Fallen (21 page)

“
Inhale
, Magdalene,” he coaxed, softly.

I
finally
allowed my lungs to open, enjoying the cool, refreshing feeling as they filled up. Still, our eyes were locked
,
and I
nearly
shook
with
the
thrill of having him so close
. S
urprisingly, I was able to
contain
it.

He watched me curiously, unmoving, as I
collect
ed
myself.

“How-
h
ow did you get in here?” I asked
,
finally able to formulate words.

“Weren’t you interest
ed in seeing me?” he responded
, being
only
slightly troubled.

I was uncomfortable
with the fact
that he called me out
,
but denying it would do no good. It was obvious to me now – though I had no idea
how I
achieve
d
it – that he
had come
because of me.

“How did you get in here?” I repeated, feeling stupid.

“You have a trellis up the side of your house.”

“I do?”

He nodded.

“Oh.”

“You don’t look like you’re in mortal danger so did you need something else specifically?” He
lifted his eyebrows, insinuating.

I hesitated,
un
certain
of wanting
to go through with the line of questioning I
brainstormed
.
But I knew
,
now was the time to ask them
,
or I may never have another chance.
Given
Eran’s unpredictability
,
there was no telling when he would show back up.

“How did you know I wanted to speak with you?” I demanded
,
quietly.

“Ah, that
…
,
” He took a step back, leaning against the dresser Rufus
gave
me so I
’d
stop
hogging the bathroom. His hands curled around its edges
,
allowing his muscles to expand
across
his shoulders and chest
, straining
against the
thin,
black sweater he
was wearing.
I was momentarily distracted.

Regaining my composure, I asked, “Are you going to answer me?”

“I wasn’t sure how.”

“The truth always helps,” I suggested.

“No…that’s not what I mean…” He seemed to struggle for the words to explain. “I’m
…I’m
not sure how I do it.”

It was clear h
e
was
as frust
rated
as me
. I gave him time, glancing around my room and noting
that
I hadn’t picked up a single stitch of clothing in what looked to be a week. I made a movement to begin
straightening up
,
and make my room presentable
,
when he began to speak.

“Typically, I don’t feel you. Most of the time there is…nothing. Then, something happens.
It’s e
ither a slow build up or…or
an intensely
quick
response
,
but
suddenly I’m overwhelmed with a feeling that I can only attribute to the sensation of
panic
.”

Oddly, I
was able to discern
that
he just uncannily described every instance of fear
that I was beginning
to sense these last few days.
I nodded, asking him to go on, and waited.

His eyes dropped to the floor
,
flitt
ing
back and forth
,
as if they would
reveal
some understanding of what he experienced
.

“Then I have an uncontrollable need to find you, to protect you.
” His eyes
were
usually so certain
,
but
now
,
so confused
,
rising back up to meet mine.
In a rush of words,
making
me think he was slightly embarrassed to
announce
them, he
declared
, “I can think of nothing else then until I see that you are safe.”

“But you came tonight…even though I wasn’t
fearful, or
in any danger
.
”

“Right, I did,” h
e
said
, still perplexed. “Tonight was different. I…
I felt a…
yearning. From you.”

The realization of those words spread through me like hot liquid, and
now,
i
t was my eyes that dropped to the floor,
avoiding
his. I could feel the heat creep up over my cheeks and
across
my forehead
.
I had
never been more mortified in
all
my life.

“It’s nothing to be ashamed of,” he
assured
me, though I detected humor beneath his words.

Yet
, it
was
something to be ashamed of
. He had no
control
over
the feelings that pestered
him
when it
pertained to
dealing with me – he’d just made that clear - whereas
I did
have control
.
I had no excuse.

I realized he was waiting patiently for
my reply
, watching me with
his
intense
blue-green
eyes.

“I have
more
questions,” I whispered, my head still down, wishing the flush would fade
faster
.

He stepped forward, tucking his finger under my chin and gently lifting it so I was forced to look up.
A shock ran through
my body
when he touched me
and
intensified
when our eyes met
.
“
I don’t think any less of you for asking me to come here.”
He exuded a tenderness
that made his words unquestionably sincere.

I gave him an awkward smile,
intended to be
an unspoken thanks for pacifying my ego.
He really could be
chivalrous
,
when he put forth the effort.

But then
,
he
dropped his hand and stepped back against the dresser again, adding playfully, “It’s really not your fault. You can’t help yourself when it comes to me.”

I sneer
ed at him
,
but still
laughed.
“Funny
…
.
”

“Not really. I rather enjoy it.”

I couldn’t be certain
,
whether he meant what he said or
he
was still teasing
,
but
I
decided it was safer to change the subject anyways.

“I did call you here for a reason
…
.
”

“
Yes, y
ou said you have questions.”
A smile played on his lips.
“Shoot.”

I sat up on the foot of the bed before beginning
. I
needed
to see his reactions
,
and that position gave me a better vantage point.
My flushing was
finally starting to
diminish
,
thankfully.

“You’re not from around here, are you?” I asked, starting with an easy one.

“
I’m close enough
.”

“Where?”

“Close enough.” There was no arrogant grin accompanying what appeared to be teasing banter. Instead, his face was firmly set
,
undeter
red
.

I sighed. “You agreed to answer my questions.”

“I did and I will. But you’ll need to allow me to do it on my own terms.”

“Is that the new agreement?”

“It is.”

I rolled my eyes. “Alright then
…
under the new agreement, will you explain to me why y
ou only appear when I’m in danger
?”

“
Well
…
,
” He chuckled to himself. “The simplest answer is
,
you
need saving
.”

I sighed
in frustration at
his
perception
, muttering,
“What I mean is
,
why don’t I ever see you any other time? You don’t live in this neighborhood, I’ve checked.”