Feel (28 page)

“Don’t worry, Saige.  I’m not going to use this to kill you.”  He runs the back of his hand down my cheek and my entire body shakes in revulsion.  “You are.”

Thrusting the palm of my hand forward, I ram it against the bottom of his nose and he falls backwards.  Nausea and dizziness rips through me as I scramble to my feet.  My ankle is jerked out from underneath me as I lunge for the door.  Sharp stabs of pain pricks my body as it crashes hard against the tile floor.

“Where you going, sweet Saige?”

My free foot connects with his jaw and he grunts in pain.  I like the sound of his pain a helluva lot more than mine.  The blade of the knife slices across my thigh, and my eyes widen as the dark blood seeps from my flesh, spreading across the denim of my shorts. 

“It feels good, doesn’t it?” Griffin’s lips curve slowly, “the cool blood running across your skin contrasting with the burn of the cut.  There’s nothing like that feeling, is there?”

I shake my head, scooting back from him.  His morbid insanity is petrifying.

“C’mon, Saige, you know you like to see your own blood, feel your own pain.  Did you cut yourself just so you could feel the release, bask in the euphoria of taking back the control you lost every single time you were near someone?”  His fingers brush against my knee, “Is it good?  Does it feel better than a sexual release?”

Hate consumes my soul as I stare at him watching me, studying me. 

A sly smile tilts the corner of his lip.  “No.  You didn’t, did you?  But you thought about it.  You held the knife to your skin, pressing the sharp tip against your flesh, wanting so badly to feel that release.”

Tears drip from my lashes, splashing onto my legs. 

He grins.  Admiration spills through his plagued darkness, and he takes my hand. 

I immediately jerk away, recoiling from his touch.

“You wanted to die.  You pushed limit after limit, mocking death, but you never took that final step.  You’re much stronger than I thought.  You fought to survive every time I was giving you a way out.  I underestimated you.”

“That’s because you’re a psychopathic dumbass who doesn’t know jack shit!” I spit, never breaking eye contact as I provoke him.

His hand grabs my throat, jerking me forward before slamming my head backwards.  My lips tremble and head aches as I concentrate, pulling on the brief shot of strength from the break in his hold.  I don’t waste any time before focusing on Jensen, feeling the calm thoughts thinking of him always provides.  The crack of my head against the wall resonates just as the pain bursts across my skull, spiraling down my neck from another harsh blow.  Suppressing my smile, I feed on another shot of strength, being sure to think of every memory of Jensen my mind can conjure. 

Griffin raises his hand to hit me, then stops.  His eyes narrow.  “The reason you like to feel your own pain is because it drowns out everything else you feel…including me,” he states slowly.  “You’re very clever, Saige, but you can’t outsmart me.”

I just did, asshole
.

“I can’t have you drowning me out.” Griffin grabs my wrist and pries my hand open, shoving the knife against my palm.  His grasp tightens painfully around my wrist as he restrains me.  “This is for later, Saige.  When you can’t take anymore, you can cut yourself.  I can’t wait to see how many slices it takes before you decide cutting yourself isn’t enough and you slice that blade across your wrist, taking back control for the last time.”

Locking my eyes on his, I breathe as deeply as possible, swallowing the disgust of how degradingly vile it feels connecting to him on my level.

“Let’s pass the time getting to know each other a little better.  Me - I know you figured out I used to train under Jensen’s father.”  He lets out a chuckle, “He was the best teacher I had.  Funny, huh?  When I felt the little crew after me, I was surprised to find out Jensen was leading them, but I was even further surprised at how I couldn’t sense him.  I began to do some research and found out why.  I knew I had to get Jensen out of the way, but out of respect for his father, I didn’t want to kill him, which was the most surprising to me.”

Griffin leans close to my face, his eyes searching mine before he smiles.  “I have no problem killing anyone.  I knew that getting rid of you would be enough to destroy Jensen, make sure he gave up on everything.”  He runs the back of his hand against my cheek, “You had no idea that he pined over you every day.  Even not knowing where you were and not seeing you in so long, you consumed him.  I didn’t need to be able to feel him to figure that out.”  He grimaces, “It was pathetically sweet, really.”

A shot of hatred causes me to gasp and Griffin laughs. “You’re going to love my deeper, more intimate feelings, but not yet.  I like watching you feeling me.”

My strength is fading, but I refuse to let go of the connection.  “Why did you kill your sister?”

Rage fills his eyes.  He raises the back of his hand to strike me, but stops.  His fist clenches in mid-air before he relaxes, then begins to laugh.  “You are very clever.”  Taking a deep breath, his eyes dance when he gives a shrug of his shoulder.  “She was getting stronger than me.  I was always the one whose abilities were unsurpassed.  I was the powerful one.  When Kali turned fourteen, her powers became stronger and she just wouldn’t stop growing.  When she got to close to my level.  I killed her.”

The way he talks about taking his sister’s life like it was nothing sickens me.  “What about the bombs?  Why start killing people without powers?”

“Because it’s fun.”  His laughter churns the nausea burning my stomach.  “My father was very gifted.  He could manipulate, create, and destroy fire.  He never understood the possibilities of what he could do with his power and wasted his life working at a factory.  When some of his friends found out what he was capable of, they decided to screw with his head.  It got out of hand one night and my father lost his temper, starting a fire that ended up taking his life and destroying the factory.  I found out who his friends were and decided they needed to suffer the same fate.”  He chuckles, squeezing my wrists together in one hand as he holds his other hand up, and I see his scar.  “Pyrokinesis.  That’s the one power I could never learn, and that really pissed me off for years, but I can adapt.  I turned towards making bombs, which is so easy to learn with a few hours on the Internet.  I began bombing the building where each of my father’s friends worked.”

Twisting my wrists against his grasp, I want to scream from the strength of his hold.  Grinding my teeth together until they hurt, I stifle that desire, refusing to give him any satisfaction.  “Why didn’t you just kill his friends?  Why kill everyone else?”

“Didn’t you listen?” he taunts.  “Because it’s so much fun taking a life.  People are weak.  They have the ability to do what we can, but they don’t even try.  They’re a waste, nothing.  They don’t deserve to be here.  My father’s friends have been dead for a year now, but I was having so much fun, I didn’t want to stop.” He pauses, picking up another knife as he points it at my nose.  “Your friends died because of you, Saige.  I bombed the college to kill you.  If you were gone, Jensen would wither away and give up on me.  But you felt me.  I didn’t expect that, but I rather came to enjoy it, knowing what I felt, you felt.  I enjoyed our connection.  Until you crossed a line.”

Pain slices through my wrists as his bruising grasp squeezes tighter.  His rage engulfs me.  Sinking against the wall, I think of the day on the playground and the feel of Jensen’s hand when he took mine, needing his calm desperately. 

“What about you, Saige?  When did you discover your abilities and why in the hell do you use them to save people?  You risked your life to save Jensen, Andy, and Sam.  Jensen I can understand, but why them?  Why Amira?  What did you save her?  I know you don’t like her.”

Just how deep he is imprisoned into his own dark, sick depravity slams fear and hope inside.  “I don’t like her, but I don’t want her dead.  See, that’s where you and I are nothing alike.  I’m not a twisted bastard with megalomaniac, grandiose ideas of justice.”  A smile slowly pulls at the corners of my lips as I focus my gaze back on his, “Except maybe when it comes to you.  You – well, I would love to know how it feels to end your sad, pathetic life.”

His laughter fills the room before he stabs me with another dose of his emotions.  They sizzle through my veins worse than the current of the electric shock treatment they tortured me with at the institution and I can’t contain the scream that pierces the air.

Jensen

Andy’s mouthing off to Axe, and Darrin is laughing at all the bullshit banter when Josie bursts through the door.  Darrin drops the part he was getting ready to attach when he sees her expression.

“What’s wrong, baby?”

Josie’s face is so damn white it’s scaring the hell out of me as Darrin places his hand on her face when she starts to cry.  “Griffin escaped as he was being transported to a different facility yesterday.  It was on the news, and I can’t get ahold of Saige.”  Her voice turns to panic, “I couldn’t get ahold of any of you.  I can’t get a read on Griffin but I know he’s close.”

Grabbing my cell phone, I go to dial Saige myself, trying to fight my own panic, but I have no service.  Not wasting anytime to try to figure out why, I race to my bike and tear out of the lot.  My chest pounds excruciatingly as I push the bike to its maximum speed.  The usual twenty minute drive is only a fraction of that but it feels so fucking long until I slide in the gravel in front of our house.  Dropping my helmet, I race inside.  My heart freezes, stops beating, when I see Saige covered in blood and lying on the kitchen floor. 

“Look at me, baby,” I plead, giving her a gentle but firm shake.  Her eyes find mine and I can see how weak she is.  Swearing under my breath, I grab a towel, pressing it against the slash on her upper thigh.  I grab my cell to call an ambulance, but it’s still not working. 
Dammit!
“C’mon, pretty girl, stay with me here.” The vacant look in her eyes scares the shit out of me and I shake her harder.  “Talk to me, Saige!”

I hear Andy yelling my name and I call to him, telling him to stay with Saige as vile thoughts produce a string of filthy expletives as I grab two buckets, filling them with ice.  Pain stabs my heart when I fill the tub with cold water and pour the ice inside.  My soul fills with rage as I think of Griffin, of what he’s done to Saige.  Biting back tears, I head back to the kitchen and lift her sweat and blood soaked body into my arms.  My heart feels like it’s going to splinter into a million pieces as she leans her forehead against my chest.  Exhaustion has joined the fight, strengthening Griffin’s torture of emotional hell.  “Hang on, baby,” I whisper, brushing my lips against her damp hair, “hang on.”

Andy looks at the tub then at me, sorrow darkening his eyes as he swallows hard, knowing this is fucking killing me. 

“I’m sorry, Saige.  I’m so sorry,” I choke before lowering both our bodies into the freezing water.  There’s no way in hell I’m putting her through this without me being right there with her.

Saige’s eyes spring open as her back arches and she gasps from the frigid cold.  She scrambles to get out of the tub but I pull her back into the water, swearing loudly as her eyes land on mine, tears streaming down her face. 

“Fight it, Saige,” I demand, wanting to rip my fucking heart out from the pain in her eyes. 

“Let me out, Jensen, please,” she begs, desperately grabbing my shirt and pulling herself towards the edge of the tub, towards warmth. 

“I need you to feel this, baby,” I plead, my voice breaking as my own tears spill down my face, “I need to break the connection he has on you.”

Saige struggles harder, ripping my shirt and scratching the hell out of me as she fights to get out of the tub.  I grab her wrists, immediately letting go when she winces and I see the bruises covering them.  Swearing loudly, I wrap my arms around her chest, keeping her restrained to me and in the tub until I feel her body responding.  With every second, she gets stronger, weakening the connection Griffin has on her.  As soon as I see the light back in her eyes, I pull her from the water and yell at Andy to grab clothes as I strip the soaked shirt and shorts from Saige’s trembling body. 

“I’m s-sorry,” Saige mumbles through blue lips as her body trembles violently. 

Stripping my shirt, I let it fall to the floor as I pull her freezing body against my chest, desperate to warm her while silently demanding Andy to hurry.  “You didn’t do anything wrong, baby.  Just look at me.  Keep your eyes on me, Saige.” 

Andy finally returns, keeping his gaze locked on the floor as I shove the sweatshirt over Saige’s head and pull her arms through the sleeves.  Her body is shaking so hard, I have to keep my arm wrapped around her waist as I help her step into the pants.  Quickly, I strip out of my clothing and put dry ones on before turning my attention back to Saige.  I help her put on socks, leaving the shoes, not willing to waste any more time for Griffin to fuck with her mind again. 

“Come on, Saige.  I’m taking you to where he can’t hurt you anymore,” I swear, lifting her into my arms and carrying her to my bike. 

“No!  He’s gone.  He left when he heard you turning on the road.”

“He just left? He tried to kill you.  He tried to kill Sam.  No, he’s still close, and I’m going to kill the bastard.” Andy growls, touching his hand to the bruises on Saige’s throat.  “I’ve got a read on him,” he calls before taking off through the house.

“Andy, wait!” I yell after him, but he’s already out the door.

“I know where he’s going, too,” she rasps.  “He’s hurt.  He tried to get me to kill myself, but when he heard you coming, it caught him off guard, and I stabbed him.”  Her chin falls, and her fists coil against her sides, “I was weak, so it wasn’t deep, but it was enough to hurt him.”

When Saige’s words register, my heart does a free fall.  “You stabbed him?  He almost took you with him when he died last time, Saige.  He might do it again.  What if you can’t bring yourself back?”

Her eyes close as she rocks her head back and forth, “You saved me last time.  It was hearing you that brought me back.  But I have him now.  I found a way inside his head.  I was already too weak when I figured it out earlier, but I’m not now.”

“What are you talking about?  How do you know where he’s going?”

“Your father.”

“What?” I ask, shaking my head, wondering if Saige is still dazed from what he’s done to her.

“I don’t have time to explain it, Jensen,” she cries. 

“Give me the short version,” I demand.

“Griffin was torturing me with his emotions, using how I can feel him and how that feeling is stronger through the connection to try to get me slice my wrist.”

Rubbing my hand over the soft skin of her wrist, I bite back my rage at the bruises marring her skin there, but relief spills through my veins when I see it’s free of any cuts.  I know Saige is strong, but so is Griffin.

“I used your father’s techniques to make that connection work both ways.  He blocked me from feeling him until he was too close for me to get away.  The more he opened up to me, filling me with his disease-” she shudders, and I pull her into my arms, but she pushes away, shaking her head.  “We’re running out of time.  We have to get to him while I still have the connection.”

“No!  You’re not going anywhere near him.  He’ll feel you, Saige,” I adamantly demand.

Her wet hair falls over her shoulders as she shakes her head, “No, he won’t.  I know how to block him from feeling me until I want him to.  With him connecting to me, I found my own connection to him.”

“Tell me where he’s going.  I have to follow Andy.”

Saige rushes towards the door, “I’m going with you!”

Raking my hands through my hair, I want to scream by not having time to argue with her as I race outside behind her. 

Darrin’s bike sputters gravel as he slides to a stop next to me.  “Sorry, man.  I had to get Josie calmed down.”  His gaze shifts to Saige and he swears when he sees the bruises on her neck. 

“Stay with Saige.  I have to find Griffin.  Andy’s already after him.”

Saige cranks the ignition on my bike while I’m talking to Darrin, calling over her shoulder, “I told you I’m going.”  She shoves the helmet over her head and takes off before I can grab her.

“
Dammit!
” Looking around for her bike, I don’t see it anywhere so I hop on the back of Darrin’s as he tears after Saige.  “Go faster!” I yell, reaching behind me and gripping the bar on the back of the seat as I try to wipe the wind induced tears from my eyes as we speed down the highway behind Saige.

We’ve only gone about ten miles when Saige pulls to the side of the road, ripping the helmet off her head as we pull next to her.  “He’s going to an abandoned house on the other side of this field.  If he hears us coming, he’ll kill Andy.” 

“He knows Andy took off after him?” The damn panic heightens.

Her eyes dim, “Griffin felt him and attacked Andy before he had the chance to see him.”

“Stay here with Darrin,” I growl.

She starts to protest but I won’t allow her as I tell Darrin to keep her there. 

“Wait!” she calls after me.  “Let me know when you’re there.  I’ll distract him when you go in.”

“My phone doesn’t work.”

“It will here.  He blocked the signal at the house, but it should work now.”

Telling her to call the cops, I promise I’ll call her when I’m at the house and she finally agrees to stay with Darrin as I sprint through the field.  Crossing over the creek, I crest the hill and see the house.  Andy’s bike is on its side, and I quickly scan the yard but don’t see anyone.  There’s some kind of light burning through one window and I stay on the darkest side of the yard as I inch closer to the home, pulling my phone out of my back pocket and dialing Saige.

“Alright,” I hear her breathing into the phone.  Her fear stings my heart when she tells me not to go in through the front door because he’s wired it.  I hear her sucking in a deep breath before she sounds calmer when she tells me to be careful and to wait a minute before going in because she’s going to distract him.  I have a pretty good idea as of how she plans on doing that and pride bursts through my chest when I hear her growl, “You want to play with madness, Griffin?  Well, here’s your mindfuck, you sick bastard.”

There are a few seconds of silence, then I hear her weakened voice come back on the phone, “Go now.  Through the back door.”

Bursting through the way Saige instructed, I see Griffin holding a gun on Andy.  He has a slash on his side from where Saige cut him, but he doesn’t seem to have lost much blood.  He looks stunned and agitated when he swings around, and I land a blow against his jaw as a shot splinters into the wall behind me.  Sending my foot hard against Griffin’s ribs, I kick him hard enough to send him against the wall as I grab the gun off the floor.

The bastard’s quick and hits me from behind before I can turn around, sending the gun scattering across the floor and under an old, soiled couch.  I crash my elbow against his jaw as he goes to take another swing and he stumbles backwards, giving me a few seconds to look at Andy.  His eye’s bleeding and his mouth is taped shut, but appears fine otherwise. 

Griffin lunges for the gun, but I kick a discarded crate, knocking it into the back of his legs, and he falls on top of the couch.  Grabbing his neck, I begin to squeeze as he struggles against me.

“You can’t protect her forever,” he gasps.  “She’s like your mother.”

Easing my grip, I press my knee harshly into the small of his back as he screams in pain before spitting out, “She’s weak, but her abilities are getting stronger.”  His voice fills with admiration as he continues, “She used my own feelings against me.  My own memories of killing my sister to distract me.  Do you have any idea how long it took for me to inject my feelings on someone else?  She won’t be able to handle what she can do.  She’s fantasized of killing herself, cutting her wrists and watching the blood drip out of her.  You can’t save her, Jensen.  She’ll end up breaking sooner or later.”

“No.  She survived.  She’s always survived.  She chose life!  You’re the weak one, you sick bastard!  The only way you can survive is from gaining strength by destroying others.”  Tightening my arm around his throat, I squeeze, cutting off his air as he struggles.  “How does it feel, Griffin?  What does it feel like not being able to breathe, not being able to catch one pathetic shred of air, you piece of shit?” 

Once he goes limp, I let him fall to the floor.  I want to kill him, bleed every drop of blood from his body, but flashes of him pulling Saige with him as he was dying in that garage stops me.

Saige bursts through the door, “The police are on their way.”

Ramming my fist against Griffin’s jaw, he grunts, and I jerk him away from the couch, shoving him into a chair before grabbing the tape next to Andy’s chair and wrapping it tightly around Griffin’s wrists. 

Saige steps beside me.  She stares at Griffin silently a few seconds before she curls her fist and crashes it against his mouth, knocking him and his chair to the ground.  I watch as she stands over him, flexing her hand, with a smile slowly spreading across her lips, “Do you enjoy our connection now, asshole?” 

I wrap my hand around Saige’s shoulder, pulling her against me. 

“Are you alright?” she mumbles against my chest.

“I’ve got you.  You’re safe.  That makes everything alright, pretty girl,” I answer honestly, brushing my lips against her forehead, breathing her in.  She makes everything feel alright.

Sirens blare in the background as Darrin cuts the tape from Andy’s wrists, but I barely hear them when I stare at Saige, seeing how she’s fine.  She’s not weak or hurting from Griffin’s presence.  “You really did figure out how to block him, didn’t you?”