Read Feedback Online

Authors: Peter Cawdron

Feedback (9 page)

BOOK: Feedback
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Lily glanced at the color print out taped to the pole supporting the traffic lights. Her own smiling face looked back with Jason’s mobile number written on tiny stubs beneath. A couple of the stubs had been torn off, but that didn't mean anything. The wording beneath her photo read, “Lee, please call me.”

“Well, you guys took your time,” Helena said, getting to her feet. It was only then Jason noticed what Lily was wearing. When he’d left her in the morning she was wearing a baggy New York Jets t-shirt. Now she had a snug fitting t-shirt tucked into a pair of jeans. It was the wording on the t-shirt that took him off-guard. Lily noticed his attention focusing on the words and stepped back slightly, showing off the clothes she’d borrowed from Helena.

“You like?” Lily asked.

“Ah, yeah. I guess,” Jason replied, glancing at Helena. She had a grin a mile wide, while Mitchell was visibly trying not to laugh.

“It’s funny, no?” Lily asked. She pulled at the hem of the shirt, pulling it tight over her breasts so Lee could read the wording easily. Lee had no problem making out the large arrow pointing upwards and knew exactly what the wording beneath said:
My eyes are up here.

“And my eyes
are
up here!” Lily added with innocence in her voice.

Helena lost it, laughing as she put her arm around Lily briefly, hugging her as she said, “They certainly are.”

“I don’t get it,” Lily replied. “This is funny?”

“Hilarious!” Mitchell added.

“I’ll explain it to you later,” Jason replied, glaring at Helena.

“I knew you’d like it,” Helena said, batting her eyelids at Jason. “We girls have had a fun day. Lily is pretty much the same size as my roommate so it was no problem getting her a t-shirt and some jeans.”

“Hey,” Mitchell said. “Are we going to head off to the fireworks tonight?”

“Ah, yeah,” Jason replied, glancing at the time on his phone, surprised to see it was already five o’clock.

“No. We must wait for my father,” Lily insisted.

Jason gestured at the quiet streets around them, saying, “Lily, I don’t know where your dad is, but I know he wouldn’t want you waiting for him on a street corner. Maybe he got the dates wrong. You could be waiting here a long time.

“Honestly, I think we need to get in touch with your family back in South Korea. They must be worried about you. There must be someone there that can help us find your father.”

“He’s right,” Helena said, resting her hand gently on Lily’s shoulder. “There’s nothing more we can do here than we’ve already done.”

Helena pointed at the poster as she continued, gesturing at several other posters Jason had stuck up on each of the corners. “If your dad turns up tonight, he’ll call.”

Lily’s lower lip quivered. Her eyes cast down at the chewing gum stains on the concrete sidewalk. A tear came to her eye.

“Hey, it’s OK,” Jason said. “We’ll find him, or he’ll find us. Either way, we’ll get the two of you back together. Everything will work out for the best, you'll see.”

Lily nodded.

Mitchell signaled, tipping his head toward the 7-11 further down the road, giving Jason an excuse to leave Lily and give her a bit of space and some time to figure things out for herself. Helena nodded, picking up on Mitchell's signal and indicating she'd stay with Lily.

“Anyone hungry?” Mitchell asked. “Come on, there’s got to be something edible around here.”

“I’ll come with you,” Jason said, and the two young men walked off, leaving the girls on the street corner.

As they walked away, Mitchell spoke under his breath, saying, “I’m telling you, dude. It would be better if she were an alien. Less baggage.”

“Will you give it up?” Jason replied, wanting him to be serious. Jason understood a little of what Lily must be feeling, lost and alone in a strange city on the other side of the world. She probably did feel a little alien, although not in the extraterrestrial sense of the word.

Jason remembered how he’d felt when he’d visited Seoul. It was the little things that gave a feeling of dissonance, things you wouldn’t normally think twice about. Sure, he figured, there were the obvious cultural differences like the ceramic squat toilets in the rural areas, but even seeing something as benign as a stop sign with both Korean and English written on it had been strangely unsettling. He could speak fragments of Korean, but couldn’t read anything, leaving him feeling bewildered. At the time, he felt like he was on another planet.

There had been all the usual fast food restaurants in Seoul: McDonalds, Pizza Hut, Kentucky Fried Chicken. And they carried all the same staple items on their menus, but there were also offerings that catered to local palates: Korean fried chicken with soy sauce, Teriyaki McBurger and sweet potato pizza. Technically, there was nothing wrong with the combinations and flavors, they were just different, and that difference reinforced the sense of alienation for him. Jason supposed Lily was struggling with similar subtleties, things he'd overlook. So many things that seemed natural to him must have been jarring for her.

“Hey,” Mitch said as they walked up to the 7-11. “Where the hell's a hot dog stand when you need one?”

“They must have converged on the docks for the fireworks,” Jason replied.

The 7-11 had the usual array of junk food, with bags of potato chips and candy bars along with ramen noodles and milk, but there was nothing of any real substance. Mitchell bought some shriveled hot dogs in buns that looked like they were made from compressed cardboard. Jason smothered the hot dogs in ketchup and mustard, vainly hoping to impart some flavor. They walked back to the intersection with sauce dripping on the pavement behind them.

Lily was still pacing.

Jason handed her a hot dog and a can of Pepsi.

“Oh, this smells wonderful,” she said, looking at the brilliant reds and yellows drowning the long, thin dog and soaking into the white bread.

“New York’s finest,” Jason replied, laughing.

Mitchell coughed into a closed fist, blurting out a muffled, “Bullshit.”

Helena laughed as well. The four of them sat on the hard concrete, leaning up against the brickwork of an old building as they ate their dinner on the street corner. They could have crossed the road and gone up to his apartment, but sitting there felt right, as though they were providing solidarity in support of Lily.

“Hmm,” Lily said between bites. “This is good.”

Helena looked at Jason as she said, “No cheap dates, right? Promise me. You have got to take this girl to a real restaurant. Somewhere like Cipriani’s or 21 Club. Don't be a tight ass.”

“I promise,” Jason replied as the setting sun cast long dark shadows down the poorly lit alleyways. Helena had expensive tastes, but she was right. Lily should see the finer side of town. 7-11 didn’t cut it.

The streetlights came on, but the dark clouds rolling in overhead looked ominous.

“What’s the weather forecast?” Mitchell asked.

“It's supposed to be nice,” Helena replied.

“So are we going to the fireworks?” Mitchell asked.

“He’s like a little kid,” Helena said, talking to Lily. “It helps if you humor him.”

Lily smiled, saying, “Fireworks would be fun, wouldn’t they?”

“Yes,” Jason replied, noticing her smile seemed forced.

“There's a bus due soon,” Helena said.

“We could walk,” Mitchell replied. “It's only about four blocks.”

“You could walk,” Helena replied curtly. “Some of us are in heels.”

A few minutes later, a bus pulled up at the stop outside the 7-11. Mitchell and Helena climbed the steps, swiping their transport cards and laughing as they moved down the bus to a bunch of empty seats near the back.

Jason swiped his card and fumbled with his wallet.

“Exact change only,” the driver stated.

Jason gave up counting quarters and handed the driver a five dollar note, saying, “Keep the change.”

He took Lily's hand and led her down the bus. Even though she'd agreed to go to the fireworks, he could tell she longed to stay, and he half felt as though he should respect that and just return to his apartment to wait for her dad. And yet, there was no guarantee her father would show. How long could this go on? Lily had to have family back in South Korea she could call. And what would happen once she found her father, he wondered. At the moment, theirs was a relationship of circumstance, and not even a relationship, really.

Jason knew the stats. He'd been backpacking in Canada and had met people he thought he'd be friends with for the rest of his life. They'd swear they'd stay in contact. They'd exchange addresses, emails and even link up online, but in the end, they drifted away from each other as there was no bond, no common link between them, no basis for their friendship other than a chance meeting. Jason hated to think Lily would be the same, but he knew that was the most likely outcome. Oh, she'd tell her friends and family about her adventures in the Big Apple, she might even chat with him online once or twice, but before much time had passed they'd forget about each other and be strangers again.

The bus pulled away from the curb as he grabbed a handrail to steady himself and headed down the aisle. Lily seemed to fall further behind as the bus lurched on through the lights.

“Hey, guys!” Mitchell cried with his irrepressible smile, drumming his hands on the seat in front of him and signaling for Jason and Lily to sit down. “What do you say we hit a few bars afterwards, maybe a nightclub or two?”

Mitchell was up against the window, with Helena sitting on the aisle. Jason slipped into the seat in front of Mitchell, with Lily sitting beside him, although she didn't move up next to him, keeping one leg in the aisle. She was in two minds about the fireworks, that was obvious, and the idea of partying into the early hours of the morning didn't seem to appeal to her. Helena sensed it too.

“It'll be fun,” she said, reaching forward and massaging Lily's shoulders. Jason understood what Helena was trying to do, she was trying to help Lily relax. But Jason had a fair idea unwelcome contact would do more to upset Lily than to help. He felt much the same way about well meaning but uninvited contact. As he expected, Lily pulled away, leaning forward slightly. Helena took the hint and pulled her hands back.

The bus pulled up to another stop and an elderly man sitting across from them got up and left by the rear doors.

Lily mumbled, “I can't do this. I can't leave my father.”

A police car raced past with its lights flashing and its siren blaring.

Jason barely realized what was happening next. He was distracted by the police cruiser and the flickering blue and red lights lighting up the neighborhood. Suddenly, he realized Lily was gone. The rear door of the bus closed and the bus pulled away into the street again, leaving Lily standing on the sidewalk.

“No,” he cried, jumping out of his seat and running to the door.

The bus continued to accelerate.

“Stop the bus!” he cried, striking the door with his palm.

“Next stop's a hundred yards down the road,” the driver called out, making eye contact with him in his rear-view mirror.

“Let me off,” Jason yelled, again striking the glass in the door panels with the flat of his hand.

“What are you doing?” Mitchell cried out, still pinned by the window by Helena. “Leave her, dude. If she wants to wait on a street corner, let her do it. You don't owe her anything.”

Jason grabbed the emergency release lever and pulled. The door opened, but the bus was speeding along at easily thirty-five miles an hour. The concrete raced by in a blur. The wind howled through the open door, swirling into the footwell.

“Hey!” the driver called out. “What the hell do you think you're doing? Get back in your seat!”

The driver eased off the accelerator and onto the brakes with the kind of precision that had been missing from his driving so far. He slowed the bus, pulling over close to the curb. Jason watched as lampposts and trash cans whipped past, timing his jump.

“Don't you—“ the driver called.

“No!” Mitchell yelled.

Jason jumped from the bus, landing on the concrete sidewalk, surprised by his forward momentum. He could have sworn the bus had slowed to a running pace, but it must have been still moving considerably faster than he realized, and he found himself rolling on the pavement with his arms up protecting his head.

“You stupid dumb fuck!” the driver called out. He'd brought the bus to a halt about thirty feet away and had opened the front doors, standing on the bottom step as he shook his fist at Jason. “Damn kids!”

Jason got to his feet, grimacing at the skin torn from his forearms and his bloody elbows. Pain surged, surprising him with how much it hurt.

“What the hell is wrong with you?” Mitchell cried, stepping down out of the rear doors of the bus, followed by Helena.

“Just go on without me,” Jason called out, feeling stupid. He waved them away. What was wrong with him? This was unlike him. Jason wasn't one to be impetuous and stupid. As far as stupid went, that stunt was right up there with the dumbest things he'd ever done. If his head had struck the concrete he could have suffered a serious, life threatening concussion. People had died from less, and he knew it.

“What the hell is wrong with me?” he whispered, turning his back on Mitchell and Helena and looking at Lily in the distance.

The driver of the bus closed the doors and the bus pulled back out into the traffic, leaving them on the sidewalk. He could hear Mitchell walking up behind him.

“Oh, my God. Look at your arms!” Helena cried.

Jason could feel blood dripping from his fingers.

“I'm OK,” he said, raising a hand and requesting some distance. “Just ... give me some space.”

“No problem, dude!” Mitchell said, holding his hands out in a non-threatening gesture, his fingers splayed wide.

Jason ran down toward where he'd last seen Lily a couple of hundred yards away on the next block. He jogged across the street, barely pausing to look for traffic. She'd disappeared down a darkened alley. Rain began falling from the night sky. Twilight was over. Even with streetlights, the night seemed unusually dark.

BOOK: Feedback
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