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Authors: Ruth Ann Nordin

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focused so hard on making the fire that I didn"t have to think

about what almost happened in this room the night before. I

couldn"t bear that memory at the moment. After I was done

with the fires, I fed the horses. Mr. Statesman wanted to

examine my barn, and I was glad for his company. I had

admired him while I was growing up. I could understand

why my father was friends with him.

“This barn is in good condition,” he said.

“Mr. Martin owned this land before I got here, and he

took good care of everything he had. All I have to do is

maintain it.”

“Alex Dawson used to talk about farming, didn"t he?”

I smiled at the thought of my childhood friend. “He

has an aunt and uncle who live in Fargo. They knew some

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farmers, and they would share some stories with me and

Alex when I went over to his place to visit.”

Mr. Statesman nodded and walked over to the

horses. “I don"t recognize this one.”

“I bought that one in October,” I told him. “I wanted

to be sure that two horses were here during the day so Ann

could go into town if she wanted. I ride Lightning into town

when I go to work.” I petted my favorite horse affectionately.

“He"s always been a good horse.”

“I remember you used to take him out and race him

with Alex. Your father bragged that you were faster than

Alex on any horse.” He looked at me. “Your father wil come

around. He just needs time.”

I didn"t believe that was going to happen but didn"t

argue with him.

The snow storm had finally died down, but the wind

was stil blowing the snow around. I hadn"t taken much

notice of the snow storm with everything that was going on.

We returned to the house and sat down in the parlor to talk.

“Are you sure you won"t take the dowry? It is yours

since you married my daughter,” he said.

“No, sir. I wouldn"t feel right about it. I don"t mean

any disrespect.”

“I"m not offended, son.” He paused. He lit his pipe.

“I set aside the dowry when Ann turned sixteen. I knew it

wouldn"t be long before young men started to court her. I

have nothing to do with the money, and it will go to waste if

it"s not used. May I put it in the bank in her name?”

“That is fine.”

He shifted in the chair. “One thing we have always

told Ann is the importance of honesty. A person is only as

good as his word. I remember when she was twelve and

she was playing in the parlor. Later that day, I saw that her

mother"s favorite vase was broken. This vase wasn"t

expensive but it was sentimental. It belonged to her great-

great-grandmother. We questioned her about the vase and

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she said that it was still intact when she left the room. We

didn"t believe her, for who else could have broken it? She

had no brothers or sisters. So, we decided that she couldn"t

go anywhere but school for a month. That was the year she

missed Agnes" eleven year birthday dinner.”

“I remember that. Agnes cried all night.” I grinned at

the memory of my sister"s hysterics.

“Yes. I recal hearing that too. Well, the next week,

the servant who had been watching Ann the day the vase

was broken returned from her vacation and reported that the

neighbor"s cat had gotten into the house. That cat ran

through the parlor and knocked the vase off the table.

Apparently, the letter the servant left explaining this fell off

the table so no one found it until we searched for it. It was

under the couch. We felt awful after that event, but we

learned that we could trust Ann. Believe it or not, she even

confessed to sneaking a few cookies before dinner one

time. You would think it"s easy for someone to admit

something good but to admit to a bad behavior... That takes

character.”

“I understand.” He was telling me, in a very nice way,

that Ann didn"t want to kiss Kent, that Kent had indeed

forced the kiss upon her. I sighed. Certainly, he knew when

Ann was telling the truth, right?

“We received this from her.” He reached into the

breast pocket of his suit and pulled a letter out. I took it as

he handed it to me. “She is happy here, and for that, we are

grateful to you. Now, to change the subject, I want to learn

more about tractors. I haven"t seen one close up.”

I put the letter in my pocket, unsure of whether or not

I wanted to read it. “I have a book on the desk over there.

Would you like to see it?”

He nodded, so we spent the rest of the afternoon

looking through the book together.

***

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I did feel better by the time dinner was ready. I still

couldn"t look at Ann but did participate in the conversation,

which was an improvement over my mood earlier that day.

Ann"s father beamed at her. “That was delicious.

Betsy back home doesn"t cook stew this good.”

“Oh, Father. She"s an excellent cook,” Ann argued,

obviously pleased by the compliment.

“Which tel s you how good this stew is.”

He was proud of her, just as I was at times. I wanted

to be proud of her again.
If only Kent didn’t haunt me...

“It is very good, my dear,” her mother added. “You

have done well in learning so much. I don"t know how you

do it all. You must be exhausted by the end of the day.”

“I was at first,” she confessed, “but after I got used to

it, I hardly noticed how much work it was. You should have

seen my first attempt at cooking pancakes. It was a

disaster.”

I chuckled as I recalled the mess in the kitchen. It

took us a good half hour to clean it up. She was endearing

as she frantically scurried around the room to clean it up,

hoping I wouldn"t discover her mishap.

“I don"t mean to be rude but I have some dishes to

wash,” she said.

“Can I help?” her mother asked.

“Yes.”

“We"l get out of your way,” her father replied.

I wanted to stay with her and ask her again about the

events in the mercantile but realized it wasn"t the right time,

so I followed him out of the room.

***

That night, I sat on my bed. I was exhausted but

didn"t want to sleep. I stared at the wall for the longest time

as the events of the past two days played over and over in

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my mind. It didn"t make sense that Ann would want to

consummate our marriage if she planned to leave me. Why

would she risk getting a child with me? She had made it a

point to never spend a moment alone with any men while

she was living with her parents. Even now, I was the only

man she let herself be alone with.

She trusted me. She knew I wouldn"t force myself

on her. But she never allowed Kent to be alone with her. I

sighed. It didn"t make sense that she would be alone in the

backroom of the store with Kent. Then I remembered the

missing bell on the door of the store. That bell always made

the loudest ring. No one could miss it if they were in the

backroom. She would have come out of the backroom if

she heard the bell. Had the bell been there on the door, she

wouldn"t have been in the backroom with him. Then Mrs.

Carson would have been in sight and the kiss most likely

wouldn"t have happened. Could it be true that he forced her

to kiss him? Did he take advantage of the situation?
The

thought was too appealing to my wounded heart.

I stood up and walked to the window. It was a clear

night and the moon was full. It was the perfect night to be

enjoying Ann in her bed.
Any night would be the perfect

night to enjoy her.
I turned from the window and stared at

my room. It wasn"t as warm as her room, but I knew that it

felt lonely because she wasn"t here.

I remembered the letter her father handed to me.

What did I have to lose? I took the letter out of my pocket

and read it. It was written on October 13.

My Dear Mother and Father,

I was glad when I received your letter. In my hasty

departure, there were many things I failed to explain. But

first, I want to say I miss you both. Even so, I don’t regret

coming here. There are many things I have learned. I

actually cook and clean on my own. There is a good woman

who lives on the farm next to ours who has taught me to

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cook. When I started cooking, I made many mistakes. I

couldn’t even make scrambled eggs without cracking almost

a dozen eggs the wrong way or burning them in the pan. I

have gone through five pans already in my pursuit to be a

better cook. The laundry is tedious at times but it gives me

time to think.

I can’t remember what my life was like when I had

servants catering to my every whim, and to be honest, I

would rather do these things myself. It is fulfilling to do hard

work. Every time I see Todd’s eyes light up when he tries a

new recipe that turned out right, all of my previous failures

seem insignificant.

As for Kent, my heart is free of the burden of my

anger and grief. Todd has been patient with me during this

time, which must be hard for him. You were right about him.

He is a good man. I wish I had taken the time to learn that

while we were growing up. I keep wondering why I

continually pushed him away in Virginia. I can only come to

the conclusion that he didn’t stand out as men like Kent did.

Todd was shy and quiet. He stayed mostly to himself,

though Creepy Alex did bring him out of his shell. I hate to

admit it, but Creepy Alex probably wasn’t so creepy after all.

I should stop calling him ‘Creepy’ Alex. It’s a force of habit.

Anyway, it was Alex who realized what a good friend Todd

was when so few others did. Not that Todd didn’t have

other friends, but I don’t think any of them took the time to

see Todd for who he really was the way that Alex did. It was

Alex who encouraged Todd to pursue his dream of farming.

I didn’t even know of this until the night you dragged

me to the dinner at the Brothers’ house. I had wanted to

stay home and mope in self-pity, but you insisted I get out,

which I am very thankful for. That was the night when Todd

and I were on the veranda and he told me he was going to

leave for North Dakota. He also professed his love for me

and told me he understood that I didn’t share those feelings.

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It wasn’t until the Monday before the dance that I

decided to ask Todd to take me with him to North Dakota. I

considered asking him to stay in Virginia so I could take the

time to know him better, but it didn’t seem right to ask him to

stay when it meant he had to work at the bank. So I opted

to ask him to marry me and take me to North Dakota with

him. If Todd left, I would be stuck with settling with

someone who most likely would not love me as well as Todd

did.

You would be surprised at how he resisted my plan

at first. I know he resisted because he didn’t think it was in

my best interest. I had to threaten to run away if he didn’t

take me along. We got married by our preacher and you

know the rest. I have grown closer to Todd than I have ever

been to anyone. He still treats me very well and considers

my needs before his own. I can’t imagine my life without

him and am thankful for his love. I only hope I can be the

kind of wife who will bless him. He makes a wonderful

husband and he will make a wonderful father.

All My Love,

Ann

I set the letter down. She did love me. This time

when I cried, it was with relief. She was still here. She

didn"t leave with Kent. If she really wanted to run off with

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