Family in His Heart (11 page)

She could see the bend of the island and recognized Cube Point. “Am I heading toward Hessel?”

“As good a place as any.” He brushed her arm with his fingertips and a shiver coursed through her.

Stop it, she said in her head. She felt mushy inside and the feeling had to stop. Maybe she should call him Mr. Thornton. The formal name might keep her jangled nerves from tempting her imagination.

“You’re doing great,” he said, slipping deeper into his own seat.

They both settled into silence covered by the sound of the motor’s roar and the wind whipping past their ears. Rona’s confidence grew. As long as they were alone on the lake, she realized nothing could happen, but as she guided the boat around Cube’s Point and saw Hessel in the distance, her assurance waned.

She gave a frantic look toward Nick, but he didn’t come to her rescue. “Just slow up when you get closer to shore. That’s regulations anyway.”

“Regulations?”

“Good boating. Be kind to your neighbor and avoid a large wake.”

She understood and slowed, then headed the prow toward the Hessel marina, frightened but amazed at her sense of freedom.

“After we dock, I want to take a ride to the church.”

“The church?”

“Gary’ll need a ride to his new job. If he’s ready, we can drop him off. Maybe have lunch.”

Church? She felt her pulse kick in.
Lord, You are so determined.
It’s just like Shirley said. Jesus searched for even the dumbest lambs and brought them back to the fold.

N
ick feared he’d pushed too hard on the spiritual issue. He knew where his heart was headed, but he needed to make sure he and Rona were on the same spiritual track and, right now, he knew they weren’t. Yet when he looked in her eyes as they talked, he had great hopes.

He’d heard her slip so often lately. She’d mentioned blessings and yesterday she’d quoted scripture. If that wasn’t a sign from God, he didn’t know what was. She’d left a crack in her armor and the Holy Spirit knew where to sneak in.

His pulse quickened when he gazed at Rona beside him in the SUV as they headed for First Christian Church. He hoped she’d see the kindness of the pastor or even like the attractive building, anything to get her to attend. Even once would open her heart more, he felt confident.

The silence settled around them. Rona had drifted into her own thoughts, and he, in his. He loved the way they could laugh and talk, then settle easily into the quiet of their own thinking.

He’d so longed to know more about Rona. She’d given him that bitter summary of her family. He knew she’d loved her mother and guessed she’d wanted to love her father and brother, but alcohol and who knows what else had kept her from doing that.

Her brother caused him the most concern. He guessed Rona had come to Hessel to escape him more than find herself, and he wanted to know why. She’d avoided talking about family until he pushed, but he understood. He’d told her little about Jill and his recent talks with Gary. If he truly cared about Rona, he should be open with her. He needed someone to talk with and he’d already thought that maybe God had sent Rona into his life as a release from his solitude in more ways than one.

When he glanced toward her again, she looked back at him. “We’re both quiet today.”

“It’s nice, isn’t it?”

She gave him a tender smile. “Sometimes it is, but I’ve had a lot of quiet time to think. Sometimes I like a little excitement.”

Excitement? “Then you’re sure to love the Thornton home.” He sent her an I-hope-you-understand look.

She nodded. “I haven’t gotten the total picture yet.”

He felt a prayer leave him, asking God to spare her the worst of it. “Maybe Gary will change after this incident. I’m hoping a job and getting back to his friends at church might make a difference. He seemed to fit in so well until he pulled away.”

“People pull away to punish themselves sometimes. Other times it’s a cry for help. Maybe Gary has something he needs to talk about, something he wants to get off his chest.”

“I’ve sensed that.” Gary had talked about Jill, but what else bothered him? Nick longed to find out and soon.

He turned into the church parking lot, pleased to see the number of youth volunteers giving the grounds a spring cleaning. When he saw Pastor Al, Nick gave him a wave, parked and motioned Rona to join him. Though she hesitated, he saw her push open the door and follow.

“How’s it going?” he asked as he came closer.

“Great.” The Pastor swung his arm, pointing in every direction. “We have kids all over the place.”

“Pastor, this is Rona Meyers. She’s…a friend and our new housekeeper.”

“Nice to meet you, Rona. Are you new in town?”

She nodded and Nick noted that she looked uncomfortable.

“We’d love to see you join us tomorrow for worship.”

Rona hesitated, as if trying to find words. “Thank you,” she said finally.

Nick jumped in. “Have you seen Ga—”

“Last I saw Gary he was around the corner digging up the flower beds.” He gave Nick a wink.

“Thanks.” Nick wasn’t sure what the wink meant. He reached for a handshake, then patted the pastor’s shoulder instead when Pastor Al held up his dirt-laden fingers.

He gave Rona a nod to follow and she moved into step with him. When they rounded the corner, Nick understood the wink.

Gary had collected a bevy of girls who were planting flowers while he dug up the beds.

He gave Rona an arched brow and she grinned.

“Should I ask? Is this like father, like son?”

“Not me,” Nick said, hoping to sound lighthearted and giving Gary a call.

His son spun around, a startled look on his face that quickly turned to a frown. “What’s up?”

“I thought you might want a ride to work.” Nick saw the girls’ attention turn their way.

Gary glanced at his watch. “I still have an hour. It only takes a few minutes to get there.” He lowered his voice. “I want to get the volunteer hours over with.”

Disappointed, Nick stood a minute without speaking. “Okay. We came to town to do a few things and I thought I’d offer.”

“Jeanie offered to drive me to work.” Gary gestured toward one of the prettiest girls in the bunch.

Nick nodded and sent up a prayer. “Okay. Just don’t be late on your first day.”

Gary scowled. “I won’t, Dad.”

Nick backed away with Rona at his side. When they were out of view, he stopped and shook his head. “I’m hoping he’ll want to get more involved here when his volunteer hours are over. I’m praying for it.”

Rona touched his arm. “It would be good for him. He’s doing a pretty good job of making friends.”

Her comment made him laugh. “Or enemies depending on who’s looking at it. Some of those guys might be envious.”

“Church boys envious? That’s a sin.”

Nick chuckled and clasped her arm. Rona’s faith had begun to grow.
Thank You, Lord.
That would be one worry off his mind and give him time to concentrate on his son.

We’d love to see you join us tomorrow for worship.
Rona didn’t know if she should laugh or cry. God wouldn’t give up and she’d gotten to the point that fighting Him seemed ridiculous. Nick’s faith powered him in his darkest hours. He’d been strong during Gary’s latest situation—upset, yes, but never wavering. He’s proven a wonderful example of what faith should do. Maybe the Lord hadn’t failed her, but she had failed the Lord.

She liked the pastor’s friendly manner. He’d looked delighted when talking about the number of youth working to spruce up the church grounds and his voice sounded caring and his smile seemed kind.

When she dropped the church-issue from her thoughts, she looked at the highway, surprised they were heading toward Cedarville. They’d passed her old motel, bringing back those feelings of loneliness that had been overwhelming when she’d first arrived. Amazing how three weeks could make such a difference.

She looked at Nick’s handsome profile. “Why are we going to Cedarville?”

“I thought I’d show you something interesting, something I don’t think you know about the islands.”

Rona looked out the passenger window, desiring to ask questions but not wanting to ruin his surprise. Nick seemed to delight in doing thoughtful things for her. He’d cleaned the apartment, cooked her a glorious meal on Memorial Day—so many little things that made her feel special.

The trees flashed past and in a little distance, he turned onto Hill Road—she noticed on the sign—and when they crossed a short bridge, he stopped and pointed.

“Hill Island.”

Rona turned to look at him. “We’re on one of the islands?”

“A couple are connected with bridges.” He pulled away, grinning as if he had another surprise for her. He followed the narrow road, turned right and crossed another bridge, then pulled to the shoulder. “Let’s get out. It’s a nice view.”

Rona looked ahead toward the backdrop of dark evergreens to a sea-green sign with Island 8 painted in bright gold letters within a scroll design. “Number eight. Isn’t that a strange name for an island?”

Nick shrugged. “Maybe they ran out of names.”

She smiled at his comment and followed him outside. He ambled to the guardrail and pointed to the boat docks built with boxlike structures beneath them. To help them last in the freezing weather, he told her. Ahead she saw boathouses and docks with speedboats and runabouts moored to their side; she guessed the houses were deeper in the woods.

The blue sky and the quiet put her at rest. She turned to face the other view and felt drawn to the landscape. “It’s so awesome.”

Rona crossed the road and leaned against the rail, looking out at a small pontoon boat at the end of a long dock adorned with an American flag. The boat was surrounded by tall grasses jutting up from the lake with only a narrow path leading to the clear water. She’d felt hemmed in like that so often, but sometimes the path out of her dilemma wasn’t as obvious as the one she saw today.

Nick stood close beside her. She felt his arm brush against hers softly.

“Look at the view,” he whispered.

She looked out beyond the circular tree-lined bank and admired the islands dotting the silver-blue water. “It’s peaceful.”

Nick turned his back from the scene and rested it against the guardrail. “I wish my mind felt this tranquil.”

Rona caught an inflection in his voice that spoke to her. He wanted to talk. “Tell me about it.”

His brow lifted as if astounded she’d understood. He bent and pulled a blade of tall grass from along the fence and ran his fingernail along its vein. “It’s confusing and I’m not sure what is the truth and what isn’t.”

She listened as he began telling her about his wife and Gary’s comments. “I never thought about it before, but when I think back, I realize now she was unhappy. Maybe it was my work hours. Maybe it was Marquette Island. I’d moved into the house for her. I could have sold it after my parents died. Jill sometimes talked about feeling stranded, even though she had the runabout.”

He shrugged and Rona saw the pain in his eyes.

“I’d always thought maybe the accident had been my fault. I hadn’t noticed the raft. I hadn’t been there before that I can remember, but I’d turned back to look at her, and the next thing I know, she’d swung out and smacked into it. She’d died so fast, and—”

Tears welled in his eyes. “And Gary saw it. He was thirteen and saw everything. I know he blames me.”

She’d known. Rona didn’t speak but lifted her arms and wrapped them around his torso. Nick lowered his head to her hair and she could feel his body quaking beneath her hands. Gary had hurt him to the core with his attack, but if Nick had been careless, it had still been an accident. The facts spun in her mind.

“I’m sorry,” he said, lifting his head.

She looked into his glassy eyes and felt her own tears well. “Nick, it was an accident.”

He blinked and shook his head. “I’m not sure now. If Jill had been drinking, then something serious had been wrong. I never understood how she’d hit the raft. She’d been a good skier.”

She realized he’d deduced something new from what Gary had said and she feared she understood what he was saying.

“I’m afraid Jill ran into the raft on purpose.”

Suicide? The word struck Rona like a knife.

“Her judgment might have been impaired. It could have been anything.”

He stayed silent a moment. “You’re right. I don’t suppose we’ll ever know.” He swallowed and raised his eyes toward the islands in the distance. “But Gary blames me, and I have no explanation for what happened.”

“You do,” she said, lifting her hand and pressing it against his cheek. “I understand. You don’t want to add to Gary’s worry.”

“How can I tell him that Jill may have taken her own life?”

She drew her fingers along his strong jaw, feeling the beginning raspiness of whiskers. “And maybe she didn’t, so you can’t tell him that.”

He nodded and lifted his right hand to press against hers. “I suppose. What good would it do anyway?”

“And Gary’s problem could be deeper than he’s saying. He might be sorry that he didn’t tell you about the wine. He might be…anything. You don’t know how much blame he’s put on himself.”

“That crossed my mind, too. If things calm down and Gary becomes more like the son I had before Jill died, I hope we can talk.”

“You will,” she whispered.

Their gaze connected and Rona’s chest tightened with the look in his eyes. She knew what could happen at any moment, and though part of her wanted to step away, the other part drew closer.

Nick’s eyes searched hers and she couldn’t hide the longing she felt any more than she could push him away. His arms pulled her to him and his mouth lowered to hers with a kiss so gentle, yet so demanding, she couldn’t breathe.

When he drew back, his face filled with apology. “I shouldn’t have—”

She pressed her finger against his lips. “Should haves are in the past. Now is important.”

He pulled her into his arms and kissed her again.

Nick had struggled with himself since he’d kissed Rona on the Island 8 bridge. Every minute had thrilled him, but when his logic had returned, he realized he’d gone against his own wisdom.

Though Rona had shown him more and more that she’d only been angry at the Lord and not that she’d been an unbeliever, he needed to be assured before he could allow himself to fall in love with her. The idea sent him spinning. Too late. He’d already fallen and hard. But he sensed she had concerns, too, and to form a bond blessed by God, they both needed to be certain about a lot of things. He couldn’t go on kissing her this way without moving deeper into a relationship, and he knew that wouldn’t be God-pleasing.