could have conjured up. It all felt surreal, the man who’d taken me from my home moaning as his life slowly seeped out of him. The kid who’d tried to rob me ghost white, probably more in shock than I’d been. The other man calm, adjusting his tie as he stood. Natasha on the ground, writhing in pain.

And Sorin standing above her, looking for all the world like this was nothing.

I flinched, waited for the gun to go off, knowing my life had changed irreparably, wondering how much more it would after this was done.

“Mr. Petran,” the man said finally.

Sorin kept his eyes on Natasha and then looked over to him.

“On behalf of Clan Constantin, I extend my sincerest apologies. Christoph would be deeply grateful if you’d allow us to deal with Petey in house. We’d also like to take care of Ms. Florescu if you wouldn’t mind.”

I glanced at Natasha, and for the first time, I could see fear in her face.

Sorin lowered the gun and handed it to the other man.

“It would be my pleasure,” he said.

Natasha’s eyes widened. “No, Sorin! You can’t give me to them. You know what they’ll do to me,” she cried on a high-pitched wail.

“Anton, please tell Christoph I’ll be in touch,” Sorin said, completely ignoring Natasha.

Anton gestured toward Natasha and the kid snapped out of his stupor and ran to her, hoisting her over his shoulder. Anton did the same with Petey, seemingly unbothered by the blood that gushed from him.

And then they were gone, and Sorin and I were alone.

S
orin

I
went over to her
, pulled her into my arms and held her tight, pretended that she wasn’t stiff, wasn’t pulling away. She didn’t say anything, so I let her go, stared down at her. A shiver racked her frame and she looked as vulnerable and scared as I’d ever seen her.

I pulled her to me again, squeezed her tight, touching every inch of her I could reach, trying to believe that she was real.

Alive.

I cupped her face in my hands, rubbed my thumbs along her cheekbones, then leaned forward and pressed a soft kiss against her forehead. Her gaze didn’t waver from mine, but I didn’t see the playfulness, affection, even the anger that had so often lit it.

I saw shock, fear, neither of which surprised me but both of which terrified me, made the almost countless times that my own life had been at stake seem like nothing.

I lifted her from the ground, telling myself that she wrapped her arm around my shoulders because she wanted to and not simply for stability, and carried her out into an empty car that Anton had left for me.

And as we drove, she didn’t say a word, didn’t cry or scream or even insult me for what had happened. No, she was completely gone from me, completely absent. I prayed I would get her back.

E
sther

O
nly when I
realized I had no clue where we were going did some of the fog that had ensnared me dissipate.

“Where are we going, Sorin?”

“I’m taking you home,” he said.

“You don’t have to do that. I can…” I trailed off, the terror I thought I had choked down rushing back up.

The adrenaline had faded but left a shaky unsteadiness that made me nauseous, and I didn’t think I could handle forming a coherent thought, though it didn’t stop me from wondering what I would do if I were alone.

He reached over and grabbed my hand as if he could sense the direction of my thoughts.

“I’m here with you. Nothing will happen to you.”

“Sorin, I don’t think—”

“Don’t think. Just get warm and relax. I’ll have you home soon, and you’ll be safe there.”

I should’ve argued. Part of me wanted to argue, but instead I tucked my feet under my thighs and waited, holding tight to Sorin’s hand.

I perked when he turned down a quiet street. It was filled with rows of manicured lawns, the houses far enough apart to give at least an illusion of privacy. So different from my own somewhat cramped and definitely not as affluent neighborhood. I wondered why we were here, but stayed silent, content, at least for the moment, to follow him.

He led me up a tidy front porch and opened the door. I entered behind him and looked around quickly. Dark hardwoods ran across all the floors I could see. To the left was a small dining room, and beyond that a huge kitchen that made me almost as jealous as Fawn and Vasile’s did.

Hand still intertwined with mine, Sorin locked the door and then pulled me forward and down a hall. We passed through the living room and I tried to take it all in at once, but when my gaze landed on the mantel, I stopped cold, somewhat unbelieving of what I saw. I released his hand and walked closer, my eyes glued to the mantel.

There was a picture of Sorin holding baby Maria. She was tiny in his arms, tubes running out of her body, but he smiled bright, looked so proud.

That picture made my heart tremble, but the effect was little compared to the feeling that rushed over me when I stared at the picture next to it.

It was me at Fawn and Vasile’s as best I could tell, my lips curved in my standard expression of disbelief. I drifted even closer, not even stopping when I thought about my dirty feet on his pristine floors. I walked until I was in front of the mantel, traced a finger over the picture of him and Maria and then reached for the picture of me before I dropped my hand and turned to him.

He’d followed behind me, and stood close enough to touch me, though he didn’t.

“You live here?” I said.

His lips curved, his eyes slightly sparked with humor.

“That was a dumb question,” I said.

“Not what you expected?”

“I figured you lived in a strip club,” I said, feeling almost like myself.

He laughed lightly, grabbed my hand again.

“Come now, Esther. You know I’d make the strippers come to me.”

“You’re right. Silly of me. But it’s been a tough night.”

I regretted the words as soon as they were out; instantly all humor faded.

He tucked his forearm against mine, pulled me until I was trapped against his side, and then started to walk down the hall and out of the living room. I hadn’t even asked him about the picture of me. About why it was in his home. But it didn’t feel right to now.

We entered the room at the end of the hall, and through the ever-brightening morning light, I could see that it was masculine, not decorated, exactly, but not what I had imagined Sorin’s bedroom would look like.

I halfway wondered if I’d even ever imagined it. It seemed so mundane, a bedroom, a house. Sorin and those things, real life, were incompatible. At least in my mind, he had existed in a space divorced from that, lived in a world completely distinct from mine and from any that I could understand. My shoulders slumped.

Last night had proven that true, but not in the mystical, magical way I’d imaged. No, that had been dark, made me again question my capacity to be a part of Sorin’s world.

He led us into a huge bathroom, and let my hands go long enough to turn the water on full blast.

He undressed quickly and I watched the ink that marked his skin as it danced with his motion. And then he came toward me, proceeded to pull the work shirt off me, followed by my heavy work pants. And then he turned and led me into the shower, his broad back as decorated as his chest had been.

I didn’t understand this, what was happening, my words had left me, so I stood.

He touched me gingerly, used his warm, strong hands to wet every inch of my skin.

I met his eyes, his hair water-darkened, his lashes weighted by droplets, his eyes completely unreadable.

And then I was pressed against his chest, his arms tight around my shoulders, soft stomach against his hard abs, lean thighs against mine.

And he said nothing, just held me until the water turned cold.

S
orin

“
Y
ou can wear
this until you get home,” I said as I handed her some of my workout clothes.

She nodded and sat up, the covers falling away from her breasts. She quickly moved to tuck the sheet under her arms, and in that moment I knew I had lost her.

She hadn’t looked at me, not that I could blame her, but her covering herself was more telling than almost anything else. Never, not ever, had Esther been shy. Her lifting the covers, the haunted look in her eyes, told me all that I needed to know.

How many times had I imagined it, bringing Esther here, watching her surprise when she saw the place and then critiqued it, imagined letting her into my life.

I cursed Petey, Natasha, but most of all I cursed myself. I had known this would happen, and if it hadn’t been them, it would have been someone else. I’d thought I could handle it, had counseled my brother once that he could do the same, but seeing her in danger, knowing how close she had been to her end, had changed everything.

I couldn’t take it, couldn’t risk it. I would rather cut out my own heart instead.

“Are you ready?”

The words came out harsh, uncaring, and I saw her frown. She smoothed it away quickly, and then nodded. Less than ten minutes later, we were off.

It took everything I had inside me to keep from touching her again. But I didn’t, deciding that I needed to practice staying away, so I watched her from the corner of my eye, trying to memorize every contour of her face, every emotion that crossed, thinking it would have to see me through my days.

She stepped out of the car and walked toward her door on overly large flip-flops.

She looked at me questioningly when she stopped in front of the solid steel door I had had installed this morning while she slept.

I handed her the key. “This should keep anyone out. And I’ll have someone watching the house,” I said as she unlocked it.

“That’s not necessary,” she said, her hand on the knob.

“Can you say that after yesterday, Esther?”

She blanched, whether at the harshness of my words or the truth of them I couldn’t tell. But as she always did, my beautiful, brazen Esther bounced back, squared her shoulders and then stepped across the threshold. She looked back at me again, face expectant. I shook my head. “I won’t be coming in.”

I couldn’t, couldn’t risk not being able to leave.

“Ever?” she asked, the word quiet.

“Ever,” I said with a certainty I didn’t feel. I saw her hand flex and tighten on the knob, and then she met my eyes. My heart soared, excited at the prospect of her protesting, while my brain screamed that she shouldn’t, begged her not to test my weak resolve.

“Good-bye, Sorin,” she said.

She closed the door.

E
sther

A
fter I closed
the new door, I leaned against it, the sturdy steel, the reinforced doorjamb, seeming like something that belonged in another world, and not my grandmother’s house.

The door was strong, secure, and an unbearably painful reminder. Shut me away from my life as I had known it completely. Shut me away from Sorin completely.

And so I was left, not the Esther I had been before him, not the one that I had allowed myself to hope I might be with him.

No, I was something else, and I hadn’t yet figured out what.

I glanced at the clock that faced the front door. It was the same one that had hung there for decades, each hour a different bird species. I still wasn’t sure why we even had it. My grandmother hadn’t liked birds. My brother and I hadn’t either. But looking at it gave me some measure of comfort. Minor, but I’d take what I could get.

And that stupid clock told me that I still had forty-five minutes before my shift.

Remarkable really, given I had been seconds away from death. In the years before, I’d call in for a hangnail, quit for even less, but as I stood in the painful silence of the foyer, my mind not yet comprehending what had happened, what would happen now, I decided to go to work.

S
orin

“
H
ow is she
?” Vasile said after I entered Familie.

“She’s fine,” I said.

He narrowed his eyes at me, tilted his head slightly, and I prepared for the combating lecture.

“You left her?”

“I did. Someone’s watching the house,” I said, my voice flat, hoping he’d let the matter drop.

“And you’re okay with that?”

No such luck. “Vasile, you’re worried about my personal affairs when there is business to attend.”

“Anton is on his way, so we have time to talk.”

“Fine. Fuck it. You were right, brother. There is no place for them in our world. I can’t risk it…”

I glanced up at him, waiting for him to talk me out of what I was saying, but instead he said, “There isn’t. Not if you don’t make one.”

His words rattled in my brain, stirring shocked disbelief and hope so strong that it almost stole my breath. I ignored it though and focused on the disbelief. “How can I…?” I finally said.

“You can. I worry over them every moment of every day. But my life with out her, without that baby, it was no life. I think you feel the same about Esther,” he said.

“Anton is here,” Nicki called out, and as I watched him come into the back room, I put thoughts of Esther aside.

“Vasile, Sorin, on behalf of Clan Constantin, I apologize for last night’s…unpleasantness. Please be assured that all who were involved are being handled.”

“Appropriately I assume?” Vasile said.

“Appropriately and severely.”

“And?” Vasile said.

“Clan Constantin will make appropriate remuneration for the breach.”

“And is this coming from Christoph?” I asked.

His expression didn’t change. “Yes. He asked me to give you his assurances.”

“The kid? Do you have him?” I asked.

“Yes.”

“I’d like to handle him personally,” I said, determined to fulfill the vow I’d made when I saw him standing in Esther’s house and suddenly very excited about the prospect of doing so.

Anton nodded. “As you wish.”

He paused, clearly wishing to say something.

“What else, Anton?” Vasile said.

“Ms. Florescu?” he said.

“She will be missed,” Vasile replied.

“Very well. Sorin, drop by at any time. He will be waiting.”

“Good-bye, Anton,” Vasile said.

Recognizing he had been dismissed, Anton turned and left. And when we were alone again, I looked at Vasile, my blood starting to boil.

“I want to kill him,” I said.

“I understand. You will soon enough. And we don’t have to accept this. Christoph is responsible for what his clan does. We’d be well within our rights to escalate the matter.”

I knew what escalate meant, knew that it would give me a change to sate the bloodlust that simmered beneath the loss. I would have some measure of vengeance but knew more death would accomplish nothing. I wouldn’t have known that months ago, wouldn’t have cared. It was yet another way Esther had changed me.

“That won’t be necessary,” I said.

Vasile nodded and I could see pride in the movement and in the slight upturn of his lips. I knew he’d always worried about me and about whether I would ever grow up. I was happy that I’d given him the reason I had.

“Too bad about Anton,” he said a moment later. “He would do Constanin well.”

“We could recruit him,” I said, though my thoughts were still preoccupied with Esther, missing her.

Vasile shook his head. “He’s loyal. A rare quality. He won’t leave them, probably thinks he owes them everything. But enough about Clan Constantin. You say this to me all the time, and I never thought I’d get to say it to you.”

I raised my head. “What?”

“You look like you need a drink.”