FallingforSharde_MLU (16 page)

She pressed a hand against her mouth, shaking her head. Dare she admit how much she missed him? She took a deep breath. She had to. “I have.”

“Forgive me?” He spread his arms wide.

She walked into his arms. They closed around her. She buried her face against his shoulder, tears streaming down her cheeks, her body shaking. Holding her close, he sank down to the floor, his lips against her hair. He rocked her, stroking her shoulders. “I’m so sorry I hurt you, honey. So sorry.”

She lifted her head and looked up at him through her tears. She touched his face with trembling hands. “It was partly my fault. I knew you were hurt and needed time. I should have been more understanding and given you the time you needed to heal. But I was selfish. I’d waited so long and I wanted you so badly that I pushed you into sleeping with her.”

His eyes blazed. “I did not sleep with her, Sharde! I swear I didn’t. I took her home because she reminded me of you, but when we got there, I couldn’t sleep with her.”

“It doesn’t matter if you did.”

“I didn’t and it matters to me that you believe me, Sharde.”

She looked in his eyes and saw no deception. “I do believe you.” She touched his lips. “I’m sorry I was so unreasonable. I should
”

He kissed her fingers. “You weren’t unreasonable. You were right. I was trying to make you accountable for past hurts that had nothing to do with you.” He stroked his hand over her face, brushing away her tears. “And I was incredibly blind. I can’t believe I allowed Linda and Vanessa to make a first-class fool of me while you were right under my nose.”

“Why didn’t you try to call or see me after I resigned?”

“You were so angry and hurt, I was afraid that if I didn’t give you some space I would lose you for good.” He reached behind her head, pulling out the pins to allow her hair to fall around her shoulders. He buried his face in the resulting cloud, inhaling deeply. “I thought about you all the time and wanted you so badly I couldn’t sleep at night.”

He sighed. “Besides, I picked up the phone to call you at least five times every day. And we won’t even talk about all the times I drove here in the middle of the night and just sat outside in the parking lot looking up at your dark living room windows. And when I realized you were seeing Frazier–”

“I’m not seeing him!” Well... at least she wasn’t seeing him now.

“No? A few weeks ago, one Friday night, I drove by Seafood Wharf and saw you two standing together in the parking lot. He kissed you!”

“On the cheek!”

“He had his hand on the back of your head. I don’t think he’d need to do that to kiss your cheek. He was kissing your lips. And you didn’t seem to mind!”

She nodded. “He did kiss me on the lips a few times.”

“And you let him?”

She tightened her lips. “Yes, Jefferson, I let him.”

“And you enjoyed it?”

“Did you enjoy kissing Vanessa?”

“We’re talking about you and Frazier.”

“Yes, Jefferson, I enjoyed having him kiss me. And you want to know something? I kissed him back. So where does that leave us?”

He raked his hand through his hair. “I knew I should have put my foot up his ass!”

She laughed. “That’s the same thing he wanted to do to you.”

He sucked in an angry breath. “And you find this funny?”

“Oh, Jeff, lighten up, will you? If I wanted him instead of you, I could be in Jamaica with him now. We kissed and we both enjoyed it, but we never slept together. We both like seafood and neither of us had any plans, so when he called...”

“How many times have you been out with him?”

“A few... a couple of lunches and two or three dinners. But we’ve never slept together.”

He nodded. “If I didn’t know that, I’d have wrung his overly tanned neck by now!”

“He’s lonely and so was I and we decided to be friends without benefits.”

“Friends, hell! I saw the way he was looking at you when Ben and I encountered you two that night. He wants far more than friendship from you.”

“That’s all he got!”

“This
friendship
you have with him. Is it over?”

“He’s out of the country at the moment.”

“When he returns? Do you plan to see him again?”

She shook her head. “I don’t know. I like him. He’s fun to be with and easy to talk to.”

“If you want to talk to a man other than me, talk to Benton.”

She looked at him wondering what he’d say if she told him Benton thought she had a luscious ass. “Are you going to have a problem with my being friends with Clayton?”

“Of course I will!”

“I’m sorry to hear that, Jeff, because I’m not prepared to allow you to pick my friends.”

“Meaning what? You’re going to go on seeing him no matter what I say?”

“Yes, Jeff. That’s exactly what it means.”

“So how I feel doesn’t matter to you?”

“Of course it does! Why do you think I’ve kept him at arms’ length all these weeks? It was because of you... of how I knew you’d feel and how I feel about
you
. But in that time, he and I have become friends. I’m not prepared to have you walk back into my life and order me to give up his friendship.”

“Sharde–”

She shook her head. “Let me finish. I can promise you that we have never slept together and we never will. Is that good enough for you?”

He took a deep breath. “I suppose it will have to be, but–”

“If you ever got to know him, the two of you would like each other.”

“Oh, I don’t think so. I can’t imagine liking a man I
know
is lusting after
my
woman.”

“Would you prefer no other man found me attractive?”

“Yes, I would!”

She sighed. “Fine, Jefferson, but I don’t want to talk about him. This is about us. I want to talk about us.” She moistened her lips. “Did you mean it when you said you’d marry me?”

He nodded. “Yes. That was a lousy way to ask you, but I did mean it.” He kissed her cheek. “Tell you what, pack that sweet little red teddy you bought a few months ago, come to the cabin with me. We’ll light a fire, have some wine with dinner, and then I’ll get down on my knees and I’ll ask you again, much more romantically this time.”

She swallowed a lump of emotion and frowned at up at him. “Well, hell, Jefferson, I don’t know. You think you can get it right this time?”

He smiled and hugged her close, pressing his cheek against hers. “I know I require a lot of work and–”

“Maybe so, but it seems I’m a glutton for punishment because I’ll gladly take you just as you are.”

“You will? Really?” He pulled back and looked down at her. “You are so beautiful.”

There was a hint of moisture in his eyes and no trace of guile in his voice. He must be blinded by love because she knew he really thought her beautiful.

He stroked her cheek. “Yes, you’ll come to the cabin with me. Or yes, you’ll marry me?”

“Yes to both... if you’re sure... if it’s really what you want and not just what you think I want.”

He sighed. “I was a fool not to realize before you left how important you were to me. I’m very sure.”

She leaned into him. “I love you, Jefferson.”

He stared at her, making a sound that was half laugh, half sob, and then he gathered her in his arms and held her so tightly she could barely breathe. She didn’t protest. Breathing was overrated. She slipped her arms around his neck, lifting her face to him, offering him her lips, her eternal fidelity, her trust, and her heart.

He pressed his mouth against hers. His kiss was all at once sweet and tender while promising a depth of passion she had missed so much she could barely sleep at night for thinking about it. She surrendered to her desire and love for him, confident her heart would be safe with him. He hadn’t actually used the words “I love you,” but some things a woman knew without words. The tender passion of his kiss assured her that she was loved. At last, she was Jefferson Calder’s woman.

He brushed his lips against hers. She felt the moisture on his cheeks. “I love you too,” he whispered. “I’m sorry it took me so long to realize it and even longer to say it.”

Yes! Jefferson Calder was in love with her too! Finally, everything was right within her world. She smiled through her tears. “Don’t worry. We have the rest of our lives together for you to make it up to me.”

He pulled her into a tight embrace. “That’s probably not going to be long enough, so I’d better get started now.”

She sighed softly as he rained feverish kisses on her neck. “Shall I get out that teddy?”

He lifted his head and unbuttoned her blouse. Removing her bra, he brushed his lips against her nipples. A shock of desire shot down her spine to curl her toes. “Oh!”

He lifted his head and quickly undressed them both. When they stood naked, he cupped her face between his palms. “Save it for another time. I’m so hungry for you I don’t want anything between us.”

She stroked a hand down his chest, loving the feel of his tight abs. “Nothing? Not even a condom?”

“The only thing going into your sweet pussy tonight is my bare cock.”

She sucked in a breath. If he wasn’t going to at least make a token argument for their using a condom, he really was committed to her. “Oh, Jeff! I’ve been a bad girl,” she told him. “I think I need to be spanked.”

“I think so too.” Slipping one arm around her waist to hold her tight so she could feel his hard cock between their bodies, he lifted his other hand and gave each of her cheeks a light paddling.

With her heart racing in anticipation of the night ahead of them, he took her hand in his and led her to her bedroom. He bent her over the chair by the window. She closed her eyes, certain he was about to fuck her ass. Instead, he kissed his way down her back to her cheeks. He pressed several warm, biting caresses against her bottom, then sat in the chair, stretched her over his knees, and spanked her until she gasped and shuddered each time his palm landed on her cheeks.

Then, when her ass stung and she was breathless with need, he took her to the bed. He placed her on her hands and knees. Moments later he kneeled behind her. He kissed her cheeks again, then gently parted them.

She caught her breath and looked back at him. A condom covered his cock and he held a tube of lube in his hand. “What are you going to do with that?”

“What do you think?” He lightly lubed the condom and then, holding her cheeks apart, he used a finger to press some of the warm liquid inside her. The muscles of her stomach tightened as his finger pierced her, pushing the lube into her. He added a second finger and gently pumped into her.

“Oh, baby, you’re so tight. This is going to be good.”

“Jefferson, I didn’t say I was going to let you–”

“I don’t recall asking for permission.” He removed his fingers, parted her cheeks again, and placed his cock between her cheeks at her backdoor. “You’ve been a bad girl and bad girls get fucked up their pretty brown asses.”

She tensed, feeling him hard and warm against her. “I don’t think I’m ready for this.”

“Then why are you trembling? And don’t expect me to believe you’re trembling in fear.” He slapped both her cheeks. “It’s time you learned who the hell you belong to, Sharde.”

“Jeff–”

“Save it,” he said and propelled his hips forward.

She caught her breath and closed her eyes as the head of his cock lodged in her. He paused, allowing her to catch her breath. He bent over her, brushing his warm lips against her shoulders. “All right?”

All right? The man she loved was about to make one of her fantasies come true. “Yes.”

“Then here I come, baby.” Sliding his hands up to her hips, he held her still and slowly pushed his hips forward.

She moaned as inch by inch his big cock slipped into her rectum and up into her eager ass. With half his cock inside her, she gasped. She so was full she was afraid to move. “That’s enough,” she whispered.

“It’s not nearly enough,” he said in a hoarse voice. “You belong to me and after tonight, there won’t be any doubt of that.” Sliding one arm around her waist and keeping his cock in her, he rolled onto his side, pulling her down with him. Lying on his side behind her, he pulled her hips back, and pushed his hips forward.

“Oh... god!” She cried out as the rest of his cock shot up into her ass. “Jeff! Oh, my god, Jeff!”

Balls deep in her, he put the hand he’d used to finger her ass over her breasts. The fingers of the other hand slid around her body to her pussy. “Now,” he groaned, his lips against her neck. “You’re all mine and it’s time for pretty bad girls to get punished.”

With an ass full of cock and a wet pussy, she did the only thing she could. She surrendered to him completely, driving her hips back against his body and reaching one hand behind to clutch at his buttocks as he started to fuck her ass. “Oh, yes! Punish me, Jeff!”

He eased most of his cock out of her and stroked half his length back into her. He did that a few times as he nibbled at her neck. His first sweet strokes in and out of her were long and shallow. “How does this feel?”

“It hurts.” But even as she spoke, she thrust her hips back against him and moaned in delight as she felt his cock sliding up into her to reclaim her ass.