Fears and Scars (8 page)

T
he pristine
white walls of the hotel lobby are a testament to my masterful self-control because I was a hair away from redecorating them with Young’s internal organs just now. There’s only one reason these walls are not splattered with red—Elizabeth. She’s had too much hurt and headaches in her life, I won’t add to it by throwing punches in front of her.

Real men suck it up and please their women, at least that’s what I do for the woman I love. Besides, revenge is a dish best served cold, and Young will get what he deserves.

When we get in the car, I call the front desk manager and tell him not to book Young into the hotel. Then I direct my PI to send Young the dirt I have on his family with the note ‘Hurt my wife again, and I’ll destroy everything you care about.’ After that, I slip my hand into Liz’s and concentrate on the sensation of her skin against mine.

Maria is in a good mood when we arrive. Liz’s eyes water when her granny praises her cooking skills, comparing her cupcakes to the ones her daughter, Lily, used to make.

Even though half the patients keep forgetting what we’re celebrating, everyone has a great time. They enjoy the food and even sing and dance. I have a hard time making excuses to all the old ladies asking me to dance. Explaining I have an imaginary leg sprain in Russian is beyond my capabilities, so I spend half an hour on the dance floor before Liz saves me.

“I think we need to leave now,” she says as we hold each other, swaying to the music. “I heard Mrs. Petrova say she thought you were into her and was about to ask you to join her in her room for some alone time.”

“Well, she may be seventy, but Mrs. Petrova was a professional dancer back in the day. She showed me her pictures. Besides, she’s still in good shape,” I reply with the most serious expression I can muster.

Liz’s eyes grow wide, and her eyebrows go up.

I chuckle. “Well, I suppose Doc won’t approve of that.”

Dr. Serov or ‘Doc’ as Liz calls him, is the head of this clinic. On top of being impressive at what he does, he cares about his patients and their families.

“Neither will I, mister.” She nudges me playfully.

We have a good laugh before Liz tells me, “I’m so happy, Ryan. I’ve never seen Granny smile so much in one day. She doesn’t realize what day it is and probably won’t remember the whole thing, but the other patients and staff really enjoyed today. So thank you.”

I kiss her cheek. “You’re welcome, sweetheart.”

There is nothing I won’t do for her.

“It’s already late. Let’s go home. You surviving all those dancing dolls calls for a bottle of champagne.”

“
T
oday
, one of the nurses at the clinic asked me how we met,” Elizabeth tells me when we’re back home seated on the sofa and sipping champagne. “I told her we shared mutual friends who introduced us.”

Well, I suppose that’s better than admitting the truth since I thought Elizabeth was an escort. Before I can say a word, my fiancée keeps going, “Oh my God, Ryan.” Her voice sounds alarmed. “What happens when our children ask us how we met?”

I smile at her. I love it when she talks about having my babies. Hearing her talking about our future definitely takes most of the sting out of running into Young today.

“We tell them the truth,” I answer with a wink.

She blinks and raises an eyebrow skeptically. “That you thought I was a hooker who slept with your brother, A.K.A. their uncle. Are you insane? We won’t tell them that!”

I can’t help but laugh. Teasing her is fun. “You’re just telling it all wrong, baby. We’ll stick to the most important part. Something like—your daddy was on a business trip, saw your mommy standing at the airport, and she took his breath away, along with his heart. Love at first sight. They’ll eat it up. Just wait and see.”

A dazzling smile lights up her eyes. “Aww. That was sweet. I still remember your irritated, angry, so full-of-love look when you ordered me to ‘put the damn sign down.’ That’s what love at first sight looks like?” She mocks me mercilessly.

“Yeah, smarty-pants. One look at you and I was a goner. Irritation and tantrums come packaged with my six pack,” I declare.

Liz likes my body. During my workouts, I push myself extra hard so that she keeps touching, kissing, and licking me.

“Is that right? Then why wasn’t there a warning label on that package?”

We laugh and drink some more before I gather the courage to ask her about something that’s been bugging me. After all, I promised I’d try not to hide my feelings from her.

“Liz?”

“Hmm?” she asks, taking a sip from her champagne flute.

“No matter how much I hate Young, he can give you something I can’t.” I push the words out of my mouth, and my chest burns from the admission.

She places her glass on the coffee table. “Not possible,” she protests as she scoots closer to me and rests her hand on my thigh. “You don’t really think that, do you?”

“I can’t give you the memories.”

Young can tell Liz thousands of stories from her past, which is something I can’t do no matter how much I want to.

A few seconds tick by while we stare at each other.

“Ryan, I don’t want to reminisce with David. I want a reality—a future—with you,” she says, lifting her hand to trace her thumb down my cheek.

Joy radiates in my chest and pulses through my veins.

“What we have is all I want and need. It’s more than I could ever imagine love would be.” Liz slips the glass from my hand, sets it next to hers on the coffee table, and then climbs onto my lap. Her long legs straddle my hips, and she frames my face with her palms. “You make me deliriously happy every second of every day.”

She kisses my jaw and then proceeds to kiss the side of my mouth, my nose, and my cheeks reassuring me with her sweet lips that I’m the one she wants.

I gently swipe the hair from her shoulder before curling my fingers at the base of her neck. My thumb strokes her cheek as I suck on her lower lip. Then I kiss her softly and tenderly, my tongue caressing and stroking hers. She tastes as sweet as always, and I recognize the sugary champagne we sipped. We explore each other’s mouths for long minutes, before she pulls back. “Can I ask you something?”

“Always.”

“Do your molars hurt?”

“Excuse me?” I’m completely confused.

A giggle sounds before she responds, batting her eyelashes at me. “I mean you were clenching your teeth so hard this afternoon at the front desk, I bet they hurt.”

A smile works its way across my face.

“Are you making fun of my self-control, woman?”

“No,” she says working the top button of my shirt free. “I want to know where you’re hurt so I can kiss those places and make them better.” Her fingertips brush over my breastbone as she moves to the next button and then the next. “How about we forget this whole disaster all together and have some fun?”

The last button comes undone, and she spreads my shirt apart, and then slips it over my shoulders.

Fuck, Elizabeth is the only woman on this earth that drives me crazy with need and makes me feel like the luckiest man alive all in the same breath.

“What you want me to do?” I ask her.

She subtly thrusts her hips against mine, brushing against my already hard cock, driving me fucking insane with wanting her.

“To hear you say the only thing that got you through an earlier run-in with David were the images of taking me on the dining table hard and fast running through your mind and proceed with doing just that.”

Her hips roll again, bluntly this time, and her palm presses into the front of my pants. I bite back the groan that wants to escape when her fingers curl and grip my length.

My fiancé is neither shy nor sheltered when it comes to sex. She definitely has a naughty streak. And it’s hard to imagine she was a virgin when we met. But each time she offers herself to me, I see the vulnerability in her eyes, mixed with trepidation and love.

“Liz?”

“Yeah?”

“Every ounce of self-control I had is gone,” I warn her. “It’s my time to run the show.”

“Okay,” she breathes out, letting go of me.

“We’ll take it slow at first. Before I fuck you, I need to remind you of something. Stay still.”

Lately, we’ve been using sex as a way to get lost or forget our problems. I need to remind her that when it comes us, it’s always more. So much more.

I pull her sweater up and over her head. Our gazes remain unbroken as I reach behind her and undo the clasp on her bra.

“Your skin is so damn soft,” I murmur and feel a shiver skating down her shoulders as I push the straps down her arms with a deliberate slowness. The cups fall away from her breasts, baring her to my gaze. I lean back and take her in; my eyes roam over her narrow waist and perfectly curved hips; my mouth watering at the sight.

“Gorgeous.” I can’t help but voice my thoughts, before tossing the lingerie to the floor. “I love your tits. So full and firm and perfect.”

My touch is light but very deliberate as I brush my thumb over her small, rose-pink nipple, kneading and pinching at the tender flesh around it. It hardens instantly, and her perky globes rise on a deep inhale.

“I want to make you mad with my touch,” I say, my voice low, and her breaths quicken. The heat between us is building with rapid speed. “‘Cause I’m mad with yearning for you all the time.”

She bites her bottom lip when I press my flattened palms against the warm, smooth skin of her thighs and move them up her body, my gaze locked with hers.

“I want you aware of nothing but me.”

Her breath hitches once I reach the top of her legs. I lightly trace along the lacy hem of her panties and between her spread legs. My hand closes around the strip of her thong to find them damp. The realization that I affect her as much as she intoxicates me makes me feel like the most powerful person in the entire universe. As my fingers push the fabric aside and slink their way between her folds, a needy whimper escapes her mouth. Music to my ears. I let the moment linger as I circle her opening, teasing us both. Even though the need to push my fingers inside her is killing me, I restrain myself and mentally clap myself on the back for being so controlled tonight.

Seeing Liz so wet and breathless for me is almost as good as watching her fall apart.

“What do you feel?” I ask her, my voice gravely from arousal. My fingers keep moving back and forth between her folds with the slowest, smallest strokes.

“I ache for you,” she breathes out.

“Good,” I declare as my hands skim upward.

I want her out of control, completely mad with lust.

Another whimper falls from her lips as I trail the flat of her stomach and brush undersides of her breasts. She moans when I envelop her taut nipple into my mouth and begin to suck gently. Her fingers thread through my hair, and she gives it a slight tug. Without thinking what I’m doing, I splay my hands across her back and press her body into mine. Skin on skin. And every logical thought is gone. I’m momentarily overwhelmed by the sense of connection that passes between us. It feels like not only her body but also her soul is imprinting onto mine all over again.

My fingers tighten around her waist.

While I was fueling her need for me, I also fueled my own desire. Now it can’t be contained until I sink balls deep into her sweet cunt.

To hell with slow. I want her too much.

My self-control has always been tissue paper when it comes to Liz.

I leave a trail of wet kisses from the pulse on her neck to below her ear and back again before pressing my lips to hers, my mouth eager, rough, and wild. She kisses me with the same intensity that I kiss her. Her mouth feels like silk as my tongue thrusts inside.

Shit, If I don’t move us to the bedroom, I’m going to fuck her right here on the couch in about ten seconds. Without breaking the kiss, I stand up and lift her in my arms. Her arms go around my neck, and she wraps her legs around me.

When we reach our destination, I set her down on the edge of the bed. She’s so beautiful in the soft glow of the bedside lamp. So fucking beautiful.

Her panties need to go. Now.

I grip the fabric and tug them down her long legs until they fall into a heap at her ankles and to the floor.

“Lay down,” I order gently.

I expect her to just scoot over to the headboard, but she does something unexpected—she stands up and turns around. My gaze quickly sweeps down the length of her, lingering on the curve of her delicious ass, the graceful arc of her back, and tiny dimples above her ass that drive me crazy. The little tease winks over her shoulder and then bends and crawls across the bed, giving me a glimpse of her pussy before turning around and lying down to rest her head on the pillows.

Her movements are elegant and erotic, and my dick literally itches to be inside her. But now that the two of us are playing this game, I have something else in mind.

“Spread your legs.”

She does as I command, slowly sliding her legs apart to reveal her pretty, pink pussy.

My tongue moistens my lips as I unabashedly admire her gorgeous body and try to plan out my next move. Lust racing through my veins is such a distraction that I’m having a hard time concentrating on anything other than that she’s soaking wet and ready for me.

I impatiently yank my jeans and boxers down and drop them to the floor while Elizabeth stares up at me with those big hazel eyes, her pupils dilated, her nipples pebbled.

Shit, she’s open right in front of me. Smooth and slick with arousal, bare except for the sexy strip of trimmed, dark hair.

My mouth waters.

I need to taste her, to feel her come on my tongue, and then get inside her and fuck her endlessly.

I go down to my knees on the floor in front of her, reach up for her legs, and gently drag her closer toward the end of the bed so my face is directly between her legs.

She arches off the bed and moans when I nip right over her folds and make several long licks up her center. My hands hold her hips down as I do it again and again. A fierce, primal need roars through my veins from her scent, her taste, and the pleasured hums that escape her lips again and again.