Falling Bundle (16 page)

“I wouldn’t need to if you did it for me.” Arjen watched him with half-lidded eyes, his gaze dragging slowly up and down Max’s naked body.

That one smouldering look got Max instantly hard. He could never resist Arjen all wet and slippery and naked.

Max set about exhausting him some more. He kissed Arjen until he melted, rubbing himself against him, wanting his scent all over him. He licked the hot plane of Arjen’s throat, then his bare shoulder, tasting water and clean skin. Arjen gasped when Max bit him, a sharp scrape of his teeth. Arjen’s fingers wound through his tangled hair as Arjen arched under his mouth. Max turned him around, pinned him hard face first against the wall and spread his ass open.

Arjen knew what this meant; his body tautened with anticipation. He started squirming and fidgeting already while Max was still nipping the firm, tight cheeks of his ass, licking up and down the delicate cleft, teasing him more with every stroke of his tongue, working him up to a fever pitch. Until finally Max licked his pucker and Arjen said “Oh,” a hitch in his voice, his knees nearly buckling.

He tasted clean and good. Perfect for rimming him until he begged for mercy. Max held him ruthlessly open as he went to work, intent on driving him out of his mind. Arjen clutched at the tiles, scrabbled at them. Max knew he’d won when Arjen let his forehead drop to the wall, his body shuddering delightfully. “Max… I…”

“Yes?” Max smiled against the amazing curve of his ass.

“Please let me come.”

He truly was intensely gratifying. So well-behaved, so willing to plead. “When I’m ready.” Max licked him some more, pushed his tongue in and savoured his clutching reaction, the tightening of his ass, his thighs. Arjen’s voice rose into a sweet cry as Max tormented him, the water hammering against them both. Arjen was so hot, so wet and slick from the shower. Max could have strung him along for hours. Just getting him more and more worked up.

Impatience finally took over. Max turned him roughly, holding his elbow when he staggered. Arjen looked entirely fuckable, dazed with need, his wet hair falling into his eyes. He reached for Max to drag him closer. Max just lifted him against the wall, braced his ass with both hands and slammed into him.

“Ah!” Arjen’s head fell back against the wall as he clung to Max, every muscle clenched tight.

“Christ, that feels good.” Max muffled his groan against his throat, buried deep inside him, completely overwhelmed by the sensation. Max captured Arjen’s mouth; Arjen opened for him eagerly. Max shifted him against the wall and started pounding him in earnest. “You belong to me,” Max growled, punctuating his words with rough thrusts. “I own you.” Thrust. “I’m the only one who gets to touch you.” Thrust. “The only one allowed inside you.” Thrust. “You’re all mine
.
”

He couldn’t seem to hit the right angle to make Arjen completely come apart in desperation, so he slid Arjen off his cock, Arjen already keening a protest, and shoved him down onto his hands and knees so Max could take him from behind. He kept a rough grip on the back of Arjen’s neck, keeping Arjen’s face pinned against the tiles as Max slammed into him from behind. That was better. Harder. Deeper. Arjen’s gasps and cries just inched higher until Max wrapped his slippery hand around his cock and Arjen barely lasted another thrust before he came helplessly. Max followed with a growl and a sharp bite, shuddering out his pleasure, deep inside that hot, slick body.

After that even his insatiable Arjen was exhausted. They kissed for a time, slow and lazy. Max savoured the heat of the water, the steam curling tendrils around them, Arjen relaxed in his arms. But in the end Max kissed him one last lingering time and reached out to shut off the water. Arjen rested his head on his shoulder and clung onto him, clearly not wanting him to move. “I love you,” Max whispered to him.

“Course you do.” Arjen smiled against his shoulder.

Max grinned. It didn’t bother Max when Arjen didn’t say it back; Max kind of liked the way that Arjen still saved up those three words for the right moment, biding his time and springing his ambush unexpectedly. “How are you feeling?”

“Sore. In a good way.”

Oops. Maybe Max had been a little too rough with him. Max kissed his temple, tasting the water on his skin. “You were very well-behaved. You always are.”

After considerable discussion about what to do today, and a round of rock-paper-scissors which Max won, they went with Max’s choice of a day at the seaside. It was a crisp autumn day with gulls wheeling in a sky as colourless as glass. The wind was cold at first, but died away as they descended into a little seaside village sheltered among surrounding hills. Once out of the wind, the sun beat down hot and strong. They held hands as they wandered through cobbled side streets crammed with tourist shops, enjoying the sunshine and the crowds and the little ships in the bay.

Max sat on a sea wall, tugged Arjen down into his lap and wrapped his arms around his waist from behind. Arjen relaxed back into him with a happy sigh. Basking in the sun. Before them the sea whispered in and whispered out, all pale greens against the grey of the cliffs, a thousand glittering shades of jade. It was a perfect day.

“I like Sundays,” Arjen said.

Max laughed against his shoulder. “Good.” He stroked Arjen’s thigh daringly. “Still tired?” He wondered if he could get away with cupping Arjen’s crotch here in front of everybody, squeezing him, getting him nice and flustered.

Arjen grinned. “Hungry. I need to refuel.”

“Yes, you do. So I can wear you out again.” Max nibbled his earlobe.

Arjen melted into him with a sigh. “I’m glad you’re here.”

Max translated that as
I love you.
Max smiled. “I’m not going anywhere.”

“Good.” Arjen’s fingers curled into his shirt, holding him tight.

After lunch they stretched out in a secluded little niche far out along the pebbled beach in the scorching sun. Arjen draped himself all over the shirtless Max as he ate his icecream. He playfully dripped a bit of the melted icecream onto Max’s chest. It was startlingly cold and Max jumped and glared at him. Arjen had a sexy, challenging grin, daring him to say something. “You’d better be planning to clean that up,” Max said warningly.

“I seem to have misplaced any kind of washcloth.” Arjen’s eyes crinkled at the corners with laughter.

“Lick it. Now.”

Arjen licked it up with a sinful swipe of his tongue that got Max instantly, pleasantly hard. His tongue was shockingly hot after the cold icecream. Max growled. “You did that deliberately, didn’t you. You’re so bad. Do it again.”

Arjen dripped more icecream on him, licked him some more, making little sounds of satisfaction and hunger. Max loved the way that Arjen was clearly desperately attracted to him. Any excuse to lick him.

Arjen slowly licked his way down Max’s body to the edge of his shorts, nuzzling along the trail of fair hair down the centre of his stomach, then hesitated. Max took a firm grip on his hair. “You’re not backing out now. Tease.”

“Somebody might see.”

There was nobody around. They had picked a spot right at the edge of the bay, practically out to sea, shielded from view by towering cliffs. “You’d like that, wouldn’t you. Getting caught going down on me.”

“Hmm.” Arjen draped his warm arm across Max’s stomach and rubbed his cheek against the bulge in Max’s shorts with a little rumble of hunger.

He was adorable. Max ran his fingers gently through his hair. “I know you like having my cock in your mouth.”

“Yes.” Arjen nuzzled into him.

Max rubbed against his face. “Take it out and suck it.”

Arjen did not need further persuasion. He wriggled a little further down, tugged Max’s cock out and proceeded to give him a deliciously slow, lazy, appreciative blowjob. This was obviously Max’s lucky day; Arjen came up only to whisper how much he loved him, how handsome Max was, how sexy, then plunged back down, making Max groan. Arjen was so good at this, probably because of all the practice Max made him do. A tongue that wicked should be in politics.

Finally Max dragged him off. “That’s enough.” Arjen made a small sound of complaint; Max loved that dazed look of wanting more. “You’ve been so naughty today you don’t get to finish me off. You need to be punished properly. Drop your shorts and get over my knee.”

He could see that wicked light spark to life in Arjen’s eyes. Arjen put up only a token protest, clearly wanting to be persuaded. Max gave him a gentle shake by the shoulder. “Do as you’re told, Arjen.”

With a small whine Arjen draped himself over Max’s lap with his tempting ass bared. Max drew in a sharp breath, totally turned on by the sight of finger marks all over him where Max had gripped his ass while fucking him in the shower. “Put your hands over your eyes.”

Arjen fidgeted in his lap. “I don’t want…”

“Yes, you do. Hands over your eyes. Now.”

Arjen shuddered, and did what he was told. He was absolutely delightful like this, his body one taut line of expectation. “Stay quiet for me,” Max warned him. Then Max landed a hard slap to his bare ass.

Arjen yelped and jolted against him, getting harder against his thigh. “Hey,” said Max sharply. “None of that. I’m not going to spank you unless you stay quiet.”

Arjen went quiet, trembling now. Max spanked him again. Just a stifled sound from Arjen. Again. Again. “You’re going to get caught,” Max whispered to him, getting his ass nice and hot and stinging. “Somebody will come over at any moment and see you like this. Turned over my knee with your ass in the air. Getting what you deserve.” He dealt a particularly fierce slap and Arjen jumped against him. “I know you’d like that. You always like risking getting caught. You’d like everybody to see you getting spanked.”

Christ. Max could not wait a single second longer with Arjen squirming around like this; Max fumbled to get his hand around Arjen’s cock and jerk him off. Arjen gasped and clutched him as he came. Then Max slipped his own hard cock into that hot cleft and rubbed himself against Arjen’s ass. Arjen made a stifled sound, maybe sore from the spanking, but Max knew he liked a little bit of pain. The white heat of Max’s climax hit him hard and Max came easily, spurting all over his ass, his thighs.

Finally he let go with a growl. “There. That’s put you in your place.” Underneath him.

After cleaning up Max tugged his beloved into his arms and wrapped him up warm, both deliciously spent. He could feel a pleasant weight of tiredness settling on him as his heartbeat slowed, as he slid back toward sleep.

Arjen yawned and settled on top of him with his cheek against Max’s chest. The wind ruffled his dark hair. “Sundays are the best.”

“We don’t have to do this,” Arjen said.

“I’m good,” Max said, not very convincingly. “Let’s do it.”

They stood on a frost-touched pavement outside a beautiful gabled house in leafy Surrey. Tiles glittered above them, covered in a delicate layer of ice. A touch of mist smudged the horizon into the leaden-grey sky. The crisp air carried the scent of wood smoke.

Max swallowed hard, and stuffed his hands in his pockets. Fear tightened his chest and closed his throat. He was supposed to be tough, but right now he wished he could get back in the car and drive away.

Max had survived a lot of scary situations in his thirty-five years. He’d grown up in a disaster of a family not knowing where the next bruise was coming from. He’d gotten into a number of stupid fights in his younger days, including one memorable moment when a man had pulled a knife on him in a bar. Frankly, Max would rather be back there facing the glint of the steel. Because the prospect of Sunday lunch with Arjen’s family was way more terrifying than knives.

Arjen reached up and tugged Max’s coat straight, fidgeted with Max’s buttons. Each little touch that was meant to calm Max only reminded Max of how much he now had to lose. “It’ll be fine,” Arjen told him in a low voice. He only got ever more stunning in Max’s eyes, more smoulderingly dark, more open with his smiles and his affection. It made Max’s heart crack a little just to look at him. “They’ll love you. It will all be fine. I promise.”

“What if they don’t?” The rare family meals Max remembered had been deadly silent with the occasional burst of shouting. The memory tensed him up, that braced feeling, waiting for somebody to hit him.

Arjen took his cold face in warm hands and captured his eyes. Max couldn’t look away, the breath catching in his throat. “That’s not the point, Max.” Arjen absently stroked his cheekbone with his thumb. “I don’t care what
they
think. They’re my family. They’ll always love me. I’m only worried what
you’ll
think. I don’t want you to run away and leave me.”

“I’d never leave you.” It was an automatic response, like the way Max always moved without thinking so that Arjen could snuggle into his side and Max could wrap his arm round him.

Max had been so hardened once against the coldness of the world, the loneliness, the sense of being a tiny, insignificant dot on the face of an unfeeling planet. Arjen had sneaked into his heart so easily and cracked his shell into pieces. Max couldn’t go back to being alone, he’d never survive.

Arjen was the single best thing in Max’s life. It would break Max’s heart to be apart from him.

Arjen smiled a little sadly. “Sure.” He slipped his warm hand into Max’s and squeezed.

Max squeezed back. His throat tightened so that he couldn’t speak.

Crisp leaves crackled underfoot as they headed down the paved path to the house. Last night’s ice still clung in the gaps between the paving slabs. The house looked well cared for, the front door bright with paint, and hardy flowers still bloomed in blue-glazed pots. Max caught himself gripping Arjen’s hand tight as Arjen knocked.

The door cracked open. Max’s heartbeat kickstarted.

“Arjen!” A fair-haired woman with smile lines in her face held out her arms and Arjen hugged her tight. His mother Hanna had the same striking dark eyes, the sharp cheekbones and pointed chin. “It is so good to see you again. You should come home more often. You’re missing out on all our Sunday dinners.”

“I’d love to.” Arjen’s smile turned shy. “This is Max.” He tugged Max closer.

“Hi.” Max wanted to hide.

Hanna turned her full warmth on him. “Come on in, Max. I hope you like roast lamb.”

It turned out to Max’s relief that Sunday lunch was a relaxed affair. Arjen’s dad Josh was even barefoot, a tall dark-haired man with glasses, his sweater sleeves rolled up. He had the same ruffled, untidy hair as his son. Cute.

Josh shook Max’s hand in a strong grip, his smile crinkling the corners of his eyes. “It’s great to finally meet you,” Josh said in a deep baritone. “Congratulations on putting up with Arjen for so long. It must be a daily nightmare. Ah, the champagne we cracked open when we finally turfed him out of our house for university.”

Max’s eyes narrowed. Arjen was perfect, he was no trouble at all, and Max did not appreciate—

Then Arjen laughed. “Shut up, Dad.” He gave his father a playful shove.

Belatedly Max realised that they were teasing each other. Bantering. This was what a real family looked like: Josh tousling his son’s hair affectionately, Hanna kidding about hitting the sherry before their meal.

Max dared to relax a little, to accept that nobody was going to hit anybody. “You’re so right,” Max said in an earnest voice. “He’s a nightmare. He takes too long in the shower. He makes me bring him coffee all the time. He puts his feet up on my lap so I can keep his toes warm. I can’t believe I put up with him. It must be his charming smile.”

Arjen leaned into him easily, his face bright with happiness. “Whatever,” Arjen said. “You love me really.”

“It is a masochistic love,” Max agreed, rubbing his back.

They were welcomed into a huge front room with oak beams exposed in a vaulted roof. A fire crackled in a log burner, putting out welcome heat. The television babbled in the background, tuned to the Premiership football. The air was rich with delicious cooking smells. It was nice.

While Hanna was dishing up for lunch, cutlery clattering in the kitchen, Josh said, “So Max, what do you do?”

Max opened his mouth, then hesitated. He was an underpaid minion at a coffee shop. He hated the customers, hated the uniform, hated everything about it. Naturally, Arjen was a lawyer and his parents were both doctors. “Um…”

Arjen pressed into his side. “Max works in an indie coffee house. It’s really nice. They do book groups and all kinds of things.” He made it sound way more sophisticated than it really was. He was very sweet.

As they sat down to lunch, with sparkling wine a pale gold in tall flute glasses, Max was hit with the sudden memory of the last meal he’d had with his own family. The day he’d been thrown out of home. The sting of the fresh bruises on his face, the stunned sense that the world had flipped on its axis. The knowledge that from now on he was alone in a harsh world.

Josh topped him up with wine. “Everything all right, Max?”

Max should have kept his mouth shut but the truth escaped him in a sudden burst. “My family isn’t like this.”

Silence. Arjen reached out and covered his hand, a light touch. Max swallowed past the ache in his throat. “It’s—it’s nice here. That’s all.” The warmth, the laughter. He bet they hadn’t hit Arjen even once when Arjen was a kid. “You obviously did a great job with Arjen. I can see why he’s so… so…” Arjen stroked the back of his hand, and Max melted even more. “So nice,” Max said in a whisper.

The conversation picked up after that, giving Max time to steady himself and stop thinking. Surprisingly, Arjen’s parents seemed to like him. Max joined in with teasing Arjen. “He is such a deep sleeper,” Max said. “It’s ridiculous. The house could burn down and he wouldn’t know.”

“He could sleep through an air-raid siren,” his father said.

“I used to have to shake him to get him up in the mornings for school,” his mother chimed in.

Arjen pretended to scowl. “I hate you all.”

Max chuckled and ruffled his hair. Maybe Arjen might like to do this Sunday lunch thing again. “How long have you two been married?”

Josh turned an expectant look on Hanna, who laughed. “Don’t expect me to remember.”

“Never remembers our anniversary,” Josh said. “I put it on her calendar so she doesn’t forget.”

“Let me see. Twenty-eight… no, twenty-nine years. Since I first moved here from Leiden.” Hanna still had the echo of her Dutch accent.

“Thirty.” Josh hid his smile behind his glass.

“Thirty! Are you sure?”

“Alas,” Josh said. “Marrying you was a life sentence.”

“Are you planning to make an honest man out of our son, Max?”

Hanna said it lightly, like a joke, but Max immediately froze. His hands clenched helplessly at the sides of his plate. He could not think of a single word to explain the impossibility of having something so permanent, so trustworthy, so miraculous in his life.

The silence stretched out into uncomfortable territory. Then Arjen stepped in to cover for him, trying to smooth over the gap. “We, um, haven’t talked about that. And I don’t want to scare Max away.” He tried to smile, but he kept looking anxiously at Max.

Max stared down at his plate, the tender lamb no longer melting on his tongue. He had not been expecting that question; he had not realised that they would be thinking it. He did not dare look up. He did not want to see on their faces that he had disappointed them.

Arjen touched his arm gently, then shifted his chair closer to press his shoulder against his, warm and steady. It occurred to Max to wonder if Arjen would still want to stay with him should Max tell him they would never get married. If Max would have to do this to keep him.

Max leaned into Arjen without a word.

That silence lingered on the drive home. Max fixed his eyes on the icy road, grip tight on the wheel. Arjen said nothing beside him. Half a dozen times Max wanted to speak but couldn’t find the right words. The quiet was awful.

“I’m sorry,” Arjen said as they pulled into their driveway. He unbuckled his seatbelt. “I didn’t mean to scare you.”

Max stared at the steering wheel, drumming his fingers on it, then got out of the car without a word. The key turned easily in the lock of the front door and Max let himself into the cold house.

“Please don’t be mad at me.” Arjen’s voice tightened with pain behind him.

“I’m not mad.” Just terrified.

“Max…” Arjen sighed. He tugged Max toward the sofa, pushed him down onto it, then tucked himself into Max’s side. Max slipped his arm around him without thinking. “I’m sorry we upset you. I didn’t mean to. I’d never push you into anything you’re not ready for. I just thought maybe… some day…” Arjen bit his lip, and started over. “I know you love me. I know you’ll never leave me. That’s not so different from getting married, is it? I’d just like to know what you’re thinking. Because sometimes you go really quiet and it’s hard to understand what’s going on.” He twined his fingers through Max’s, his thumb rubbing gentle circles on Max’s palm. “Have you ever thought about it? Marrying?”

Max remembered that candlelit dinner when he’d first moved in, when Arjen had given him his new key in a jewellery box. The fear that it might be a ring. “No. No, I haven’t.” It came out harsh. Max’s jaw tightened as he fought back words. That panic inside pushed him to lash out, drive Arjen away, but he knew he mustn’t: he couldn’t risk something so, so important to him.

Arjen cupped his face in his hands. “What’s wrong?”

Max didn’t want to talk about it. All the old fears were flooding back, trying to drown him. He just leaned in and kissed Arjen silent.

Arjen melted into him, his fingertips light against Max’s face. Arjen murmured as he kissed him, little snatches of “I love you” against his lips. Max tugged on his shirt, and Arjen let himself be pulled, sliding easily into Max’s lap. Max settled him there, cupping his firm ass to hold him hot and tight against Max’s hardness. Arjen felt perfect straddling him, fitting against him as though made for it.

When Max kissed him again Arjen yielded so easily. He let Max capture his mouth and keep it. Arjen sneaked his hand under Max’s shirt, stroking and exploring Max’s bare chest, his abdomen. Arjen’s fingernails dragged downward and Max’s abs contracted reflexively as a hot shiver shot through him. Arjen made a low rumbly sound of approval and hunger. He really was adorable, squirming in Max’s lap and driving Max crazy.

“Be still,” Max growled, nipped his bottom lip sharply, then nuzzled along his rough jaw to find that sensitive earlobe with his teeth. Arjen’s head tipped back as Arjen moaned aloud.

“Talk to me.” Max’s voice dropped, deep and rough. He bit down harder. He often made Arjen talk to him during sex, getting Arjen to promise to always belong to him. He especially liked to hear Arjen’s voice crack as Max pushed inside him, when those whispers would break down into pleading for more.

But instead of saying
I belong to you,
Arjen said, “You belong to me.” He pulled back to catch Max’s gaze, his eyes so dark, so serious. “And I’ll keep you. I’ll never let you go.”

Max paused with his fingers curled around Arjen’s belt buckle, ready to strip him.

He liked it just as much this way, maybe even better. Because if he belonged to Arjen, Arjen would keep him forever. No matter how much Max panicked over stupid stuff.

He needed this intensely, the intimacy, the belonging. He wanted to express with each touch, with each kiss, that he loved this man desperately and never wanted to be apart from him. He had never thought of it as making love before, but as he readied Arjen and slid deep inside him with a groan of satisfaction, that term was occurring to him now.

Christ. Arjen felt fantastic on his cock, clenching around him, burying his face in Max’s shoulder with a moan of surrender. He was so hot, so slippery that Max had to take several deep breaths to avoid coming there and then.