Fascination (9 page)

‘Whereabouts in England do you come from?’ Dona Lucia inquired in tones of icy politeness.

Hydee told her, wondering if her voice sounded as strange to her listener as it did to her own ears. Arminda was talking to Carlos, who, having brought her a drink, bent to hand it to her, and their heads seemed to Hydee to be far too close. They were speaking quietly, with only a murmur crossing the room to reach Hydee. Arminda’s eyes were faintly accusing but wide and appealing, too.

It was another ten minutes before the next guests arrived, and Hydee had in some measure calmed down by then, having made a tremendous effort to pull herself together. Her subconscious had warned her that unless she was to appear as totally characterless, she must keep up some kind of a front. She felt that Carlos ought to help her, but on the arrival of four additional friends he merely introduced her and went back to Arminda; he perched himself on the arm of her chair until the arrival of Isobella, who had come without her husband, the excuse being that he was unwell and had decided at the last minute to go to bed.

Isobella seated herself next to Hydee on the cushioned sofa and waited for her drink to be served by Bento. Carlos, from his place in the middle of the room, watched his sister closely. Isobella began to chat to Hydee and to smile, and had she not been warned by Gasper, Hydee would have been at a loss to account for the change in the woman’s attitude towards her. As Gasper had predicted, Isobella did not intend to let her brother see just how much she disliked her new sister-in-law. Later, however, she said softly, an invidious note in her voice, ‘Well, do you now accept that you’re totally out-of-place here?’

‘I’m Carlos’s wife,’ returned Hydee stiffly through whitened lips. Isobella’s answer to this was merely a sneer.

Ines and her husband, Francisco, arrived and were formally presented to Hydee, who realised at once that Isobella had been talking to them, because their eyes swept her with contempt. A nanny, they were thinking—a servant and yet a relative.

Other guests arrived, including one of Carlos’s aunts, an overweight woman with silver hair piled high on her head and a face as arrogant as the rest. Her handclasp was damp and limp.

‘So you’re the English girl we’ve all been brought here to see.’ Her pale protuberant eyes slid with cold hauteur from the top of Hydee’s head to her feet, and a deep sigh escaped the woman before, turning away, she spoke to one of the other guests, saying, ‘Ah, Antonia, how are you? And how are your charming children?’

So much for the snub. How many more would come her way before the evening was out? wondered Hydee.

But at last, just when she was telling herself that he would not come, Gasper arrived, his tall striking figure clad in an off-white suit with a frilled shirt and a black bow tie. He stood for a moment by the door, his eyes scanning the room until they settled on Hydee’s flushed face. With no more than a nod to his cousin, he strode through the brilliant throng of guests until he reached her side.

‘Hydee,’ he greeted her, his ready smile succeeding in its intent to lift her spirits and bring a swift, winning response to lips that had been quivering only seconds ago. His hands came out to clasp hers; he bent to brush her cheek with his lips. ‘How charming you look!’ he exclaimed. ‘Blue is definitely your colour.’ His eyes met hers in a steady and reassuring gaze. Her own eyes, limpid and appealing, thanked him, but she spoke, too, saying with a dignity and assurance she had lacked from the moment of the appearance of the first two guests, ‘Thank you, Gasper. I’m so glad to see you arrive.’

‘I’m flattered, my dear.’ For a fleeting second he let his eyes dart to Isobella’s face, and then, deliberately turning his back on her, and keeping hold of Hydee’s hand, he led her over to a vacant couch and they sat down.

Bento came at once, speaking in Portuguese. Gasper answered in English, haughtily, as if admonishing Bento for not being more polite to his mistress.

‘Dry sherry, Bento.’ Gasper looked at Hydee. ‘For you?’

‘I left my drink over there.’

‘Bento will get you another.’

His smile was inordinately attractive, filling his eyes with warmth.

‘Has she said anything to you?’ he wanted to know when Bento had gone, and he inclined his head in Isobella’s direction so that there could be no question as to whom he meant.

‘She’s… insulting, Gasper….’ Hydee’s voice trailed off because she knew she ought not to be saying such things to Gasper; it was disloyal to Carlos, who seemed to be quite fond of his sister.

‘In what way?’ asked Gasper softly. ‘Tell me about it.’

She shook her head. ‘It doesn’t matter—’ she began, but he interrupted her.

‘Certainly it matters. Carlos didn’t bring you here to be insulted by his relatives. She’s poison, always has been if she can’t get all her own way. She set her heart on a match between her friend Arminda and Carlos, and it hasn’t come off. She’s seething but helpless.’ Gasper leant closer because Arminda’s mother had sauntered over and was standing rather close, for no apparent reason. ‘Isobella never lets anything rest, and she’ll continue to insult you. Don’t let her acid tongue upset you,’ he advised, his mouth close to her ear. ‘And always remember, Hydee, that you have at least one friend in this family—me. Tomorrow, when Carlos is away, I shall call for you and show you my home. Come and visit me just whenever you like.’

She nodded, happy at his words about being her friend. ‘I feel so much better now that you’re here,’ she confessed, giving him a lovely smile and then letting it fade when she noticed her husband’s expression as her eyes caught his. He was staring at her with a scowl on his hard, inflexible face, his darkly brilliant eyes appearing almost black as they stared piercingly into hers before moving with a kind of insidious slowness to the face of his cousin. Hydee lowered her lashes, and the next moment Gasper was speaking and she promptly forgot the rather frightening look her husband had given her.

At the table she had Gasper sitting opposite her, and they chatted like old friends while many arrogant and disapproving eyes looked on.

Although Carlos spoke to her often, bringing her into the conversation with a smile on his lips, she was profoundly conscious of the fact that his main interest lay with Arminda, who was sitting a little farther along the table from Gasper, and it was to her pale face that his eyes would wander over and over again. Watching Isobella, Hydee noticed the look of satisfaction on her arrogant face, then the sneer of contempt that would invariably replace it if her eyes should alight on Hydee. Gasper was her prop throughout the entire evening, and when it was nearing its end and most of the guests were departing, he managed to get her alone while Carlos was in the hall seeing some of his guests away.

‘Remember, I shall call for you tomorrow. Is Carlos planning to buy you a car?’

‘I can’t drive,’ she answered, feeling lighthearted at the idea of going out with Gasper the following day. She was not quite sure what her feelings for him were, but she did know that gratitude loomed large.

‘You must have a car. I’ll teach you to drive.’

‘Will Carlos let me have one, do you think?’

‘Ask him; it’s not an unreasonable request.’ He smiled down into her upturned face, an odd expression in his eyes. ‘I’ll see you tomorrow,’ he said again, and moved away from her as Carlos reentered the room.

***

Hydee was so tired that she merely said a swift good night to her husband and went up to her room, to pace for a few minutes, going over in her mind the events of the evening, recapturing the embarrassments and the pleasures. The latter were provided entirely by Gasper, who had known she would be out of her depth and had come prepared to help her through the ordeal. He had done much to smooth her way, for on the whole she had not been sought out for conversation by many of those present. Arminda had come over for a few words but had soon found a more acceptable companion to talk to; the girl’s mother had sniffed as she passed her on her way to socialise with Isobella. As for Carlos, he had been busy, naturally, moving from one group of guests to another, and Hydee could understand his not having much time for her, other than when making the initial introductions. Well, it was all over… until Christmas, when there would be another gathering, and this time the relatives would stay for several days. Another ordeal, but she felt sure that Gasper would be there again to help her through it.

She undressed, showered, and wandered from the bathroom into the bedroom. She was just about to pick up her plain cotton nightgown and throw it over her head when, to her amazement, the communicating door opened and Carlos strode in. The angry scowl darkening his face told her instantly that he intended taking her to task over her familiarity with Gasper.

He stopped abruptly, his expression undergoing a change as he saw her naked body. Burning colour flooded into Hydee’s cheeks as embarrassment enveloped her, but she could not move to get the nightgown. It was as if she just had to stand there, her hips slender, seductive, her breasts round and virginal above a tiny waist.

‘I’m sorry….’ Carlos’ voice came at last, filtering the deep silence. ‘I thought you’d have been in bed. You said you were tired.’ Instead of leaving, he came farther into the room, and she did move then, grabbing the nightgown from the back of a chair and getting into it. His eyes watched her every move, and in that moment when he was staring so interestedly, she knew she was in love with him. ‘Go away!’ she cried. ‘Why did you come in here? You’ve no right!’

He came close, and she stopped, and suddenly she was crying.

‘Hydee,’ he said, surprising her by his gentleness, ‘there’s no need to cry.’ Taking her hand, he led her to the bed and made her sit down. ‘Hydee, don’t cry like that,’ he commanded. ‘Stop it, I say!’ He sat down beside her, his strong arm coming about her, and she turned, surprised at his action.

‘I’m… s-sorry,’ she choked, lifting the hem of her nightgown to dry her eyes. ‘I suppose it was the… the ordeal of tonight.’

‘It was an ordeal?’ His voice tightened all at once. ‘You were happy enough with Gasper,’ he reminded her brusquely.

‘I needed him, and you must know it.’ Carlos avoided making a response to the implied question in her words.

‘You’re obviously unhappy,’ he observed. ‘You feel you made a mistake in marrying me?’

Hydee lifted her head; sheer desolation encompassed her at the knowledge of her hopeless love, and in her misery she said, ‘Yes, I
am
beginning to think I made a mistake in marrying you.’

‘Already?’ He held her from him, his eyes troubled, yet not deeply so, and she wondered if she had been convincing. ‘Perhaps the dinner party wasn’t a good idea after all.’

‘They were all filled with contempt for me and they made no attempt to hide it,’ she cried. ‘I’m a nobody, but at least I was taught manners. Your family has none!’

Carlos’s aristocratic face coloured.

She guessed at his anger while at the same time sensing a reluctance to betray that anger at this time, when she was so distressed. And she recalled her assertion to Gasper that Carlos was kind to her. Yes, she had to admit that up till now he had been kind, giving her full rein with the children, never admonishing her or finding the least fault with her work. He had made her a generous allowance, had told her she must say when she felt she needed a rest from the children. He reminded her that Caterina was quite capable of looking after them temporarily, so there would be no problem if ever she wanted to do a little sightseeing. In any case, he had declared, she must certainly take a trip to Lisbon one day. He had made no mention of accompanying her, and she had not expected him to, but he certainly did not intend to put anything in the way of her having a little pleasure trip now and then.

‘The children are tiring and I know it,’ he had once said, ‘and, therefore, you must tell me whenever you feel like a rest.’

His arm was about her, the strongly comforting scent of his maleness affecting her profoundly, and without thinking, she nestled close against his chest and her hand stole automatically to his shoulder. She thought he stiffened, but when she lifted her face, there was nothing in his expression to denote repugnance; on the contrary, his eyes were compassionate and there was a strange light in them that set her pulses racing in a way she could not understand. His voice was infinitely gentle when at length he spoke, and he drew her even closer, his hand almost tender on her hair.

‘You didn’t mean it just now when you said you were beginning to regret marrying me?’ he said, this time appearing to be a little troubled about it.

‘I don’t fit in here,’ she quavered, a sob in her voice which was the aftermath of tears.

‘You wouldn’t leave me?’—sharply, even more concern in his voice now.

Hydee hesitated with her answer, thinking of her newly discovered love for him and feeling it would be humanly impossible for her to continue on for long lonely years, carrying the knowledge that there was no possible chance of her love ever being returned. Carlos was looking at her anxiously, and words left her lips that came unthinkingly, for in her unhappiness she scarcely knew what she was saying. ‘There’s nothing in my life, Carlos….’ She broke off as a sob choked the words. ‘No hope at all.’ She closed her eyes to trap the ready tears that came forth from the heavy cloud at the back of her eyes.

‘The children?’ Carlos’s voice seemed faintly harsh, and yet there was a very odd inflection in it which baffled her and at the same time set her nerves tingling uncontrollably. ‘What about them?’

‘Yes’—she nodded—‘they do fill my daytime hours, and indeed I did assume they’d fill my whole life, but they’re not enough. I didn’t realise at the time I agreed to marry you that I’d need something else to make my life complete….’

As her thoughts began to clear, she knew she could not continue. The possibility of giving herself away was too strong. It would be an unbearable embarrassment for her if he should ever learn that she had been so foolish as to fall in love with him.

‘Something else….’ Carlos was murmuring so strangely that Hydee searched his face, trying to read his thoughts. ‘I ought to have known, to have looked at the situation far more closely, anticipating an eventuality like this.’ His facia! muscles tightened as a sigh escaped him. Bewildered by his manner, Hydee could only stare, fascinated by the sudden pulsing of a nerve in his throat, the sign of a strong emotion within him. His eyes held hers, disturbing in their intent scrutiny. The silence stretched, brooding, oppressive, and Hydee was suddenly impelled to break it, asking him what he had meant. For answer she received a faintly sardonic smile which served only to baffle her even more.