Falling into the White (The Ancients Series) (5 page)

“Oh goodness, boy, get over here.” She walked around the counter, practically pushed me out of the way, and gave him a hug. Her eyes were filled with tears, and she kept thanking him over and over. She then turned to me and gave me a squeezing hug too. Jackie was surprisingly strong for an older, human woman. “You are one lucky young lady. If you know what’s good for you, you’ll keep this one close!” Jackie smiled and walked away then, swiping at the tears that had already started running down her rosy cheeks.

“What was that about?” I asked as we turned to leave.

“I just dropped off a donation. I, um…” he hesitated, and seemed almost like he was trying to decide whether or not to divulge a secret.

“Never mind,” I said. “It’s none of my business.”

“No, it’s okay. It’s just, most of our kind think less of me when they find out what I do with my spare time.” I quirked up and eyebrow in question. “I’ve been paying the shelter, in large donations, to keep from terminating the lives of any of the dogs that are brought in. Today’s venture was supposed to help find the older ones homes. That’s why I kept you in the puppy room today. It’s off limits to the public, in the hopes that some of the older dogs can find happy homes to go to.” He was talking fast, like he wanted to get it all out and face my judgment sooner rather than later. “I’m building a rescue, a private one, that won’t kill the animals brought in. Jackie is going to work in tandem with it, and send us the dogs she can’t re-home or keep here, so that we can help them.”

My jaw had fallen somewhere between my face and the floor, as I stood looking at him in complete wonderment. “Seriously, that’s what you were afraid to tell me? That’s amazing, Mikael! My God, I can’t believe that underneath the asshole I first met, you’re a good guy.” He flinched a little, clearly offended by the fact that I had called him an asshole, but relieved that I thought he was a good guy for doing what he was doing. “Sorry, I didn’t mean for it to come out like that.” He just shrugged at me.

“I am what I am, good and bad.” He turned, climbed right on his bike, and held my helmet out to me as I approached. This time, when I climbed on, I didn’t try to keep a mile in between us. I just scooted right up behind him, and wrapped my arms around Mikael. I thought I felt the tension just slip away from his shoulders when I did. Moments later, we were flying down the road again. I had to admit, riding on the back of his bike was kind of exhilarating. I love riding in my Jeep in warmer months with the top down, but this was almost like flying. The rush of wind reminded me of when I let my wolf take over and go on a good, long run. It was freeing. I decided then and there that I really enjoyed motorcycles. They weren’t just there to look cool, after all.

All too soon we were pulling into a state park. I’d never been before, because we had our own large expanse of nature to enjoy over on the pack lands. This day was definitely an experience for me. After dismounting the bike, I twirled around taking everything in. Granted, we were standing in the middle of a parking lot, but everything here was so quiet. The large, log cabin style ranger station looming in front of us was gorgeous. There were very few moments in my life where I had pictured my future, and in some of those imaginings I lived in a house that looked very similar to this.

“I’ll be right back.” Mikael said to me, bringing me back to the present. “Stay here, okay?”

“Sure.” As he walked away, I felt my phone vibrating in my inner jacket pocket, and took it out to check. It was Ashley, texting.

Just checking on you. Everything good?

All good here. Played with puppies, and now we’re in the woods. I’ll fill you in later. I sent back to her.

In the woods? Are you running, or what?

Don’t know. Just got here, but it’s a state park, so I doubt we’re running. Probably a good thing, considering my wolf has a mind of her own. A very dirty mind.

ROFL Ok, I want all the details later!

I flipped my phone closed, and tucked it back in my jacket as the door to the ranger station opened, and Mikael walked out holding a large basket in one hand and had a blanket draped over his arm. “What’s all this?” I asked him as he drew closer.

“I’m a planner. Come on.” He walked right past me, heading for a trail that started on the far side of the parking lot. My comment about him being an asshole when we first met had apparently struck a chord, because he was definitely distant now as he marched past me, damn near ignoring the fact that I was even there. Suddenly, I felt exhausted and just wanted to go home.

“Look, we don’t have to do this. I can call Ash to come get me or something.”

Mikael stopped in his tracks. He didn’t bother to turn around, but I saw the tensions seat itself firmly back in his shoulders. “If you don’t want to be here, you’re free to go. You’ve met your obligation.”

That tugged at my heart a little bit. I wasn’t supposed to care about Mikael. I was just doing this to stop the headaches, and appease Antoine. Me being here was pissing Evan off and driving us further apart. There was a part of me that knew I should take the out, turn around, and call Ashley to come get me. The other half of me, the bleeding heart part of me that couldn’t stand to see Mikael’s shoulders sunk low like that, started following him deeper down the trail instead.

We walked on for damn near twenty minutes, and ten of those we were off the trail, but when we got there it was so worth it. The trees opened to make way for a sparkling, cool, pool of water that flowed into a slim river, running away from us. That wasn’t even the best part. The pool was perpetually filled by a magnificent waterfall. It spilled water over the ledge above in three sections. The middle section was the heaviest, the one closest to us was only slightly more than a trickle of water tumbling down the rough edges and then free falling into the pool below.

“Wow,” I said as I finally released a breath. I turned to see Mikael looking up at me. He had been busy laying out the blanket and putting the basket on top of it. How did you find this place? It’s gorgeous.

“I came across it when I was out for a run. This is where I come to let the wolf out at night.”

I turned and walked back to the blanket and parked my ass on the edge of it with my legs pulled up to the side of me. “You know that little filter most people have between their brain and their mouth?” Mikael just watched me and waited for what I was about to say without acknowledging the question. “Well, I don’t have one. Shit just tumbles out of my mouth, and sometimes I regret it later. I didn’t mean what I said earlier. I mean, I did. You were an asshole when we first met, considering you attacked Ashley, and threatened me. But I meant that…” I took a deep breath and let it out. “You know, you’re different. Today, you were really different.”

“You don’t have to apologize, Jess. I may be playing this thing out, but I am not delusional.” He wasn’t looking at me as he said it. He was twirling a twig between his fingertips.

“What do you mean?” I asked.

“You’ve said it yourself. Evan is who you want. Being here,” he flicked his hand around to indicate where we were currently. “This is because you have to.”

“In fact, it’s not. You’ve already given me the option to leave, in case you forgot. I’m here, right now, because I want to be.” There was something in his eyes when he looked up at me then. The way their emerald beauty sparkled as he seemed to bore his way deep down into me with just that look, it was mesmerizing. “I know Antoine put us all in this position, and I will always hate him for it, and certainly never thank him, but I am seeing things I never would have. Like you with those puppies today. Or…” I just let the rest of it go, because I didn’t want to think about Evan and how much his attitude was pissing me off, but Mikael was waiting for me to finish, so I changed what I was about to say. “Or, how much I love riding on that bike!” I smiled at him now. “Seriously, it’s almost like a really good run. I felt like I was flying for a minute.”

The smile on his face just then was incredible, heart-meltingly stunning. Where Evan had one dimple on his left cheek, Mikael had one on each side. The slight stubble on his face didn’t hide them, and the combination made for one hell of a sight. “One day soon, when it warms up some more, I will take you for a much longer ride. We didn’t even really get to open her up on the way here.”

Okay, I didn’t even bother to hide my excitement at the prospect of taking a longer, faster ride with Mikael. My heartbeat picked up in my chest, when that nagging voice in my head started in on me. ‘What about Evan?’ I shut the thought down. I needed today. It was uncomplicated in and of itself. It was sweet with the puppies, dangerous with the bike, and just laid back out here listening to the waterfall’s trickling melody playing behind me. I was going to focus on the good of today, not the worry I would have later. “I’d like that,” I finally managed. “So, tell me about the dogs. How did you get involved in that?”

He actually looked a little embarrassed by my question. “That’s a much longer story.”

I pointed out that we were in the middle of the woods with nothing to interrupt us, and he smiled.

“Well, I was the middle child. Malachai was always under my dad’s wing, since he would one day inherit the title, and everything else. When Evan came along, he was the baby, but more than that, he was this special baby. You know the miracle that shouldn’t happen. So, I was the trouble maker. Just about the only time my dad had a minute for me was when he was yelling at me for doing something stupid in sight of other clan members.” He plucked at the blanket a little. “So, my dad hates the idea of people keeping pets, especially our kind. You know, I guess it’s a little too close to home for him since we shift into the cousin of a dog. Not that he would ever even come close to belittling our kind by thinking about that kinship. Pets were a way to get under his skin, in the beginning. I would go out in the surrounding towns, looking for trouble, and I’d end up having a stray dog or two follow me home. My dad always made me take them back. After a while, I stopped bringing them around, because once they follow you, it’s hard to get rid of them. Once, I couldn’t make this dog go away. He was a hound dog, probably someone’s hunting dog that had gone astray. Anyway, I couldn’t shake him. He was attached to me.” Mikael was faraway, lost to his memories as he told his story. “My dad had him killed. This poor hound dog latched onto me because he had no one else, and I got him killed. I didn’t mess around with the strays much after that. Not because I was afraid of my dad, but because I didn’t want to see them hurt.” He sighed there, but kept going.

“A few years went by with me being a complete asshole. I was terrorizing everyone and everything. My step-mom was at her wits end with me. I think she understood to an extent, but she couldn’t figure out what to do to calm my ass down. Then one day, she came to my room, all flushed and frantic, begging for my help. I followed her down to the stables. We didn’t have horses or anything, they were already there from a previous owner of the land. Anyway, most of the stalls were used as a sort of storage facility.

So, we get there, walk to the back of the barn, and here’s this dog giving birth to puppies. She’s already gotten two out, and there’s a third coming, but it seems like it’s stuck. I leaned down, immediately, wishing I knew more than I did about these things. I had no clue what to do. I was part fascinated, and part horrified. Eleanna said that we needed to help her birth the pup. She talked me through how to gently put my finger in there, and make sure the pup wasn’t caught up on a cord or something. We finally got the pup free. The mom didn’t make it though, in the end. So, Eleanna got me supplies. I camped out in that damn barn for three weeks playing nurse maid to those puppies, and making sure they all made it.” He paused so long there, that I thought he was going to end his story.

“What happened next? Did they all make it?”

“No, they didn’t.” Mikael shook off the dark look that crossed his face, and continued on. “After three weeks, my father finally realized he hadn’t seen me at meals, or any other time in the house, and he came looking for me. Finding me in the barn, living in squalor with these three pups pissed him off. I had been sound asleep when he came in and grabbed one of the pups. I remember him just bellowing out, ‘so this is the reason you’ve been absent from the house? You wish to be a momma to some pups? Well, boy, I think it’s time for another lesson.’ I screamed myself hoarse as he snapped that little puppy’s neck. It was the one I had helped get free of its mom. Eleanna came in just in time to see him toss the puppy at me, and reach for another. She yelled at my dad then, ‘don’t you dare harm that puppy! Your son did this for me. You will leave him to it, because it has kept him out of trouble.’ She fought hard for me that day, and didn’t come away unscathed either. Finally, my father relented and allowed me the indulgence of having my pets. I cared for those two dogs until they died of old age not long before I came here to find Evan for my father.”

“So, you decided to start a shelter?”

“Yeah, well, a rescue. I wasn’t sure if I could get another dog that was mine just yet, but I wanted to at least help other people know what that bond is like, and you know, save a few more dogs along the way too.” He smiled.

I had to stop myself from going to hug him at that point. Mikael looked up at me, his eyes locking with mine. I swallowed hard, and was the first to break eye contact. There was no denying that a part of me was very intrigued with Mikael, but I was also full of love for Evan, and mixed feelings about both of them. My head was spinning, so I did the only thing I could. I took a deep breath, peeled my shoes and socks off, and went to sit by the water. Yeah, I was running away from my crazy feelings, but at least I could make it look planned. After a few minutes, I looked back over my shoulder at Mikael, whose eyes hadn’t left me, and I tipped my head in an invitation for him to join me. He walked over, stood beside me, and looked down at the water.

“I bet that’s cold.” His deep voice resonated through me.

I looked up, and smiled at him. “Only one way to find out. Unless, of course, you’re scared.” I gave him a little pouty lipped face. “The big, bad, cold water might freeze your little toesies.”