Fierce: New Adult Sport Romance (The Boys of Winter Book 4) (30 page)

Neal smiles. “Hold that thought. I’ll be right back.”

Silverware clinks softly amongst the light buzz of conversation, and a waiter comes over with a menu for me and tells me about the specials. Not that I need to hear them. I’ll be having the elk like almost every other time I come here.

A few minutes later, Neal returns and makes himself comfortable as he sits across from me. “I’m all yours.” He raises his eyebrows and continues, “For the entire evening.”

I chuckle. “You’re too much.” But I play along and add, “I won’t be needing you for quite that long.”

He lifts his glass to me and takes a sip. “Tell me your plans.”

I go into detail about my ideas for the two new shops and voice my concerns about hiring the right people to run them. When it’s time to order dinner, he asks for elk too.

We continue to discuss business, and he shares stories of his own. I learn that he’s a self-made man and marvel at how much he’s accomplished in his thirty-plus years. It explains his direct ways, and again I imagine he’ll be a great catch for the right girl.

Metal scrapes against the tablecloth as a waiter clears the crumbs off our table. He presents us with the dessert menu. I’m not quite full, so we order coffee and a chocolate soufflé to share.

Neal says, “I think your plans are rock solid. I’ve become more discriminating in who I’ll let lease from me these days. Especially in towns where I don’t live. Too many tenants have closed shop and disappeared overnight, leaving me with an open space in the middle of a season. If you can find something that suits you, it’s yours.”

Our coffee arrives, and steam rises from the cups. I smile because Neal knows how hot I like it, and the liquid appears to be practically boiling. I’m not sure how the waiter knew, but I’m grateful. “Thanks, Neal. I’m glad I came tonight. I’ve enjoyed hearing about your career. It’s impressive.”

His voice is sincere when he says, “So are you. You’re well on the way to putting me to shame. We would make a great team.” He reaches over and takes my hand. His fingers are strong and warm against mine. “If you and Christian don’t work out, I want to be next on your list.”

He’s no longer flirting, and discomfort makes me pull my hand away. “That’s sweet, but you’re too much of a player for me. I don’t share well.” I smile to lighten the mood. “Besides, too many hearts would be broken if you ever settled down.”

He leans back and stares at me for a moment. “Did it ever occur to you players only play because they haven’t found the right one? I think you’re it for me, and when you’re ready, I’ll be waiting.”

Damn it. He must know Christian’s been gone this whole time.
I can’t fault him though; this is the kind of mind that swoops in for great business deals. It makes sense he would do the same for the woman he wants. This is a side of Neal I could be attracted to.

I don’t respond and lift my wineglass to swallow down the last bit instead. I’m intensely aware of the alcohol burning its way down my throat. Dessert arrives before I have to figure out what to say, and I dig in. The light texture floats on my tongue as the chocolate makes me want to groan in appreciation. I control it though, no need to infuse our conversations with sexual suggestions.

Neal doesn’t share the same restraint. He lets out a guttural noise I imagine races right to the core of his conquests. Licking the spoon slowly, he lowers his eyelids, and damn it, his green eyes give me a small tingle. I take a sip of scalding coffee and swallow it quickly to squelch any hint of desire.

He’s good, and I’m just vulnerable enough that I’m letting him affect me. I’m tempted to pull out my phone and send Christian a text, but that thought makes me sad, knowing he won’t reply. Yeah, I think it’s time to get home before I let my bruised ego go a little too far with flirting. Playing that game with Christian taught me how that can go.

I take one more bite of dessert and sigh. “Dinner tonight was truly wonderful. It’s been too long. I really have to come here more often.”

Neal doesn’t touch me, and I think he’s sensed my mood. “Yes, you really should. Now, let’s look at dates for a trip to Aspen and Vail.”

His schedule is tight, but we find a date at the end of February. As he holds my coat for me, he says, “Please don’t make me wait until our trip to see you again. Come back for dinner soon.”

“Don’t worry, I will. The elk and soufflé were too good to forget. Now that I’ve had them again, I won’t be able to resist for long.”

Neal leans in and kisses my cheek. He doesn’t pull away until he whispers. “Someday I hope I’m what you can’t resist.”

Ignoring the way his breath on my skin makes me want to be touched, I squint my eyes at him and smile. “You’re a wicked man.”

He holds out his palms and grins. “It’s all part of the charm.”

You got that right.
I leave wishing phone sex with Christian actually was an option.

Chapter 49

Even th
ough I know it’s the weekend, and Gretchen’s probably working Christian over for his recent behavior, I give in to the urge to text him. I tap out,
“Miss you. Call me?”

I almost faint when he replies instantly.
“We do need to talk. I’ll call later.”

My stomach sinks because I don’t think our talk is going to be a good one. I slip my phone in my back pocket. A shipment of cowboy boots came in yesterday, and I focus on getting the new styles on the floor and organizing the boot storage section. It’s busy work, but will keep my mind occupied so I don’t obsess about Christian.

The scent of leather is strong with all the new boots I’ve set on the floor. I’ve taken them all down to rearrange the shelves so I can highlight the most expensive ones. Of course Christian calls, and I hate that I’m about to walk away and leave a mess. But I don’t dare put him off.

I give Tasha an apologetic smile as I walk back toward the office and answer the phone. “Hi.”

“Hi. First off, I want to apologize for leaving you to fend for yourself with Rhinestone Cowgirl. I know I dropped the ball.”

The door clicks softly behind me when I close it. “Christian, your father died, and I’ve been fine dealing with everything for you. No apologies necessary.”

“Thank you.” He sighs and my stomach clenches as I wait for the blow. “It’s time to hire a bookkeeper. I’m not coming back to Colorado.”

I sink into the chair and brace my forehead with my fingers as I lean on the desk. Faint indents of words from someone’s homework glare in the light. The news would be a slap in the face if I hadn’t suspected something like this was coming. “I see. I’ll get on that.”

I wait for what he has to say about us because my pride won’t let me be the first to bring it up. He says softly, “Princess.”

I want to yell at him to not call me that as he breaks my heart. Instead, I wait for the rest.

“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have even moved to Colorado in the first place. I made a mistake leaving New York, and need to get back to that life.”

Fuck you, Christian.
I get up to pace. He might as well just say I’m the mistake. “Got it. Do you want me to buy you out of Rhinestone Cowgirl?”

A tag is on the floor, and I bend down to pick it up as he says, “No. I want to still be part of your life if we can make it work. Maybe—Maybe we can sell it.”

What the hell?
“I don’t understand. Are you asking me to move to New York City?” I throw the tag away and step on the garbage to pack it down, making more room.

“Would you?”

But his tone isn’t a question. It’s almost an accusation that he knows I wouldn’t. Is he trying to make me break up with him so I’m the bad guy?

“I don’t know.” My initial thought is no way. I can’t imagine life in the city with three busy dogs, never mind selling off the shop I’ve worked so hard to create for a guy that’s moving without asking me first. “I’ll have to think about it.”

I yank out my ponytail and rake my hand through my hair. Everything about this feels wrong. This isn’t the sort of thing you just suggest over the phone. My eyes burn with tears. “Would I move in with you?”

“Yeah, I have a great apartment.” His voice should be excited, but instead it sounds strained.

“Look, it’s hard to talk to you on the phone when I can’t see your face, because you don’t sound excited about this. Asking me to move across the country to be with you should be something that feels wonderful. Right now it doesn’t.”

“You’re right. I’m not sure what I want, and it’s not fair to ask you to give up everything, I’m sorry.”

I kick an empty cardboard box, and it flies across the room. “Damn it, Christian. What the hell is going on? You don’t really want me to move for you, so why suggest it?”

Anger comes through the phone at me. “Because I’m being a coward. Because I wanted you to be the one to decide we’re over.”

My teeth are clenched, and I wish I were somewhere I could slam something without causing a scene. The contents of my stomach burn like acid. “Fine, I’ll do it. We’re done. No, I won’t give up my life here to be trapped in the city with active dogs, no job, and a boyfriend that doesn’t love me anymore. Happy?”

“That’s not true. I haven’t stopped loving you. Fuck. This isn’t how I wanted to do this.”

“Yeah? What the hell, Christian? Did you think I’m like Taylor and I would just dump you for no good reason? I would never hurt you like that. I don’t know what your problem is, but you better figure it out.” I end the call, but it’s not satisfying to only push a touch screen so I throw my phone against the wall. The crack tells me I probably broke it, but I stomp on it to make sure as hot tears roll down my cheek.

It pisses me off that I cry when I’m mad, and the hanger flips up and smacks the wall when I grab my coat from the rolling rack. I force myself to leave the shop without stomping, but once I’m outside, all bets are off and I pound down the brick alley to the parking lot.

With my head down I continue to stomp through the snow-covered cars, and kick a tire or two on my way. Pain throbs through my foot when I get to my car, but I’ve calmed down enough that I want to curl up in a ball and sob. Instead I get inside and search for napkins in my center console.

I notice Neal walking toward his space next to me.
Shit.
I slither down to the floor to hide. When I get there, I start to laugh, hoping he doesn’t look my way because I can’t even imagine how I would explain it to him. When I hear the hum of his engine fade the tears return, and my body shakes with uncontrollable sobs. I stay crumpled up under the dashboard until I’m shivering from the cold.

***

The next morning I drive to Frisco to replace my phone. I check my texts first, and Gretchen has sent one asking me to call. I’m waiting until I get to work to read the ones from Christian. The line I could read in notifications on my screen started off with “I love you,” and I’m pretty sure what follows isn’t anything I want to hear. I grip my phone so hard in anger I’m afraid I’ll break it again, so I force myself to stop.

Driving back to Breck, I call Gretchen. She answers the phone without a hello. “If I thought I could get away with it, I’d slice off his balls.”

She shocks me into a smile as the sun breaks out from behind a cloud and I flip down the visor. “That would be kind of gross, because you’d have to touch them.”

“Oh. Good point. What if I wore rubber gloves?”

“You’d still feel the squish factor of your own brother’s privates.” I unclip the holder that contains my sunglasses, and the plastic is cold on my nose when I slide them on.

“Eeww. I don’t know how you just managed to gross me out. Good one.”

I chuckle and then say, “Thanks for making me laugh. My life sucks so bad right now.” My glasses fog up from the heat of my skin, and I pull them down my nose to clear.

“I’m sorry. Christian’s got this whole disappointed-in-himself pityfest going on right now. He seems to think my father thought he was running away from his problems by moving to Breck and thinks he needs to return to his old life. It’s not like he can bring him back. But he’s not listening to anyone right now.”

“I don’t get it. I thought his old life made him crazy?”

“It did. I bet he isn’t going to last two weeks before he’s tearing his hair out.”

I glance in the rearview mirror to see if anyone is behind me. “When is he moving back?”

“He left yesterday and starts work tomorrow.”

Nice of him to keep me informed. “Did he tell you we broke up?”

“Oh, shit. No. He said he was going to try to make it work long distance until you were ready to move to New York. I figured he wouldn’t last long enough for it to be a problem.”

“That’s not exactly how it went. He did ask me to move there, but he didn’t mean it. We’re done.” I lift my coffee mug to take a sip, but the queasiness in my stomach makes me put it back down.

“Oh, Nika, I’m so sorry. I know it doesn’t help, but he still loves you.”

“I don’t know about that. But even if he does, it’s not enough for him.” My vision is blurry as I try to focus on the road and keep from crying. My sunglasses clatter when I toss them onto the dash.