Falling Light (A Game of Shadows Novel) (19 page)

He turned to face her, and he took her hands. Somehow, even though it was the first time he had reached out to her since they had parted early that morning, he felt more distant than he had before.

“That’s where I think you’re wrong,” he said. The gentleness in his voice was even worse than his touch. “Everything that you described—taking the gun, emptying the clip at two other people. That’s what I do. That’s who I am, and I don’t have a problem with that. You have a fundamental problem with it. That means you have a fundamental problem with me.”

This conversation had slipped out of her control. She tightened her fingers on his. “No,” she said. “I didn’t mean that. You’re twisting things around.”

“Healer and warrior,” he said. He touched her face lightly with the tips of his fingers. “We may need each other, but we do not always see eye to eye. We do not always come together.”

“What are you trying to say?” She tried to smile but it came out all twisted. “You sound like you’re trying to break up with me.”

“I could never do that,” he said, very low. “After all, we’re bound together, aren’t we?”

She sucked in a breath. The cadence of his words was both tender and bitter at once, and after everything that they had been through in the last few days, that was what hurt the most. “Maybe this was a mistake,” she managed to say. “I was trying to show you that I was doing better and that I got my balance back.”

“I’m glad you told me,” he said. All his emotion retreated until it was locked behind a fortress again, and Mr. Enigmatic looked down at her.

She shook her head. Suddenly she was furious with him. She didn’t think. She just flung words at him.

“How convenient for you that you figured me out so completely, despite everything that I’m trying to say to the contrary. It makes it so much easier for you to erect your walls and live behind them, just like you always have.”

The fortress cracked. His eyes flashed, and she saw that she had scored a hit.

He opened his mouth to reply.

A blast of fury and terror hit Mary. It knocked her out of her mental image. In Michael’s bedroom, she fell back on her heels, disoriented, while Michael surged out of his bed and slapped the light on.

Nicholas’s presence raged in the room. Mary rose to her feet as Michael asked, “What is it?”

The ghost said,
The Dark One is in my father’s house.

MICHAEL’S EYES FLASHED,
and he swore. “Has he taken them yet?”

They are getting close to the mainland.
They have no radio, or any way to reach them on the boat. My father cannot hear me unless he is asleep.
Nicholas rampaged the room like a cyclone.
I don’t know why I ranged ahead of them. Instinct. Habit.
I backed away as soon as I sensed the Dark One’s presence in the direction of my father’s house.

“Oh, my God,” Mary said. “Oh no.”

The news hit her like a punch in the gut. That wonderful, stubborn old man, and that sweet, sexy boy. If he took them, he could torture them for information. He could use them the way he had used her ex-husband Justin. The thought made her feel physically ill.

“Is there any way to make phone calls from here?” she asked. “Do they have cell phones with them?”

“We have a couple of satellite phones,” Michael said. He reached for a black T-shirt and dragged it over his head. “But they would need one too, and they don’t have one. They won’t get cell reception out on the water.”

He strode out of the bedroom toward the outer door, but before he reached it, Astra walked in. Her face had turned sharp and drawn. “What’s happened?”

“The Deceiver is at Jerry’s house,” Michael told her. “And Jerry and Jamie are getting close to the mainland.”

Astra sucked in a breath. “They both know the coordinates for how to reach this island. We’re not ready for a confrontation. We’ve only just reunited. Both of you have been seriously injured in the last few days. You’re barely rested, and you haven’t gained back all your strength. We have to pack and leave.”

“No, wait,” Mary said. “We have to find some way to help them. Nicholas said they haven’t reached shore yet.”

Both Astra and Michael turned to look at her. Michael said, “It’s a two-hour trip to the mainland. They may not have reached shore yet, but they are a lot closer to it than we are.”

“Our boat is bigger than theirs,” Mary said. “It has to be faster, right? We could try to catch them, couldn’t we?”

He shook his head. “We wouldn’t make it in time. They’ve gotten too much of a head start.”

Astra said bitterly, “I should never have let them go. I knew better, and I did it anyway.”

Mary cupped the back of her head with both shaking hands. Jerry and Jamie were doing fine. They were traveling on the Lake on a sunny day. They both believed that she had saved Jerry’s life, and all the while, they were traveling toward the worst death imaginable.

“There has to be something that we can do,” she said. “A spirit messenger. There has to be someone we can call on the mainland to get a warning to them.
Something
.”

“They can’t hear spirit messages the way we can,” Astra told her. The wrinkles in her face had deepened. “Sometimes Jerry hears snatches of messages in his sweat lodge or, as Nicholas said, in his dreams.” She looked at Michael. “We need weapons, clothes, money, and it wouldn’t hurt to have some food packed just in case.”

Astra walked to the refrigerator and pulled out food containers, moving more quickly than Mary would have thought possible. She unwrapped a loaf of bread and cut it into slices.

A chill washed over Mary. She said, “Two men are traveling to their deaths, and you’ve decided to make sandwiches.”

“Don’t try to lecture me, girl,” Astra snapped. The older woman looked up from her task, her gaze hot and black. “This is about survival.”

Mary looked at Michael, who hadn’t moved. Mr. Enigmatic watched her with a hooded gaze.

“We can’t do nothing,” she said to him, near to tears.

“Even if there was anything that we could do, if we help them we put ourselves at risk,” he said. His voice was cool, calm. It belied the escalating tension that poured off his body in waves. “And then we risk losing everything.”

“Listen to him,” said Astra as she slapped pieces of meat between bread slices. “We’re too vulnerable at the moment. We have to think of the greater goal.”

“Screw the greater goal, and screw the both of you too,” Mary said. The tears filled her eyes, but she refused to shed them. She said to Michael, “You may have lived behind that wall for most of your life, but you can choose differently. Be somebody better.”

His face went blank, his gaze distant. She felt like she was talking to that wall, her words useless puffs of vibration and air.

Nicholas coalesced close beside her. His energy still raged, but he felt as if he had gained control.

She turned to the ghost and looked up into his face. “I can’t do nothing,” she said to him in a quiet voice that deliberately shut out the other two. “But I don’t know what to do. Can you think of anything that we can try?”

The only thing I can think of is the Lake
, Nicholas said.
Your boat engine was dead last night, but it still brought you here in the storm, and it did so more quickly than you could have traveled on your own.

She spun to face the others. “What if you asked the Lake to help us again?” she said to Astra. “Then we might have a chance to reach them in time.”

Astra’s jaw angled out. She said between her teeth, “I won’t do it. It’s too great of a risk.”

The sickness in the pit of Mary’s stomach worsened. She couldn’t look at Michael. She walked to the fireplace hearth and grabbed her shoes.

“Mary, stop this,” said Astra.

Mary ignored her. She jammed her feet into the shoes and snatched up the poncho.

Michael angled his head to watch her. It was the only part of him that moved. His hands were fisted at his sides.

Astra pointed her knife at Mary, as she said to Michael, “Stop her from doing something wasteful and stupid.”

Then Michael moved. He strode to the metal door. He punched out a quick sequence of numbers, opened the door and walked inside a room. The door swung shut behind him.

Mary went beyond pain and turned numb. Of all the things he could have done, he simply walked away. It was incomprehensible to her.

“Come on,” she said to Nicholas. “You’re going to have to teach me how to start and drive a boat.”

The ghost silently followed her outside and down the path to the pier. While the sun was shining, the wind was sharp. It would be colder out on the water. She barely spared a glance at the bullet holes that dotted the side of the boat as she shrugged on the poncho and climbed aboard.

Nicholas’s raging energy had subsided. When she was standing in the cabin, staring at the all the strange knobs and dials, he finally spoke.

Mary
, he said gently.
If Astra won’t ask the Lake for help, there’s no way that you can make it in time.

She shook her head as she gripped the wheel in both hands. The tears that had been building finally spilled over and streaked down her cheeks.

“I’ve been on a boat exactly three times,” she said. “And that’s counting last night. I always meant to make time to go out on the water more. But I was always so busy. Sometimes after a really brutal shift at work, it was all I could do to get carryout on the way home. So you’re going to have to tell me how I start this damn thing.”

Nicholas’s warm presence surrounded her, as if he had taken her in his arms. She could still feel his pain through the contact, and yet he still tried to comfort her. He said,
I should go to be with them.

“Don’t,” she told him sharply. She scrubbed her wet face with the poncho. “Don’t go. If he senses you, he’ll destroy you too.”

They’re my family.

If she could have physically laid hands on him, she would have. “Sacrifice is one thing,” she said. “Suicide is another. Please don’t go. Stay with me instead.”

The sense of closeness to him eased, as though he drew back, but he still lingered.

How far away were Jerry and Jamie from the shore? The next few hours would be excruciating.

Not that the Deceiver would necessarily kill them in the next few hours. He might choose to hold on to them for days. The thought made her want to vomit.

A streak of movement outside the window caused her to lift her head.

Michael ran down the steep path. He was dressed much as he had been in her dream, in a black T-shirt, black cargo pants and combat boots. He wore weapons—a hunting knife strapped to one thigh, a handgun and an automatic rifle slung over one shoulder—and he carried another heavy black bag, but still his big body conquered the distance with impossible lightness and speed.

She stared as he jogged down the pier and threw the bag onto the boat.

He gave her a pointed look, eyebrows raised. “You weren’t going to get very far with the boat still moored to the pier.”

She burst out laughing, and she didn’t care if it sounded like a sob. “I haven’t figured out how to turn it on anyway.”

He untied the ropes that held the boat to the pier and threw them onto the deck. Then he leaped aboard and stepped into the cabin. The force of his presence filled the small, enclosed area.

Nicholas retreated further. He hadn’t promised her that he would stay, but he also didn’t leave. She sensed him hovering at the railing toward the front, as if he could make them go faster by force of will alone.

She stepped back to give Michael room and watched as he opened a panel and connected a few wires together. Only then did she see the ignition keyhole. The boat growled to life. Expertly, he shifted into reverse and they pulled away from the pier.

Then she repeated what Nicholas had said. “We’re not going to make it.”

“Probably not,” he agreed. “But we’re going to push as hard and as fast as we can go. We won’t stop until we reach Charlevoix, and we have an answer one way or another.”

When the boat had pulled clear of the pier, he spun the wheel and gunned the motor. They roared out to open water.

The floor shifted rhythmically underneath her feet, and she adjusted her balance to the dip and swell. When she felt like she could walk, she edged closer to Michael, who stood with his feet braced wide apart. She raised her voice to be heard over the motor. “What made you change your mind about going?”

“I didn’t. All I said was that it was a risk. I was undecided, and then I made up my mind.” He glanced at her, his keen gaze moonstone bright. “I’m not the only lunatic, you know,” he said. “I’ve followed you before too. And you never could give up on someone that you healed.”

The boat hit a bigger wave than most and lurched. She grabbed hold of Michael’s bicep to steady herself and hung on. After a moment, she said, “About that talk we were having before we were interrupted.”

This time he kept his gaze on the water. “Let’s finish that conversation later, when we have more privacy, and enough time to do it justice.”

“Okay.”

She looked out over the water too as she wrestled with her unruly emotions. She didn’t have time to think about her personal problems when she was treating someone in the ER, so she had some experience at compartmentalizing. She kept the thought of Jerry and Jamie in the forefront of her mind and settled into a clearer focus.

Michael said, “This is going to go one of two ways. Either we try hard on our own but we don’t make it, or Astra gives in and asks the Lake to help us again.”

“How likely do you think that is?” As she asked the question, she checked again for Nicholas’s presence. He was still with them.

Michael shook his head and shrugged. “I have no idea. Her decision will be based on weighing risks. We do have something in our favor that might change her mind.”

“What’s that?”

“When I made my choice, it shifted the balance. If we commit to fighting to keep Jerry and Jamie out of the Deceiver’s hands, we’re in more danger without her help than we are with it. Now she stands to gain more by helping us than by risking the possibility of the Deceiver taking one or both of us too. And she still needs our help.”

The bulk of hard muscle underneath her hand felt strong and steady. “For that to be true, she has to believe that we’re not just trying to force her into helping us.”

His lips pulled into a slight, hard smile. “Astra knows I don’t bluff.”

She looked back in the direction of the island—or what she had thought was the direction of the island. There was nothing on the horizon but the sun shining on the sparkling water. For all intents and purposes, the island had vanished.

She muttered, “That’s a fancy trick.”

He caught the direction of her gaze. “That is a much stronger and more effective null space than what I can produce. Astra started it, but over time, the land itself turned secretive. It began to project the null space on its own. It would be good if we could prevent Jerry and Jamie from giving that secret away, but over the years we’ve developed other contingencies. It won’t be the end of the world if we have to leave the island. We have several safe houses scattered across different states.”

“I just want to try to save their lives,” she said.

“I know.”

The sense of the lonely presence at the front of the boat became too agonizing for her to resist. She squeezed Michael’s arm. “I’m going to keep Nicholas company, if he’ll let me.”

Michael nodded without reply.