Fan Fears: A collection of fear based stories (4 page)

FOUR

A week had passed, and the news coverage had almost died down. Colleen had been assured that the police were still hunting for Ashba, but the trail had gone cold, and they were relying on new information coming in that would point them in the right direction. Naomi had gone home, back to her children, and Colleen was now alone. Despite the lack of news coverage, the press was still outside, their vans with satellite dishes on the roof parked in the street, making her a virtual prisoner in her own home. It was a little after eleven, and she still couldn't sleep. Even with the numerous assurances that she was doing the right thing, the guilt was still there. She knew Ashba had a family, a wife and two children who had all appeared in the news and slammed the actions of their father. According to unconfirmed reports, there were more indecent images on Ashba’s home computer, and he was being further investigated about a series of historical abuse cases from the early eighties onward. She had been in bed for three hours, but was still wide awake and staring at the ceiling. She was tired and felt completely drained of energy. Deciding that sleep wasn't going to be coming, she got up and went downstairs, keeping the lights off to avoid the harassment from the press who were still congregating outside the house. She went into the kitchen and switched on the kettle, hating the way she felt. She was awake and tired, hungry but full, thirsty but not. Her stomach danced a butterfly dance of nerves and uncertainty about what would happen next. As the kettle started to come to a boil, she went to the fridge and took out the milk.

“You ruined me.”

Colleen dropped the carton and spun around, staring at Ashba who stood in the corner of the room. For a moment, there was silence between them, the only sound that of the milk as it spilled out onto the floor. She barely recognized him as the same man. He had lost weight, and a salty stubble peppered his cheeks. He looked exhausted and frustrated. She glanced to the glass patio doors and saw that they had been forced open. In the back of her mind, she realized she hadn't even set the intruder alarm.

“You shouldn’t be here,” she whispered, backing against the counter top.

“No, I shouldn't. But because of you, I am.”

“I’ll scream. They’ll hear me outside.”

Ashba twisted his lips into something that could be considered a smile. “Don’t worry, I didn't come here to hurt you. I'm not the monster you think I am, despite you ruining my life. I came to ask you why you did it.”

“You know why I did it. You had those pictures....”

“You illegally accessed confidential information that had nothing to do with you.”

“You left me alone with your computer.” she fired back.

“Not to look there. Where’s the justice? All I did was try to help you, and you do this.”

“You had those pictures, don’t put this on me.”

“It didn't interfere with my work,” Ashba snapped. “You’ve ruined me. My career, my life...all gone.”

“You can't blame me for this. You’re sick, you need help.”

“You were sick once, you needed help. And who gave it to you?” Ashba said, his voice flat and toneless.”

“That’s not fair.”

“Life is unfair. You will find that out very soon.”

Colleen lurched for the knife block, and pulled out the carving knife, holding it in front of her. “You stay away from me.”

Ashba made no effort to approach, nor was he intimidated. He folded his hands in front of him and smiled. “This isn't some low-rent horror movie. I'm not about to attack you. Despite what you have done, I’m still a respectable man.”

“Then why have you come here?”

“To ask you a question.”

“What question?”

“How do you feel?”

The question was unexpected, and she hesitated. “What do you mean?”

Ashba shrugged. “I mean how have you been feeling? Anxious? Lethargic perhaps.”

She didn't answer, even though he was right. Ashba went on.

“How do you feel right now? After all, there is an intruder in your home. A man with nothing to lose who could well hold a grudge. You’re facing off with him, knife in hand, alone and with no help. Surely that would get the adrenaline flowing, cause the heart rate to increase in tempo. Not for you, though, you feel calm. Your heart rate is still at its resting pace, isn't it?”

It was the revelation she had been waiting for. That was why she didn't feel right. Under the circumstances, her heart should have been thundering, but was only beating at its regular tempo. “What have you done to me?” she asked, lowering the knife.

Ashba smiled, enjoying the moment. “Remember in my office, before you ran away to the police and told them what you had found, how we were talking about your new pacemaker and all of its wonderful abilities?”

Colleen nodded.

“Well, as with any software driven piece of equipment, it can be manipulated if someone knew how to do such a thing.”

Colleen dropped the knife on the floor. “What have you done to me?”

“Two days ago, I uploaded a firmware update to your pacemaker. Its programming routine was quite small. Gradually, over a predetermined time which I won't disclose to you here, your heart rate will be brought down, decreased by the machine in your chest until it simply stops beating.”

Colleen didn't know how to react. She was frozen, desperate to find some kind of lie written on Ashba's haggard face and seeing none.

“Don't bother trying to seek help from another doctor, only I can change it. The rest of your medical records have been purged from the hospital records, which means new tests will have to be done. Lengthy tests which far exceed the timeline given to the new firmware. There are backups of course, but by then it will be far too late.”

“Liar. That’s not possible.”

“A test, then. Listen inwardly, listen to your natural rhythm.”

She did as instructed, focusing inwardly, trying to sense her heartbeat. She tried to take her own pulse, but couldn't find the right area of her wrist.

Ashba lunged towards her, throwing his arms into the air. Colleen involuntarily moved back, knocking cutlery from the draining board onto the floor.

“Did I startle you?” Ashba said, glaring at her from across the room. “Or did your heart not react to the shock?”

She knew then that he was telling the truth. Her heart rate should have leaped into her throat when he lurched for her, but it was just as stable as if she were relaxing in front of the TV or with a good book. He saw the recognition on her face and smiled.

“Now, at last, you understand how it feels to know that soon enough, you will lose everything.”

“You wouldn't do that. It’s cruel.”

“And what you did to me isn't?”

“So that’s it, you’re just going to leave me here to die?” 

“Leave you?” Ashba said, flashing his grin at her. “Why on earth would I do that? I'm going to stay here and watch it happen.” He walked over to the door he had forced and pulled it closed, then approached her.

“You back off, you leave me alone,” she said, but her voice was weak and without threat. Ashba stood in front of her, dead eyes glaring.

“You know you’re going to die, don't you, Colleen? You do know you’ve seen your last sunset.”

Her legs shuddered, and she slid down the counter top and sat on the floor.

“It’s okay,” Ashba said. “I'm trained in grief counselling. Not everyone is as lucky as you, Colleen. Some people are too late for a pacemaker, or are too weak for surgery.”

Ashba pulled a chair from the table, wood legs scraping across the wood floor and tracing a line through the puddle of spilled milk. He set it in front of her and sat down, crossing his legs. He checked his watch then looked at her and smiled. “Within the next hour, you will start to feel a shortness of breath. It’s your body’s natural instinct you see. It might recognize that your heart rate is slower than normal, but will sadly be powerless to rectify it.” He leaned over and picked up the carving knife she had dropped on the floor earlier. Colleen stared at the dull blade as it caught the diffuse kitchen light. “Do you believe in the afterlife?” he asked. Colleen didn't answer, her eyes were fixated on the knife blade. Ashba went on regardless. “I’ve often wondered about if anything comes after. If people like me, doctors, paramedics and the like are doing good or evil.”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean that if an afterlife does exist, then you have to accept that God does too. As do Heaven and Hell. If that is the case, then are we not going against his will by saving lives that he has chosen to join him in the kingdom of heaven?”

Colleen looked towards the door, then back at Ashba.

“I wouldn't run if I were you,” Ashba said. He pointed at her chest with the knife. “Your heart is already operating below optimum tempo. Any exertion, any activity will cause catastrophic failure of the system and result in instant death, so please, get comfortable. You won't be going anywhere for a while.”

She relaxed again, leaning the back of her head on the cabinet behind her.

“Good, now back to my original question. What do you think?”

“I can't remember what you asked,” she moaned, then started to cry.

“The afterlife. Heaven and hell. Do you believe in it?”

She shook her head. “I won't answer that.”

“What harm would it do? I mean, soon enough you will find out. I just wonder what your thoughts are on it. Could it be true that when your heart slows down and stops, that you will see a tunnel of light, and at the end of it those who have already departed will be waiting? Or are you more of the opinion that when we die, it's over. A flick of the light switch, an eternal dreamless sleep.”

“Why are you doing this to me? How is it even possible?”

Ashba smiled. He was cutting a notch out of the seat between his legs with the knife. “A question in two parts. The why should be fairly obvious, even to you. The how is not as complicated as you might think.” He looked at her, waiting for a response that never came. He went on. “The pacemaker inside you is run by software. The software itself at its most basic is code. A computer language made up one ones and zeroes. Remarkable really to think of all the people out there who are able to live because of those numbers. Pacemakers, dialysis machines, x-ray machines, almost all modern technology is powered by those two little numbers.”

He grinned and leaned closer. “Your pacemaker, as you may recall, was a new model. I was one of the doctors involved in developing the product for maximum efficiency. During the early days of testing, several software patches, or firmware were sent to me by the product manufacturers to use in our static models. There were patches to simulate everything from arrhythmia to high altitude exertion. The idea was to test the unit under every conceivable condition. All I had to do was go into the archives and find the suitable software patch for my needs and overwrite the default settings.”

“Without operating?” Colleen said, unable to take it all in.

“Without operating,” Ashba repeated. “It’s not that difficult. Cardiologists all over the world wirelessly transmit software updates to pacemakers all the time. It’s routine.”

“So somebody could re-overwrite what you did to me,” she replied, seeing a flicker of hope, which Ashba shot down.

“Sadly not. As a precaution against such a thing, yours has been set to read-only. Unfortunately, only the installation of a brand new unit will help you now, which we both know is never going to happen.”

“You’re a monster. I'm glad I told the police about what I saw.”

“And in doing so have ruined innocent lives.” Ashba fired back, his eyes alive with hatred.

Although she knew she shouldn't, the anger exploded from her. “Innocent? You’re not innocent. You’re a disgusting excuse for a human being. Soon you’ll be a killer as well as a paedophile. Don't try to tell me you’re innocent.”

“I wasn't referring to me,” Ashba said, standing and walking towards where she sat. He was pointing the knife at her, the blade inches from her eyeball. “You think I don't know what the consequences are of my actions? You think I’ll allow them to put me on trial, send me to prison?” He shook his head and crouched so they were now face to face. “I’ve made my contingency plan, don't you worry about that. You will go first but I’ll be right behind you. I know my life is as over as yours. The innocent people I'm referring to are my family. My wife. My children. How can they live with what you did? How can they get over the pain you've caused?”

She could see the fury in his face, and he was speaking through gritted teeth. A tear rolled down his cheek. His grip on the knife was turning his knuckles white, and she was sure he wasn't going to wait for the pacemaker to slow her heart down. He was going to kill her right then and there. She reacted without thinking, instinct taking over. She batted the knife arm away from her face with her left hand, at the same time bringing her right hand up into his face, palm first with as much force as she could muster. In the quiet of the house, the noise was deafening as his nose shattered and blood ejected out of his face. He tried to lean on the chair behind him for balance, but it slid across the wood floor and he went down hard.

Colleen scrambled to her feet, waiting to see if she would be struck down by the defective machinery in her chest. The front door was down a long, narrow hallway and seemed like it was a thousand miles away. She started towards it, but could already hear the enraged grunts of Ashba behind her. She realized that the news crews that had been hounding her for the last week could well now be her saviours. She didn't think about what was going on behind her, or even that she might be wasting her time. All she was sure of was that she didn't want to die, and she was determined to fight as long as she could. She fumbled with the keys which were still in the lock. She was sure something would go wrong, that they would break or fall out, but the key turned smoothly and the door unlocked. She wrenched open the door and stepped outside, much to the surprise of the half dozen or so reporters and camera crew who were waiting. She screamed out, but it was cut short. Ashba grabbed her from behind and pulled her back into the house, kicking the door closed. Even so, the reporters had seen it. One crew had even got it on film. By the time Ashba had dragged Colleen back to the kitchen, the police had already been called.