Fan the Flames (9 page)

“If you are thinking about a way to let me down easily, you better forget it,” he warned, softly. “I wasn’t kidding when I told you that I wouldn’t let you go. You made a decision when you let me make love to you tonight, and you aren’t going to run from it now. We can work out the details later, but one thing is absolutely sure. This wasn’t a one-night stand. If I was determined enough to be with you that I answered your personal ad on that stupid website, I’m not going to give you up now that I had a taste of you.”

Chapter Sixteen

Why did I open my big mouth
?

Brody pulled into his driveway, cursing himself again for letting it slip that he knew about her personal ad on the website. But that wasn’t what caused him to feel like a world-class asshole. Why did he hurl those hurtful words to her? She might have forgiven him about the website, but what happened afterwards.

The look on her face once the words had left his mouth had been one of hurt and betrayal. She wouldn’t even listen to him explain as she kicked him out of her bed. He wanted to tell her the real reasons he had been eavesdropping on her conversation all those weeks ago, but she wouldn’t listen to him.

She accused him of doing it as a joke to get back at her.

“I can’t believe you were listening to my conversation,” Ja’Nael screamed at him as she slid across the bed, away from him, wrapping the sheet around her naked body. “What were you going to do if I agreed to a date with you? Were you going to have me show up and then you have me there waiting for hours?”

“No, I wouldn’t have done that to you. I—”

“Stop right there before you tell me another lie,” she yelled, getting off the bed. “I can’t believe I fell for this. I guess I’m destined to be a mark for the Wagner brothers. First Timothy, and now you. I knew I shouldn’t have trusted you, but I wanted to step out of the box and try something new. I was doing just fine being the way I was, but I listened to Kelcie and look what happened.

“Baby, I care about you. I know it seems sudden, but the moment I saw you standing there in Reid’s classroom, I felt the need to get to know you better.”

“Sure you did,” she said with a sneer, waving her hand at him. “Out of all of the women around town throwing themselves at you day after day, you wanted me.”

Hurrying out of his side of the bed, Brody snatched his pants up off the floor and slipped them back on. He took a step toward her, but she moved across the room, away from him. “Don’t you dare come any closer to me,” she said. “Hell, I don’t even know why you are still here. Get out of my house!”

“Ja’Nael, will you stop being unreasonable. What I did wasn’t even that bad. Hell, you wouldn’t have even known about my private message if I hadn’t told you. You keep saying again and again that you aren’t that insecure teenage girl my brother bullied all those years ago. So why are you acting like you still are since you arrived back to town? It’s past time you got over it and stop holding his actions against me. God, grow up and move on with your life. I know for sure that Timothy never gave you another thought after you ran away to New York. Maybe he decided to single you out because he knew that he could do it to you.”

Ja’Nael gasped and stumbled backward, hitting her back against the wall. Pangs of guilt washed over him the second their argument was over. She stared at him, a heartbroken expression etched across her pretty face. The smiling, laughing woman he had dinner with hours ago was gone, replaced by a woman who just got ripped about by his words. Ja’Nael looked at him as though she would never trust him again.

“You need to leave. I don’t want to see your face,” she uttered, holding back tears.

“No, sweetheart,” Brody said, shaking his head. “I won’t leave... Damn, I didn’t mean it the way—”

She crossed her arms over her breasts and shook her head. “No. Nothing you say to me will take those words away. Get out! Now!”

“Ja’Nael, you have to know I didn’t…couldn’t ever really believe…”

“Will you stop?” she hissed. “You said those words to me because you believe every single one. I’m going to the bathroom to take a shower, and when I come out you better be gone.” Spinning away from him, Ja’Nael walked the short distance to her bathroom and closed the door behind her.

Staring out the window of his car, Brody watched as a few raindrops hit his windshield before it came down in buckets. He had never felt this alone since his father died when he was a kid. A few hours ago, he had everything he had ever wanted wrapped up in his arms. Now they were empty and aching for Ja’Nael.

Things weren’t over between them. They couldn’t be. She was in his blood. They’d shared magic tonight in her bedroom. He was determined to make her admit it as well. The way she stared at him with tears held in her eyes almost brought him to his knees. It was a feeling he
n
ever
wanted to experience again. It was like an unexpected punch in the stomach.

If he could run into a burning building and save other people’s lives from danger, it shouldn’t be that hard to re-claim the heart of the woman he was falling in love with. He only prayed Ja’Nael left a tiny piece of it open for him to sneak back into.

Chapter Seventeen

Moving around her living room, Ja’Nael searched every inch of it for a third time, looking for her romance book, and she was beginning to believe it wasn’t even inside her house. Yet, she couldn’t remember the last time she had the thing. She needed something to get her mind off…him.

Nearly three weeks had passed since her blow up with Brody. What in God’s name had been wrong with her that night? She couldn’t even blame liquor for her lapse in judgment. She had willingly accepted him into her bed, and the things she allowed Brody to do to her body were still fresh in her mind.

How could she have been so weak? She played right into his hands from the very beginning without even knowing it. He played and stroked her like a finely tuned instrument, and not once did she tell him to stop.

You know the reason you didn’t do it, her mind tossed at her. Brody got to you. He worked his way past your distant outer shell and pulled out the loving woman you truly are.

Damn
.

Why had she allowed herself to start to feel anything for the hunky firefighter? She should have kept him at arm’s length, but it was so hard to do when he flashed her that smile. In addition, Reid had melted her heart the second she laid eyes on him. He was the cutest little boy in the world. Yesterday, he ran into class with another gift for her. It wasn’t a plastic apple for her desk like last time, though. It was a sterling silver bracelet with a World’s Best Teacher’s charm tangling from it. She knew who the real person was behind the expensive gift. Yet, instead of hurting Reid’s feeling by not taking it, she gave him a hug then slipped it into her purse.

Right after school was over, she had gone to the post office, bought a box, and mailed it back to Brody with a note. She made sure he understood not to give her any more presents through Reid. Of course, he couldn’t let it go and sent it back with a note saying:

What are you going to do if Reid asks you about the bracelet?

I think you should keep it just in case.

Yours always,

Brody

She hated to admit that his words had hit home. What if Reid did ask her about his gift? No matter how angry she was at Brody, she never wanted to hurt his nephew’s feelings.

Falling down on the couch, she ran her hands over her face and sighed. Despite everything, she missed him. The way when he flirted with her his eyes would light up and make her feel like the only woman in the world.

Ja’Nael remembered how she had cried herself to sleep that night after their fight. She tried to blame it all on his words, but that wasn’t the entire truth. She might have spent a little too much of her life living in the past, thinking about Timothy. He only had the power that she gave to him. He didn’t deserve any more space in her head.

How was she ever going to become the woman she needed to be if any part of that seventeen-year-old girl was hiding away in her subconscious?

* * * * *

Standing outside of Ja’Nael’s door, Brody turned the novel over in his hands. He should have given it back to her the day after she left it at the park, but he couldn’t do it. He always felt that if he held on to it a little longer, it would come in handy and today was that day.

The Monday after their blow up, he had taken Reid to preschool to only find out that Ja’Nael would be out sick for the week. Not seeing his favorite teacher sitting behind the desk, Reid had thrown an award-winning tantrum. It had been so bad that Brody ended up taking him back home and called Tasia to baby sit him. He knew better than to take Reid back, so he kept him out the entire week.

Of course, when Ja’Nael came back the following week, his nephew was on cloud nine. While he was living in his own personal hell of his own causing, she wouldn’t look at him from the moment he walked into the classroom.

Somehow, she found ways to constantly have someone else there so they were never alone. The agony of being so close to her but not being able to hold and kiss her drove him crazy with need until Brody felt as if he were losing his mind.

Last night he determined it was time for one of them to act like an adult.

He dropped off Reid at Mason’s for their weekly Saturday play date and made a beeline over to her house. Now, here he was, standing outside her door, holding a book as his only option to get to her. If this didn’t work, he was all out of ideas. Raising his hand, he punched the doorbell and waited.

“Wait a minute. I’m coming,” Ja’Nael yelled from the other side.

He quickly sent up a silent prayer that she wouldn’t slam the door in his face.

Seconds later, the heavy door swung open and he was staring into the face of the woman he had fallen hard for.

The door started to close, but he slapped his palm against it and begged, “Sweetheart, don’t slam the door. I have something to tell you. Please give me the chance to fix what I messed up. You can’t keep shutting me out. Besides, I think I have something that belongs to you.” He held up the book for her to see and waited, lowering his hand from the door so she had a choice.

Her gaze darted over to the book before it inched its way back to his face. Brody stared down at Ja’Nael and waited to see what her next move would be. Whatever it was, it would determine if he had a chance to win her back. His heart leaped in his chest when Ja’Nael stepped back and waved him inside before taking the book out of his hand.

“You might as well come in since you’re here.”

Once he walked inside, she closed the door behind him and locked it, resting her back against it and holding the book against her chest. Brody allowed his gaze to travel over her body. A body that he knew so intimately. He saw it in his dreams every night.

“I don’t think we have anything to fix. We weren’t…”

“Stop right there,” Brody said, walking back to her. “We did have something. I won’t let you lie to me. You felt it just as much as I did.”

She held out her hand, pressing it against his chest so he couldn’t come any closer to her. “You’re wrong. A man who thinks I wanted to get bullied or mistreated has no place in my life or heart.”

Brody gently moved her hand off his chest as he removed the book from the other one. He laid it on the stand by the door and pulled Ja’Nael into his arms. “I shouldn’t have said any of those things to you. I was wrong. If I could go back in time and change our first night together, I would, but I can’t. Please forgive me. I’m lost without you.”

When she didn’t say anything, he dropped his voice and said in just above a whisper, “Even Reid has noticed that there is something wrong with me. He asked me if I was mad at you because he didn’t see us kissing anymore. Don’t you miss kissing me?” He brushed his lips against Ja’Nael’s and smiled when she didn’t move away from him.

Raising his head, he stared down into her cautious eyes. “You do know that if you tell me no, I won’t believe you. I don’t how it happened so fast, but I’ve fallen for you. The time we were apart killed me. Ja’Nael, you were all I thought about. I couldn’t get the hurt look in your eyes out of my mind. Will you give me another chance? Do you know that I won’t be able to function without you at my side? I was an asshole to you, but please forgive me.

“I will do anything to get you back, but don’t push me out of your life. I can’t go back home to Reid and tell him that his favorite teacher is still mad at me for being stupid.”

He knew Ja’Nael cared about him. He saw it in her eyes, in how they grew softer when he mentioned Reid’s name and his love for her, but was it enough for her to give him another chance?

“You’re a wonderful uncle, and Reid will love you no matter what. But I can’t forget. I’m not able to forgive you,” she told him. “I need a man who will take my side. Timothy hurt me all those years ago, and for me to fall for his brother was a huge step on my part. But the second you got mad, my past got tossed back in my face. I can’t have a man like that in my life.”

The words cut at him. Closing his eyes, he blew out a breath. “I didn’t mean anything that came out of my mouth that night.”

Pulling away from him, she tried walking around him, but he grabbed her by the arm and brought her back. “Baby, please. I’m so sorry. I never meant to hurt you. Give me a chance to make it up to you. Can you really tell me that you haven’t missed me these past couple of weeks?”

“Of course, I missed you,” she finally admitted. “As much as I didn’t want to, I thought about you at the oddest times of the day. The night we made love was the best of my life. I had never felt so special with another man before.”

Brody smiled as he lowered his head. Gently, he kissed Ja’Nael as he ran his hands up and down her back. The feeling of having her in his arms again was wonderful. The kiss seemed to go on forever until he finally was the one who pulled away.

He pressed his forehead against hers. “How can I make you see that I’m the only man for you? I will never love another woman the way I love you. I know we have a lot to overcome because of our past, but I will work every day to show you. I care about you more than anything else in the world.

“Nothing compares to being this close to your sexy, curvy body, but your loving heart is what captured mine. Are you able to forget about that night and allow me to keep my promises to you?”

Ja’Nael reached up and touched his cheek.

Turning his head, he planted a kiss in the palm of her hands. “I’ll prove I’m worthy of your love.”

“I won’t make it easy on you,” she said with a grin. “I can already think of several things you might need to do. Are you ready for them?”

Growling low in his throat, Brody grabbed Ja’Nael’s plump ass with his hands, jerking her to his body. “I’m not above taking direction, especially when it’s coming from a very beautiful woman that I’m totally in love with. So, all I can say is bring it on, Ms. Haughton, and I can prove to you that I’m truly a man of my word.”