Fallen Tears: A Blood Crave Novella (Blood Crave Series) (7 page)

“What do you think is happening downstairs?”

Remy quieted down as he looked back toward the door, wishing he had the power to hear the conversation he knew for sure was going on, like any vampire would.

“I haven’t a clue.”

CHAPTER 8

Rowan grasped the bottle filled with blood as she gulped it down hungrily, her body instantly feeling stronger. She knew it was Kaji’s blood flowing through her veins and that thought alone made her happier. Finished, she set the empty bottle on the table beside her as she looked over at Kaji, who stood at the foot of the bed.

He looked afraid of her.

“Why don’t you come closer?” she said, staring openly up at him. Her voice was stronger from the blood while her lips were stained dark by it. Although technically dead, in that moment she felt more alive than ever. She tentatively brought her fingers to the sharp points that she felt in her mouth.

It was something she had to get used to.

“I think it’s best if I stay here.” He didn’t move from his position, just stared at her guardedly.

Rowan was confused by his behavior so she asked, “Why?”

She licked her lips slowly, getting the last remnants of his blood as she gazed up at him, almost drunkenly. It tasted
so
good. Even though she was having a conversation with Kaji, she couldn’t get the thought of sinking her teeth into his pale neck.

It tempted her.

“Rowan—”

“Are you really that mad that you changed me?” She cut him off as she sat up higher on the bed and looked at him in earnest. She shook her head to get her current thoughts out of her mind.

If Kaji knew what she had been thinking …

…
Although he can’t anymore. Even if he wanted to.

“Please don’t worry about that, Kaji. I’ve always wanted this. It’s just not the way I expected. Anyway, now we can be together forever.” She looked up at him hopefully, smiling as she tried to lighten the mood.

“That’s not possible, Rowan.” Kaji gave his head a small shake as he looked away from her.

“Why?” Her voice cracked on the word as the expression on her face changed to one of worry. She thought back to the words she had heard earlier from the lapsus. “Why are you leaving me?” She stared back at him in disbelief as tears involuntarily rolled down her face.

She really hated crying but it seemed like it was all she was doing lately.

Kaji’s eyes flickered over to her tear-filled eyes. Even though she was now lamia, her tears weren’t made from blood like his were.

The only difference between new and old vampires.

“I never wanted to make you cry. I love you, Rowan. That’s why I’m leaving.” He said it so matter of factly as Rowan gazed up at him, shocked.

“You love me?” she scoffed, mirroring his words. Covering her tear-streaked face with her hands, she shook her head. “I didn’t even know you could feel that emotion. Do you know how long I’ve waited for you to say that to me?”

Tears streamed down her face like an open faucet as she looked up at him again. “I think I’ve loved you since I first met you. When you saved me from my life and all the pain I was feeling.” She shrugged unapologetically. “Only now I’ve realized it.”

He said nothing.

“So that’s your logic for leaving?” She frowned up at him as she spoke. “Because you love me so much?” She couldn’t remove the tinge of sarcasm from her voice.

Kaji blinked slowly, a frown forming on his face. “Do you remember what you told me? About what happened with that lapsus?”

Rowan stayed silent, remembering. “Yes, but—”

He cut her off abruptly. “Had he not known you were associated with a lamia, he wouldn’t have hurt you.”

She shook her head firmly. “You don’t know that.”

“Well he probably wouldn’t have stabbed you in the stomach—” Kaji paused at the memory, then went on, “—or implanted that thought of you fearing the dark. You’re irrationally afraid, now.”

Rowan’s mind flashed back to the dark alleyway and the man with the glowing eyes and she gave a shiver, frowning stubbornly. “I’ll get over it.”

“No, I don’t think you will. And I can’t help you with that. You being with me is dangerous—I should have figured that out by now. Everyone close to me dies. It was my fault for bringing you into this life. There are people who will harm you if they know you’re with me, no matter whether you’re human or lamia. I thought they had stopped looking but I guess I was wrong.”

“Kaji—”

He walked nearer and knelt by the bed. He cradled her face in his hands as she looked over at him. His eyes looked so sad, causing a pang in Rowan’s heart. “You really did keep your promise and teach me how to be human. You know that, right?”

“And you’re breaking yours.”
You’re supposed to protect me.

He gave a small smile, unable to hear what she was thinking. He would never be able to read her mind, now that Rowan was lamia.

She now desperately wished he could.

“It’s time for me to return to my reality, Rowan. You’ll be safer. These people here, the lapsus, will do what I couldn’t. And I’ll do whatever it takes to keep you safe.” He stroked the side of her face with the pad of his thumb. It brushed over her lower lip as Rowan inhaled sharply at the sensation. “You taught me how to be human but I can’t be here to show you how to be lamia.”

Kaji rested his forehead against her own, his hair covering them both like a cloak. “For that, I’m sorry.”

Rowan still couldn’t say anything as she struggled to breathe, feeling almost frantic. He lifted his head from hers and stared back at her with his intense black eyes, silent. He drew nearer as he brought his lips to her forehead, kissing her lightly. She sat motionless as she closed her eyes, memorizing the feeling.

It was the first time he kissed her.

He slowly withdrew as he stood up and looked down at her one final time. She kept her eyes closed as she brought her fingers to her furrowed forehead.

“Your actions and words aren’t making any sense, Kaji.” She slammed her hand against the bed and opened her eyes, giving him a killer glare that made her look extremely lethal, especially when she bared her fangs. She clenched her teeth together as she continued, “If you leave, I’ll hate you forever.”

He gave a pained expression, then nodded.

“I mean it,” she said, eyes pleading as she looked up at him.

Kaji said nothing, just closed his eyes briefly. Opening them once more, he moved his arm only to pat her on the head one last time. He then turned and walked away as he ascended the stairs, leaving Rowan utterly alone, the flame in the lamp still burning bright.

The only trace of him ever being there was the tingling she still felt on her forehead from his lips.

CHAPTER 9

Remy slowly walked down the staircase, his legs feeling heavy with the descent. He found Rowan lying in the bed on her side, the lamp still lit with the flame he had created earlier. She appeared asleep, a cover thrown over her, but he knew she was still awake. He thought back to his own farewell with Kaji.

“Take care of her for me.”

“What is it you’re asking, Kaji?”

“Exactly that. Make sure she stays safe, witch.”

Remy now stood standing by the bed, waiting for her to uncover the sheet that she was enveloped under. He saw her body shift as she hastily pulled the sheet away, instantly locking eyes with him. She was wearing one of his sister’s brightly colored T-shirts, something he found didn’t suit Rowan at all. Her hair was in disarray around her face, a mixture between straight locks and curly tendrils. Eyes red, he knew she had been crying. But there was a passion in them he hadn’t seen before.

This must be the real Rowan, filled with fire and spirit.

Remy didn’t know what to say to her so he said the first thing that popped into his head.

“I’m sorry that your anchor left.”

“My anchor?” She stared up at him blankly.

He shrugged awkwardly, not looking her in the eyes. He focused instead at the space between her eyebrows. “We all have anchors, someone to keep us rooted. For me, it’s my family. Kaji was your family, right?”

She said nothing.

He walked closer to the bed and crouched down low, finally having enough courage to look directly into her deep brown eyes. They were beautiful despite the doubt looming in its depths. “I know you feel like you have no one right now. And I know you’ve just met me. But if you like, you have me.”

She didn’t know what to do with his words, just looked at him like he was out of his mind.

He laughed at her expression, scratching the top of his head at his forwardness. “And Sage and Faith, of course,” he added, licking his dry lips.

“But I’m defective.”

He lost the smile on his face, slightly thrown at the change in topic and the seriousness in her voice. “What?” Remy didn’t understand where she was coming from.

Rowan pulled her knees up high to her chest, wrapping her arms around them. “I’m a new vampire who is literally afraid of the dark.”

She pointed toward the lamp on the table. “That lamp over there helps a great deal and so does your company. But seriously, what’s up with that? Why am I still feeling the effects of what that witch did to me?” Remy could hear the frustration in her voice as she squeezed her eyes tightly together. He didn’t try to correct her term.

She sat up in bed, rocking back and forth as she went on. “And Kaji left me alone. After seven years taking care of me, he up and leaves? That jerk!” She slammed the bed with her fist.

She gestured at the many empty bottles of blood scattered on the floor. “Plus, since I’ve changed, I’m
always
craving blood. These fangs won’t go away!” She gestured to her mouth where he could see her elongated canines.

Rowan shook her head, frustrated. “How the heck am I supposed to deal? I didn’t know it would be like this. Kaji should have just left me dead.”

Remy didn’t say anything and just looked at her in understanding. Then, “I’m sorry I can’t take away your fear. But I can ease it, if only just a little bit.” He moved from his chair to position himself next to her as his body sank heavily into the mattress.

She looked at him alarm. “What are you doing so close? Stay back, I’ll bite you.” Now that the desire to feed was so strong within her, she didn’t want to hurt Remy. She immediately backed away from him but Remy caught her by the arm and turned her around, placing her body against the mattress as her back pressed intimately against his hard chest.

“You can’t hurt me. I’m lapsus, so you instinctively won’t bite me because our blood doesn’t agree with you. If you thought about it rationally, you don’t actually want to bite me.” He lay behind her, wrapping his arms around her waist. Smiling playfully, he whispered, “Although, I wouldn’t mind it.”

Her body froze in Remy’s arms, her body shivering as his voice tickled her ear. Shocked, she heard him chuckle behind her. “I’m kidding. It’s really okay, though. I’ll tell you all about our weird lamia/lapsus relationship.” His voice was low and calming. It fluttered in her ears as she started to relax against him, taking in his warmth.

“You’re lonely and afraid and I’m here to keep you company. So just close your eyes and sleep. You’re not alone anymore.”

It was like he
knew
her. Rowan silently smiled at his teasing personality and tried to listen to his advice. He was right. She didn’t desire his blood when they were in close proximity and his presence seemed to have a calming effect on her.

She really wasn’t alone.

“Why do I feel like this?” Rowan found it strange that she actually felt at peace. The torment she suffered earlier was erased, as if locked far away in a little box in her mind.

Remy held her tighter in his arms. She felt secure and protected. “I tend to have that effect on people, another one of my so-called powers. It’s good to have in situations like this. When I was a kid, Sage would always come crying into my room with vivid dreams. I’d always be the one to calm her down.”

She stared at the wall, thinking about Remy’s powers. It was like the opposite of what her attacker had done to her at the coffee shop. Narrowing her eyes in thought, she whispered, “He never told me much about anything. Only that people called the lapsus would kill us if they knew we were here in Fallon. I never knew they were witches.”

Rowan paused then widened her eyes at an afterthought. “Please don’t tell me there are werewolves, too?”

Remy didn’t have to ask who
he
was. Instead he laughed at her comment. “No, there are no werewolves. Or fairies. And remember, we’re fallen angels, not witches. But the lapsus do have familiars.”

“Familiars?” Rowan wanted to continue talking because she feared falling asleep and didn’t want Remy to leave.

“Yeah. They’re sort of a lapsus’ pet. When fallen angels were exiled out of heaven and sent to earth, the big guy in the sky felt a little bad, so He each gave them a familiar that they could be with.” Remy gave a shrug. “They can be all sorts of animals, including wolves.”

“Really?” The information blew Rowan away. Wolves as familiars? And she thought vampires were a huge deal. No wonder Kaji never mentioned this to her—she probably wouldn’t have believed any of it.

Fallen angels?

Familiars?

“Remy, do you have a familiar?”
Was it hiding somewhere under the bed?

“Yes. His name’s Felix.”