Fantasyland 02 The Golden Dynasty (65 page)

Oh shit.

When I’d cleared him, I came away from the
wall and started to back toward the door.

Lahn came at me again. “She withholds her
xaxsah. She withholds her golden honey. She withholds her claws.
She withholds her spirit. And, since she bore my children, she
withholds even her
time.
”

“Uh…” I mumbled again.

I hit door and didn’t even get close to
finding the knob. Lahn moved fast, I was up, across the room and on
my back in the bed, Lahn on top of me. I was winded, his face was
in my face and he was beyond furious, he was seriously
fucking
pissed
,
him
and
the brutal,
golden spirit that was shining in his eyes.

And he was something else. Something I
didn’t get. Something I couldn’t read. Something that didn’t belong
in his eyes. It was wrong there.

Cataclysmically wrong.

“I will not take you by force for I know you
will use it as well as reason never to forgive me and now I know it
to be true, from the name your father called me, that you never
will.”

“Lahn –” I whispered again as what I saw in
his eyes, held by his spirit, started to dawn.

He talked over me. “But you should know
before I leave you to be my queen only for our people, my wife only
to be mother to Tunahn and Isis and I let you go, that I suffered
for my mistake, I suffered for it greatly when I found you left
me.”

My heart thumped harder just as my belly
melted.

Yes, I knew what that was in his eyes.

Defeat.

Oh God.

I had to stop this.
Now.

“Honey –” I tried speaking softly, using an
endearment he liked as I gently put my hands on him but I failed to
break through.

“
I spent five months agonizing that I had
lost you forever, haunted in sleep and in wake with the vision of
your spirit fading to nothing in your eyes, knowing
I’d
crushed it to death and
I’d
forced you to escape me. Me,
your king, your warrior, your Lahn,
yours
, in the end being no better than Dortak.”

Oh
God.

“Lahn –” I started as my body softened under
his and my arms wrapped around him.

“
And knowing with every day that passed
when you didn’t return to me,
you
were never going to find your way back to me. And
despairing as each day moved into the next with no word from Karrim
that
I
wouldn’t find
a way to bring you home.”

I slid my hands to his front and up to curl
them light around his neck. “Baby, listen to –”

“My golden doe, gone. My child with her.
Never to see her heavy with my seed, never to look upon my warrior
or golden daughter, never again to feel her body at sleep in our
bed next to mine.”

“Lahn, seriously, honey, please listen
–”

“Then Karrim finds a witch to bring you home
to me, we give her trunks of gold only for you to come back
broken.”

God! He needed to
shut the fuck up
so I could
fucking
talk!

“
Lahn!” I snapped urgently, my fingers
digging into his neck but I
still
didn’t break through.

“
And
I
did
that,
I
broke you and
the only hint you gift me with that there is a possibility my
golden goddess lives on somewhere inside is when you found the
strength to deliver upon me our children.”

Jeez, when my man got on a tangent, there
was no shutting him the fuck up!

“Lahn, damn it –!” I shouted in his face but
it was like I didn’t make a noise as he kept talking over me.

“But still, you remain lost, never to come
back to me.”

And that was it. I’d had enough.

And to communicate that, with a mighty
heave, I planted my feet in the bed, arched my back and shoved his
shoulders, pushing him to his back but going with him so I was
straddling his hips, my fingers curled into his shoulders, my torso
pressed to his and my face an inch away.

“
Will you…
shut… up?
” I yelled, his mouth closed and he scowled up at
me. “Jeez!” I cried, looking over his head before I looked back at
him. “The drama. God!”

“Circe –” he growled but I snapped, “Quiet,
Lahn, I’m talking now.”

He closed his mouth and scowled again.

I glared.

Then I spoke. “You upset me, broke my
heart, okay, I think you get that. That’s coming through loud and
clear, big guy. You hurt me. But seriously, I mean, the shit I was
telling you, it was whacked. Totally unbelievable. So I get that
too. But
I’m
an idiot and
I lead with my heart and do stupid shit
all the freaking time.
And I got so upset because I
loved you so much it hurt so badly, what you said, that I did it
again. I acted before I thought. I followed my heart, which hurt,
and I did something really freaking stupid. So, okay, Pop calls you
an asshole because he knows things didn’t start too great but… clue
in, Lahn. He
left
me here. He
knows I love you and he wants me to be happy. Yeesh!” I sat up,
tipped my head back and looked at the ceiling. “For someone as
unbelievably clev –”

I didn’t finish because I was on my back and
my body was jolted violently because my sarong was yanked clean
off.

Oh man.

I focused on his heated eyes just in time
for my undies to be torn away… yep,
torn away,
my body jerking again as they went.

Oh
man
.

“
Lahn,” I breathed as he rolled on top of
me, I was already turned on because I suddenly found myself naked
under my king’s fantastic, heavy, warm body
and
from the hot look in his eyes.

His big hands trailed swiftly down the backs
of my thighs then they yanked up. “You forgive me,” he growled.

“Uh… yeah, awhile ago. I’m just a –”

I didn’t finish because his mouth took
mine in a searing kiss, a wet one, a deep one, a long one and a
very,
very
hot
one.

Oh yeah.

Yeah, yeah,
yeah.

He tore his mouth from mine and I finished
my sentence on a dazed, breathless, “
Dork
.”

“I do not know what that is, my doe, but I
do not care,” he whispered against my lips as his fingers slid
through the wetness gathering between my legs and then his lips
slid to my ear. “I will try to be gentle but since I took my first
at the age of twelve, I have never waited this long. Nowhere near.
I do not think I can.”

I pressed into his hand, tugged at the ties
on his hides, turned my head and whispered in his ear, “Don’t
bother with gentle, honey, I just want to feel you again.”

He didn’t wait to be asked twice and there
he was.

Oh yeah.

God, I
loved
the feel of my husband.

“Yes,” I whispered and that was all I could
say, his mouth came back to mine, his hips drove in, hard, fast,
uncontrolled, my thighs pressed tight to his sides as one arm held
fast around his muscled back and the other hand pulled out his
plait and slid into his my gorgeous hair.

I knew he struggled, I felt it but my Lahn,
like always, held on until it hit me, hot, hard and piercing, and I
cried out into his mouth, my limbs tightening then he let go, his
growled release mingling with mine.

Oh
yeah.

I was right there, right where I needed to
be.

I was home.

After we both recovered, Lahn stayed planted
deep as his mouth trailed to my ear.

“You love me,” he whispered there and my
limbs tightened.

“Yeah,” I whispered back.

“Say it,” he growled and I closed my eyes
and turned my head so my lips were at his ear.

“I love you, baby.”

I barely got the words out before his head
came up and his mouth came back down on mine. This kiss was slow,
gentle and sweet as well as wet and deep.

When he broke the connection of our mouths,
he rested his forehead on mine and my hand slid from his hair to
cup his bearded jaw.

“I’m sorry, honey,” I said quietly and he
closed his eyes, the pads of my fingers dug in and he opened them
again. “I left it too long and the longer I left it, the harder
–”

“Okay, my Circe,” he cut me off, tipped his
chin to touch his mouth to mine, he rolled to his back so I was on
top and his arms were tight around me. “Okay,” he whispered in my
ear.

Okay.

Man, I loved it when he said that.

Yep, I was a dork.

But I could not let it go at that. He was my
Lahn and he deserved more so I lifted my head and one of his hands
came up to pull my hair back and hold it bunched at the back of my
head.

“I’m glad you think it’s okay, baby, but I
need to know you understand I’m sorry,” I said softly.

“I understand,” Lahn returned, his voice as
gentle as his handsome face.

I licked my lips and shared, “I missed you,”
I closed my eyes, tipped my head and dropped it so my forehead was
on his and then I opened them, saw the warm softness in his dark
ones and continued, “I missed you when I was gone and I missed you
when you brought me back.”

Lahn didn’t reply but his arm around me
squeezed.

My hand still at his jaw, I swept my thumb
over his beautiful lips as I said quietly, “I don’t want to be
anywhere but here.”

His eyes closed slowly and his hand in my
hair tipped my face so I would touch my mouth against his then he
released me and I lifted my head away just an inch.

“Are we good?” I whispered.

“Yes, Circe, good,” he whispered back.

My thumb swept his lips again and then moved
back over his cheekbone as my eyes watched.

“Linas, kah Lahnahsahna,” Lahn demanded
quietly and my gaze shifted back to his. His eyes were warm, his
mouth soft and his voice softer when his hand in my hair slid
around to my face and his thumb pressed lightly under my eye.
“There she is.”

I felt my smile wobble as my lungs squeezed
and my eyes got wet.

“Did my Lahn resurrect her?” I asked softly
and his hand slid back into my hair, pulling me down for another
lip touch before letting me move away an inch.

And that was when I saw
his
brutal, fierce golden spirit
burning bright in his eyes for me to see and I knew his answer
before he gave it to me.

“Yes, my Circe, she burns bright again for
me.”

“
Dohno,” I whispered then kept whispering,
“Now I know what I suspected to be true. My husband
is
a god. He can do
anything.
”

I caught his grin before he rolled me to my
back.

Then he muttered in my ear, “Let us see if
this is true.”

“Okay,” I agreed readily and listened to his
chuckle as it rumbled against my skin.

Oh yeah.

I was home.

* * * * *

I watched Lahn walk back into our room after
putting down Tunahn who I just fed.

Night had fallen but candlelight lit the
room softly. If I was lucky and fell asleep quickly, I could maybe
get four hours in.

Lahn got under the covers, stretched out
beside me, shoved an arm under me and curled me to his long, warm,
hard side.

Okay, fuck that. No way I was sleeping.

I lifted up on an elbow, rested my hand on
his chest and looked into his dark, beloved eyes.

“Do you make trainee warriors buff your
saddle?” I asked and he blinked.

“What?”

“Trainee warriors. Do you make them buff
your saddle?”

His mouth twitched. “Warriors in training
learn and do many things, kah Lahnahsahna. Buffing saddles is not
one of them.”

My eyes drifted to his shoulder and I
muttered, “Oh.”

“
Something they
do
learn,” he went on and my eyes moved back to his,
“is not to waste time performing deeds that are not worth
performing. Like buffing saddles.”

I started giggling. Lahn’s arm gave me a
squeeze as his lips tipped up into a smile.

I rested my chest into his, my arm curving
around him, my face getting closer.

“Did you really lose your virginity when you
were twelve?” I whispered and his eyes immediately shuttered so I
shook his body with my arm. “Lahn.”

“Meena,” he said shortly.

“No joke?” I asked, eyes wide with surprise,
he studied me then he shook his head.

“No joke.”

“Wow,” I breathed. “That’s kinda young isn’t
it?”

He kept studying me. Then he stated, “A
warrior’s trainer will decide when a warrior is ready to advance
through all facets of his training. My trainer decided I was ready
to take a woman at twelve. So I took a Xacto at twelve.”

I felt his gaze sharpen on my face when he
said the word “Xacto” so I told him quickly, “Baby, I know you’re
not going to step out on me. If a guy like you who needs it as
often as you do and the
way
you
do can hang on for eight months for me, I have no worries about you
going to the Xacto.”

“No, my Circe, you have no worries about me
going to the Xacto,” he said quietly.

I smiled at him.

Lahn smiled back.